


That (Repeated) Moment of Déjà Vu

by DarkJediQueen



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: AU, Adultery, Alternate Universe, Canon? What Canon?, Child Abuse, Dammit Dave, F/M, Graphic depictions of violence - Freeform, Happy Ending, Hotch Centric, M/M, Murder, Rape, Time Travel, canon character death, canon level violence, spousal abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-14
Updated: 2016-02-03
Packaged: 2018-05-06 17:36:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 55
Words: 111,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5425844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkJediQueen/pseuds/DarkJediQueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Throughout his childhood years, Aaron had a best friend. His name was Tristan but when Aaron’s dad died, Tristan never came back. He's always wondered about him. Years later, he meets a young man, Doctor Spencer Reid, and he's just as enamored with him. And he can’t figure out why, then past and present slam together in the middle of a life altering moment.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Arc 1-May 1971

**Author's Note:**

> **Spoilers** : Up Through Season 10
> 
>  **Notes** : Based loosely on the time travel method of "The Time Traveler's Wife." I've messed around with some things. 
> 
> **Warnings** : Child Abuse, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Murder, Rape, Canon Character Death, Spousal Abuse, Adultery, 
> 
> **Beta** : [Reidemption](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Charlie_Remington/pseuds/Reidemption)

Aaron Hotchner was sitting in his backyard listening to the silence of the house. The groundskeeper was gone for the day and the cleaning staff was as well. It was rare that the staff and his parents were gone but given that his mother had gone into labor two weeks early, it wasn’t a shock. It was early afternoon and Aaron had been trying to make himself go inside and get something to eat. He was hungry but didn’t want to leave the solitude of outside. Before his father had dismissed the cook for the day, she’d made him up some sandwiches that he could grab out of the refrigerator and eat when he wanted. 

The rustling of a bush at the back edge of the property shocked Aaron. Animals rarely wandered onto their property. He waited to see what could be coming towards him when he saw a head of human hair bobbing in and out of the bushes. He wasn’t sure if the person was crouched or just really small because the head of hair was shorter than him. He wasn’t small for his age but to be out and about in someone else’s yard was odd for someone smaller than him. The only reason he was left alone was that his father didn’t care for him at all. 

Watching, Aaron followed the small person as they moved from one end of the property to the other. He waited as the person stopped and settled down. When he was sure that the person wasn’t moving anymore, Aaron peeked into the bushes. Sitting there was a small naked boy wearing glasses. He looked to be very small. A lot smaller than Aaron.

“Hello,” Aaron said. The boy jumped up and scrambled backward from him. His eyes wide with fear and Aaron didn’t like it. He’d been tempted to jump into the bushes and follow the boy but he decided against it. He stayed where he was as the boy continued a backward motion. Until he tripped on a plant and fell backwards onto his butt. “I’m not going to hurt you. I promise.”

The boy just eyed him, not moving except for his eyes. Those eyes darted back and forth. Aaron was shocked at the look of the eyes. He looked smart. Aaron had been called smart. His teacher had wanted to push him up a year or two after only a month of kindergarten but his father had said no. Instead his teacher had given him homework that was closer to his actual intelligence than the rest of the class.

“My name is Aaron. What’s yours?”

“Sp…Tristan. My name is Tristan.” The boy pushed himself up to a sitting position and drew his legs to his chest to hide his groin. Aaron pulled his long shirt off. He had a t-shirt on underneath it. The cook had made him promise to keep both on if he stayed outside for more than hour. While it was May, there was still a chill in the air as night approached. Aaron took a step towards the boy but he didn’t try and move again. Another careful step and the only thing the boy did was tense up some and eye him harder. Aaron leaned over and handed him the shirt. He was close enough now that he could see the boy was shivering. He didn’t know if it was fear or cold. 

“Put it on so you don’t get cold.”

Tristan looked at the shirt for a minute and then did as he asked, quickly. When his head popped through the head hole of the shirt, Aaron laughed. His hair was messed up. Aaron reached out and the boy tensed harder but when Aaron only calmed down the mess of hair, the boy relaxed some. 

“What are you doing out here?”

“I woke up over there,” the boy pointed as he spoke and Aaron looked that direction. It was farther back on the property. His family owned a lot of the woods around the house. How did the boy get lost and wake up in the woods? He wondered if the boy’s parents knew that he was lost. He also wondered how he’d become naked? Had he wandered away and got his clothes wet or dirty and had stripped them off? There was pond and the stream that fed it on the property. Were his clothes there? Had he gone for a swim and gotten scared, leaving his clothes behind?

“Where are your parents?”

“Mom is at home and dad is at work. It’s rare but he works on some Saturdays. I was reading in our backyard when I wandered off to play and ended up here.”

“Your parents are going to be worried about you when they go to find you and you aren’t there.”

“I know my way home. I just sat down and must have taken a nap. Where are your parents?” Tristan’s eyes were on the big house behind him. Aaron turned to look at the house as well. He knew that his parents were well off. His father made a lot of money as a lawyer and his mother had money that she’d come into the marriage with. He’d heard enough fights between them to know it all. 

“Mother is in labor. I’m getting a younger sibling. Father sent the help home. I think forgetting that there was no one to watch me. After this my sibling will be getting a nanny so I won’t be alone at home anymore. I’m five how old are you?”

“Four. I’ll be five in October.”

“I’ll be six on November second. What day were you born?”

“The ninth.” Tristan looked to the side, like his eyes were seeing something that Aaron couldn’t. His whole body kind of shuddered and then he smiled. “I’ve got to go and find my clothes.” Tristan stood up and pulled the shirt off and handed it back to Aaron. “Thank you for keeping me company.”

Tristan took off at a run into the deeper parts of the woods. Aaron listened to the crash of feet for a minute before the sound was gone. He slipped his shirt back on, the warmth from Tristan was fading fast but it was still there when he settled his arms in the sleeves. The sound of car tires on the concrete told Aaron that his dad was back. He ran into the house through the back door making sure that his father would not be able to see him. He settled onto the couch with a book in his hand. 

His father came into the house with a smile on his face and a bottle of rum in his hand. Aaron tucked his feet up onto the couch, making himself as small as possible. His father didn’t see him. Instead he moved towards his office on the second floor. Aaron followed after him and waited to get close after the door shut. 

“Yes, no. Labor went fine. I have a healthy son. Sean. I don’t know where Aaron is. Well, I don’t care where Aaron is. He’s not under foot. He’s finishing up kindergarten now. I’ll be finding a nanny for Sean and when she has the time she can care for Aaron. We don’t have the time. She’s going to be recovering from this. It was a hard birth and they’ve cautioned her to not have any more children. Well, if I find something younger, I’ll have to have that on the side. We have a prenup remember? She’d not remarry for the rest of her life so that I will have to pay for her. Yes, well my new secretary is already showing that she’s interested. It’s not like I’m going to be getting sex at home for the foreseeable future.”

Aaron moved away from his father’s office and climbed the stairs to his bedroom on the third floor. His parents’ rooms were on the second floor. Two bedrooms because while his mom had been pregnant she’d insisted on a separate room. So a second room had been set up for her, along with another bedroom turned into a sitting room. His father’s room and his office were next to each other. The master bedroom sat empty now. The room at the end of the hall on the second floor was set up as a nursery for his sibling, Sean, his mind supplied to him. Aaron’s nursery had been the room that was now his mother’s sitting room. As soon as he’d come out of the crib and slept in an actual bed, he’d been on the third floor of the house. One of the staff helped him keep his room clean. She ran the vacuum every day and helped to keep the dust out. He’d learned two years before to never have toys sitting out where his father could step on them, ever. Since then he’d always preferred to read instead of play. If he did play it was while his father was at work and he made sure to have the toys picked up long before his father got home. 

The third floor of the house also had the library in it. His mother visited the room rarely and his father never did. It was full of books that adults read and Aaron tried to read them time and again. The cook talked his mother into giving her money and she went out and bought several children’s aged books for Aaron. He never read them outside of the living room, the library, and his bedroom. When he’d finished those, he’d asked his mother for more so the cook had the weekly job of getting him books. The books were delivered before the end of school every Friday. Aaron came home to find a box sitting on his bed. When he was done with each book, he carefully placed it on the shelves in the library so that he could read it again later or in a few years, he could teach Sean to read and they could read them together. 

The sound of a slamming door had Aaron running to his bedroom. He slipped inside and ducked into his closet, pulling the door shut and grabbing his current book and gripping it to his chest. He heard his bedroom door open just two minutes later. He counted the seconds as he sat there. When he reached a minute, the door shut and then he started over at one, counting again. When he reached five minutes, Aaron clicked on the flashlight buried under the pillow he was sitting on. He lost himself in the words on the page, forgetting that he needed to eat.


	2. October 1971

Aaron was sitting in his hideaway when he heard footsteps. He cringed in fear until he realized that it wasn’t the hard footsteps of an adult but the steps of someone more his size. He looked out and saw longish brown hair. He thought for a second that he’d seen it before and then he saw a flash of skin on a small chest but there was something wrong with the size. Then the head turned and Aaron was gifted with the sight of Tristan’s face. 

Jumping to his feet, Aaron ran to him. Tristan turned and tripped over a plant, landing on his butt again. It was early in the morning and it was downright cold. What was Tristan doing out in the woods naked again? Aaron was worried so he slipped off his jacket and draped it around the boy before he could say a thing. Tristan tucked his arms into the sleeves and then stood up. He’d grown a few inches and looked older than the six months said he should have been. His hair was also longer than it should have been able to grow. He’d read a book about hair and nail growth in science class the week before. 

“Aaron, thank you for the coat.”

“Why are you naked?” Aaron asked. Tristan looked up at him shock and then smiled. 

“Do you want to know a secret?” Tristan whispered after he looked around. Aaron nodded and Tristan took a few steps closer to him. “I traveled in time to get here. When you saw me before it was my first time and I was scared. I’ve traveled a few other times since then. This is the first time I’ve gone back to the same place.”

Aaron looked at him like he was crazy for a minute, but his eyes. Tristan’s brown eyes were truthful. He knew what lying eyes looked like. He knew that his father lied to his mother over and over about his secretary and their dalliances as his mother’s driver said one day when he hadn’t known that Aaron was there. Tristan fully believed what he was saying and Aaron believed him as well.

“That’s really cool,” Aaron said and the look of relief on Tristan’s face told him the boy was happy that he believed him. Aaron grabbed his hand and pulled him over to the little hideaway that he had made. He hadn’t made the majority of it but he’d decorated it. The previous driver of his mother’s had built the area for him. It had a wooden floor that was about a foot off the ground and a step up into it. The roof was made of wood as well but the sides were only tarps that Aaron could open or close as needed. It offered little protection from the wind and snow in winter but he never kept things inside that the wet would bother and if he did, he had them on the small bookshelf that he’d asked the driver to carry out for him. It hadn’t started snowing yet so it was still safe for his books to be outside. There were bottles of water that he used to drink when he got thirsty and a metal box that had crackers and other snacks that didn’t need to be in the fridge. Tristan’s eyes widened at the sight of the little hideaway. “This is where I spend most of my time when father is home. Lately I've been out to get away from mother as well.”

“This is cool. Did you make this?” Tristan asked. 

“No. Mother’s former driver. He built it for me so that I could have a safe place to hang out all day.”

“Where is he now?”

“Father accused him of an affair with mother and fired him.” Aaron hadn’t understood what the word meant back then but he’d spent one day at school looking up the words he could remember his father using that day. The black eye he’d gotten from his father had taken weeks to heal up. Thankfully he’d fallen down and scratched up his arms and face when running away so it was easy for his teacher to believe that he fell in the woods and landed on a smooth rock.

“Oh.” Tristan seemed to deflate at that. Aaron wondered if he knew what the word meant. “I can help you with getting ties and braces set up so that in winter less snow and wind will get inside if you want.”

“What?” Aaron asked. 

“I read a book about outdoor shelter creation the other day. Mom was at work and I went with her after I got done with school. She had an evening class so I sat in the room while she lectured and I read.”

Aaron looked at him. He knew that he was smart. His teacher and the other teachers told him that all the time. He was kept busy in class so he wouldn’t cause a disruption. But he’d never even wanted to read a book like that. He had trouble following a few of the Hardy Boys books he was currently reading. 

“You must be really smart,” Aaron said and he didn’t miss it when Tristan flinched. The boy took a few steps back from him. Aaron seeing the fear on his face dropped down the ground just inside his hideaway. Tristan just eyed him. “That’s really cool. My teachers wanted to put me in second grade but father won’t allow it.”

“When I finish up kindergarten I’ll be going into the fourth grade. Mom says that I’ll be done with high school when I am twelve.”

“Wow!” Aaron smiled brightly at him. Tristan seemed to relax and moved to sit near the front, opened section of the hideaway. “So why are you naked?”

“When I travel, I only get to take my glasses with me. I don’t know why. My clothes and anything I am holding are waiting in a pile when I get back. Today I was at school waiting on mom to pick me up. I think she forgot to come and get me.”

“That’s horrible. Mother’s driver picks me up from school every day and brings me home. Sometimes if I have a good day at school, we’ll stop and I can pick up some candy. But if father is home, we don’t stop.”

“It’s only mom, dad, and me at home.”

“Father works all day and mother is busy with things so we have cleaning staff here throughout the day who take care of keeping the house clean. Sean has a nanny. Mom has a driver because she’s never learned to drive. We have a man who comes in and takes care of the landscaping around the house and keeps the woods back from the yard. I’ve never known anything else.” Aaron knew that others didn’t live like him. He could tell that on the little bit of television he watched and from the books he read but his school was filled with kids like him. Not all of the kids had staff like his house did, but the father’s all worked and the mother’s stayed at home. 

“Who watches you?”

“No one. My nanny was fired when I was three. Father said he didn’t need to pay for someone to take care of me all the time that the rest of the staff could. Well, that’s what the cook says.”

“Why don’t you call them by their names?”

“Father hates it when I do that. He gets really mad. The last time that I did, I couldn’t sit right for two days.” Aaron looked away. The staff all knew what happened in the house but said nothing. There was no way to ignore the bruises on his mother’s wrists and arms and the bruises that Aaron had on his face, usually the place his father hit him lately. The cook had explained it once that she’s signed papers that she wasn’t allowed to talk about a single thing that happened in the house. He remembered when he was four and the police had come to the house. One of the cleaning staff had been escorted out and Aaron had never seen him again. He wondered if that person had told someone something that he shouldn’t have. 

“Oh.” Tristan scooted closer, letting their legs press against each other. Aaron took the comfort. 

“I have old clothes of mine that don’t fit anymore sitting up in my room. I know that mother’s driver has a few boxes in the garage that are empty that are supposed to keep water out of things. You are so much smaller than me but that just means that the clothes won’t be too small for you. When I go back inside tonight when father gets home I’ll pick out some clothes, I’ll get them out here for you after school tomorrow.”

“How long has it been since I was last here?” Tristan asked.

“Almost six months. Just after you left, father came home last time. Mother can’t have more kids and father is upset about that. The doctors did something to her to remove her ability to have kids.”

“Probably removed all reproductive organs that can be safely removed. It’s the best method outside of not having sex for making sure a woman doesn’t become pregnant.”

Aaron looked at him in shock. Tristan seemed to notice what he was saying and stopped talking. 

“Sorry.”

“No. That was really cool. You never showed me before about making my hideaway more secure. Do you have time? How do you travel? Do you have a set time?”

“I don’t know how I travel. It’s something biological. Mom said she did it when she was young but stopped before she had me. There is no set time. I just get a really funny feeling in my stomach and then I go. The sharper the feeling the closer I am to going either to someplace or coming back from it. We have at least a little bit of time before I go back home.”

Aaron smiled and stood up; when he was to his feet he reached out a hand and pulled Tristan up with him. They spent the last few hours of the afternoon securing the tarps and setting spikes in the ground and Aaron marveled at what Tristan knew. Tristan was off in the woods trying to find a nice stick to use as a stake when Aaron heard his movement stop. He waited to listen for it to pick up again but it didn’t. Instead he moved to where the young boy had been and found just a pile of clothes in the middle of a small clearing. It must have been sudden because Tristan didn’t even call out. He sat and grabbed one of his school notebooks and made a list of things that Tristan had mentioned him needing and things he knew he needed to set out for the younger boy. He needed to make sure that he was safe for the times he came when Aaron wasn’t around. 

Tristan was his first real friend, who he could be himself around. He wanted to make sure he was safe whenever he was visiting him. He also made a note to ask him where he came from and when the next time he came. He wanted to know more about wherever he came from.


	3. November 1971

The pain was sharp and sudden. The slap was first. Pain blossoming all over the side of Aaron’s face followed by a second one to the other side of his face with the back of the same hand. He felt the split on his lip from the first slap and the ring that his father wore all the time caught the top of his cheek bone and pain flared even more. 

Eyes sought out his mother’s face and she was looking down at her meal. The cook was in the kitchen preparing the next bit of the meal so Aaron just took off running. His father didn’t even call for him to come back. It was in the middle of the afternoon but the grounds were empty as it was Thanksgiving and all the staff except cook and her helper were at their homes. He didn’t even break stride when he pushed the back door open after slamming the handle down to escape. He took a deep breath of chilled air and could smell the snow on the air. It had snowed in the night but Aaron didn’t care that he wasn’t dressed for the outdoors. His dinner jacket had been draped on the back of his chair. All he had was his thin button down shirt and a tie on his upper body. His pants were comfortable but nothing that would protect him much in the cold, biting wind. 

Aaron only slowed when he slipped into the woods. He needed to be careful; the snow was hiding patches of ice and fallen branches. He didn’t want to fall and hurt himself. While it was still afternoon, the clouds above, full of snow, darkened the sky to where creepy things were at the edge of Aaron’s vision as he walked. The creepy things that went bump in the night and that scared other kids his age and older didn’t scare him. What scared him was the smell of rum and a hand grabbing him in the dark. The sound of bare feet stomping down the hall and shoed feet clacking on the hardwood of the house. He’d learned what true fear was and it didn’t come from hidden monsters.

The hideaway was in sight and Aaron sighed. His father had yet to find it. The green tarps and heavy plant growth around the area helped to hide it from prying eyes. His father also never came into the woods. He sighed in relief as he slid in between the two pieces of tarp that formed the door. The lantern was already lit and Aaron saw floppy brown hair, glasses, and one of Aaron’s own shirts on the boy before he threw himself onto Tristan. He could tell that Tristan was older. He’s bigger. Closer to Aaron’s own size. Tristan’s arms settled around him hesitantly and he buried his face in the black t-shirt that Tristan was borrowing. A hand started to rub up and down his back in a calming gesture. Aaron burrowed closer and just breathed. There was an odd scent on Tristan. He inhaled. He smelled almost sweet and musky. Aaron had smelled it once before at school when it had been hot during September and he’d been playing in the small sand box before he figured out that he didn’t like that the sand got everywhere. 

Tristan didn’t say a thing, just sat there with Aaron draped all over him and his hand moving up and down his back. Aaron knew that he needed to tell Tristan what was wrong but he couldn’t. 

“I was reading your book. Do you want me to read to you where you left off from?” 

Aaron nodded his head and felt Tristan shift a little. It wasn’t long before the turning of pages sounded and then Tristan’s soft voice started to speak. His voice was steady and constant. It carried Aaron away from where he was. He let himself get lost in the story in a way that he never could when he read it. There was something about someone else reading to him that he hadn’t realized he missed. His nanny used to read to him, but Sean’s nanny had little time for him outside of making sure that he ate dinner at night when his father worked late and his mother had dinner with friends. He wanted to go home with Tristan. He wanted to leave his house and never come back but he couldn’t leave Sean and he knew that he had no way of caring for his infant brother so he stayed. He stayed to protect him. 

It was full dark by the time that Tristan had finished reading the book out loud to Aaron. He’d stopped to take sips of water but Aaron was shocked that the boy still had a voice. 

“I read to mom a lot so I am good at reading for long periods. You are a lot more dressed up than you normally are.”

“It’s Thanksgiving.”

“Oh. It’s not Thanksgiving at home.”

“When is home for you?”

“I’d better not tell you that. Just to be safe. It’s in your future. I found the paper you have out here. I’m not even born yet!” Tristan exclaimed. Aaron looked up at his friend and found that he looked older than what he’d thought. 

“How old are you?”

“Nine. You don’t look much older than the last time I was here.”

“No. That was last month.”

“Do you want me to clean your lip?” Tristan’s finger reached out and touched his chin, just below the cut. Aaron nodded and pointed at the bookshelf where he had brought a few things from the medicine cabinet in his mother’s room when he’d been able to sneak in there. Tristan moved over to that side of the room and grabbed the things. Aaron also noticed then that Tristan had covered them up with the blanket he kept in another box that kept water out. He sighed and pulled the blanket closer around him. 

Tristan was careful but Aaron still hissed when the cut was cleaned. When a finger skirted the edge of what was going to be a wonderful shiner the next morning, he nodded. His mother’s driver had poked at his black eyes before to make sure that nothing was broken. Tristan’s fingers were soft and gentle until he found the worst impact point and he pressed. Stars filled his eyes and the pain flared again. 

“Whatever he hit you with cut your face as well. I’m going to clean it up and put a strip of the tape on it to keep it closed. Tell me if I hurt you too much.”

Aaron kept his mouth shut because whatever pain he got was less than the act that had put the cut there, and Tristan was helping him, not hurting him. His mother had never cared for him like this. Usually it was Sean’s nanny if the cook wasn’t there. They were never gentle like his friend was being. He figured that they didn’t try and care because caring would get them fired. This was the first time his father had struck his face in a while. Other than a slap to his cheek. Now that he was in school, coming in with mark after mark would raise questions, his father was more than likely to strike his chest or stomach. 

“Did this happen at dinner?” Tristan asked when he pulled away from Aaron. There was a care to the way that his friend moved that told Aaron that he was afraid to startle him. He let Tristan clean up the gauze and strips of tape before he spoke.

“Yes. Father was upset that I asked to go on a trip with one of my school friends. They are going to DC for a few days over Christmas Break and want me to come. He asked me why I thought I should be allowed to go and I said that I was doing well in school and that I wouldn’t want anything else for Christmas.”

“Oh.” Tristan slipped under the blanket with him again and Aaron could feel that the boy was cold even with the jacket and the long sleeve shirt and sweatpants on. Aaron snuggled in close and Tristan pulled him even closer. “Dad’s working late and mom is not around right now.”

Aaron wanted to ask what that meant but he didn’t think that it would be a good idea. He thought about how he never told anyone about what his father was doing. He wondered if Tristan’s mother was just as bad as his father. If she struck him instead of loving him. He’d realized when he’d started kindergarten that children were taught that parents loved them no matter what but Aaron didn’t believe that. If his father loved him, he wouldn’t be hitting him. If his father loved his mother he wouldn’t hit her or spend more time with his secretary than her. 

“Mom is sick. She’s really sick today. I am kind of happy to be here.”

“Promise me that you’ll always be my friend, Tristan,” Aaron asked as he turned to look the--this time--older boy in the face. Tristan smiled at him and nodded. 

“I promise. I’ve come here a lot in my stretch of time. I’ll always come back here. Mom says that she used to always go back to places that made her feel safe. If I am coming here, I feel safe here. Don’t you worry. I’ll be back again and again. You won’t get rid of me!”

Aaron turned back to where they were side by side. Tristan looped his hand around his shoulder and pulled him in tight. When his stomach growled some time later, Aaron grinned and blushed. 

“I’m going to go in and sneak us out some turkey and things. Stay here.”

Aaron slipped out of the hideaway and snuck back up to the house. He found his father passed out at the dinner table with a half empty bottle of rum sitting beside him. The food had been cleared. He couldn’t hear his mother but he didn’t worry about finding her. If his father was down here she was safe. The kitchen was spotless but there was a plate of food made up for him in the fridge. Aaron quickly added a little more of everything to it and popped into the microwave oven. He grabbed a bowl and filled it with cranberry salad while the food warmed up. He stuck forks in his back pocket and grabbed two napkins and stuffed those into his front pocket. The microwave oven was getting closer and instead of making noise, Aaron turned it off before it could. When he had all the food gathered into his hands he set out quietly to get back to Tristan. 

Tristan was waiting to open the flap for him and Aaron set down the food on the floor and settled in. Instead of the blanket going around the front of them like it had before, Tristan wrapped it around their back so they could eat. Silence filled the hideaway as the boys ate until the plate was clean. 

“Want to see me leave?” Tristan asked. 

Aaron nodded his head and turned fully to look at Tristan as he got a weird look on his face and then was just gone. He’d faded slowly but he was still gone in just seconds. Aaron stared until he started to yawn as the adrenalin of his friend being there was fading. 

When Aaron woke up the next morning, he realized that he’d slept nearly the entire night. He also noticed that his room had a funny scent to it. Almost earthy but with a tinge of something he only smelled when he was in his father’s office when he was showing him his guns. Gun oil and the smell of a recently fired gun. He pushed the thoughts away as he thought about what he was going to do with his day.


	4. December 1971

Sean’s new nanny was living in Virginia and taking a few morning classes at college so she moved into the house and went in with Aaron’s father to work in the mornings and came back by bus in the afternoons when his mother would then take care of her things. Aaron had wanted to get close to her. She was a lot of fun for the first week but after that she was wholly interested in two things: taking care of Sean and trying to catch the attention of his father. That was when Aaron realized what a home wrecker she was. He’s heard one of the other mothers at school talk about her husband’s secretary that way. 

Aaron realized the day that he came home from school early because of the holiday time that his mother didn’t care that his father was being with people other than her. She was off at her functions, or parties, or spending time with Sean. Aaron had learned how to move about the house silently. He heard more that way. Both of his parents were in his father’s office and they were not being quiet at all.

“You can’t take the nanny with you. I have too many parties and functions that I have to be at to take care of Sean. Take your secretary.”

Aaron slipped past the door so that he couldn’t hear what his father said to that. The nanny was down there with Sean in her arms, bouncing him. Aaron kissed his cheek and then moved to the back stairs that would take him out near the library. He slipped his backpack onto the table so that he could work on his homework before he grabbed books and slipped back down the stairs. He was out the door and trudging through the snow as quickly as he could go. He followed the groundskeeper’s tracks to the edge of the woods so that no one could find him. When he got to his hideaway and found that Tristan hadn’t been there at all that day, he slumped down into the pile of blankets he’d stolen from the trash piles as his mother had decided to change the décor and theme of the house so all the bedding went from shades of red to shades of green. The cook had seen him slipping away with them and had sent his mother’s driver to help him. 

A week after that, a new lantern had appeared in the hideaway and his stock of fuel was filled whenever it got to half. The hideaway was now warm and bright, especially with the pile of blankets. He wanted to show Tristan, but the boy hadn’t been seen by Aaron since Thanksgiving Day. Even on the bad days, Aaron checked the hideaway. Today wasn’t that bad, the wind wasn’t blowing much and the snow was holding off some. 

When it came time for dinner that night, Aaron slipped back inside to find that his mother was eating in her rooms and that his dad had already left for his trip. The cook had mentioned that his father wouldn't be back until the first week of January. The nanny was upset about getting left behind but Aaron just stayed away from her as much as he could. 

The days of his Christmas Break were filled with working on homework when he woke up until he got tired of it and then reading as much as he wanted throughout the day. The books that were left in his room over the past month had been nearly tripled in preparation of him being stuck inside for most of the winter. 

Christmas Day rolled around and Aaron was excited for it. His mom was spending the afternoon and evening flitting to and from parties while the nanny was keeping Sean in her rooms while she watched TV. Aaron had the run of the house as only the cook was staying in the house. He spent the morning in the library reading.

After a lunch snack, Aaron moved up to his bedroom where he looked out and saw a flash of movement in the woods. Crying out in happiness, he ran from his bedroom down the back stairs and out into the snow, barely stopping to put on shoes and a coat. The snow crunched under his feet as he neared the hideaway and found Tristan curled up in the nest of blankets. The boy looked up at him and Aaron saw that he’d found the clothes. He looked younger than he had the last time. 

“How old are you this time?”

“Six. You look to be six as well.”

“I am. What day is it?”

“CHRISTMAS!” Aaron yelled as he hugged Tristan tight, half lying on top of him in the blankets. Tristan laughed. “Dad is gone on a trip and mom isn’t home, it’s just the nanny, Sean, me, and the cook. Come inside and we can read all day long.” 

Tristan nodded his agreement but before Aaron pulled him out he showed him how to work the new lantern and where the driver kept the fuel. They talked for a few minutes before Aaron finally pulled him towards the house. Tristan’s eyes grew wide as he looked at the house. They snuck up the back stair case on the off chance that the nanny was up and about. 

“This is the library,” Aaron said as he threw open the library doors. Tristan entered, his eyes wide with shock. Aaron knew that their library was large. His father collected books even though he rarely read any of them. He’d told him once that he did it to look more intelligent to clients and other lawyers. 

Tristan’s eyes roved over the books with an eye that Aaron had seen the cook use when looking at the cabinets to see what was needed to made dinner. His eyes were taking in every single book. 

“Your father is a liar,” Tristan said. His gaze never left the books and Aaron just looked at him in shock until the boy figured out what he had said. He turned to Aaron then and looked at him with fear in his eyes. “I mean…I’m…I’m sorry. I’ll go.” Tristan was almost to the door when Aaron grabbed his arm. Tristan hissed and jerked his hand free and Aaron let him go.

“No. Don’t. I just have never hear someone call him that.”

“His books, there is no rhyme or reason to them. He collects books for the sake of collecting books. Fiction and non-fiction are beside each other on the shelf. Historical and contemporary. The books are beautiful but this is not the collection of a man who loves books for the words inside of them. They are a thing to him.”

“You sound a lot older than you look,” Aaron said, dumbfounded.

“Mom teaches literature. She’s read these kinds of books to me since I can remember. I know books.” Tristan smiled as he ran his hand down a book about King Arthur. Aaron saw the leather-bound note book on the table in the middle of the room where his homework was spread around. He walked over and grabbed it, bringing it back and handing it to Tristan. 

“It’s not much of a present but what you can do is write down all the books you want to read and can’t get at home and I can buy them. My father doesn’t limit the books I buy and the staff goes and gets them for me. I can slip some of yours in each week and then you will have things to read that you want to read. I can bring them out. Mom’s driver found me a big chest that’s air and water tight. He’s going to take it out to the hideaway when he can and set it up. I can fit the blankets and the clothes and books inside of it for you!” 

“That’ll be nice for the trips where I end up here and you are in school. Thank you!” Tristan pulled in him for a hug. 

Aaron and Tristan spent the rest of the boy’s visit there reading and talking about books that they had read. Aaron had a list of books that he wanted bought just so that he could talk about them with Tristan. He realized as they talked that there wasn’t a lot of books that Tristan had read that he had. He hadn’t thought they were that different but Tristan seemed to like older books and nonfiction while Aaron liked the mystery solving novels. 

It wasn’t until after Tristan had disappeared that Aaron remembered the way that the boy had hissed in pain when he had grabbed him. He’d said before that his mom was sick. Had he been hurt by her? He really hoped not. Tristan was too good to have a life like he did.


	5. May 1973

It was a nice day out and Sean had a bit of a cold and the nanny was taking a nap as Sean had kept her up all night so Aaron was sitting in his mother’s sitting room with Sean in the bassinet beside him. From where he was he could see outside, and believe that he was outside, but yet stay inside and help take care of Sean. His father was at work while his mom was out shopping. 

Aaron knew that it was crazy but when he was home, he was always looking for Tristan. He’d only seen the boy twice since Christmas but he knew that he’d been there more than that based on the books that had been read. He was also fairly certain that Tristan was very smart. Smarter than he was trying to act around him but since he didn’t like to bring it up, Aaron wasn’t going to either. 

Secrets. Aaron understood secrets better than most. 

Movement along the edge of the woods alerted Aaron that they weren’t alone. The groundskeeper was long gone for the day, usually starting before the sun came up. He kept an eye on the movement until he saw the long brown hair. Checking on Sean who was still asleep, Aaron ran into the house proper to make it out into the backyard. Tristan was sitting with a book in his lap ten feet into the woods, leaning against a tree. 

“Tristan!” Aaron called out as he breached the woods. The boy looked up and Aaron stopped in his tracks. He had a black eye. Tristan had a black eye that looked like it was only about a day old. His face was still swollen and the bruise was getting to its darkest. He dropped to knees in front of the boy. Without realizing it, he reached out and only stopped when Tristan jerked back from him. 

“I’m inside today. Only the nanny is home right now. Why don’t you come too?” Aaron held out his hand as he stood up. Tristan reached out and Aaron pulled. He was so small. He looked smaller than he had been that first time but he knew that he wasn’t. When they got inside, Aaron pushed him into the sitting room and then moved to the kitchen. He found the food in the fridge and reheated a plate of it for himself as well as grabbed a sandwich. He’d let Tristan choose whichever he wanted. When the microwave oven beeped Aaron carefully pulled the food out, careful not to burn himself and then set off into the sitting room. He set the plate down and then went back for the sandwich and drinks. He found milk in the fridge and poured two glasses before heading back to the sitting room trying not to drop it all. 

Tristan was sitting in the chair farthest from Sean, his feet tucked up onto his chair and his head resting on his knees. He’d drug the shirt that he was swimming in over his legs so that he looked like he was wearing a dress. Aaron smiled at the image and then set down the drinks and food.

“Sandwich or chicken and potatoes?”

“What’s on the sandwich?” Tristan peeked his head up to look at the plate.

“Turkey, lettuce, tomato, and some kind of weird cheese that tastes good but I don’t know the name of it.” 

“Sandwich.” Tristan got up long enough to grab the plate and then sat back down, slipping the shirt on like he had before. That’s when Aaron noticed that he wasn’t wearing pants at all. Tristan’s eyes rose up and met his and followed the gaze to his own legs. “None of the pants would stay up. So I picked the longest shirt so that I could at least be covered. I figured since there were several sizes of clothes that you had set it all up for me. The books were nice as well.”

“I keep them out there for me to read when I am hiding from the house.” Aaron didn’t want to mention that it was a gift of sorts for a near two year older Tristan. He thought about how he was meeting Tristan all out of order and he had probably better start to write down at least when the visits happen and how old Tristan is so that he can keep track when he gets older. “Have you met an older me?”

“I don’t think that I should answer that. I’ve not been traveling long and I don’t know if I can actually ruin anything yet.” Tristan took a bite of the sandwich and smiled after he swallowed the first bite. “It’s muenster cheese. I love it!” Tristan ate like he hadn’t eaten in days. 

Aaron watched him and watched as he eyed Sean. The infant was still asleep which Aaron was thankful for because when he was awake all he did was cry. He was sick and Aaron understood that but Sean didn’t settle for anyone except the nanny and his mother. He had an hour before he was to go and wake up the nanny. “Sean’s feeling bad and the nanny is taking a nap as he kept her up all night long. I told her I would watch over him while she sleeps.”

“I’ve not been around a baby before. I mainly spend time with mom, dad, and some of mom’s college students. We have fun talking literature.”

“What happened?” Aaron asked.

Tristan didn’t answer at first, he just looked outside where it was starting to rain a little. “I was reading on the playground at school. I try not to talk too much during class. It just draws the bullies but when we were doing independent things, I asked the teacher a few things and one of the kids didn’t like me showing off. This was a reminder that no one likes freaks.”

“Tristan!” Aaron said. He didn’t like that he’d called himself a freak. He was glad it wasn’t Tristan’s dad who put the mark on his son’s face and he was really happy that his mom hadn’t done it while she was sick. 

“Don’t worry. That’s what he said. I’m not a freak. Just because I am smarter than him doesn’t make me a freak. Dad saw the black eye first and demanded to know what happened with the school. They passed it off as boys playing but dad he…he threatened to sue if the whole truth wasn’t found out. Seems that the kid likes to bully others. Especially trying to talk girls into doing things they shouldn’t. Dad wouldn’t explain that but I am sure that it’s not good.” 

“I am sure that it’s not. What happened to the boy?”

“Gone. His parents pulled him when it was found out that he was hurting girls.” Tristan finished off the sandwich and leaned forward to slip the plate onto the table. Aaron scooted the glass of milk over closer and Tristan grabbed it next. He drank half of it in one go. “I really like milk. Mom says I’d drink a gallon a day if she let me.”

“It’ll help you grow big and strong,” Aaron said, causing Tristan to start laughing. 

“Neither of my parents is exactly in the big category. I’m going to be skinny forever. I might get tall though. Mom is six foot tall. Dad is five foot ten. The pictures I have seen of various other close relatives tells me that if I am under dad’s height, there is something wrong.”

Aaron giggled at Tristan’s words. The boy though just cocked his head and looked at him with a questioning look on his face which set Aaron off giggling more. Movement sounded in the halls and Tristan set his glass down right next to Aaron’s and ducked under one of the tables that held plants. The skirt on the table brushed the floor. Aaron grabbed a book and opened it up to a random page. He flipped the page as the nanny entered the room and started laughing again. 

“Good book?” the nanny asked as she touched Sean’s cheek and then moved to pick him up. 

“Very good. Very funny,” Aaron answered not looking up from the book. 

“Sean’s fever isn’t going down like I would like so I’m taking him to his doctor. I’ve already talked to you mother, she called from one of the stores to check up on him. Are you going to be good?” The nanny looked down at him with a frown on her face. Aaron could feel her stare and only then did he look up. 

“I’ve already eaten the lunch that the cook left for me. If you are not back by dinner, I’m sure that there is something in the fridge if I get hungry before she comes back and has dinner ready. I’ll be fine. Take care of Sean.” Aaron went back to his book and the nanny carried Sean out of the room a few seconds later. She stopped at the closet and pulled out a light coat and then she was gone. “It’s clear.”

“I’m glad that she’s not your nanny.”

“So am I. What do you want to do now?”

“Can we just sit here and read?” Tristan asked. 

“I’ve got a better idea. Mother bought new furniture for the library and one of them is a big chair. We can both sit in it.” Aaron grabbed his milk and finished it off, prompting Tristan to do the same. They carried their dishes to the kitchen and set them beside the sink. “Cook will get them when she gets here.”

“Okay. I’ve never just left dishes sit before. Mom always likes me to rinse them off.”

“It’s fine.” Aaron pulled Tristan after him up into the library. He pushed the younger boy down into the chair and then moved to grab a book from the small shelf of the books he was reading. There was a quilt draped over the back of the chair. When he was settled he pulled it over the both of them, tucking them both in a little so that they could stay warm. Tristan snuggled down into his side, keeping his black eye and swollen cheek from touching Aaron. He found the first page and started to read. It didn’t take long for Tristan to slip off into sleep but Aaron kept reading after that. 

An hour later, Aaron felt the weight at his side disappear and he looked to see just blanket in his gaze. He hoped that Tristan appeared where he started safely and that he woke up.


	6. February 1974

Aaron was in pain. He hated being in pain but lately his father was more violent to him than normal. His mother was out and about in the town, spreading their name and getting father cases and his father never touched the staff, outside of the nanny but that was something really different. So, Aaron had become his full time punching bag. The only escape that he had was school and when he was able to sneak away to his hideaway on the weekends. Today was Thursday and he had the rest of the day to himself. His mother and father had a dinner planned at one of his father’s partner’s residences. He hoped that they stayed out late and he was able to slip into bed and be asleep by the time that his father got home. It would be better for him. His face hurt and no amount of ice was able to dull the pain enough. The cook was off and the nanny had taken Sean out to a playdate with a friend. The only person left in the house was one of the cleaning staff and she would never get him pain medication. His father had taken to locking it in a cabinet in his office and the pills that his mother had in her medicine cabinet were not ones that he could or even would take. He saw how out of it his mother got after she took them and he didn’t want to be that vulnerable. 

The sound of footsteps in the woods told Aaron that he wasn’t alone anymore. He pulled the blankets around him more. He had the tarp door open so that he could see. The footsteps were heavy and told Aaron that it wasn’t Tristan. He braced himself to take off running if he needed to when a man broke through the bush to the left. The man stopped and stared at Aaron as Aaron stared at him. He knew the sight that he had to be. His face had to be turning black and blue and he knew that his nose had bled a lot but the only thing that he had cared about was making a run for it and getting away from his father. The man was dressed in a pair of tan pants and a button up shirt with a sweater vest over top of it. His tie was loose at his throat but other than that he looked neat and groomed. His hair was a little weird looking, it was near stiff as a board. Aaron didn’t like it.

“Keep glaring like that and your face will keep that look for the rest of your life, Aaron,” the man said as he slipped a messenger bag off his shoulder and set it down just inside the tarp. He crouched and ducked into the hideaway, pulling the tarp closed as he did. Not bothering the blankets that Aaron was wrapped up in, the man moved over to where the rest of the blankets were. He pulled out two, folding one up and setting it down on the ground and wrapping the other around himself. His hand went back into the box and pulled out a book. Aaron read the title _Empty Planet_. When he had the book fully in hand the man sat down on the blanket and opened the book to where Tristan had last left off. His finger hovered over the exact line that he’d been reading aloud when he’d disappeared. 

“Tristan?” Aaron asked. He looked up into the eyes looking down at him and he knew it was true. It was Tristan’s eyes. Soft and caring and looking like he wanted to care for Aaron.

“Of course. Do you have any supplies out here with you?” Tristan reached out with his hand, just stopping short of actually touching his face. 

Aaron couldn’t take his eyes off of Tristan’s face but the man quickly reached over and pulled out gauze and the peroxide. The larger hands were just as gentle as the smaller hands always were. Except that he felt wholly safe with the hands touching him. He took the warmth from the hand that cupped his cheek to hold him still as his bloody nose was cleaned up and the cuts on his face were cleaned as well. He closed his eyes as he felt cared for in a way that he never had before. It felt wonderful and he wanted Tristan to take him with him. He knew that he couldn’t. He knew that but the dark moments before he could get his emotions under control were always the hardest. 

“No pain medicine?” Tristan asked as he dropped another bit of gauze down to the floor. 

“Father keeps it all locked in his office. Mother has some but even in small doses, it’s too much for me. I can’t be that vulnerable.”

“I think that I’m going to be here a while. Why don’t I slip away and get some for you? You can keep it here.”

“Don’t leave me!” Aaron begged and wrapped his arms around Tristan’s chest to try and keep him there. 

“Aaron, I need to get something for you. I’ll come back. If I feel like I am going to leave before I get back, I’ll fight it until I can get you what you need.” Tristan’s hands tilted his face up and forced him to look the older man in the eyes. “I’ll always protect you however I can. I promise but that also means doing things you don’t like.”

“How are you going to pay for it?” Aaron asked, trying to find a way to stop him from leaving. He trusted that he would come back but he didn’t want to be alone and if he went with him, someone would stop them. Everyone in the area knew him. 

Tristan laughed and dropped his hands from Tristan’s face to lean over and grab his bag. He pulled out a wallet and opened it. He pulled out money from inside of it. There were two kinds of bills, ones that looked like the ones that Aaron knew and ones that looked very different.

“I know how to get a hold of things that I need in any time I land in. You worry about staying here and keeping warm. I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Tristan pulled away from him then and moved out of the hideaway. Aaron watched him as he set the tarp to open again and then moved in the direction that was away from the house. 

Aaron sat and waited. He had no clock out with him and so he didn’t know how much time had passed. He wanted to know exactly how long Tristan would be gone. He sat and watched, listening as hard as he could for any sign of him. He’d almost given up when he heard someone moving through the woods in the direction that Tristan had gone. When he saw the man clearly, he saw that he not only had a bag with him from the gas station a few blocks away but there were two cups in his hand. Aaron scrambled up to take the cups so that Tristan could duck into the hideaway. He smelled coffee and chocolate coming out of the cups. Aaron sat back down into his nest of blankets and waited for Tristan to finish pulling things out of the bag and setting them on the shelf. Then he pulled out a small weird looking box. 

The box had a hinged lid and Tristan opened it up and started to fill it with all the things he’d bought as well as all of the other supplies that Aaron had outside to help take care of himself. 

“There, you have a fully stocked medical kit now.” Tristan dropped back down beside him and took one of the cups, sipping at it and closing his eyes in happiness. “Yours is hot chocolate. No coffee for you because it’ll keep you up all night long.”

Aaron took a hesitant sip and found that it was the perfect temperature for drinking. He smiled at Tristan and that’s when he saw the pill in his hand. He took the pill and swallowed it with a healthy drink of his hot chocolate. 

“Why don’t we settle down and read? I’m sure that you’ll feel better when the pill starts to work on you.” Tristan raised up his arm and Aaron tucked himself into his side. He was warmer than his smaller, younger self usually was. 

Tristan started to read and Aaron lost himself in the world of the words’s making. He closed his eyes and sighed as he lost all meaning of time. Tristan’s voice was calm and easy and while there was a great deal of differences in the tone and the sound, he knew that it was Tristan.

Aaron opened his eyes, unaware that he’d fallen asleep. He looked around expecting to be alone in the hideaway but he found himself in his bedroom. The door was locked from the inside like he did every night but he didn’t remember walking up into the house. He was alarmed for a few seconds as he wondered if Tristan had bought the wrong kind of medicine for him. He sat up in bed and hissed when he moved his cheek and pain flared on his face. He slipped a little on the bed and his hand slid under his pillow, hitting something hard. He ripped the pillow up and found a book there. It was a soft cover book with the title of Self First Aid Care. He looked down to see that the author was Doctor Spencer Reid. He opened the cover of the book and found a message from Tristan. 

_You were asleep and I didn’t want to leave you outside so I carried you in and laid you down. I waited to fade so that the door could stay locked. Keep this book safe. I bought it just for you._

Aaron looked through the first few pages and saw that the publication date was two thousand and four. Thirty years in the future! Aaron wondered how he had gotten the book back with him. He looked around the room but didn’t see any clothes lying around. He thought about the weird money in the wallet. Tristan had figured out how to take things back with him as an adult! He’d have to ask adult Tristan about that the next time that he saw him. He wondered if it was something that he developed as he got older or if there was a trick that younger Tristan hadn’t figured out yet. He tucked the book back under his pillow so that he could slip it outside the first chance he got. He didn’t want his father to find it, or the cleaning staff. 

Laying back down and covering himself up, Aaron wondered about older Tristan’s life. What was he doing? Where did he work? Had the bullies gotten better? Where was Aaron in his life? He fell asleep thinking of all the things he wanted to ask the next time that he saw him.


	7. August 1975

Aaron was wandering around the woods behind the house. The summer thunderstorms had knocked down quite a few trees and he was having fun seeing what had changed in his domain. His father had paid for a fence to go up around the entire property over the summer. Aaron liked knowing exactly where the property line was. Thankfully his hideaway had not been found by the crew that put in the fence or if they did find it, his father was not aware of it. 

“Hello, Aaron!” Tristan called out. Aaron turned to where the boy was. He hadn’t been there two seconds before. Tristan was smiling and waving at him and Aaron couldn’t help but smile back with just as bright a smile. 

“Tristan!” Aaron stepped up and hugged his friend. Tristan gave him a weird look. “I bought you a present!”

“Aaron slow down!” Tristan called as Aaron pulled him towards their hideaway. Aaron looked back to see that he was going too fast for Tristan’s gangly legs to keep up. He dropped his friend’s hand and slowed down. Tristan kept up with him the rest of the way to their hideaway. The second he broke through the tarps Aaron dropped down beside the box that held the blankets and books. He grabbed the swimming shorts that he’d snuck into the purchase when Sean’s nanny had taken him shopping for clothes. There were a few pairs of them. He’d gotten smaller ones for when Tristan was four and ones that looked like they would fit him when he was six and when he was nine. He figured the other ages would be able to fit into one of the three pairs, even if they had to be tied tightly. 

“Swimming shorts?” Tristan asked as he held up the pair that Aaron thought were going to fit him at his current age. “We can go swimming today?”

“There is a pond in the middle of the property. We can swim and do whatever we want today. Father is away for work and mother took a trip as well. Sean and his nanny are out for the day. The only staff still on hand is the groundskeeper and he told me he was going to stay out of the woods today.”

Tristan smiled even brighter and slipped the shorts on. Aaron grabbed the two towels that he’d snuck out of the house. He handed the younger boy a purple one and he kept the blue one. When he was sure they were ready, he walked out of the hideaway and made sure that Tristan knew the way to the pond. It was easy to get to. Aaron always just walked until he found the stream and then followed it. Tristan dropped his towel down to the ground and moved to the edge of the water. He dipped his toes in and smiled. 

“It’s warm!” Tristan dove right in, shocking Aaron. He watched as his friend swam out into the deeper area of the pond and then ducked under the water. It wasn’t until he came up on the far side that Aaron even thought to start to change into his swimming shorts. He dove into the water once he was changed and took off towards where his friend was. 

Tristan was an awesome swimmer, Aaron thought as he watched him. His thinner body was perfect for it. The only time they were out of the water was when Aaron went back into the house to get food for them for lunch. While they were waiting for their food to digest enough to where they wouldn’t get sick, Tristan told him all about the various aquatic life that could be found in the pond given where they were. Aaron was shocked that he knew that. 

“I like to read and when I figured out exactly where you lived, I started to learn as much as I could about the area. Like what plant life I can eat during summer so I’m not snacking on the crackers and stuff you have in there unless I want to. This land has a lot of wild bushes growing on it. It’s really great.”

“Wow. That’s really great. Maybe next summer you can show me all of that!” 

“Sure.”

Back into the water they went until dinner time. Aaron went in and had dinner with his mother and father but had the cook sneak him a sandwich. He figured that she knew he was feeding someone else because she snuck him two bottles of pop as well. They were too tired so Tristan ate dinner in the hideaway with the tarps all open so the breeze could reach them. He’d stayed in the swimming shorts and was smiling, despite the sunburn on his skin. Aaron made a decision that he needed to get some sunblock the next time he went to the store with the staff, or just ask the driver or nanny to pick him up some. 

Tristan was reading a book on mathematics that Aaron had found in a yard sale down the block a few weeks before. He’d heard Tristan mention that he liked math and had bought it. Aaron was working his way through the Nancy Drew books, having finally run out of Hardy Boys stories and a few others series. 

Aaron stayed outside until he heard the nanny calling for him at the edge of the woods.

“Stay here. I’ll be back as soon as I can. We can sleep out here tonight, together.”

“Okay,” Tristan agreed. He was laying down on a blanket with the book now resting on his chest as he looked at Aaron. Aaron made sure that Tristan knew to stay and then he took off for the house. He jumped into the bath and washed up without a fight and was snug in his bed long before his normal bedtime. He was tired but he wanted to sleep outside. He just had to make the nanny and his mother think that he was asleep. They were creatures of habit. His mother always checked on him first followed by the nanny half an hour later. Sean was four and gave the nanny a run for her money so she checked on him even earlier that day. When the door shut, Aaron jumped up from bed and changed into the sweatpants that he’d laid out at the foot of his bed. 

Aaron crept out of his room and down the back stairs. When he hit the landing for the second floor, he paused. He listened and didn’t hear a thing so he kept going down and slipped out one of the side doors that he kept oiled so that it wouldn’t squeak when he came in and out of it. He skirted the far side of the property and once he was far enough in the woods, he dashed across to head right where he wanted to go. 

Tristan was exactly as Aaron had left him. Lying on a blanket with the book on his chest. The only difference was that he was fast asleep. Aaron crept forward and plucked his glasses from his face and set them off to the side on a shelf for safety. He picked up the book next and set it back into the box where it belonged and covered up his friend. He settled down on the blanket next to him and scooted as close as he could. It wasn't going to be cold out as it was still summer but Tristan was only wearing a pair of shorts and Aaron didn’t want him to get cold. 

As he laid there listening to Tristan breathe, Aaron figured that he had probably better get a sleeping bag for him, just in case since the weather was going to be turning cold again. The blankets were nice but he’d be warmer with a sleeping bag. 

Just as he was slipping fully into sleep, Tristan rolled over and laid his head on Aaron’s shoulder. He curled into his side and draped an arm over his chest. Aaron froze but Tristan didn’t move again. Aaron had never slept in the same bed as anyone and he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. He settled down again pretty easily. Tristan’s scent was calming and the breathing was nice. As he finally drifted off, he thought about how nice it would be to have Tristan there all the time and that they could sleep outside together all the time as well.


	8. June 1976

Aaron waved at the cook as she drove away to do the shopping for him and her for the week. His father and Sean were away for a trip to Maine while his mother had taken a trip to New York. It hadn’t been until after his mother had left that anyone realized that no one was there to take care of Aaron. Quick calls and the new cook was taking over as his caretaker for the week. The old cook had retired as she was getting too old and wanted to go and live near her children and their kids in Georgia. He wasn’t sure if he liked the new cook yet. The groundskeeper was gone for the day and the cleaning staff was taking a few days break since the house was pretty much empty. 

“Aaron?” Tristan’s quiet voice asked from behind him. 

Aaron turned to find a four year old Tristan standing there with one of Aaron’s too large shirts on but he could just see the edge of swimming shorts underneath. 

“Want to go swimming?” Aaron asked. He was shocked when Tristan’s eyes widened in what looked like fear and he shook his head no as quick as he could. Aaron turned to see if anyone was behind him but there wasn’t anyone there. “What’s wrong?”

“Don’t know how to swim.”

Aaron just looked at him in shock. He thought back to the Tristan’s that he’d swam with. He’d never swam with one that was under the age of five. Sean had been taught by the nanny over various trips to the local pool. Aaron had been taught when the groundskeeper had shown him the pond years ago. 

“I can teach you!” Aaron said.

Tristan looked up at him in shock but nodded his agreement. Their first stop had to be the hideaway because they needed towels and the sunblock that Aaron had made sure had been picked up when someone had gone shopping early in spring. No one had questioned its purchase and Aaron had been happy about it. 

It didn’t take long for Aaron to learn that Tristan learned things at a very fast pace. The younger boy had admitted to learning the mechanics of swimming from a book but hadn’t put theory into practice yet.

“Mom thinks that the only muscle that I need to grow is that of my brain. Dad wants me to play t-ball but I don’t want to,” Tristan admitted while lying on the grass at the edge of the pond. Aaron wasn’t that shocked. He knew enough about Tristan’s home life to understand that intelligence was valued. While it was a good thing, he needed to be active as well. 

“Do you know how to ride a bike?” Aaron asked. Another shake of the head and Aaron thought about how he could teach him. Then he remembered that Sean had gotten a bike for his birthday. “Sean got a bike. If we wait until the cook is done with dinner I can show you how to ride a bike as well.”

“Really?” Tristan looked so happy that Aaron wanted to show him then but he knew that he needed to wait. He didn’t want the cook telling his mother or his father about his friend. 

Dinner was quick, in and out and Aaron even helped by clearing his dishes and he and Tristan waited in the bushes at the edge of the woods until the kitchen light went out and the cook went up to the room she was using until one of Aaron’s parents got home. 

Tristan took to riding a bike even quicker than he had swimming and Aaron had a lot of fun teaching him how to ride it. When he was sure that he had a grip on it, Aaron found his own bike in the back of the garage and they rode around the neighborhood until they couldn’t see around them anymore. 

After they put up the bikes, Aaron snuck Tristan into the house. They settled in the library, Tristan eyeing some of his dad’s law books but going for the newer fiction instead. They settled into the chair, sides pressed against each other. Aaron kept looking at the boy expecting him to leave at any second. Instead he was still there. Finally, Aaron found that Tristan was asleep.

Putting their books on the end table to his left, Aaron then shifted to pick up Tristan and carry him to his bedroom. He settled the boy down and then changed. He got into bed, pushing Tristan to the edge near the wall so that hopefully if the cook looked in on him, she wouldn’t see him. 

Aaron brushed Tristan’s longer locks from his forehead and watched him sleep for a few seconds before closing his eyes. This time the boy didn’t curl into his side. Instead he stayed on his side of the bed and Aaron wondered if this was what it was like to have a little brother that he actually loved. Sean was kept distant from him. Sean was the golden son. He wanted to love him and he hoped that when Sean got into school fully, that he’d be able to start some kind of relationship with him.


	9. June 1977

Aaron threw another t-shirt into his bag. He’d packed up almost everything he wanted from the bedroom, except for his clothes. He was throwing the last of them into the bag. He needed to get away from the house. He needed to just go. His parents and Sean were out to a meal and Aaron had been left home alone to think on what was coming for him in September. The only thing that had been keeping him tied to the house was protecting Sean. He might not know his younger brother well but as long as Aaron was there, his father didn’t seem to want to hit Sean. Aaron could feel his ribs protesting his movements. His face barely hurt from the slap that had dropped him to the ground but his ribs were hurting really bad from the kicks he’d received while on the floor. His mother had just watched and said nothing. Sean had been out playing with the neighbors when Aaron had been called into his father’s office. 

There was only a single way to escape going to Hargrave Military Academy. He had to run away. He’d figure out where Tristan lived and he’d go there. He’d take a sick mother over the one that he had. Tristan loved his mother to the ends of the earth and he figured that he could come to love her as well. He could help Tristan learn all the sports that his father wanted him to learn and he’d help Aaron in his school work. Anything was going to be better than Hargrave.

Aaron knew that once he was there, there was little chance he was going to come home. There was nothing that Aaron had ever done that had made his father hate him. He’d been born and his father hated him for that. He looked more like his mother yet and Sean looked like their father but was that enough of a reason? Since he’d been spending more time with his revolving door of secretaries and the nannies when he could get away with them, he’d stopped hitting mother. Aaron had been happy about that but it also just meant that he got it more. It was hard not to hate his mother for that. After she’d stood by and watched him get the snot kicked out of him, Aaron found that the last bit of love he had for her was gone. 

Zipping the bag up, Aaron marched out of his bedroom and wasn’t silent about it. He saw the cook out of the corner of his eye but he didn’t care. He wasn’t leaving yet. He was just getting things ready and getting what little he cared about in the world out of the hands of his father. He went right for the hideaway, needing to pack a few things from there. 

Over the years, he’s snuck money here and there from his parents. Sometimes when his father was drunk, he’d give Aaron money. Aaron always encouraged that. He had almost a thousand dollars saved up. That would get him wherever he needed to go. He just had to wait on Tristan. It never even entered his mind that Tristan wouldn’t want him to live with him.

“Are you going somewhere?” Tristan’s voice was soft like always but there was something else to it. He sounded scared. Aaron turned around and looked at his friend. Tristan looked to be around eight. He was getting better at guessing his age. 

“I want to go and live with you. Please, Tristan. Tell me where you live so that I can come and live with you.”

“Aaron? What happened?” Tristan moved forward and pulled Aaron into a hug. The pain flared in his chest and he couldn’t help the hiss that escaped his throat and he fought the urge to shove the younger boy away. “What happened?”

“Father is sending me to Hargrave Military Academy. Boarding me there. I don’t care that your mom is sick. I don’t care that your father doesn’t get you. I just need to get away from here. Please.” Aaron wasn’t going to cry. He’d learned a long time ago that crying wasn’t going to solve a thing. And what he’d said was as close to begging as anyone was ever going to get from him. 

“Aaron, I…you’re eleven right? This is nineteen seventy seven? I’m not even born yet. I won’t be for several more years.” Tristan dropped down to his butt at the edge of the wooden floor of the hideaway. “You can’t come live with me. I can’t take you with me and you can’t just show up on mom and dad’s porch. I’m sorry. Why is he sending you away?”

“I don’t know. Mother isn’t even fighting him.” Aaron dropped to his butt where he was standing. He didn’t want to be where he was but he also knew that Tristan was correct. “They have Sean and he’s perfect and I want to hate him but I can’t. I barely know him.”

“What’s so bad about the Academy?” Tristan asked as he scooted a little closer. 

“I don’t want to be in the military.” Aaron had no want to have anything to do with the military. He wanted to be free and the military wasn’t free at all. 

“What do you want to be? What do you see yourself doing?”

“I want to be a lawyer. I want to be a better lawyer than father. I want to work on the good side of the law and put people like him in jail.”

“If you run away, you won’t be able to be that. Why not use this as a way to get what you need?”

“What do you mean?” Aaron looked at Tristan. He could see something in his eyes. “What do you know?” Tristan wouldn’t meet his eyes. His friend had never lied to him before but what hadn’t he told him. Aaron could feel anger rising in him. 

“I know that you go to Hargrave. I’ve visited you at least once in your future and my past there.” Voice soft, Aaron almost didn’t hear Tristan as he spoke. 

“When?” Aaron wanted to know when Tristan had visited him there and why he hadn’t told him about it. He could feel the anger getting higher and higher. 

Tristan looked like he was thinking. “Hargrave is a nice place. I looked it up after I visited you there.”

“So you knew that father would be shipping me off there? You knew and you never told me?” Aaron moved to stand up but at the look of fear on Tristan’s face he stayed down but the boy was moving. Aaron tried to grab his leg but Tristan twisted out of the grip and before Aaron could even try and get to his feet fully, he was crashing through the woods. Aaron tried to follow him but the crashing was echoing around and he couldn’t pinpoint where he was. 

Instead, Aaron moved back to the hideaway. Tristan would come back or he wouldn’t. He thought about what he’d done. He knew that he could be scary looking. One of his teachers called him emotionless and she was kind of correct. He’d learned to not show anything but the one emotion that came through his facades was anger. If his father smelled even an ounce of fear, his beatings would be worse. He knew that he needed to apologize. Tristan was the only person in the world that he could be himself with. If Tristan left before Aaron could apologize he’d be stuck feeling like this until the roughly the same age Tristan came back and that could take several visits; if Tristan could find him more than once at Hargrave. He knew that Tristan came to places that were really important but how important could Hargrave be. 

Aaron knew that he’d be safe there. He’d stop getting hit and stop being in pain from cuts and bruises. He’d be safe. He hadn’t known what that word meant since he’d been an infant. Crossing his legs, Aaron propped his elbows on his knees and let his head rest on his fists. He couldn’t protect Sean from Hargrave but hopefully their father wouldn’t take up his abuse on Sean. He hated himself for thinking it but he really hoped that his father took up hitting his mother before he hit Sean. The first time that Aaron had gotten a bruise from his father, his mother should have left with him. It would have been long before Sean was born but she’d done nothing. The one time the cops had come to investigate a claim made by a family friend, she’d lied and said that her bruises were from Aaron. He’d been four and the memory was burned into his mind. He’d never forget the look of happiness on his father’s face when he was accused of hitting his mother. It was then he thought that his love for his mother had started to die. 

The only noise that was made to tell Aaron that someone was coming close was the rustle of a few leaves. There was no footfalls, no snapping of twigs. There was just a soft sound of leaves moving and then Aaron was looking into Tristan’s face, ten feet away. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…I didn’t mean to yell and I am sorry for trying to grab you.”

“I only keep things a secret because there is nothing that can change what happens. What point is there in making you sad for years instead of weeks? I’ve seen and I know so many things but nothing can be changed!” Tristan didn’t move any closer but his words rose in volume and Aaron just sat there. He’d never seen Tristan as anything but afraid, silent, and happy. “You usually don’t make demands and you just shocked me and then you looked so angry. I know that statistics on the rate of children who had been abused and the chance that they will abuse those around them and I just…”

“I would never hit you. I…that wasn’t anywhere on my mind. I just wanted to stop you from running.”

“But at what point does grabbing to stop turn into hitting to keep someone still as well.” Tristan’s eyes were trained on him and didn’t leave and Aaron couldn’t look away. Even though the words struck his heart. He wanted to protest but he couldn’t. “Abusers don’t just say one day that they are going to hit someone. It’s slow and gradual. A leads to B to C and so on and then they are monsters.”

“I’ve never thought of it that way.”

“What’s so wrong about Hargrave?” Tristan took a step forward and Aaron stayed still. “You don’t have to join the military but the teachers there have got to be smart. Your father has denied you the right to jump up in class. You are going to have to take placement tests to be placed in classes. Do your best and get placed the best you can. See if you can skip grades there. The people who run the place are not going to be bullied by your father. You can’t protect Sean any more than you have. You said that your mother will lie and Sean has never seen it and he’d never hit you hard enough to put you in a hospital. There is a record here that you’ve hit your mother. He may be a horrible father but he’s a good lawyer. The best thing that you can do is to help yourself as much as possible. Go to Hargrave, keep your head down. Graduate as soon as possible. If you ran, your father would be so mad, he could do what you fear is going to happen.”

“He could hit Sean.” Aaron sighed and let his head droop. “Does it make me a horrible person that I hope he hits mother instead of Sean?”

“Your mother made her choice, Aaron. Sean is innocent in all of this.”

“I don’t want to leave you behind either, Tristan.” Aaron looked up and he let his emotions crack his façade. 

“I found you once. I’m sure that I’ll find you again and again. We are friends forever!” Tristan smiled and threw his arms around Aaron pulling him in for a huge hug. He wrapped his arms around his friend and let the emotions flutter around in his head. Tristan might get scared of him but he’d come back. He’d proven that. He wasn’t going to lose him, ever.


	10. September 1977

Aaron looked around the campus of Hargrave Military Academy. He’d already been there three weeks and he was enjoying his classes. It was nice. It had taken a few days for him to get used to sleeping in barracks but now he kind of enjoyed it.

Tristan had been right. He had been given a placement exam. He’d placed high in almost everything. He’d be getting out early and already been told that he could probably get emancipation. The teacher that had overseen student drop off for the year had gotten to see Aaron get out of the car with his few bags and as soon as the trunk was shut, the car was gone. There had been no goodbyes. His mother hadn’t even come at all, just his father. He’d been shocked it hadn’t been his mother’s driver that had dropped him off but he figured that his father was trying in some small way to protect his own image. 

Today was Sunday and he pretty much had the day to himself. He’s attended the morning service and the evening service was voluntary. Some weeks he went because he was bored. It wasn’t hard to love the grounds. There was a large set of woods where he and the other students would run. There was also a large concrete track where they could run. He’d never thought that he’d like running. In gym it was always horrible but here it was silent and introspective. He only had to listen and pay attention to commands and he was good. 

There was a happiness at Hargrave that Aaron hadn’t known that he could like. He got along well enough with his classmates, both in age and in education but he kept himself distant. He didn’t need someone else. He just needed to get through school. 

Aaron was making his way towards the woods. He’d already been told that when he had free time he could go into the woods as long as he was back in the mess for meals at the right times. The best path in the woods started right near the track and the locker rooms. He was passing by the locker rooms when he saw a young boy, naked at the doors. Considering that the starting age for boys was seventh grade, this kid was way too young. It wasn’t until he got closer and saw the mop of hair that he realized it was Tristan. He stopped and watched as Tristan used something to pick the lock on the door. He was amazed at that. In a way though it made sense. Naked kids drew attention and the only way to get not naked was to find clothes. At Aaron’s home, he always had access to clothes that Aaron had set out. 

“Tristan!” Aaron hissed, worried that others might be around. The boy spun around and took a step back but when he saw Aaron he smiled. Aaron crouched and the boy ran to hug him. He looked to be around the age of five. No wonder older Tristan had been a little vague about Hargrave. They hadn’t known each other that long the first time that Tristan had come. “Did you get it open?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll get you a shirt from my locker. It’s going to be big but I think it’ll be fine. Today is Sunday so we can spend the day in the woods. Most of the boys are watching TV or visiting family.”

“You didn’t want to go home for the weekend?” Tristan asked, his eyes sad. Aaron was sure that Tristan knew the answer. Aaron found his locker and opened it, handing over a long t-shirt. The boy would swim in it but it was better than being naked. 

“I wasn’t given the offer of going home. I think that father made a nice donation to keep me here all the time. And a few of the teachers here have talked about emancipation when I finish school here. When I turn sixteen I can access my trust fund but I might be able to access it earlier if I am at college to pay for college and things.”

“That’s good.” Tristan wasn’t acting like normal. He was looking around as they walked out of the locker room. Tristan was good at keeping secrets and he’d kept his knowledge about Hargrave secret at every age. 

“Tristan, you don’t need to worry about telling me about this. You keep it a secret from me and you keep it well. Let’s enjoy today and not worry about anything else.”

Tristan smiled and nodded but they stayed silent on the small trek to one of the foxholes that had been dug. He knew that the older boys would sometimes take local girls out into the woods for things that were better not brought up while Tristan was there with him. It would give them a good place to hide and it would be really easy to hide Tristan if someone came along. 

Aaron jumped down in first and Tristan just stood at the edge, looking wholly unsure. Aaron held out his hands and Tristan gave him a weird look before he jumped down into Aaron’s arms. The boy was a lot lighter than Aaron thought he would be. He was skinny yes but he looked to have a good bit of baby fat still on him, but it was deceptive. Aaron was pretty sure that he could toss the kid a good distance. 

“You are the one that talked me into coming here instead of running away. I wanted to. I wanted to run away so bad but you talked sense into me.”

“I’ll always talk sense into you, Aaron.” Tristan looked around the foxhole and smiled as he dropped down onto what looked to be the only dry spot. Aaron laughed and moved over to tower over him, lifting him and sitting back down with Tristan in his lap. The boy shifted but settled easily enough. He was the only person that Aaron was tactile with. It was like second nature to him. 

“So exactly how good are you at picking locks?”

“I’ve not found a lock I can’t pick given enough time and the right tools. Locks now are easy, the farther forward I go they get harder but I always pick them in the end. Older me has a lock pick set that I’ve used. He hides the most stupid stuff behind locks. I’ve found that he hides the best things in plain sight. There’s one lock I don’t try and pick though and that’s his safe. He’s told me not to. I do as he asks.” Tristan leaned his head back to where it was resting on Aaron’s shoulder. “How do you like your new classmates?”

“It’s a fresh start. No one knows me. They only know what I want them to know. I like it.” 

“What’s your favorite class?”

“Right now literature but I’ll be in the Marksmanship class soon. I’m kind of looking forward to it.”

“Rifles?”

“Yes.” Aaron couldn’t express how much he was looking forward to learning how to shoot a gun of any kind. He’d seen his father’s. His dad really didn’t do anything with them, just a thing of a man needing to own a gun. “I think it’ll be nice. I do enjoy my morning run as well. I think it’s something that I’ll keep up past the academy.”

Tristan hummed and Aaron realized exactly how lax the boy was in his arms.

“Your mom sick again?”

“Yes.”

Aaron started to talk. He talked about his classes, his teachers, and the few classmates of his that bunked around him that it was hard to not talk to at night and in the mornings. He talked and talked until he knew that Tristan was asleep in his arms and he kept right on talking past that. He didn’t stop until Tristan’s small form disappeared. No one questioned when Aaron showed up in the mess and was silent. There were several kids who everyone knew had come from kind of bad homes and that Hargrave was a place to escape. Aaron took a table to himself and no one sat down with him. He could feel the teacher’s eyes on him but he didn’t care. He was safe here and when he got older, he’d find a way to keep Tristan safe as well. 

While Tristan used the word sick and didn’t like to talk about what exactly was wrong with her, when he was tired things slipped. Whatever was wrong with her, it came and went and as he got older it was getting worse and worse. It wasn’t the kind of sickness that one got over it seemed so Aaron kind of figured that it was a mental illness. Tristan never seemed scared of her but he could see a fear in his eyes sometimes when he showed up. When he got older, he could do more to help his only friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I forgot to load up the lovely banner that was made for this when I started posting it so please go back to chapter one and have a gander. It's so pretty!


	11. November 1978

Aaron always wondered what a real Thanksgiving was like. With a family that loved each other. Where the smell of cooking turkey was something that calmed instead of scared. Aaron had never had a Thanksgiving like that. He always wondered though. Tristan had talked about his on the few occasions where Aaron could get him to open up but it was always with Thanksgiving’s when he was younger.

The mess hall was empty and Aaron kind of liked it. Four teachers had stayed on campus over the small holiday break. The cooks had prepared food for the day yesterday and Aaron was kind of happy about that. He was allowed to meander in and eat when he wanted. He had been the only student to not go home. Up until he’d seen that several teachers had stayed behind, Aaron had been upset that someone had to stay with him. 

The letter had come in the mail two weeks ago and when he’d received it, he’d given it to one of his teachers to pass along to whoever would need to take care of it. His father was going out of the country for the week and his mother and Sean were going to New York. He’s seen the pitying looks that he’d received but thankfully no one said anything. He liked it better that way. 

Food was eaten in the mess hall but the rest of the time, if Aaron wasn’t sleeping, he was in the library. He’d already finished up the work that had been given for the break and was working on his independent study classes. His teachers had taken to him well and his want to learn and to get out of there as quickly as possible wasn’t seen as a slight to them, thankfully but as a student wanting to learn. Tristan had been monumental in helping with him getting what he wanted. The boy was proving to be a wordsmith and he was clever. Their visits were less but longer as well. Sometimes while on a run through the woods, he’d spot Tristan hiding from sight but he knew what to look for so he saw him. If he came during the week, Tristan stayed hidden in the woods but when he was there on the weekends, they were inseparable.

The library was where Aaron was now. He had a table covered in what books he could find on law degrees. There was a surprising amount of information on it. While most it had to do with the military aspect of things there was a lot on civilian law as well. As soon as he’d met with a counselor to talk about his career and life goals, it hadn’t been long before she had wanted to know why he wanted to become a lawyer. He’d been truthful. He wanted to be a better lawyer than his father. The woman had been shocked but he’d shown an aptitude for it and he was enjoying learning. 

The sound of the library door opening and shutting didn’t bother him. The teachers were in and out to check on him several times throughout the day. He wrote out a few more lines of the paper he was working on and only stopped when a shadow fell across the table he was working at. He chose not to look up and instead just waited to see if the teacher was going to say anything to him. A chair was pulled out and someone sat down across from him. Aaron finally looked up and was shocked to see Tristan sitting there. He looked to be around ten years old. 

“How did you get in here?”

“Locked doors mean nothing to me. Found your barrack and stole some clothes too. What are you working on?”

“Homework. I’m taking three independent study classes this year and I’m getting as much done over break in them as I can.”

“Cool. So…did you hear back about the mock trial team?”

“I’ll be joining in the spring.” Aaron smiled at Tristan. “Go knock yourself out in the books. Science is over that way.” He pointed and Tristan sprinted off towards those books. Just as he rounded the corner, the main door opened and one of the literature teachers stuck his head in. Aaron looked at him and then gave a little wave. He waved back and then was gone. 

When Tristan came back he had over a dozen books stacked in his hands. He set them down on the floor beside him. Aaron watched as he easily shifted around to cross his legs and settled a book down into his lap. Over the years, he’d realized that Tristan read at an amazing rate and that it was just getting quicker and quicker but he didn’t like to call attention to it. Aaron let him have that freedom. He was sure that he spent day after day with people remarking on it. He would love to know the actual words per minute though that he topped out at. 

Dinner time came around and Aaron went to the mess and Tristan went to the barracks. Once dinner was over, Aaron wouldn’t see a teacher until the next day. They would be safe up there. He gave Tristan a different t-shirt to sleep in. One that was a little bit bigger. 

“You’ve not made any mention of your own schooling. You are still set to graduate in two years, yes?” 

“It’s okay. I’m bored in a few classes but it’s the only math and science classes that I can take. I should have tested out of them but I needed the credits. Gym class is horrible as it always has been.”

“And the bullies?”

“Same as always. I spend most of my time in the library so they don’t bother me as much as the librarian hates disruptions of any kind. From there its bus home and I spend the rest of the day there. Dad’s given up on sports.” Tristan looked away from Aaron for a moment. He let his head slump and Aaron could now feel the sadness wafting off the boy. He moved over to the bed and sat down beside him. He pulled the boy closer. “I think that dad’s close to giving up on a lot of things.”

“I’m sorry.”

“And I’m in high school and there are girls there and many of them are very pretty but I just…” Tristan stopped talking and looked at Aaron through the mask his hair was making. It was dark in the barracks, only the light of the moon giving them anything to see each other by. “What do you think about gays?”

“I’ve never thought much about sexuality. I know what my father spouts about it. I know what my family thinks but I’ve never thought much about my own sexuality. I want to be happy. I want to find someone who makes me happy. Look at father and mother. I’m sure that at one point they liked each other maybe even loved each other but I can’t help but wonder if they should have never married. Heterosexual couples can be horrible but what if that’s because the person they are married to is not who they are supposed to be married to. If they love each other why not let them be together.” Aaron looped his arm around Tristan’s shoulders and pulled him in even closer. “Why?”

“One of the girls that lives down the block from me. She’s a year younger than me. She kissed me yesterday and I just…I know that I am ten and I know that I shouldn’t be thinking about it but I would have rather had her brother kiss me.”

“And you want to talk about that?” Aaron asked.

“No. I…” Tristan rolled to his knees and turned to face him. “I feel safe with you and if I’m going to upset someone over kissing them, I’d rather it be you because you won’t hit me.”

“You want to kiss me?” Aaron asked. He looked at the younger boy in shock. Tristan nodded his head and didn’t move from the spot. He just stared at Aaron’s face. Aaron knew that at thirteen he was a little odd in that he didn’t care about trying to hook up with a girl. Many of his classmates spent the weekends trying to get with local girls but he stayed and did schoolwork. He’d never thought about kissing a girl much less a guy in anything more than an abstract way. Before Hargrave he’d kissed girls. It was easier to kiss them when they wanted it than to live with the names he’d be called. 

“Yes. I don’t know if it’s just that I’m too young or that I really am gay.”

“And you want me to be your first boy kiss?” Aaron asked. Tristan sighed and rolled his eyes. Aaron glared and he just stared back. “Fine but we have to go to bed after this. I have to be up early to get a good run.”

“Fine.” Tristan just stared at him but Aaron didn’t move. Tristan wanted the kiss and Aaron was going to make him work for it. It didn’t take long for the boy to figure it out and he leaned in. Aaron kept his eyes opened and watched as the other boy moved closer. When their lips were just an inch or two apart, only then did Tristan close his eyes. Aaron kept his hands in his lap and eyes locked on him as their lips brushed hesitantly and then with more pressure. He stayed still and let Tristan dictate what happened. After a few seconds the boy pulled back, licking his lips just as they separated and the wet tongue brushed his but Aaron didn’t react. 

When Tristan settled back, he opened his eyes again. It was one of the few times that Aaron was unable to read the emotions in his eyes. He gave it a moment but the boy wasn’t offering anything.

“Well?”

“It didn’t feel any different,” Tristan said with a huff and he dropped from knees to his butt on the bed. 

“You are just too young. Give it a couple of years. Crawl off the bed. We are going to have to share because I don’t want anyone to think I slept in their bed.” 

Tristan nodded and pushed himself off the bed. Aaron moved off and untucked the blankets from the bed and laid down. Thankfully he slept on his side as it would mean that Tristan had enough room. When Aaron was under the covers, the boy moved in with him. He also laid on his side but instead of his back to Aaron’s front he tucked his head under Aaron’s and shuffled close. Aaron looped an arm around him to hold him close and willed himself asleep. 

When the sun rose the next morning Aaron was alone in bed and he couldn’t figure out why that hurt so much.


	12. December 1978

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise that when I started posting this, it wasn't my plan to post up a Christmas chapter on Christmas. It just happened that way!

Aaron was looking forward to Christmas day for the first time since he’d turned three. There was only a single person left on campus other than himself and that was his marksmanship teacher. The man had a few simple rules, eat two meals a day with him in the mess and don’t do anything stupid. Aaron could abide by those rules. It wasn’t hard. His mornings were spent working on independent study classes. He’d finished off all the work for the whole year for two of them. By the time break was over, he thought that he’d have the other done as well. If he was, he could fit another two classes in for the second half of the year. 

The second day of the break, the teacher had come up to Aaron and waited to be acknowledged before he’d started speaking. He’d talked about the school wanting their boys to go out and be the best that they could be. The speech that he heard all the time when parents visited before sending their sons here. He hadn’t understood why the teacher was telling him this. 

“To do that, our boys need to have good records. Your record at your previous two schools were perfect. Your record here is going to be exemplary. It’s your before school record that concerned the president and I. We looked into it.”

Aaron’s blood had run cold at what he knew the man was talking about. Aaron had turned his face back down to his paper and continued to work. His teacher hadn’t been affected. 

“That charge report is gone. The President has some friends and no matter what kind of background check is done on you, it’ll never come out because it never existed. I know the kind of young man you are, Aaron. Reading that report and knowing what your parents did. It made me understand you more. Why you never told anyone. Why you let it happen. As well as why you don’t care that you don’t go home. I’m a single man who has no want of a wife and kids. Every single time that you stay behind, I’ll be staying too. This Christmas. Easter. Summer will be a revolving door of teachers. If she won’t press charges and seems to be willing to lie, there isn’t much you can do. But remember this, you are not weak.”

“Thank you,” Aaron has said. The teacher had left after that and Aaron only saw him at meal times. Most days the man prepared dinner for them while lunch was whatever Aaron could find and breakfast was cold cereal or oatmeal. 

The day before Christmas, Tristan showed up. With a haunted look in his eyes and sadness wafting off him and for that first day nothing could make him smile so they stayed in the library. Halfway through the day Aaron needed a break and he looked up and watched Tristan reading. He watched as a small finger trailed down the page. He’d blocked out the sound of the ten year old flipping pages but now he noticed. When it came time for him to switch books, Aaron went back to work on his paper and only looked up again when he was sure Tristan wasn’t looking at him. He’d never seen the boy read that fast. Either he’d gotten a lot better at reading or he was finally reading at the true speed that he could. Aaron didn’t bring it up. He knew that Tristan was having a hard time in high school and that it was weighing hard on him. 

Every time he tried to get Tristan to talk about why he was so upset, the boy would deflect onto something else. He wondered if his dad had finally left. 

Tristan ended up staying for four days. Aaron made sure that he ate and that the teacher never saw him but their usual discussions of their lives never happened. Tristan lost himself in books and Aaron in his work. It felt good but weird at the same time. He wondered what it meant that he felt better around a boy of varying ages than he did teens and other’s that were the same age as him.


	13. July 1980

Aaron had been alone all day. He’d gone to the funeral like a good son would and then he’d come home on his own and had holed up in his bedroom. There had been knocks at the door and even a few people who demanded that he come out of his room but he’d responded to none of them. He’d stayed where he was. 

Summer had seen him returned to his home. Construction over the summer at Hargrave meant that no one was allowed on campus for the first six weeks of summer vacation and the president had made sure that Aaron’s parents had known that Aaron was expected to go home for the summer. 

Visits from Tristan had been few and far between over the past year. Aaron missed him a great deal. He really wanted him there but he had no way of forcing the boy through time to be there when he needed him. And Aaron hadn’t seen him since he’d come home. 

His father had died from a heart attack and that pissed Aaron off. He’d followed his father expecting to have a lover who was not his current secretary, who according to his mother was his only woman on the side but instead he’d found out that he had cancer. Using his skills that Tristan had taught him at lock picking, Aaron had then broke into his dad’s home office and found out that it was fatal. There was no way to recover from it and he’d chosen to live out his time in his own way. Aaron had wanted that. He’d wanted his dad to suffer through all the pain that dying of cancer was going to give him. 

It was hard to be around Sean who looked up to their father and near worshipped the ground he walked on. His younger brother had never suspected a single horrible thing about his home life. Aaron hated him for that but it was out of love that kept that aspect a secret as well. It had only taken a single day for their father to hit Aaron again once he’d been home. 

Fourteen year old Aaron was bigger and due to his training at Hargrave, he was stronger but there was always the fear that the abuse could be turned to Sean. Sean was only nine and if the only thing that Aaron could do to protect him was take a few hits, he could do that. 

Moving to the window, Aaron looked at the people gathered in the backyard. Family members that had never cared that his father was hitting him. Family who Aaron had told after the third time it had happened when he was three. Coworkers of his father’s who ignored the fact that he adored his younger son and his eldest was never seen. If it wasn’t for the gathering of people outside, Aaron would have long slipped away to his hideaway. 

The sound of his doorknob trying to turn told Aaron that someone else was trying again to slip into his room. He didn’t turn around to look because there was no one with a key. He’d taken all the cleaning staff’s copies the night before he had even broken into his father’s office again to steal the master key to the house. The only clue that whoever it was had actually made it into the room was the click of the lock back into place. 

Aaron turned around ready to yell at whoever it was but instead he just stopped cold. Tristan was standing there in a pair of slacks and a shirt that didn’t fit him right and he could tell that there was a tag still hanging off the shirt. It looked like clothes from the little shop a mile away that his mother never let them buy clothes from because those that shopped there didn’t have enough money to get real clothes. 

“Hi,” Tristan said. 

“Hi,” Aaron said back. Tristan was there and he had no clue what to say to him. He was shocked though that it was ten year old Tristan. He had been the one coming around more and more it seemed. He wasn’t sure what that meant. “Where did you get the clothes?”

“An older me left some money he’d earned in a safe place in the woods. Just in case I needed something and you weren’t around. With you at Hargrave, it’s been a little hard to get food sometimes. The new cook notices when I eat more than the old ones used to.”

“Yeah, he’s a very observant man.” Aaron wanted to move over and hug him but he was stuck by the window.

“So…” Tristan said as he crossed the room. He stopped at Aaron’s side, looking out onto the lawn in the backyard. “He died.”

“Yes.” Aaron clenched his fists because if he didn’t, he was going to put his fist through a wall. He took a deep breath and exhaled sharply. He didn’t miss the sudden tensing of the other boy’s shoulders. 

“What happened?”

“Heart attack. A fucking heart attack!” Aaron near yelled. He pushed himself away from the glass of his window. Tristan stayed where he was but Aaron stalked around the room. If he didn’t stop moving he was going to do something that he regretted. He didn’t want to scare Tristan. 

“And you wanted him to die another way?” Tristan asked. 

Spinning to look at the boy, Aaron just stared. Tristan didn’t back down though. He just stared right back.

“How else would he have died?”

“He could have waited and let the fucking cancer kill him!” Aaron yelled. He couldn’t contain it. He moved to the door to his bedroom and kicked at it. He kept on kicking until he felt the hot tears falling down his face and a hand on his shoulder. That touch did him in. He dropped to his knees, leaning on the door and he let the tears fall. “He could have died in pain with a body that’s wasted away. He could have given me back a little pleasure in seeing him die in a horrible way.”

“Oh, Aaron.” The voice wasn’t familiar but the smell was. Aaron tipped to the side and let the strong arms catch him. He curled into the heat of the body next to him. Arms surrounded him and pulled him closer. He broke down with only the two Tristans to see. Letting out all the frustration. All the fear. All the horribleness that was his life before that moment. He didn’t care that he was tucked into adult Tristan’s lap like a child would be. He wanted this. He needed the comfort. It was wonderful. To not have to be so strong. 

“What can I do?” Younger Tristan asked.

“In the office there is a bottle of brandy behind the encyclopedias. Over there in the drawer is the master key to the house, go and get it.” 

Aaron heard the words and he wondered how adult Tristan knew where he’d hidden the keys but he couldn’t stop crying to ask. He heard the door open and then shut again. Tristan moved only long enough to throw the lock and he barely disturbed Aaron. Before he settled again though, Aaron heard the sound of something heavy being set on the floor. His breath hitched and he tried to talk but Tristan just shushed him.

“I’m not going anywhere. It was just my gun. Just calm down, Aaron. I’m not going anywhere. Just try and breathe.” A hand was moving up and down his back. He breathed out when the hand hit his shoulders and in when it was on the down stroke. He was still crying and he was sure that Tristan’s shirt was soaked and covered in snot but Tristan didn’t seem to care so neither would he. 

A subtle knock sounded on the door. Aaron tried to figure out what it was but he couldn’t place it but Tristan had to have because he threw the lock again. The door was shut again in seconds and the lock sounded again. Aaron kept his face buried in Tristan’s shoulder. He didn’t hear a word but after nearly a minute a glass was pressing at his lips. He tipped his head back and drank whatever it was in the glass. It burned and he coughed but warmth was spreading in his limbs. He buried his face back in the hollow of the man’s neck and tried to stop shuddering. He was done crying but he couldn’t stop shuddering. The sound of feet on the floor told him that younger Tristan was moving around. 

“Let’s get you up and into bed, Aaron.”

Aaron let himself be moved. Tristan didn’t have him strip out of his clothes, instead just tucked him in and sat down on the bed beside him. Aaron threw his pillow away and laid his head on the older man’s thigh. It was getting dark out and the light in the room hadn’t been turned on. There were shadows everywhere and Aaron couldn’t even see Tristan’s face. The whisper of cloth behind him had him trying to look at what caused it but his head was held in place.

“It was just younger me leaving. I can tell you haven’t slept in days, Aaron. Just sleep. Everything will look better in the morning. Just relax and sleep.”

Tristan’s hand wasn’t on his back anymore. It was on his head and near petting him. Between the alcohol that Tristan had given him and the utter exhaustion from not sleeping coupled with the crying, Aaron couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer. He let them fall closed and just let himself go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tomorrow's posting is the end of Arc 1. Monday starts Arc 2 and it's 30 chapters long.


	14. July 1981

Aaron looked around his bedroom one last time. He was the only one left in the house. His mother and Sean had moved out within weeks of his father’s will being carried out. The house was left to his mother but she didn’t want it so she had it handed over to Aaron. With her own family money plus the assets that had been left to her, she had bought a townhouse in DC and moved Sean with her. Sean was liking his new school. Aaron had finished up at Hargrave and had come home to close down the house. 

The groundskeeper was going to stay on and take care of the house and the grounds. Aaron was even thinking of renting it out. The family lawyer who had taken care of his father’s will had been retained to take care of Aaron and Sean’s trusts. 

“Hotch?” Stephen asked as he entered the bedroom. He was there for another set of boxes. Stephen had been one of the only friends that Aaron had made at Hargrave and when he’d asked if Aaron needed help moving his things out of Hargrave and then his childhood home, he hadn’t been able to turn him down. Stephen had been the one to give him the nickname of Hotch. He liked it. “Anything else?”

“No.” Aaron turned off the light and shut the door behind him as he left the room. The groundskeeper, Tom, was waiting at the base of the stairs. Aaron handed over the duplicate master key to the house. “Take care of her for me?”

“Of course, Aaron. Go have fun at GWU. We’ll be waiting for you.”

The lawyer had tried to talk him into selling the house but Aaron couldn’t. He couldn’t sell a place where Tristan could come back to. He hadn’t seen the boy or the man since his father’s funeral. Not at Hargrave and not here at the house when he visited and packed up things to sell. 

“I’ll meet you at the truck,” Aaron said as he stepped out the front door. Stephen nodded and Aaron turned towards the backyard. He walked the distance into the woods to find the hideaway. He had written down the address of his mother’s townhouse, where he was going to be staying until he could move into his dorm on the GWU campus. There was no evidence that anything had been disturbed. The clothes looked folded the same. The blankets were the same. 

“I’ll keep an eye out for your friend,” Tom said behind him. Aaron spun to look at him. He hadn’t heard Tom sneak up on him. 

“What do you mean?”

“The little thing that comes sometimes and spends hours reading books or just wandering the grounds. I’ve seen him for years. He always hides from me but sometimes he doesn’t see me when he’s swimming in the pond. I’ll make sure that he don’t freeze in the winter. I know where you keep the fuel for the lantern. Your parents may not have ever seen him but the staff here had. Gladys said that he was the only reason you survived your childhood here in this house. I’ll take care of him.”

“Thank you.” Aaron smiled. He worried though. While it was good that he wasn’t the only one who had seen him, it was the hard and lonely nights where he thought that he’d gone insane and imagined him that had been the worst. Whatever happened that caused Tristan to not come to him had to have been horrible. He couldn’t find a kid named Tristan in the world though. No matter how tempted he was. He never had actually gotten a date of birth out of him. He’d also found it odd that he’d seen an adult Tristan twice now but never an adult between that age and eleven. He’d seen ten year old Tristan many times but never a teenaged one. It was as if between eleven and whatever age he was when he’d come that first time as an adult, he’d stopped seeking out Aaron. Had he done something or had Tristan? “If he needs me, you know how to get a hold of me.”

“Of course, Aaron. Now go. You have a full life ahead of you. Forget the bad that you have suffered here and go live. Go be happy.”

Aaron smiled and moved towards where Stephen was waiting on him. Tom was right. He did have a life waiting on him. A life that he could make his own.  
**End of Arc 1**


	15. Arc 2-October 1984

Aaron sighed as he left his last class of the day. His first year at Georgetown was shaping up to be a good year. He’d gotten through GWU as quickly as he’d been able. Now he was working on his law degree and was quite happy to be finally out of the reach of his mother. He’d been subjected to her mothering in a way that he’d been unused to given that she’d never given him the time of day up until the day that they laid his father in the ground. For the sake of not fighting he’d stayed with her in the summers when he wasn’t able to stay in the dorms, but when he turned eighteen, he’d moved into an apartment with a few others who were in his classes. He hadn’t gone back to her townhouse except to visit Sean.

Sean, his still distant brother. Aaron’s heart ached when he thought about the time lost with him and no amount of visits seemed to be able to get it back. Dropping down to a bench to sort through his books to figure out which one he wanted to start reading, Aaron felt eyes on him. He looked up and found a young man looking at him. He looked to be around Aaron’s age and there was something familiar about him but Aaron couldn’t place it. It was September and still warm but yet he was dressed in slacks and a red sweater. When Aaron’s eyes met his, the man looked away. 

For an hour the two of them played a game of chicken with their gazes. The man was watching him and Aaron didn’t like it. Now that he was thinking about it, he’d seen the man a lot over his month at Georgetown. 

When the man jumped up and took off around the corner of the building he was sitting by, Aaron followed, shouldering his backpack and just slipping his book under his shoulder. He rounded the corner and saw the man hurrying to go around another corner. Aaron stepped up his speed. There were at least ten doors around that corner that he could disappear into and Aaron wanted to know why the man was watching him. 

Going around the corner, Aaron cursed. He had no line of sight on the man. The sweater wasn’t hard to miss and there was no flash of red. He’d slipped into a door going into one of the two buildings. 

After that Aaron kept his eye out for the man. He didn’t see him for over a month. At a Halloween party on campus, Aaron was indulging in a little bit of fun. His studies were all caught up and he had nothing pressing so he allowed his apartment mate to talk him into a party. It was a masked party and Aaron had found a nice costume that covered only the upper parts of his face. His lips and chin were the only open parts. 

There were a lot of people at the party and it was hard to recognize anyone but he figured that was the point of it. The house was large and every room in it had something going on. The oddest room was the one that seemed to have a guard. He watched as a guy and a girl left the room, peeking inside he saw that they were playing spin the bottle. He wondered why there was a guard when it was answered for him. One of the boys spun the bottle and it landed on another of the guys they leaned over and kissed. His mind went back to the kiss that he’d shared with Tristan. He’d never thought about it. 

“Want in?” The guard asked. Aaron nodded. “You freak out. You deal with me and get thrown out.”

“I’ll be fine.” Aaron was allowed in and he waited for the group to make room for him. He was nervous but it was the thought of kissing a girl as much as kissing a guy that had him on edge. Relationships were never a thing that he ever thought about. It wasn’t something that he needed. The only relationship that he knew of was one that showed him exactly what not to do. He didn’t want anything like what his parents had. If he ever found himself at the point where he would want to be with another person more than his spouse, he’d leave before doing something as horrible as cheat. 

Aaron was handed the bottle and he set it down on the ground, spinning it. It landed on the blonde with the skin tight black cat costume on. She smirked at him and instead of just leaning over like the other did, she stood up and moved to sit down in his lap. Her kiss was hot and heavy and the people around him cheered. Aaron didn’t know what to do with his hands so he just settled them on her hips but as soon as he did, she stood up again and moved back to her seat. The girl beside him took the bottle. Aaron loosened up as the bottle was spun time and again. 

When the fifth spin after Aaron had arrived had someone yelling closet, Aaron was intrigued. The guy stood up and held out his hand. The girl allowed herself to be pulled up and then out of the room they went. He didn’t want to ask but then one of the group moved to the closet door of the room they were in and knocked before just jerking the door open. Inside were two girls who looked very much like they had been making out. Aaron had heard of seven minutes in heaven from his classmates at Hargrave. It had been something that had intrigued him. The girls left the closet and settled back into the circle of people at the same time another male entered the room. He was wearing a full cloth mask that covered his entire face. It was black and he looked a great deal like death. It made Aaron shiver.

The newcomer got to spin the bottle and Aaron watched at it spun around and around before settling down on him. Aaron leaned in and so did the man. He lifted up his mask just enough for his lips to become visible. He gripped the back of the man’s head to help steady himself and kissed him. It was so different than it had been when he’d kissed Tristan. Yet there was something else there. The man he was kissing gasped and Aaron felt brave and darted his tongue out to brush at lips. 

“CLOSET!” The entire group called out. Aaron froze. He opened his eyes and looked into the eyes of the man he had just licked the lips of. There was anticipation in the brown eyes. Aaron took a deep breath and gave a subtle nod, he got a nod back. The man stood up first and they were escorted to the closet. The darkness of the closet was a little much but Aaron reached out with a hand and found the man’s cheek. He was shivering.

“What’s wrong? We don’t have to do this.”

“Scared of the dark. I’ve never liked it.” The voice was soft and full of fear. 

“Then why did you agree to this?”

“Because I wanted to kiss you more. Kiss me and I’ll forget that we are in a dark closet.” The body shifted closer and Aaron leaned in when he felt breath on his lips, he closed the rest of the gap and found hot lips. Where he’d been unsure of what to do with his hands before he knew what to do this time. He wrapped one around the back of the man’s skull and kissed him hard and fast. His other hand scooted down body until he could grip hip and pull him closer. The man’s hands slipped down his chest and settled on his abs. He felt his mask shift on his face but he didn’t care. He took a step forward and the man moved willingly until Aaron had him pressed into the wall. Their bodies were pressed together from knees to chest and Aaron agreed that he was in heaven.

The knock at the door came all too quickly and Aaron only pulled away when he heard a hand on the doorknob. Light flooded into the closet and Aaron looked at the kiss swollen lips of his make out partner. The man stiffened. 

“Aaron?” the man whispered and Aaron took a step back, trying to figure out exactly how this man knew him. The voice wasn’t familiar but then he sounded out of breath. Before he could reach out and lift the other man’s mask, he darted out of the closet and took off running. The exit door was open and he was out of it before Aaron could even think to follow him. When he got his body back into his control from the shock, Aaron followed. He could see the black hood of the costume even through the group of people. The man had been just as tall as him and it wasn’t a shock that Aaron could follow him. Into the backyard the man ran and Aaron followed. Over a fence he went and Aaron fell over the fence. When he was on his feet again, the man was gone from sight. Instead of going back to the party, Aaron went back his apartment. He was sitting on his bed when his roommate, Ben got back. 

“What happened? I heard that you made a spectacle. Chased someone in a black mask throughout the house.” 

“Seven minutes in heaven and my partner knew who I was but I didn’t know who he was and I wanted to find out. He ran.”

“That blows.”

“It very much does,” Aaron said and turned his head back down. Ben took the message for what it was, dismissal. Aaron pushed the thought of the stranger who knew his name out of his mind because if he kept thinking about him, he’d never get to sleep and he had class in the morning.


	16. October 1985

Aaron heard her laugh before he saw her. It sounded beautiful. He was taking a break from studying. It was a Saturday and he had a whole weekend of work planned. He’d pushed off a visit to his mother’s townhouse under the guise of needing to study so he’d feel horrible if he didn’t at least spend most of his time doing that. He’d spent most of the day locked in his bedroom and when Ben had gotten back, the smell of crisp fall air had pulled Aaron outside for a little bit of studying before his stomach decided that he needed to eat. It was well past the dinner hour. 

Scanning the room, Aaron saw her. She was sitting at a table by herself with a empty plate in front of her. Her legs were tucked into the chair with her and she had a book open, resting on her knees. Eyes were alight with laughter at whatever words she was reading on the pages. When he was through the short line of late eating students, Aaron made his way towards her. He passed behind her, his eyes on the table to her left when she decided to stand up. Her chair scooted back a good distance and bumped into him. His glass of tea fell off his tray and he could only watch as it fell to the floor. She jumped out of the way and thankfully only a little bit splashed on Aaron’s jeans. 

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” The girl said with a frown on her face. 

“It’s fine. I shouldn’t have been so close. I wasn’t paying attention either. Good book?” Aaron nodded with his head at the book as one of the commissary staff came to clean up the spilled tea. 

“It’s a wonderful book. Let me buy you a replacement tea.” 

“Only if you sit with me and keep me company while I eat,” Aaron said. 

The smile he got from her lit up the whole room. “Ok. Haley Brooks.” Haley held out her hand and Aaron shifted his tray to where he could shake it.

“Aaron Hotchner.”

Aaron took a seat at her table while she moved up to get him a replacement tea. When she brought it back, Aaron noticed there was only one other man on the far side of the room. He was reading a book that was set on the top of the table. There was a glass of water at his side but no food. Aaron dismissed it as someone who obviously had been eating and was now studying. The man was looking around the room and his eyes narrowed when he saw Aaron looking at him. Aaron stared until the man looked away. 

“So, what are you studying?” Haley asked, pulling Aaron’s gaze back to her. 

“I’m studying at the Law School.”

“Oh, you look young.”

“I started college at fifteen and graduated early from pre-law.”

“That’s impressive.”

“What are you studying?”

“English Literature. I was thinking of getting an MLS but I decided to go just straight English Lit. I love reading and I love finding out everything hidden in stories.”

“That’s good. Are you going to try and become a librarian after graduation?”

Aaron ate while he kept Haley talking about herself. It wasn’t hard. The more he talked with her, the more he fell in love. He knew then that he was going to marry her. She was dedicated to her studies and was more than welcome to do study dates than actual dates out. She was perfect for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today is the one year anniversary of posting up my first Criminal Minds fic! YAY ME!


	17. February 1986

Aaron was seated at his favorite upscale restaurant in DC. He’d arrived early for his date with Haley. It was Valentine’s Day and he was really looking forward to how the night was going to go. Ben was gone for the weekend on a visit home as his girlfriend was back home. It was a Friday night and Aaron had made sure that his bedroom was spotless. Haley shared a dorm room with two other girls and it wasn’t going to be a place to go back to. It had taken Aaron a few moments to get what she meant when she had made mention of that two weeks before. 

In the small drawer in his bedside table was a new box of condoms and, just in case he’d bought a bottle of lube. He’d heard talk of first times for some girls didn’t always go well and he didn’t want to hurt her. His hands had shook when he’d handed over the money for the condoms at the drugstore he’d taken a bus to on the far side of the city. 

There had never been a time in his life when he’d wanted anything to do with Valentine’s Day. It was just another day. When he’d been younger he’d stayed far away from his parents on the day as his father was a time bomb usually. His mother was dispassionate. After they had both decided that it was better to spend it with anyone but each other, things had gotten better. There was the memorable Valentine’s Day when he was eight where he’d spent the evening cowering in Tristan’s arms. He still had the book that the man had given him. 

Closing his eyes, Aaron tried to remember what the man had looked like. He tried to push harder on his memory but there was nothing. He pushed to remember the night of his father’s funeral but the only memory he had was longer hair and a face shadowed in darkness. The only face of Tristan’s that he could remember was four year old him. The first time that they met. That face could turn into anything though. There was too much baby fat still on his face to truly know the structure. 

Aaron had entertained the fantasy that the man he’d made out with in the closet had been Tristan but Tristan never would have run from him like that. It had most likely been someone from one of his classes that had gotten scared. Aaron knew the face he showed everyone. He was no nonsense and while he smiled, it was rare. Haley got more smiles than anyone. It wasn’t hard to be happy around her. 

There had been a moment in his life where Tristan had been the only thing he’d seen in his future. In the days and months that followed his father’s funeral. He’d known then that he’d been in love with Tristan but he was gone. Haley made him happy now. Haley was his future and Tristan his past.

The sound of Haley’s laughter drew his gaze up and Aaron watched as she walked towards him, a vision of beauty. He stood to greet her as the maitre’d escorted her over. 

Aaron said a silent goodbye to that which he’d loved as a child and embraced the love of his adulthood.


	18. Summer 1986

Aaron was running where the water lapped at the sand. It was still early in the day but it looked like it was going to be a beautiful day out. He was happy with the vacation even if Haley had come down with some kind of stomach bug two days before. She was getting better but had forced him out of the house that morning telling him not to come back until the early afternoon. That he didn’t need to stay cooped up with her. Even though it was the peak of tourist season at the Hamptons, the beach was empty. 

As he rounded a cove, Aaron saw an older man walking along the beach. Aaron stopped to catch his breath and watched him. There was a movement to his body that Aaron had gotten to know. He was or had been some form of law enforcement. It was the way he carried himself. Aaron could tell that he wore his gun on his right side. The man looked up and saw him, smiling and waving.

“Hello!”

“Hi,” Aaron called back. He watched as the man came closer and closer. He wasn’t exactly dressed for beach weather with his slacks and button up shirt but he looked relaxed. Aaron tried to place his age but the only thing he could guess was he was around fifty.

“Lovely time for a run. Don’t let me bother you!” The man called out. 

There was something though about him and Aaron didn’t want him to go away. “No. I need a break. Been running for an hour already.”

“My, aren’t you a fit minded young man.” The man’s eyes moved down his body but it wasn’t weird. More assessing. There was something else in his eyes. A sadness. “My partner used to run every morning for at least an hour. Now he takes a shorter run in the morning but still it drives me nuts.”

“Not much of a runner?”

“Not without something chasing me,” the man said back with a smile. Aaron took a few steps back from the surf and dropped down to his ass in the sand. The man moved with him and took a seat beside him. He reached down and picked up a handful of sand and let it fall through his fingers. “Never have been.”

Aaron laughed. “What brings you to the Hamptons?”

“Vacation. This is my partner’s favorite place to go.”

“Where is he?”

“At the gym. His knees can’t take the shifting sand to run in. I wanted to watch the sunrise though. What about you?”

“Vacation as well. Here with my girlfriend.”

“Young love.”

“How long have you and your partner been together?”

“Almost three decades. It’s had its ups and downs but it’s so worth it.” The man reached down and grabbed more sand. This time he held it in his hand.

“Aaron,” Aaron said holding out his hand.

“Spencer.” Spencer shook his hand. It was a strong grip with the normal calluses that spoke of extended gun use but also a great deal of writing. “It’s a pleasure to meet you. You look to be around twenty. That means college. What are you studying to be?”

“A lawyer.”

“Oh? I know a lot of lawyers.”

“What do you do?”

“I’m an FBI agent. Behavioral Sciences Unit.”

“I’ve never heard of it.”

“It’s rather new.” Spencer smiled and relaxed back, letting the sand fall out of his hand. “We go after the worst of the worst. We go after the killers like John Wayne Gacy and Ted Bundy.”

“That sounds interesting.”

Aaron listened as the man talked about it. The science behind the behavior and studies that had been done as well as the legal matters. That part brought Aaron into it and he lost track of time. He was having too much fun talking to the man about his job.

“I should go, he’s going to wonder where I am.” Spencer said as he stood up. The water was lapping at their toes and Aaron looked up to see the sun above them. It was after noon already. He hadn’t realized that they had talked that long at all. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize we talked so long.”

“Never apologize for having a good conversation with someone, Aaron. You never know what that person could need. I enjoyed talking to you. It reminded me of when I was your age. All spit and fire and ready to take on the world. Don’t ever lose the passion you have for life and your job, no matter what that job is.”

“I’m very happy with being a lawyer,” Aaron said as he held out his hand for a shake. Spencer shook his hand but the look on his face told Aaron that he didn’t believe him. The older man smiled and waved as he walked away and Aaron watched him until he lost sight of him then he made his way back to the rented beach house. 

Haley was asleep on the couch when he entered. He smiled at her and crouched at her head to kiss her forehead. The fever was gone. Her skin cool to the touch of his lips. She moaned slightly and arched up into the touch. He needed to shower before he carried her into the bedroom for an afternoon cuddle while she napped. This, this and his soon to be job made him happy.


	19. Summer 1987

There were times that Aaron hated being his father’s son and times that he didn't. The DC area knew his father and his legacy as a lawyer. He’d been offered internship after internship. He and Haley had spent night after night going through all of the offers and had picked what they thought was going to be the best for them. Aaron knew what he wanted and while it wasn't exactly what Haley wanted, it would work for them for now.

The DC court system was the perfect place for him and what he wanted. Prosecuting attorney was what he wanted to be and this was the best way to get there. Many of his new colleagues had been opposite his father so they were shocked that he had chosen this as his career path but had welcomed him with open arms. 

Aaron was working on a file when someone sat down at a table across from him. The man waited until he'd finished writing a sentence before shoving a plate with a sandwich on it over the file. 

"Eat, Hotch."

"Thanks. Time got away from me." Aaron looked up into the face of Donaldson, the ADA. 

"I've been meaning to talk to you. I saw your wife the other day."

"Girlfriend. Haley is just my girlfriend." Aaron sighed as he chewed the first bite of sandwich. He hadn't realized exactly how hungry he was. He grabbed his glass of water and washed down the sandwich with a healthy drink. He knew that lawyers who seemed settled into a homelife go up the rank quicker. He had wondered if that was the reason his father had married his mother. He wasn't going to marry Haley though, only because he wanted to get farther in his job. He wanted to marry her and he knew that he wanted to be with her the rest of his life. 

"But the way you look at her. You are serious about her. What's stopping you from putting a ring of any kind on her finger?"

"She wants to wait until she's done with school. I'll propose when she graduates.”

"Good. That's good to have plans. What are her career goals?"

"She was thinking of being a librarian but she does want to have kids." Aaron smiled as he thought about kids. They'd been unable to agree on a number. Aaron wanted at least two while she was quite happy with just one. Aaron figured that once she had the first, she'd come to agree to a second kid. 

"How long have you been dating?"

"Almost two years. I knew though from the first meeting that I was going to marry her." 

"Good. Good. And she's okay with the hours?" 

"Yes." Aaron nodded. Haley knew that he was dedicated to the job and what he wanted out of life.

"You wouldn't believe that amount of women who marry a lawyer because they hope that one day the husband will become a judge and then run for some kind of office. Those marriages never make it to judge or if they do, there is heavy cheating involved."

"No, Haley doesn't think that. She knows what I want to do with my life and why I want to do it." Aaron kept that he hadn't exactly told her everything. There were parts of his childhood that she didn't need to know. Tristan was talked about but he never told her about his unique aspect or that Tristan was the only reason that he had survived childhood as normal as he did. He was fairly certain that she'd put together that his father had been physically abusive. He found it hard to talk about it with her. He'd tried to start so many conversations about it but never had the guts to actually do it. 

"Then I say you have a wonderful woman and don't you let her go."

"Don't worry I won't."

And Aaron knew that he didn't plan on it. He wanted to be with her for the rest of his life as she made him happy. Happier than he'd been since the death of his father. She made the long hours of studying worth it. Just to be able to have someone to look forward to talking to. Everything with her was easy.


	20. June 1988

Aaron sighed as he set down the rifle, pulling his ear and eye protection off his head. He was alone at the local gun range. He enjoyed the silence of the place, only marred by the sound of shot after shot, when others were there. Once he’d found the place after an older colleague mentioned it, he’d come. One could bring their own guns or they could rent one. Aaron always rented. It wasn’t a good idea to own a weapon with so many other students in and out of his and Ben’s apartment. Study sessions ran long and were horrible on keeping things hidden. 

Recently, the summer meant more parties than normal were going on and it was starting to get on Aaron's nerves. Ben was nearing the end of his studies but Aaron was still doing all the studying he could for the bar. It was under a year until he took it and he was worried. He knew that he didn’t need to be worried but he was. The strain of his less than perfect living arrangement was getting to him. He’d tried to talk to Ben, but the man made promises and then didn’t keep them. 

It didn’t take long to take apart the rifle so that the owner could clean it before it was put up for another person to rent and use. He pulled the unused bullets into a little row at the lip of the station. Footsteps alerted him that he wasn’t alone. Looking up he saw the owner walking towards him.

“Hadn’t heard a shot for a few minutes and figured I either needed to check on you or call an ambulance.”

“No. I’m done. Was just doing some thinking.”

“Couldn’t do it while shooting?”

“Oh, I did the majority of it while shooting. This was the end result of it and was taking a little more brain power than normal. Didn’t have to have an accident and ruin your three year streak.” Aaron smiled at the owner and the man laughed back at him. 

“Wouldn’t want to do that. Go ahead and go. I’ll take care of your things. Get on back to your girl.”

“Thanks.” Aaron clasped the man on the shoulder and walked past him. He had a lot of thinking to do. With his internship he’d actually gone out and bought a car. He didn’t want to rely only on the buses to get around the city. 

Aaron drove the long way back to his apartment. He wanted the extra time to think. A for sale sign on a house caught his eye and he looked at it. It wasn’t a house for him but it got him thinking even more. Tactics changed and instead of going back to the apartment he drove around DC to find a house that he thought that Haley would like. She was getting ready to start her senior year and while they agreed no marriage until after he had passed the bar and she was out of school, living together wouldn’t be a big thing. He’d have silence to study and so would she. And they would have each other to come home to. 

Five hours of driving around and Aaron found the perfect house. When he found it he copied the number of the agent down and then drove to get Haley. He looked at the time on his watch and knew that she’d be done with her tutoring that she was doing over the summer to local kids who needed help in English. This was the first summer that she had stayed in the DC area over summer break and her reasons to her parents had been the tutoring and how it would look good on anything she did from there out. In reality, she’d confessed to him that she didn’t want to be away from him for the whole summer. She knew between his internship and studying if she wasn’t here, she would have to come to see him as the travel time to her parents was horrible. So she’d found an apartment to share with three other girls. 

“Aaron where are we going?” Haley asked after ten minutes of driving but Aaron just smiled and reached over to hold her hand. The sun was just getting ready to set when they pulled up in front of the house. It was smaller than the home he had grown up in but it was perfect for them. He could see them starting a family in it and being happy there together. “Aaron.”

“I have the money to buy the house. My trust fund was fully open to me on my twenty first birthday and I have the money from father’s insurance. I’m getting sick of the apartment with Ben. Too much noise and too many people in an out. I can still do study groups elsewhere but this would be just you and I. It’s not that bad of a bus ride from campus and we could even see about getting you a car if you wanted. I didn’t have the best childhood, Haley but I want to be happy with you and this…this house would make me a lot happier. A place to call our own. We don’t have to get married. I’m okay living with you before we get married.”

“It’s a smart idea. Dad’s not going to like it but he might feel better if I had a ring on my finger. So how about we get engaged? We won’t set a wedding date but what if we just do it so that people won’t talk?” Haley asked. 

Aaron nodded as he saw the intelligence of it. It was a really good idea. An engagement ring was no bigger than moving in together. If it made her family happier, he would do it. “So, should I call the agent?” 

“Yes.” Haley smiled at him and Aaron pulled her close for a kiss. She moved to straddle him in the seat and he wrapped his arms around her to hold her close while they kissed. This…this right here was happiness for him.


	21. Spring 1989

Aaron let himself into the front door of his childhood home. His mother had called and asked for him to meet her there. He was tired from taking the Bar Exam but he’d done it anyway. Tom was away for a few days but Aaron wasn’t worried. He looked around. It was empty of pretty much all furniture. He moved towards the back, what looked out over the woods at the back of the property. The large windows looked weird with no plants hanging in them and no chairs for looking out at the world scattered around. 

The woods looked exactly the same and Aaron could almost see himself and Tristan running and playing in them. He unlocked and pushed the doors open, taking in the crisp cold air of spring. His feet moved him across the lawn and into the trees with an ingrain knowledge of where he was going. 

The hideaway looked exactly the same. The box of things for Tristan to use was still sitting where it had been, Aaron noted when he opened the front flap tarp. The rope used to tie them down had been replaced but Aaron figured that Tom had done it. The fuel for the lantern was full and sitting where it had been outside the little hideaway. The lantern was up on top of the box of blankets. Aaron moved it off to look inside. He couldn’t remember what it had looked like before. He forgot how small the hideaway actually was and wondered how adult Tristan had been comfortable that night, holding him close and reading. 

Stains on the floor drew his gaze and Aaron reached down to touch them. He cocked his eye to the side as he realized it was a crust of something. Using a short nail, Aaron scratched at it until it flaked away. He brought a few bits of it up and saw that it was dried blood. Had to have been an animal. Something had tried to hide in here after getting hurt. Brushing his hand on his pants he got rid of the blood and backed out of the hideaway. 

“Aaron?” Sean called out and it scared Aaron and he nearly fell to his ass as he escaped the hideaway. He tied the tarp shut before he stood up.

“Coming!” Aaron called out. He was shocked that Sean was there. It was a weekend and he figured that Sean would be hanging out with his friends. It was his brother’s senior year of high school and he knew that Sean had been jumping around on exactly what major he wanted to be. Aaron wasn’t shocked. Sean rarely had to make a tough decision. 

When he broke the tree line, Aaron saw that Sean had gone inside and was standing with their mother in what had been her sitting room once upon a time.

“Aaron,” his mother called when he stepped into the house and shut the door behind him. She stepped up and kissed his cheeks before pulling him into a very loose hug. Aaron wrapped his arms around her and gave her just as loose of a hug. “Have you got the results of the Bar Exam yet?”

“No. I won’t know until later.”

“Oh. Well, anyway. Sean has changed his mind on what he wants to do again and he’s also changed schools. He’s gotten accepted at Harvard and he wants to become a lawyer like your father and you. So I don’t need the townhouse. I was wondering if I could move back here?”

“Here?” Aaron asked. He figured that she would never want to step foot in the house again. 

“Yes. Downtown DC was fun for a while but without Sean, I’m going to get lonely and all my old friends live in this area. I don’t want to buy the house from you but you have that house that you and Haley live in and well it’s nice but you aren’t going to want to bring her here to leave. I’d take care of the taxes and anything that comes up. I think that I just want a bit of familiarity with my baby leaving the nest.”

“Mom,” Sean whined.

Aaron looked at his mother. He couldn’t tell her no. He really couldn’t. He wasn’t using the house and Tom had said that no renters had been wanting it. 

“Of course. Tom is away for a few days but I’ll get a new set of keys made for you. We had a renter that left with the keys and didn’t give them back so the locks on all the rooms and doors have been changed. If I go now, I might be able to find a locksmith open in DC. Do you want me to drop them off to the townhouse?”

“The townhouse is fine dear. I’ll start seeing about getting a cleaning staff lined up. Thank you dear. Coming back home just might be the thing that I need.”

Aaron nodded and waved for his mother and Sean to leave in front of him. When he was sure that the house was all locked up, Aaron exited the front door and found that Sean was gone but his mother was still there.

“Sean worries about me being in DC alone. I think this will make him happy. He has happy memories in the house.”

“He’s the only one,” Aaron said lowly. His mother just gave him a wan smile. 

“The bad memories have started to fade for me. I don’t remember them as strong as I do the good ones. Your father and I had a good many years of happiness in this house.” His mother went to the car that was waiting with a driver in the front seat. He nodded at the man and the man nodded back. He had no clue who the man was but since the death of his father, his mother had been using a car service for things that a taxi couldn’t be used for. 

Aaron kept his mouth shut as he unlocked his car door and opened it. He waited for his mother’s car to pull out and get out of eyesight before he turned back to the house. He couldn’t ever see himself happy there. There was something though that made him not want to sell it. Something making him keep it.


	22. Summer 1989

Aaron had always known that he was smart. He’d been at the top of his graduating class at Hargrave, GWU, and Georgetown. Passing the Bar Exam had been something that he hadn’t worried about. It was getting the best score that he could. He’d looked at the results of the essay first. No where near perfect but one of the highest scores he’d ever seen. The results of the test though had made him smile. He’s aced. A perfect score. Something unheard of. He knew that scores like that would open doors for him. More doors than being his father’s son would open. He just hadn’t expected this.

Aaron was sitting second chair to a big court case that had been in the works for months. He’d gone from internship to junior prosecuting attorney in shorter time than it took for most new lawyers to get even a job as a lowly clerk. It wasn’t hard to get used to the new way of his life. Haley was crazy happy for him. She was excited for what it meant for them. 

Smartness hadn’t been able to save the case that he first worked on. He watched as a lawyer who reminded him of his father used charisma and misleading statistics to baffle and confuse the jury to get the man who had been on trial for killing his wife and kids off. The jury had reasonable doubt and the man could never be tried again for the crime. It was horrible and it made him ache. He didn’t want to go home to Haley. To have her greet him with a smile on her face and a meal that was ready. He did call and tell her that he would be late and that she needed to eat as he didn’t know when he was going to be home. It wasn’t a lie. He didn’t know when he’d be able to go home. To face the warmth and happiness that was there.

Instead he found himself sitting at a bar he’d never been in before, but it was a place that no one would ever look for Aaron Hotchner in and that was what he wanted. Thinking back though, he should have known that someone would find him. It just wasn’t anyone that he ever thought it would be. 

“Bourbon and whatever my friend is having,” a familiar voice said and Aaron turned to look. It was the guy, Spencer, from the beach at the Hamptons. Aaron watched him take the seat next to him. Spencer opened his wallet and pulled out a hundred dollar bill. Aaron saw a picture of a little girl who looked to be around five with two young men. 

Spencer caught him looking and smiled. “My son and his partner with their daughter, Candace.”

“So he’s gay like you?”

“No. We are both bisexual. He had a girlfriend all through high school and the start of college. She broke his heart when she married for money and dropped him like a bad habit. His partner was his best friend growing up and while he was helping to pick up the pieces, they fell in love. Been together for almost ten years now. His partner is gay though. Never looked at a woman in a sexual way in his life.”

“A very open and accepting family you have.”

“Yes.” Spencer closed his wallet and pocketed it. Leaving the change from the drinks on the table. “So…bad case?”

“How did you guess that?”

“Because when I last saw you, you were happily in love and on vacation. Given what we talked about you’d be just about passing the Bar. And no one from your social class comes here unless they want to forget.”

“Yet here you are.” Aaron knew he was being an asshole but he didn’t care. He wanted to be left alone. Spencer only took a sip of his drink and set it back down, staring at Aaron. Aaron stared back. He wasn’t going to back down. Aaron stared and stared and the other man just stared back at him. The intensity of the gaze looking at him told Aaron that this man was used to doing a battle of the wills with someone who was a lot stronger than Aaron. All that meant to Aaron was that he needed to get better at it. The brown eyes staring into his own were hard as steel and Aaron couldn’t do anything but look away. 

“I saw you come in here and thought that it was you. You looked so defeated.”

“Lost a case. I was second chair but it was my first case.”

“What lost it?”

“Excuse me?” Aaron wasn’t sure what he was talking about. 

“Was the defense better? Were the facts of the case lacking? Was it the first chair, was he not good enough?”

“No. It was the case. It was weak. The prosecutor thought that he could convince the jury with what he had but it was sorely lacking in a lot of departments.”

“It was obviously a local case so that means that the police didn’t do a good enough job getting all that you needed to win the case. You came into the case, I’m sure, after it had already been thrown onto the docket and such. But remember that a case is only as strong as it’s facts. If you don’t have all the facts, you are going to lose.”

“That’s…remarkably simple and very true.”

“The BSU builds strong cases and the only time that those criminals are not thrown in jail is when the lawyers mess up. This case though sounds like it was over before it began. It’s now always going to be the case.” Spencer drained his bourbon and smiled at Aaron. “Keep working on that glare, you almost had me there. Have a good night, Aaron.”

The man was up and gone before Aaron could even think to say a thing. He wasn’t exactly sure what had happened there. Still he drained his drink and then downed the one that had been bought for him. He wasn’t in a condition to drive and was thankful that he’d taken a cab to the bar. He’d call a cab and go home. He’d cuddle with his fiancé and let the worries of the day go away until the sun rose again. He wasn’t going to lose a case like that ever again. He’d make sure that every case he touched had everything needed to put the person away or he’d not take it. He knew it was cocky and upstart but he didn’t care. He’d rather pass on the case than lose it and the person never get put away for what they did.


	23. December 1990

Aaron wasn’t sure what to think as he entered the hospital. Sean was at Harvard and was in no shape to come to DC quickly. Aaron wasn’t going to drag him out of his studies until he knew for a fact that she was on death’s bed. The front desk directed him to the floor he needed. ICU. Growing up, he couldn’t remember a time that his mother had ever gotten sicker than a cold. The only time he remembered her being in the hospital was when Sean had been born.

The doors to the ICU were open so Aaron slipped inside. He found her room and looked inside. She was so small. Even as a grown up his mother had seemed so big compared to him. The doctor on the phone had admitted that she’d been in the hospital for over a week. That they had to respect her wishes that no one be contacted. It was only when she slipped into a near coma that they had been able to call her next of kin. The doctor hadn’t gone into what was wrong with her but that she was not doing well at all.

“Mr. Hotchner?” A doctor asked. 

“Yes.” Aaron stepped into the room when the doctor waved him in and once the other man was in the room, the door was pulled shut.

“I don’t know what you know of your mother’s habits in life.”

Aaron looked at the man a little shocked. He’d never been around her a lot. 

“She’s drank heavily for years and it seems that in the time since your brother Sean has gone off to college, her drinking has just gotten worse. Her liver is damaged and even if she lives long enough, she won’t be approved for a transplant with the drinking. We have a DNR on file for her but in all likelihood, even if she wakes up, she’ll die from the next thing that gets her sick.”

“She…I never knew that she drank that much. I was in boarding school from seventh grade and up.”

“I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, Mr. Hotchner but if she survives the night, she's still not going to live very long after. No one is going to throw you out. Sit with her. She’s out of it and I wouldn’t be surprised if she just slips off into sleep.”

“Is she in pain?” Aaron asked.

“No.” The doctor clasped his shoulder and left the room. Aaron pulled a chair to her bedside and sat down. She was thin. So much thinner than what she had been the last time he had seen her. He wondered why none of her staff had told him. Why Tom hadn’t told him. Haley was at home asleep. He’d woken her to tell her that his mom was in the hospital and when she had wanted to come, he’d pushed her off. He had needed to do it alone. 

If his mother made it to morning, Aaron would call Sean and have him come. He didn’t want to have his brother rush through the night to get there only for her pass before he got there. He reached up and did something that he hadn't done in the length of his memory. He grasped his mother’s hand and held it. He leaned forward to rest his head on their clasped hands. He could do this for her. 

No matter his feelings towards her. He could be there for her at the end. He didn’t know how long he sat there, listening to the machines beep and the oxygen of her mask hiss. Her hand tightened and his head shot up. Her eyes were open and he stood up and leaned over her. 

“Mother, I’m here. It’s Aaron,” he said as her eyes tracked around the room. Her heart monitor started to beep and a nurse rushed into the room. He was on the opposite side from it so he was able to stay. The nurse frowned at him and shook her head. 

His mother’s eyes moved back to him and she tried to remove her mask. The nurse removed it and his mother smiled. Aaron smiled down at her. 

“I love you…” His mother said and Aaron opened his mouth to speak when she started again. “I love you so much, Sean.” Then her eyes closed and she was gone. Aaron stood there holding her hand as it went lax. He barely felt it as he was pulled away from her. He only came back to himself when the door to the ICU was shut on him as the doctor and another nurse entered the room. He found a chair down the hall and dropped down into it. He barely noticed that another man was sitting in the chair beside it until he near fell into him. 

“Sorry.”

“It’s fine. You look like you needed to sit down before you fell.” The man turned towards him but Aaron didn’t look up at him. He just looked down at the hand that had been holding his mother’s when she died. “Do you need something?”

“No. I’m fine. Or I will be I just need to wrap my head around what just happened.”

“And what just happened?” 

Aaron sighed. Taking in a lungful of air and then exhaling slowly. “My mother just died and I don’t know what to think about it.”

“Given that you are not a sobbing mess, I’m going to assume that things were not the best with her?”

“No. And she called me my brother when she died.” Aaron didn’t know why he was spilling his guts to a complete stranger. He watched though as a hand moved into his line of sight. The man was wearing some long sleeved shirt with his watch over the sleeve. Aaron looked at the watch. It had only been two hours since he’d arrived at the hospital. 

“She was probably totally out of it. You don’t need to pay attention to that.”

“Sean and I look nothing alike. We really don’t. No one can confuse us for each other. I just…” Aaron dropped his head into his hands and startled when he felt a hand on his back, rubbing. Aaron let the touch happen. This wasn’t the time or the place to draw attention to himself and if he was at all honest with himself, it felt good. This man didn’t know him from Adam and wouldn’t ever see him again. Wouldn’t know him from a beggar on the streets. “God, I’m free.”

“Free?”

“I hate my job. I’ve come to hate my job so much. I feel like I am not doing enough but I spent so many years becoming what I am that it would have felt like failure in mother’s eyes if I had stopped being it.”

“What do you hate about it?” the man asked.

“I feel like I’m doing too little too late. I’m closing the barn door after the horses have escaped.”

“What can you do to repair that door before they escape then?” 

Aaron thought back to Spencer and the BSU. Going after those who did the most harm. Catching them before they did the most harm. He knew that he had to get into the FBI first and do at least a little time in something else before he’d be allowed in. The BSU had become an elite unit but he could bide his time. 

“You are pretty smart,” Aaron said still not looking up from the hand in his vision. He reached out and tapped at the watch. “Thank you. I think that I really needed that.”

“You are very welcome. Now I had better get going home.” The man stood up and Aaron’s eyes followed him but he didn’t turn and all Aaron could see was his back and the sling. 

“What happened to you?”

“Shot by a very bad man but I killed him. Work kept me out of town but my doctor forced me in for a checkup when I got back, which was an hour ago. I came up to read to a little girl who is a few rooms down. She’s waiting on a lung transplant. He always tells me when someone is here that needs a little cheering up.”

“All around hero huh?” Aaron asked with a true smile on his face. He moved to stand up but the man started away from him. Aaron reached out but the man was gone. He wanted to go after him but he saw his mother’s doctor walking towards him with paperwork. He had so much to do. He’d have to have his mother’s will executed. Take care of her things at the house. Make sure her staff found other jobs and was paid enough to live until they did. He had to call Sean. Arrange a funeral. His first call was going to be to his boss though. He’d need a few days off. Thoughts swirling in his head, Aaron started to sign the paperwork that the hospital needed.

He’d never cared about the expectations of his parents but he’d still done what he thought would make them proud or in the case of his father piss him off. The death of his mother showed him that he needed to live for himself and do what made him happy. And that wasn’t sitting in a courtroom day after day. Once his obligations with his mother’s estate were handled, he was going to figure out when the next round at the FBI academy started and join up.


	24. Summer 1991

Aaron waited for the red light to flash to tell him it was clear for him to start to take his shots. His eyes tracked the flag that was telling him from which direction the wind was blowing as well as how strong. There were barely any ripples which told him it wasn’t blowing hard. He sighted through his scope again and waited. Today’s target was wearing a light green shirt. He could see the movement of the other dummies as they moved along their set tracks. A flash of green had Aaron moving the sight of the rifle that direction but the hair color was wrong. Black haired in a green shirt was his target not blond in a green shirt. He waited two more minutes before the next green shirt moved into sight. He only paused for two seconds to take in the femininity of the target before he fired. The only area that he could get a clean shot on was the head. The bullet ripped through the dummy’s head. He watched as all the dummies on the track stopped and he waited. His eyes never leaving the sight and his finger still curled around the trigger of his gun. 

Lights flashed to tell him that someone was on the course so Aaron quickly released the trigger and flipped the safety back on. When he stood up to start taking his rifle apart he saw his main weapons instructor standing off to the side, along with another man. Aaron had seen him in the halls but had never figured out who he was. 

“Trainee Hotchner, this is John Michaels.”

Aaron knew exactly who he was then. He wiped his sweaty hand on his pants before holding his hand out for the shake that was expected. Even those in the academy knew that he was next in line for the Associate Assistant Director spot. 

“Sir,” Aaron said as they shook hands. 

“Hotchner, top of your class. Frank tells me that you are a wonderful shot. I’ve seen your scores from Hargrave, that’s not a surprise. SWAT teams that need a new member are low but we have a request for you. One team really wants you.”

“Where?” That a team was requesting him was a good thing. He wasn’t being placed, he was being picked.

“Seattle. Effective the day of graduation.”

“Yes, Sir.” His instructor and the soon to be Associate Assistant Director walked away with no more words to him. Seattle. Almost as far away from Virginia as one could get while still inside the contiguous states. 

Aaron let his mind only take in the thoughts of what he had to do. Graduation was just days away. His rifle was stripped and cleaned before it was put back together and put up until the next person needed it. He had actually been done at the academy for hours but with no one to go home to, Aaron hadn’t found the want to go home except to collapse into bed. 

When Aaron had left his job as attorney, Haley and he fought and fought. By the time he had actually joined the academy, they were on the outs. She wanted space and time and Aaron was more than willing to give it to her. He’d convinced her to stay in the house while he’d gone to stay at his childhood home. It wasn’t the best option but he didn’t want to set up somewhere when he could be leaving at the end of his time at the academy. Tom had been happy to have him there no matter the amount of time he actually spent there. 

“Everything okay, Aaron?” Tom asked after Aaron finally got out of his car.

“Of course. Got my marching orders. I’ll be going to Seattle to be a part of their SWAT team.”

“That’s great. And have you talked to Miss Haley yet?”

“No. I’ll do it tomorrow.”

Aaron smiled at Tom and waved before going into the house. There was a plate of food in the oven for him, left over from Tom’s own dinner. The man had moved into the house not long after Aaron’s mother had died. He’d never gotten married, he adored the grounds and to him it was more than worth it. There was a small room that Aaron had paid to have converted on the ground floor for him. 

When Aaron had come back to the house, he’d gone right back to his old bedroom. He’d moved in his adult things but hadn’t wanted to use the master bedroom a floor down or any of the other rooms. When he laid down for the night, Aaron was exhausted but happy.


	25. Fall 1993

Aaron smiled as he let himself into his new apartment. Tom had found it for him and had all of his things moved from the house into it before he’d even finished closing up his apartment in Seattle. Everything was perfect and he was in love with the location. He hadn’t brought much with him from Seattle. His apartment had been furnished and he’d not bought much that he’d cared to bring home with him. His newer wardrobe of suits and the letters that Haley had sent to him over the two years were the only thing he’d brought back outside of pictures. 

The ring of a phone had him looking around. He found the base on the desk in the corner of the living room.

“Hotchner,” Aaron answered.

“Aaron, just wanted to make sure you got into the apartment just fine.”

“Everything is perfect here, Tom. Thank you so much. This made moving back home so much easier.”

“Anything for you, Aaron. You know that. Get some sleep. Get to go be a big bad FBI Profiler tomorrow.”

“Have a good night.” Aaron hung up when the man said his goodnights as well and then Aaron got himself ready for bed. There was a three hour time difference between Seattle and DC and he needed to be fresh and ready for reporting to work at Quantico in the morning. 

Stepping foot into the BSU bunker, Aaron smiled as he saw the man he’d met and worked with on a case that was still unsolved. When he’d done the interviews for the position he’d met with Jason Gideon and Max Ryan, who he was technically replacing. He wasn’t sure what to think of either man. He liked Rossi better. He knew that he’d be doing paperwork and case write-ups until he got used to things. The unit was a little bit different than other units. He’d be working solo more than with anyone else, at least once they trusted him to work alone. 

“Hotchner!” Rossi called out and Aaron tracked his eyes around the room until he saw the man, making his way towards him. “Glad you found the bunker okay.”

“Yes, Sir. You can call me Hotch. It’s less of a mouthful.”

“Hotch. Get that nickname in school?”

“At Hargrave.” 

“Your desk is here.” Rossi pointed at a mostly cleaned off desk. There was a pile of files and Aaron looked at them with an interested eye. “Those are the files we want you to read and then you and me are going to do some talking.”

“A question?” Aaron asked.

“Bathroom is over there,” Rossi said as he pointed to a corner. He pointed to a different corner. “Coffee is over there. If it’s under a cup left, make a new pot. Please.”

“Thank you but that wasn’t what my question was going to be. I met someone from here one time. A man named Spencer.”

“Spencer? Never been anyone in the unit with a first or last name of Spencer.”

“Oh. I must have got the units mixed up then.” Aaron dropped his briefcase at the side of the desk and pulled out his chair to sit down. Rossi walked away and Aaron allowed his thoughts to turn to the man he’d met twice now who had lied to him about where he worked. What use was there in lying to him? Why would the man tell him that he worked in the BSU? Pushing the thoughts away he opened the first file and started to read. 

Hours later, Aaron sighed as he leaned back in his chair. There were a few people scattered around but Rossi had left for the day as well as Ryan, but Gideon was looking over files at his desk. He still wasn’t exactly sure about the man. There was just something a little off putting about him. The growling of his stomach seemed to echo around the room and Gideon looked up. 

“Better go feed that. Pack up for the day, Hotch. Tomorrow’s another day and your brain will thank you for it.”

“I will.” Aaron quickly cleaned up his desk area to where it looked less like a bomb went off and then headed out. Instead of taking food back to his lonely apartment, Aaron stopped at a diner and ate dinner. The hustle and bustle of the people around him gave the impression that he wasn’t lonely. 

While he’d been in Seattle, after the first two months, he hadn’t allowed himself to miss Haley. There was nothing that could be done about it. It was at the fourth month mark that he received his first letter from her. She’s gone to the house to get the address from Tom. The letters were innocent, nothing more than the description of what was going on in her life. Aaron always wrote back, his letters were shorter but he always closed them with his love. He knew that Jessica had moved in with her while she was trying to find a job after graduating college. 

Dinner eaten and mind tired, if not body as well, Aaron stepped into his apartment and dropped his briefcase inside the door. He moved towards the couch and laid down on it, not even taking off his suit jacket. Once he was down he did toe off his shoes and then closed his eyes. He was almost asleep when he thought that sleeping in his suit was not going to be a good idea. Instead he pushed himself up to see that there was a message on his answering machine. He pressed play when he’d tipped forward enough to reach it.

“Aaron, it’s Haley. Tom gave me your new number when I went out to give him some cookies today. I hope that your first day at the BSU went well. I know that we’ve talked about what we wanted to do when you got back and I know that I was on the fence but I’m not anymore. I’m not saying that I want to jump back into where we were but I would love to go out with you. Dinner this week, sometime. Whatever day works for you. Just please call me. I love you.”

Aaron sat on the couch, just staring at the machine. His friends from Seattle had told him that he was an idiot for only signing a three month lease on his apartment but at the moment, he felt like he’d made the right choice.


	26. September 1997

Aaron spun Haley around the dance floor again with the crowd of family and friends watching. Their first dance as a married couple was almost over. Aaron never wanted to let her go though. His eyes tracked over the crowd and he found all smiling faces. Everyone was known to him. 

The song ended and Haley moved over to dance with her father as her mother came to dance with him. He guided his new mother-in-law around the dance floor. When dinner was served, Aaron was tired from dancing with nearly every woman there, single or married. There had also been the dance with seven year old Riley, who wanted to dance with him after he’d danced with Haley. He was a boy who Haley’s cousin had adopted the year before. Aaron had been going around the dance floor with Jessica when he’d seen the boy crying. His new father had been adamant against him dancing with Aaron but the rest of the family thought that it would be cute. Jessica had smiled and left him on the floor, alone while she went over and fetched the boy. His father let him go since he thought that Jessica was going to dance with him. 

When Riley had been handed off to Aaron, the father had nearly blown up but the family had presented a united front and stopped him. Haley had made the comment that her cousin was probably going to be divorcing him. Aaron vowed in that moment to help her and to make sure that she retained custody of Riley. 

A late comer to the wedding had caught Aaron’s eye in the church. He looked familiar but Aaron hadn’t been able to place where he knew him from so he figured it was a distant cousin of Haley’s. His side of the family was sorely lacking but then only Sean was there. The rest of his guests were from his college days, former friends from the prosecutor’s office, and newer friends from the FBI, along with Tom. The man stayed at the edges of the reception and Aaron saw him on and off throughout the night. 

It was gifts time and some of the guests had already started to leave. Since they already lived together their wedding registry had been full of things like picture frames or kitchen things that were expensive that she didn’t want to buy but hoped other people would get for them. It was a great deal of odds and ends that finished out their home. Then there was just a single present left. Haley opened the card that was with it and frowned when there were just initials telling them who it was from. STR. Aaron knew no one with those initials but the card was addressed to them. 

Aaron opened the box and found a set of books. Classics, first edition classics at that. There were several that Aaron loved and the rest were ones that Haley loved. There was also a lilac purple tie for Aaron and a lovely pale pink purse for Haley. She oohed and awed over it. Aaron lifted out the tie and found that it was a lovely silk and handmade. It was beautiful. No one there claimed the gift and the only person that was gone was the young man who Aaron had thought was Haley’s cousin.

When he described the man to her, she said that it wasn’t anyone of her family, that she’d thought it was a co-worker of his, past or present. It had to have been him that gave them the gift. 

The pictures from their wedding day were waiting for them when they got home and both of them combed over the pictures to try and find one of the man who had given them such a grand gift. Aaron knew exactly how much each of those books had to have costed and the tie and purse were no small thing either. There were no pictures of him. The closest that they got was a shot of the back of his head when he was leaving as they started to open presents. 

Aaron spent a few weeks obsessed about it. His job had turned him a little paranoid but when he’d described the man to Gideon and Rossi, there had been no recognition on their part. Still the tie went into the closet and as much as he was tempted to wear it he didn’t. He had the reminder every single day that he opened his closet and saw it but he lost interest in figuring out who had given it to them. Nothing happened over the weeks and then months.


	27. Summer 1998

Aaron almost turned to head to the bunker when he drove onto the base. He had to catch himself and turn towards the academy proper. He wasn’t used to the new offices yet. Dave had retired not too long after the wedding and Aaron had been happy for him up until the entire BSU had gone through a makeover and it was still happening nearly a year later. Gideon was Unit Chief but a lead profiler had not been named at all. It was grating on everyone, coupled with the move. 

His desk was exactly as he’d left it the night before except there was a note on it to go see Gideon as soon as he got in. Aaron looked up to the man’s office and sighed when he saw that he wasn’t in there. He wasn’t going to go chasing after the man. He’d sit and work on paperwork until Gideon decided to grace them with his presence. It was easy to get lost in the paperwork and the only reason that he knew that Gideon had come back was he raised voice in his office. Aaron looked up and saw that he was on a cell phone. That meant something to do with the CIA so Aaron stayed where he was. 

When the door opened an hour later, Aaron was making his way back to his desk with a cup of coffee so he moved right up into Gideon’s office, knocking as he entered.

“Hotch, good. The committee has made their decision on who they want to be lead profiler.”

“Good.” Aaron wanted to know who was being brought into the unit from outside.

“They wanted me but I have no want to be both Unit Chief and lead profiler so they had to go back to the drawing board so to speak. Dave was consulted as well and so the committee would like if you would become the new lead profiler.”

“Me?” Aaron was shocked. He figured it would be someone else brought in that had left the unit. People who had moved elsewhere for other reasons but would come back to basically be second in command. 

“It’s been pressed upon us that this unit is an old boy’s club. We are going to be expanding and changing and one of those things is trying to bring in new blood. I don’t have the temperament to be what they want me to be. I’ve never been good at building people up. That’s the other reason that I turned it down. You may be a cold hearted seeming man but we know that you’ll do what needs done. Everyone takes to you better than me. Of course, that means the office is yours. Someone will be by to help you get decorations and shelves and whatever else you need.”

Aaron nodded, grabbing his coffee mug, he started out of the office.

“If you want to take the afternoon to go and tell Haley, just meet with whoever they are sending to talk about the office and then you can go,” Gideon said as Aaron exited the office.

The rest of the morning flew by. Aaron tried to get as much work done as he could. A lovely lady from requisitions came by and they discussed his office. He liked the color as it was so it was just a matter of getting furniture in. She said that it would probably be done before he came back in the morning as the AD wanted to get the Unit going. When he signed the paperwork for her about the furniture, Aaron finally saw the new name of the Unit. Behavioral Analysis Unit. BAU. It was much better than BSU. Aaron was happy to be getting away from being called the BS Unit. When he was done, he grabbed his things and made his way home. He figured he’d be cornered by HR as soon as he got in the next morning to go over the changes. 

Haley was in the kitchen, preparing whatever she was getting ready to stick in the oven for dinner. Aaron watched her for a few seconds. She still had her job at the library and she worked mornings there. Home in time for her to have dinner ready on the nights that he was home. Dinner looked like it wasn’t at a stage where she had to finish it. He hoped that it could be thrown into the fridge and saved for the next day. He wanted to go out and celebrate his new position. 

Stepping up behind her on silent feet, Aaron wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close and burying his nose in her hair. 

“Aaron!” Haley chastised as she tried to turn in his arms. He allowed her to do so after a few seconds. When she was fully turned in his arms, he kissed her. It was a long and deep kiss as once he tasted the sweets she had to have been eating, he couldn’t stop. She allowed the kiss for several long minutes before pulling back. “What are you doing home so early?”

“I accepted the position as lead profiler for the unit!” Aaron said with a big smile on his face. He leaned in again and kissed her, short but with no less happiness and love. When he pulled back, though, he could see that she was upset. “Haley?”

“That means more hours doesn’t it?”

“Yes.” Aaron took a step back from her, a frown starting on his face. He’d talked to her about it when Dave had left the unit. He hadn’t figured that he would get the job then but hopefully when Gideon retired he’d get the job. She knew that his goal was Unit Chief and the stepping stone to that was lead profiler. He loved his job. He’d loved being a lawyer at first but seeing all the horribleness that he was too late to stop had made him angry. His job now stopped some of those people from creating as much horribleness.

“Sometimes. I get less paperwork overall but what I do get is more complex. I thought you would be happy.”

“I’m happy for you, Aaron. I just thought that this was going to be later. More down the road. We’ve not even been married a year.”

“I know.” Aaron pulled her back into his arms, kissing her forehead. It wasn’t hard to forgive her for the little bit of unhappiness. “Let’s go out and celebrate!”

After a lovely dinner out and a little too much to drink on both their sides, Aaron was shocked when Haley just wanted to go to sleep. He showered and when he came out, she was asleep on her side of the bed with her back to him. He crawled into bed and laid there, wanting to touch her but not knowing exactly what was wrong. It took a long time for him to fall asleep.

The next morning dawned way too early and Aaron was up and out of bed long before his alarm was set to go off. He dressed for work and ate a quick breakfast of oatmeal before he went up into their bedroom and kissed Haley goodbye. She barely woke and the muffled words of love sounded exactly as they did every single morning so he pushed the night out of his mind. 

Walking into the bullpen, Aaron looked at his office and smiled. He moved up, had set his briefcase in his chair and then started to move all his things from his desk into the office. It took half an hour to sort it all and get it set up. The bookshelves behind his desk needed to be filled and he knew the books he wanted to put in there. The texts from his law school days as well as some of the other books he’d collected over the years. He also thought about other books that would be a good idea to have in his office to make it a little more personable. He’d have to go back to his childhood home and find some of the ones in the library that he had made sure was bought for him and Tristan. His mind went right to _Empty Planet_ with a smile. He’d make sure to bring it. 

As he sat down in his desk to look at his office, Aaron saw Gideon moving fast through the bullpen. His eyes were locked on Aaron’s office so he got up from the desk to meet him at the door.

“Boston finally called us in on the Reaper. We have to leave now.”

“I’m ready to go.” Aaron would call Haley as soon as he got set up at the field office in Boston. Everyone in the unit had been keeping their eye on the Boston case, wondering when they were going to be called in. Grabbing his go bag, Aaron dashed out of the office. Gideon was on his heels with his own bag. Who knew when they were going to be coming home?”


	28. Summer 2004

When a case allowed it, Aaron liked to go to the graduation ceremony for the academy. It had been over a decade since his graduation, but he wondered what the older agents had thought of him at his own graduation. He’d stand at the back of the crowd and just watch. Seeing the families that were gathered to be happy for the happy occasion. His own graduation had been sorely lacking in anyone watching it. Haley had still been so upset with him that she hadn’t come. Tom would have, he knew, if he had told him. That was part of the reason why Aaron hadn’t told him. Sean hadn’t even come down from Harvard to view it. He’d gotten a short letter from him telling him that he was happy but that was it. 

The names washed over him, going in one ear and out the other but when a young man stepped up on the stage, Aaron was intrigued. The man was familiar but Aaron couldn’t place where he knew him from. His hair was just past his ears and he wore thick framed glasses but there was something about him. Aaron’s eyes scanned the crowd, there was no one waving at him when he stepped off the stage. He was alone there exactly like Aaron had been. His heart went out to him. The young man looked sleight and Aaron wondered exactly how well he’d done on the physical side of the academy. 

The tides were turning at the academy and in the FBI in general. So many were being brought in for their minds. He knew that some standards had been lowered to try and meet the growing tide of intellectuals that were wanting to get into jobs that were mainly desk ones. He knew several people in White Collar Crimes that had been on the edge of failing out when they graduated due to the physical side. People like that would never get into SWAT but there were a lot of jobs that didn’t need the physical people, they needed brains. He wondered if the young man was one of them. 

Tuning into the names, he heard that the class was at the S’s. There wouldn’t be that many left. When it was all said and done nearly half an hour later, Aaron made his way inside the academy. He lectured sometimes when cases allowed it. Gideon kept a bigger presence in the academy but he was the main teacher of the profiling classes. The sound of quick footsteps around a corner had Aaron pulling back so that he wouldn’t run into someone but it wasn’t in time and he and another male collided and the male ended up on the floor. 

Aaron leaned down to give him a hand up when he saw that it was the young man from before. Seeing him up close, Aaron knew that he knew him from somewhere.

“Agent Hotchner!” the young man said. His eyes blown wide in recognition. Aaron was fully shocked at that. That meant that he did know him from somewhere. “I’m sorry, Sir. I was rushing because I needed to get…”

“It’s fine.” Aaron held out his hand and he waited for the young man to shake it. The man moved his hand a few inches over for him to shake and then pulled it back before finally just clasping their hands together and shaking it. Given the hesitance, Aaron had expected a weak handshake but the grip was firm. “What’s your name?”

“Tr…” The young man stopped and swallowed before he spoke again. “Trey, Sir.”

“Trey what?” Aaron asked but the young man’s eyes widened comically before they started to dance left and right. He was looking for an exit. As soon as his eyes landed on something, he took off running. Aaron followed him with his eyes until he rounded a corner and was pressing a hand to his stomach. Worried Aaron followed him. When he rounded the corner the young man was gone but Aaron figured he was in the bathroom so he went there and knocked. He didn’t hear a thing so he entered. Afraid he’d find the young man throwing up in the toilet. What he found was emptiness. All the stalls were open and there was nowhere for him to hide. Worried even more, Aaron checked all the rooms on the hall. The young man was nowhere to be found. 

When he finally exited the main building of the academy, Aaron found Morgan waiting on him. 

“Hey, Gideon tried calling you several times. Said your phone would just ring and go to voicemail. He said I might find you here.”

“Sorry, I had my phone on silent for the graduation ceremony but I forgot to take it back off. Do we have a case?”

“Yes. Atlanta, serial child killer. Third body was found this morning. He wants to be wheels up as soon as we can be.”

“Just need to grab my bags.”

Aaron pushed the newly minted Special Agent out of his mind. If he was sick, someone would find him. He had a job to do and he couldn’t put it off to find a sick agent that wasn’t on his team.


	29. March 2005

Aaron settled into his office chair with a sigh. He looked out into the bullpen and sighed at the sight of Morgan and JJ just sitting on the top of Morgan’s desk, neither of them knew what to do. No one knew what to do. The bombing case in Boston had been JJ’s first on the team and it was a horrible first case to have. Garcia had been on the team only a month more than JJ and she was devastated. 

Gideon was out at his cabin and had been for two weeks now. The whole unit was still in shock with the aftermath of the bombings in Boston and the aftermath of what Bale had done to show himself better than Gideon. So far, until everything was cleared, the team was on stand down. A second set of interviews had been conducted that afternoon of all FBI agents on hand during the case. Aaron himself had spent the last two weeks trying to figure out exactly how they could have stopped what happened. 

“Aaron?” a female voice called out and Aaron had to look up to tell who it was. He was so lost in his thoughts that Strauss had gotten all the way up to his desk without him realizing. 

“What can I do for you?” Aaron asked as he sat up straighter in his chair. His dislike for Strauss stemmed from the fact that she saw him as someone who wanted her spot as Section Chief and he didn’t. That spot had too much politics for his liking. 

“The committee has made its decision and it’s siding with what you and your team have been saying from the start, that it was all just a mess that could never have been unraveled. The ADD is upset about the loss of that genius they were trying to recruit into the unit but he’s pushing for more staffing.”

“We probably could have done with a genius on the team to deal with Bale.”

“Agreed. As the world changes so does the evil that we hunt. Try and think about who you want as an addition to the team. Gideon is going to be gone for at least six months. That’s what he wants. He’s going to teach at the academy when his initial leave is done. You, as of now, are temporary Unit Chief. Everyone across the board has been made aware of this.”

“Thank you for telling me. I’ll make sure that the paperwork is filled out for it.” Aaron could feel her dislike of him. Putting him up to that position put him a step closer to her position. That was something he didn’t want but he couldn’t convince her of it. She’d spent too long fighting men to see that not all of them wanted what she had just because she was a woman. 

“There is a pay raise for the position that will stay in effect if Gideon decides to come back as Unit Chief.”

“Is there anything else?”

“Yes. The ADD wants me to press upon you that maybe a team dinner out will make them feel better. An attempt at normalcy. Analyst Garcia’s already been taken off duty for the day and Agents Morgan and Jareau are waiting for you.”

Aaron looked at the time and saw that it was nearly dinner time. Haley was visiting her parents for the week. She’d quit her job at the library a few years before so that they could focus on having a child. She had found it cloying at first but she found friends in the neighborhood that she hadn’t really made before and she was enjoying having the time now. The second guest room had been set up with things for a child that were still boxed up. A mobile. A crib. Various other things. Her age was a factor but Aaron had been hesitant about children. He’d wanted them long ago but the pressures of the job had made him question his ability to be a parent after the horrible childhood he’d had but working the job had also made him feel better at it as he went along. Working with children over the course of cases showed him that he wasn’t going to neglect his child like his mother had or hit one like his father. He wasn’t his parents and he would love his child no matter what. 

“I’ll do just that. I know a wonderful place to eat at. Have a good day, Chief Strauss,” Aaron said as he stood up. He grabbed his suit jacket and slipped it on before grabbing his briefcase. He’d added two files to look at for a case earlier in the day. He needed something to make his night go by. “Does this also mean that Agent Jareau can try and find us a case tomorrow?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” Aaron stepped out of his office, waiting for Strauss to leave before he shut off the light. 

With a heavy heart, Aaron took his team out to eat that night. He used the credit card attached to his trust fund that still grew at a massive rate each year. His lawyer had made him have Haley sign a prenuptial agreement. In the beginning, she hadn’t minded. It was his family’s money and she had told him time again that she didn’t marry him for his money. In fact, she hadn’t started to get upset until he’d refused to touch it when she wanted things. Oh, when her car finally died he dipped in and bought her a new one. Instead of leasing one or taking a loan out. He made sure that she had what she needed and some of what she wanted. He was never frivolous with his money. He didn’t see a need to be. He didn’t even touch his trust fund for money for his suits. He made enough at his job to keep them going. All of the money he’d gotten from his mother’s life insurance and various other stipulations of her will, he’d put that money in there. 

Aaron kept his mind on the team as they ate dinner, laughing and acting like he didn’t want to be anywhere other than where he was. 

“So, Haley’s out of town. What are you going to do tonight?” Morgan asked as he sipped at his glass of water. Dinner had long been eaten and the evidence of dessert was still scattered on the table. Garcia and Morgan had been talking the most but JJ had chimed in a great deal, Aaron let their words wash over him.

“I actually think that I’m going to go check on my parent’s house.”

“Oh. Are they out of town?” Garcia asked with a smile on her face. 

“No. Father died many years ago and mother over a decade ago. I kept the house as I can’t stand to part with it. I have a gentleman, Tom, who lives there and takes care of it. I go and check on him in person a great deal.” Aaron didn’t mention that he had been going there more and more as his and Haley’s relationship got rockier and rockier. 

“Sean didn’t want the house?”

“He was still a child when father died. Mother didn’t want it so she gave it to me. Sean is uninterested in staying in the area for long periods of time. He has his pre-law degree but has no interest in actually becoming one. He looked up to father and I think that he wanted to follow in his footsteps to try and show his love but his heart wasn’t in it. He was in New York the last I heard, working at a restaurant under a very good chef.”

No one asked why he had followed his father’s steps as well, only to leave. He was thankful that after that the team wanted to leave. It was getting late. He made sure that the team was in their cars headed home before he left the restaurant. It was going to be really late by the time he got to the house but he didn’t care. He felt like he needed to see the man so he drove. When he pulled into the area where he always parked, he found that Tom’s car was gone. Not worried, Aaron got out to at least walk around a little. He easily walked to the front and then moved to the backyard. The flash of a light in the woods startled him a little so he moved closer. The light was sweeping back and forth, back and forth at a low angle. Aaron stopped when he realized why it was familiar. Tristan used to wander the woods at night like that looking for weird things. Aaron made his way into the woods, following the light and trying not to make a sound. It was still pretty cold out at night so he hoped that the boy, or teen, or whatever age he was, was dressed like he should be. He was about fifteen feet away and could see that the boy was small. Without seeing his face, Aaron couldn’t tell his age. He got excited and wasn’t watching where he was going and stepped on a branch and it snapped, the sound was horribly loud to Aaron’s ears. The boy turned and flashed the light right into Aaron’s eyes to where he had to shield them not to be blinded. 

There was silence and then a gasp and the sound of running feet. Aaron lowered his hands to see that Tristan had dropped the flashlight and was running towards the pond. Aaron picked up the flashlight. 

“Tristan! Wait!” Aaron called out but the boy didn’t stop. Aaron took off after him. While his stride was bigger, Tristan knew the woods better than Aaron remembered them and he was able to duck in-between trees that Aaron had to go around. They crossed over the stream that fed the pond and Tristan just kept going. Aaron could barely keep up to him with the light so when the sound of his running feet stopped, Aaron stopped too. He looked around where he had last heard him. There he found the clothes in a pile, he’d gone. Aaron had scared him away. 

Picking up the clothes, Aaron started back towards the hideaway. He shook out the clothes and put them up for the boy the next time he came. He saw new things inside. He remembered younger Tristan telling him that he’d bought clothes and that older Tristan made sure that there was money. He wondered exactly where Tristan was going for the clothes and the money, because there wasn’t a bit of clothes for an adult in there. He wondered then if older Tristan had a different hideaway for his things, just to be safe. 

Sitting down, Aaron flicked off the flashlight and laid it on the bookshelf. Tristan had never run away from him. Why had he done it that night? What was he going to do in his future that made Tristan scared of him? Was there any way to change it? He closed his eyes to think and didn’t realize that he’d fallen asleep until he woke up the next morning. 

A note from Tom was at his side, he realized as he pulled the blanket off himself. Tom was telling him to come up for breakfast but Aaron wasn’t feeling like it. He felt like he was intruding here. This was a place for Tristan now. Tristan had better memories than him. He needed to leave this place to him.


	30. Fall 2005

Aaron looked around the boat that they had ended up finding the victim on. She was dead in the cage and both of the UnSubs were in custody but the case had ended horribly. He looked over at Elle Greenaway. The strong woman was looking like she had a broken heart and Aaron understood. It was a horrible outcome for them. There had been no way to get to the girl quicker. They had never cracked the password on the computer. He wasn’t even sure there was a thing on the computer that could help them. 

“Cameras,” Morgan said. Aaron looked where he was pointing and sure enough there were cameras in the ceiling of the room. “I’m having Garcia see if she can track them.”

“Good. Keep me informed. Where’s Gideon?”

“I think he’s outside.”

Aaron moved outside and looked for Gideon only to not see him at all. JJ was there, talking with the local field office agents. When she saw him looking at her, she nodded her head towards the SUV parked to the side of the dock. Aaron moved a few steps over so that he could see inside and saw Gideon sitting in the front passenger seat with his eyes staring straight forward, barely breathing. Strauss had wanted him back for the case, citing pressure from up above but Aaron wondered how much pressure exactly. 

The sound of feet behind him had Aaron turning to look. He found Agent Greenaway walking towards the upper edge of the dock.

“Agent Greenaway, submit your application for the spot on the team again. Under references place my name.” 

Greenaway nodded at him and continued on. Having a female on the team that wasn’t their communications liaison would help make the brass happy and Greenaway was more than qualified. If this was his last decision as temporary unit chief so be it. Looking at Gideon though, he didn’t think that it would be his last. There was something to the way that he was sitting that said that he wasn’t going to come back. 

“He’s not going to be coming back is he?” JJ asked, her eyes were on Gideon as well.

“I don’t know. If we had saved the victim, maybe.”

JJ nodded and turned back to where the LEO and the local agents were talking. “We just need to close up shop and we can go. The Seattle Office is going to take care of everything. The jet will be ready to fly as soon as we get there.”

“Find Morgan and we can head back to the office to pack up. 

The flight back home was dead silent. Morgan had his headphones on and JJ was sitting beside him reading. Gideon was in a corner just staring out of the jet’s window. Aaron though was thinking. 

Haley was pregnant and given her age and how long it had taken for her conceive, she was going to be going onto bed rest at some point. If Gideon didn’t come back to the unit, if the outcome of this case pushed him away, there was little doubt that he’d be made unit chief. That would mean more time at work even when in town. With Gideon gone, Aaron was the last of the staff that had been part of the earlier days. The last who remembered what it was like to work with all three of the legends. Also if he did turn it down and stayed as just lead profiler, who was going to be brought in to replace Gideon? It might only be Morgan, Garcia, and JJ but they were his team and he wasn’t going to leave them, and he wasn’t going to let someone else in. 

When the jet landed, Aaron wasn’t surprised to find Strauss waiting for him. Gideon went right to his car and was gone. The section chief looked at him and he shook his head no. Strauss frowned. 

“Agent Hotchner, your team can leave for the day when their reports are filed. Analyst Garcia has dinner waiting for you, I think. When the reports are done, Agent Hotchner, do you mind bringing them to my office?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Aaron said, and then she was spinning to get into her car.

“Hotch?” Morgan pointed where the lights from Gideon’s car could just be seen. 

“Leave him be, Morgan. Let’s head back to the office and get this over with.”

“Are they going to blame Gideon?” JJ asked. 

“There is nothing to blame. We didn’t have what we needed to close this before her death. We just have to make sure that we tell the truth.” 

The drive to the office was horrible. The car was even more silent than the jet had been. The breaths in and out were the only noises. No one moved. No one did anything. Aaron parked the SUV in the lot and everyone transferred back to their own vehicles before heading up. The bullpen was a ghost town. No one from any of the other teams were there. 

Aaron got to work right away, he had two reports he had to fill out and neither one was exactly going to be fun to do. The first about the case was hard as it was a horrible ending but there had been no way for them to get it done quicker. The only thing that could have got them to the girl was finding out she was on the boat quicker and that could have only happened if they had been able to get into the computer. Lack of ability to do so was something that they couldn’t have predicted. 

“Agent Hotchner?” A voice called out from his door way. Aaron looked up to see an older man standing there, leaning on a cane. He was dressed in a very nice three piece suit that made him look very handsome, despite his age. Aaron put him at around his late sixties, early seventies. “May I come in and talk to you?”

“Sure.” Aaron didn’t like the disruption. He’d finished off the case file but now he needed a report on Gideon. The man smiled and closed the door as he stepped over. He sat down in the chair closest to the door and leaned his cane against the desk. “How may I help you?”

“You just got back from the Seattle. Pair of killers. Jason Gideon’s first case back after the bombing in Boston?” the man asked. 

Aaron narrowed his eyes and sat up straighter in his chair, looking at the man. “Who did you say you were?”

“I never said who I was, Aaron. I could give you my real name but as of yet, you’ve never heard my real name. You knew me as a boy though.”

“Tristan.” Aaron looked over his face; he had to have been wearing contacts because there were no glasses on his face.

“Hello, Aaron.”

“How did you get in here?”

“Visitor’s pass. Wonders happen when you can talk security into letting you in to see your nephew.” Tristan leaned back in the chair and settled down. Aaron could tell that the cane wasn’t just a fashion statement for him, it was something that he needed. Had little Tristan lied to him? Had he been going forward in time instead of back, back then? “I am not going to tell you anything about the past or about the future, that I wasn’t already going to tell you. I just came to talk to you.”

“To talk to me?” Aaron stood up from his desk and moved around to lean against the front of it. Tristan only shifted in the chair to look up at him. “What do you need to talk to me about?”

“I’ve not found a point in my life where I’ve been able to change anything. What happens happens. You have to make the best decision for the team.”

“What decision did I make before?”

“To have Gideon put into a desk job.” 

Aaron rubbed his hands down his face. “Why did you run from me?”

“I’m seventy years old, Aaron. You need to be a bit more specific.”

Aaron opened his mouth but shut it again quickly. He looked at Tristan with a frown on his face. The man only raised an eyebrow in response. 

“You just lied to me.”

“I did no such thing. Do you think a seventy year old man can remember all the times over his life he would have run away from his best friend?” Tristan asked.

Aaron didn’t know how to answer that. He really didn’t. “Best friend?”

“I’ve counted you as my best friend since you showed me how to swim. There had been some years in between where we lost contact but don’t friends sometimes do that? It’s getting to be time for me to go. I just came to see you. Give you a slightly familiar face to tell you to do what your heart says but also what’s best for you and your team.” Tristan used the cane to push himself to his feet. He smiled at Aaron and reached out a hand to cup his face. 

“You look like you miss me now.”

“No. I miss this version of you. Before everything had shaped you into what you become. I will always pick that version though. That Aaron, he’s the best Aaron. You just aren’t there yet.”

Aaron wasn’t sure how to take that. He really didn’t. He stayed leaning against his desk as he watched Tristan leave. He was happy that Tristan was alive. That he had proof that his friend had made it past the age of ten. He wanted to know exactly what had happened. As easily as Tristan had distracted him, Aaron was pretty sure that if that Tristan who had run from him had come to a child Aaron, he wouldn’t have run. He had done something as an adult to scare the kid. He just had to figure out what and not do it between now and then. 

Sighing, Aaron turned back to his work. Hearing Tristan’s words in his head, Aaron looked at what he needed to fill out for Gideon’s return to the team. The man wasn’t ready and he might not ever be. He wrote what he needed and signed it just as Morgan was coming in with his and JJ’s files. Aaron took them and set out to meet with Strauss.


	31. October 2005

Aaron smiled at Jack as he lay in the bed that he’d been placed in. He had a son. That was the words that kept on going through his head, over and over. He had a beautiful son. Haley was asleep and the nurses had taken Jack back to the nursery as he’d been at work. He was waiting on shift change to be over before he could go in and see and hold his son. Jack was in his little bed, kicking in his sleep. 

“Which one is yours?” A man asked.

Turning to look at him, Aaron saw that his eyes weren’t on him but in the nursery. His hair was long and it kind of blocked Aaron’s vision of him and even the glass wasn’t reflecting a good image. The soft shift of clothes had Aaron looking down. A boy of about seven was standing there. Aaron scooted over so that they could have more room. 

“There,” Aaron used his finger to point at Jack. 

“First born?” The man asked next, his face never moving to where Aaron could see him.

“Yes. Jack. We are going to name him Jack.” Aaron saw the smile on the man’s face as he looked into the room where the babies were. “What about you? Second?”

“No. This isn’t my son and it’s kind of complicated but yes, I have a son in there. I won’t go into the details but I love him like he’s mine and that’s the only thing that matters.” 

Aaron could see the faint hint of a smile on his face. The boy was looking through the glass with rapt attention and it was when the boy turned to look at him that Aaron swore for a second that it was Tristan. Was it Tristan?

“Grayson, come on. Your mother is waiting on you,” the man said. He looped an arm around the boy’s shoulder and pulled him away from the glass. “You’ll get to see him later.” 

Grayson waved at the babies in the window and then followed behind the man. When Aaron turned back to the window, a nurse was stepping up to the glass with Jack in her hands. She pointed at the door and Aaron moved towards it. When he stepped up the light above the door flicked to green and he pushed at it. The nurse was stepping into the smaller room. Aaron held out his hands and the nurse laid Jack in them. 

The first thing that he did was bring Jack close to kiss his forehead and then inhale the scent of him. He promised again, as he would every single time that he held Jack, that he’d never hurt him; never make him think that he was unloved. Jack was his treasure and he’d live every day of his life to make his son proud of him and to never lose the love of him. 

“It’s always so nice to see a man so happy to have a child. We get too many here that rarely want to see their children much less visit them every single chance they get,” the nurse said as she handed over a bottle to Aaron. Jack was just starting to fuss a little and Aaron was sure that he was hungry.

“I don’t know when I’ll get called out for work so I am making sure to get as much time as I can with him before I go.” Aaron settled back and Jack latched onto the nipple of the bottle. 

Jack was perfect and his future.


	32. Winter 2005

The sounds of shots fired sounded in the room. Echoing all around him and in his skull. Aaron tried to react, tried to move but he couldn’t, not from his position and not quick enough. Pain seared through his shoulder and then there was screaming. Another final shot fired and Aaron watched from the floor as Dowd went down in a heap. He stared into cold, dead eyes as SWAT finished swarming the room. 

“Dead?” someone asked.

“Two,” someone else answered. Aaron closed his eyes and blanked it all out. He was mad. SWAT had no business coming into the room when there were no eyes in the room. He was going to make sure that whoever gave the order to breach was stripped of the job if they didn’t see something worse happen. 

Dowd’s body was removed from his sight and then soft hands were on his face. He looked up into the worried face of JJ. Behind her was Morgan and Greenaway. Aaron blinked a few times to hopefully correct his vision and then shook his head to get his hearing back. 

“Hotch?”

“I’m fine. It was just loud for a few minutes. Help me sit up.” 

“I don’t think that we should. Hotch, you were shot.”

“Kind of hard to miss that. It went through and through. I want the civilians taken care of first. And I want the commander of SWAT here before the dead bodies are pulled out. I want to hold them responsible.”

“Hotch?” Greenaway asked. 

“They had no eyes in the room and didn’t even try and get ones in here.”

It was hours later that Aaron finally was released into a room. The doctor wanted to keep him overnight even though he wanted to go home. He’d sent Morgan and Greenaway to the hotel and JJ was there with him. She was working on the press release for the team and the situation that had sprung up. The death of two hostages because of what SWAT did was looking bad but thankfully it was all on the Des Moines police for that. 

“Hotch, I have the ADD on the line,” JJ said as she handed over the phone. Aaron cocked an eyebrow.

“Sir?” Aaron asked as he placed the phone at his ear.

“We are sending a press team to Des Moines to deal with it. I want you and your team out of the news. This is not a reflection on you or Agent Jareau, this is a reflection on how much Des Moines SWAT has messed up. I want the BAU pushed away from it. Agent Jareau said that the doctor might release you tomorrow. I want you on the jet as soon as you are released. The official statement is that the team is getting called back to deal with an active case.”

“And is there a case?”

“There is. If you are cleared for non-field duty by the medics, you can observe and help from the station. If you are not cleared for that we can work something out. You have a child at home and I think that Morgan, Greenaway, and Jareau can handle a case alone.”

“Yes, Sir. I’ll keep you informed.” Aaron heard the click on the other end of the line and looked at JJ. 

“He called me.” JJ took her phone back and looked at him shock. 

“I’ll be fine here. I’m assuming he told you the same that he did me. Tell the team and we’ll go from there in the morning. When you guys come back bring my go bag. I’ll be fine alone.”

“I know. I’ll be here at dawn. With clothes and a nice pressed suit.”

Aaron smiled at her as she nodded and left. When she was gone with the door shut, he leaned back in the bed. He’d taken the strongest non narcotics they’d give him because he’d wanted to be at the top of his game when dealing with the press but since he’d been pulled from that, he clicked the button for the nurse.

An hour later, Aaron was lying in bed near floating. Whatever the doctor had given him was helping him feel better. The pain was gone and he was near asleep. The door opened but Aaron didn’t see anyone in the doorway and it shut again. All of the machines were on one side of the bed and the sound of soft footsteps padding around the other side had Aaron tipping his head that way. He saw a mop of hair and then Tristan was pulling his way up onto the bed with him. He sat there at his side and just looked at him. He was small, like his four year old self had been. Aaron reached out to touch his face but as his finger would have brushed skin, Tristan disappeared. The tiny hospital gown he’d been wearing left with him. Like he’d never been there. 

It hadn’t been Tristan but a trick his mind was playing on him.


	33. January 2006

Aaron looked at his team. Smiling as he did so. Morgan was gripping Billie tight in his arms as he carried her out of the house. He looked at Prentiss with a look of satisfaction. It was her first case on the team and she’d already proven Strauss wrong. The section chief hadn’t wanted to add her to the team given that she’d been brought in by Greenaway after a night of drinking, but Gideon needed replaced and she would work to have a body on the team. 

Prentiss’s idea to call the Crimes Against Children Unit to figure out if the suspected UnSub was on their radar at all. There had been enough to get a warrant to search the house for child pornography and in that search; Morgan had found Billie in the attic. 

“Good call, Prentiss!” JJ said as she moved over to where Prentiss was standing beside Morgan. Billie was on a stretcher. The Copelands were going to have a rough time of it, dealing with the fallout of Billie being taken and Mr. Copeland’s health issues. “We have a good ending for the news and no harm came to Billie. A wonderful end for your first case, Agent Prentiss.”

“Here, here!” Morgan called out. Aaron moved closer to them. A case well done was a case well done.

“When we get home, first round is on me,” Aaron said. The team turned to him. 

“What about Haley and Jack?”

“I’ll see them after. I’m not going to stay as long as all of you but a good team outing is something that we need.” Aaron pulled out his phone and texted Haley. Telling her that the case was wrapped up but when the team got home they were going to go out. At the last second he put in that it was a way to get to know Prentiss better. 

When Aaron stumbled into the house more from fatigue than the single beer that he had, he’s not shocked to find the house already shut down for the night. His go bag was full of dirty clothes so he set it just inside the living room so that he could do up the clothes inside in the morning. Strauss had given them the morning off and the whole team had been thankful. He looked up as he turned and saw that the couch was made up for someone to sleep on. 

Frowning, Aaron moved up to the bedroom door and the light of the nightlight in the hall shone on the pile of clothes sitting at the base of the door. He tried the doorknob and found it locked. Sighing, Aaron grabbed the clothes and made his way down the stairs. All the fatigue from the case was gone. He moved to grab his go bag and started sorting it out into the bins in the laundry room. When that was done, he placed the bag on the dryer and then moved back into the living room, only stopping to grab his briefcase before heading up to the guest room. The couch was all well and good for a nap after a round of spontaneous sex but he wasn’t going to sleep on it. The bed was made up like it always was, just in case Jessica wanted to stay the night. Sean never visited so the room was only used by Jessica. 

Once changed and showered, Aaron settled onto the bed to work on some files until the fatigue hit him again. When he’d worked on his fourth file, Aaron decided that maybe he was keeping himself up working on them so he closed them up and tossed them off the side of the bed. 

The alarm on his phone ringing woke Aaron up from a dead sleep. He looked around, unsure of where he was. When he recognized some of the decorations he’d bought for the house, Aaron knew where he was. He stretched in bed before slipping out and making his way to the kitchen. There he found Haley sitting and eating a bowl of cereal. She looked up at him in shock. 

“You stayed?” She eyed the empty couch.

“I slept in the guest room.” Aaron moved to the coffee pot and poured himself a cup. He leaned back onto the counter and stared at his wife. “We got back into town around eight, a quick stop at the office to drop off files and then we were out to the bar. I stayed for one beer and a round of watching Prentiss shocked at how many ladies Morgan ended up getting to dance with him and then I was on my way home. I walked in the door at ten oh two.”

“You should have come home!” Haley demanded. 

“I have a duty to my team as well as you. Prentiss is new and I wanted to make sure that she felt a part of the team. I am not Gideon, I won’t leave them questioning their place on the team. The quicker that we can get over any lingering insecurities of having a new member, the better we function and the quicker we can save people.”

“At the expense of your family?” Haley demanded.

“No. Strauss knew our plans and we don’t have to be in until after noon today. I was going to take you and Jack out for a nice brunch at the place you like so much but instead, I think that maybe it’s a father/son outing day. Jack will be up within the hour yes?”

“Yes,” Haley said bitterly.

“Good. I’ll pack up a diaper bag and we shall see what we can get into today.” Aaron drained off his coffee and set the cup in the sink. He righted up the guest room before placing his briefcase outside the door for him to pack into the car. He changed into a pair of slacks and a polo, grabbing a fleece pullover to wear as his jacket for the day. He had his things ready, including his newly packed go bag. Before Jack woke Aaron made sure that he had the diaper bag packed and ready to go. When he had all their things ready, he carried them to the car, Haley watching him from the dining room. 

Jack was just waking up when Aaron came back into the house so he set about changing him and giving him a bottle. He knew that there wasn’t a single thing for him to do that was on the age level with Jack as he was only four months old but he wanted the time with him, no matter what they were doing. So he loaded his son into a car seat after kissing Haley goodbye on the cheek. He just started to drive.

Aaron was shocked when he found himself in front of the Smithsonian. He grabbed the diaper bag and then carefully extracted Jack from his car seat. If he got tired of holding him, Aaron would come back for the stroller that was in the trunk. He was ready for a morning with his son.


	34. Fall 2006

Aaron was sitting in the car down the block from the house being used to send Prentiss in undercover. Greenaway had been upset that she hadn’t been chosen as she’d been on the team longer but Aaron thought that she had the better mindset, especially if William Lee actually made it into the house. There was something about Prentiss that told Aaron that she was good at undercover. There were parts of her file that spoke of hidden things. He didn’t dive too deep in. He just hoped that if and when the time came, she’d tell at least him if not the whole team.

“We have movement,” Morgan said.

Aaron watched as Lee got out of his car and made his way towards the house. Hand on the steering wheel, foot ready to switch from brake to gas, Aaron waited. The mics in the house picked up little. 

Now it was a waiting game, waiting for Prentiss to come back. JJ had sent the signal that it was time when Lee entered the house. It was all planned and it was all going to plan. All they needed was time. 

Watching Prentiss enter the house knowing that Lee was waiting on her was torture. It was pure torture. He hated to think that the man might get the upper hand, that she’d be hurt. He thought the same thing every single time that Morgan was sent in for things as well. It wasn’t because she was a she. It was that she was his responsibility. It was his job to make sure she came out fine. 

The first scream sounded so real that Aaron was afraid. His foot lifted off the brake ever so slightly. He waited. Listening to the words that Lee was spouting. His talk of giving her what she wanted. And waited. He could hear the crash but she hadn’t said the code word that she needed help or that she had him under control. He looked at his watch. It hadn’t even been a minute since the first scream. He’d detailed entry at the five minute mark after she came into the home no matter what happened.

“Clear,” Prentiss said over the comms. “Lee is in custody.” 

Aaron lifted his foot up from the brake and pressed on the gas. Everyone was moving. Morgan was the first out of the SUV, barely giving Aaron time to stop before he was launching himself out. When Aaron followed after, his gun drawn, he found Prentiss standing above Lee. Him on his stomach with his hands cuffed behind his back. He only let himself settle when he saw that Prentiss had no more wounds than a scratch at her face and a slightly twisted elbow from trying to subdue him. 

When he got home that night, Aaron found Haley asleep in bed, he changed into his sleep pants and laid down in bed with her. He pulled her close and let the soft scent of her shampoo pull him into sleep. It was hard not to see Jack’s face in cases that dealt with kids but he’d thought that he’d been able to stop comparing all female victims to Haley. 

“I love you,” Aaron whispered to her as he fell asleep.


	35. February 2007

Aaron was sitting outside the briefing room. He had no clue who was inside. He had a stack of files in his hand, prepared by JJ. This meeting that was planned was twofold. One, it was to go over exactly what had happened on the last case and for Aaron it was a plea for more funding. They had been willing before to add the genius for Gideon, Aaron needed someone else on the team, especially with Greenaway going to be gone for an undetermined amount of time. 

“Agent Hotchner,” Strauss said as she opened the doors. “We are ready for you.”

“Thank you, Ma’am.” Aaron stood up, keeping the files in his hands from falling over. He took the seat that was open at the side of the table, only after he set his files down and had them in order did he finally look at who was there. He was shocked. It was only Strauss, the ADD and the Assistant Director. “Thank you all for meeting with me on such short notice.”

“We know that this last case was a mess up from the word go but it wasn’t anything that you could have stopped, Agent Hotchner,” the ADD said. He opened a file in front of him. “Agents Greenaway and Jareau went to a house thinking they were going to talk to a witness not a suspect. We’ve read the files from both agents. The two ladies stayed together until they were separated at the cornfield. It was then that Agent Greenaway was knocked out and taken captive. Your Deputy Assistant Director has pushed away your request for a year now to add a new member to the team. When we reformed the BSU into the BAU, the main team was going to be made up of six members plus your analyst. It was going to be a slow build but when that genius that Gideon was chasing turned down the BAU, the DAD stopped trying to fill that spot. Greenaway was added as allotted and Prentiss replaced Agent Gideon. It was never meant to be like this. We’ve reviewed all of your cases since you took on the job of lead profiler and have given a hard look at the cases since you took over as the then temporary unit chief.” The ADD looked at the AD who cleared his throat.

“We’ve approved a sixth agent to be added to the team. You can start interviews as soon as you would like. We would prefer a senior agent is added but if you can convince us that a newer agent is a good fit, we will allow it. You and agent Morgan had the seniority on the team. I know that you have been operating as lead profiler still, once the new agent is found and added, we would like that passed onto someone else.”

Aaron looked at the three people in front of him in near shock. He didn’t allow anything to show on his face but he was truly shocked. He looked at Strauss and saw that she wasn’t happy. Had she not known what was coming?

“There is only one thing about the case we would like to discuss. Agent Greenaway, do you think that she can come back from this and do you think that the team can accept her back?” The ADD asked. 

“Agent Greenaway is strong and I think that with the right help, mentally, she can come back from what she suffered at the hands of the father personality of Tobias Hankel.”

“Agent Greenaway documented that he raped her seven times yet you and the team only documented four.”

“Four was all that we saw and after a review of the evidence that’s all we can confirm. I am sure that Agent Greenaway is not lying. There were vast periods of time where the cameras were off and not recording.”

“She only refers to him as Tobias in her report. The rest of the team differentiates between Tobias, Charles, and…” The AD looked at a sheet of paper in front of him. “Raphael.”

“The state of the house profiled like that of a person with DID. It’s our first case of true confirmed DID in the case of a serial killer. Agent Greenaway’s naming her captor just as Tobias is not out of place. She suffered horribly at his hands. She did all she could to get out. She shot and killed her captor and then walked ten miles to find a place to phone us and tell us where she was. I find no fault in what she did and what she survived. I am sure that for the first case or two after Greenaway is returned to the team that things will be tense. We have to find footing again. There will always be issues. Every single member of this team has a certain set of cases that make us hyper aware. After the birth of my son, cases with kids had me hyper focused. We’ve all learned to compensate.”

“So you recommend Agent Greenaway to return to the team when her mandatory health leave is over?” The ADD asked.

“No. That is not up to me. That is up to whoever she sees as her psychologist. If they deem that she is okay to return, I will gladly welcome her back.” Aaron was being truthful. He wanted her back on the team.

“I know that you have been putting in a great deal of time here at the office since the case was closed three days ago,” Strauss started. Aaron turned to look at her. “We are putting your team on mandatory, paid leave for the next week and a half. Come back on the Monday, fresh and ready to work. I’ll put out the word that the team is looking for a new member and we shall see what trickles in.”

“Thank you, Ma’am.”

“Go and tell your team to stand down. I know that Analyst Garcia has been meaning to do a shutdown back up of her system, you can tell her that once she’s done with that, she can take the same leave.” Strauss stood up as did the AD and the ADD. Aaron leaned over and shook their hands as he stood up as well. That meeting had gone a lot better than he thought it was going to. 

The team was ecstatic about the leave, needing time to unwind and decompress after the hell that Georgia had been. Morgan planned to go home to Chicago, Prentiss talked about just spending the time in DC getting to know everything again, JJ was also going home. Garcia spoke of gaming nearly the entire time after the computer upgrades and backups were done. Aaron was looking forward to spending time with Jack. 

Jack was walking and babbling and Aaron was having the time of his life playing with him. His love of Jack only showed him that it had never been his fault that his parents hadn’t loved him. He spent every second that he could with Jack and unfortunately Haley was taking it as a slight. He never knew what her reaction was going to be when he spent as much time with Jack as he could right up until either he or Jack went to bed. 

The lights in the house were all off when he pulled up. After getting paperwork that had to be done before a near week and a half off, it was after seven so the dark house was a little bit of a shock. He grabbed his briefcase and walked up to the door. When he slid the key in the lock, he felt something off. It wasn’t an off feeling he got when someone was watching him or he knew something dangerous was about to happen. It felt off like when he’d gone to the hideaway that first time after his father had died and found no evidence of Tristan. Pushing the door open, Aaron took in the lack of Haley. She wasn’t watching TV and the kitchen light was off as well. Setting his things down, Aaron moved up to the second floor. 

What he found in Jack’s room upset him. Jack’s things were gone. The crib was there and the rest of the furniture but clothes, diapers, all the things needed to take care of him were gone. He moved to their bedroom next. 

Haley’s stance was clear. She wanted out.

Aaron spent the next two hours packing up everything he needed out of his office and the bedroom. No matter what was happening between him and Haley, Jack deserved to live in his house. He was fairly certain that she had gone to Jessica’s, but she only had a one bedroom apartment that was small, the hospitality of being in that cramped place with another adult and a toddler was going to run out. He’d set aside one single thing for him to look at later.

By the time that he was done it was too late to drive to the house and crash with Tom, so Aaron laid down on the couch in his office. He’d bought it with sleeping on it in mind. Haley was more pissed at him for sleeping in the guest room than whatever fights happened that caused her to kick him out of their bed. So he’d found a nice comfortable couch that he would be comfortable sleeping on. She’d been upset with him for that but he didn’t care. 

The feeling of anger at Haley was there but it wasn’t because she left without a word. It wasn’t from the passive aggressive way she was telling him that they were over. It was that she’d taken Jack away from him while he was home to see him. He’d fix that the next morning. He’d go to the house and get his things set up and possibly even go out and get a nice bedroom set for Jack that he could transfer to whatever apartment he bought to live in. If she fought him on seeing his son, he’d file a quick action to get visiting rights set down while he and Haley were working through the divorce that he was sure she wanted. If she wanted out, he wasn’t going to fight her. He wasn’t going to beg, and he wasn’t going to plead. She’d go her way and he’d go his, if for no other reason than trying to keep a relationship between them that wouldn’t have Jack stuck in the middle. 

Settling onto the couch and throwing the soft blanket over him after he’d changed into a pair of sleep pants, Aaron picked up the book he’d set aside. After a horrible case two years before he’d pulled the book from his office and brought it home. _Empty Planet_ ’s cover stared back at him and Aaron cracked the spine so that he could read it. He pushed all thoughts of his job out of his mind and only allowed Tristan in as he read through page after page. By the twentieth page, Aaron only heard Tristan’s voice in his head. When he got too tired to continue to read, he fell asleep with the book on his chest and his head on the pillow. He swore though that Tristan kept reading to him.


	36. Spring 2007

Aaron had felt Dave’s eyes on him the entirety of the case. He didn’t have the time to worry about the senior profiler. Of all the cases to be Greenaway’s first case back after Georgia, this one had to be it. Morgan was escorting the UnSub out of the hotel room while Aaron was working on untying the victim from the bed. Thankfully a burst of brilliance on the part of Rossi and Morgan had them finding the UnSub before she could kill her latest. LaMontagne was waiting there for Morgan at the door and the detective helped Morgan escort her out the door. The detective and his connection to his father had been what had saved the last victim. Aaron wanted to make sure that the local PD knew what a good cop they had on their hands there. 

The attraction between JJ and LaMontagne was a shock but as he watched the man, Aaron could see what JJ liked in him. He was a very kind and sweet man. Aaron’s own failing marriage hadn’t jaded him. He’d been jaded since the age of two but he was happy for her, especially if it worked out for them. This job robbed families of their happiness but some could make it. Other teams showed that. It was all a matter of finding the right partner. 

Once the UnSub was booked it wasn’t long before the team was ready to head out. Aaron looked at the team. Run ragged from a hard case and a new member. 

“Dave, why don’t you and JJ find us a nice bar. I’ll call the pilot and have him schedule a nice morning flight time out. Morgan, I need to talk to you but Prentiss, Greenaway, go ahead and go with Dave and JJ.”

The team members that were released scattered while Morgan seemed apprehensive about what Aaron wanted to talk to him about. Aaron waved him into the room they’d just cleaned of all their things. 

“The higher ups want me to give up the title of lead profiler.”

“And you are worried that I’ll be upset if you give it to Rossi. No. I know that technically he should be unit chief except for I don’t think he wants that and neither do the brass. If it was anyone else, I’d be upset but he is one of the originals, Hotch. Make the brass happy, give up Rossi for slaughter.”

Aaron laughed and Morgan looked a little shocked at it. He’d been thinking the exact same thing. Dave would hate it but he’d do it. “Let’s go see if we can figure out exactly where the rest of our team has decided to tuck themselves away in New Orleans.”

Finding them wasn’t hard and Aaron sighed as he slipped into the booth with Dave. It was some kind of jazz bar that had a man playing at the piano. Morgan, Prentiss, and Greenaway were on the dance floor while JJ was at the bar, her eyes glued to the door. Everyone on the team knew who she was waiting for. 

“So, I remember when I left the unit, you used to text Haley several times a day and you always called her when she woke up in the mornings.”

“I’ve moved into an apartment. I am fairly certain that Haley is gearing up to serve me with divorce papers.”

“What happened?”

“She didn’t like that I took the position as unit chief when Gideon pulled a runner after the case in Seattle. She hadn’t liked me being the temporary after Boston.”

“And you won’t leave the unit.”

“No. If I left the unit for her, I’d come to resent her and then we’d end up horrible. I’d rather just cut the ties now for Jack’s sake than to try and draw this out. I came home after the hearing about the Georgia case to find that she’d pulled all of Jack’s things out. It wasn’t just enough for a few days. It was all of his stuff. I ended up having to have visitation rights set down over the forced leave I had after that. She had the judge changed twice because the first two were ones I knew from my short days as a prosecutor.”

“What were you awarded?”

“Until a divorce happens or I move back in when I am in town on a weekend but not more than two weekends in a month, I have him. Also I can take him for up to three hours three nights a week. So far it’s working. It’s only been a few months though.”

“That’s good. You two were so in love. It’s that she quit her job isn’t it? She only has the house and Jack now.”

“I don’t know. She quit on her own. I didn’t ask or tell her to. We have the money; we could have hired a nanny for Jack for the hours where she was working or even day care.”

“She lived through you in college years. I remember reading the statements from some of your professors. I don’t know why she thought that dedication was going to go away.”

Aaron shrugged. The piano player changed out to another man. This man was taller with facial hair and slightly long brown hair. 

“Ethan Marks. From Las Vegas, Nevada,” Dave said as he sipped at his drink. 

“What?”

“That’s who that is. He came into the academy with another friend, some genius that I can’t remember the name of. John Michaels asked me to see if I could find him while I was down here for the case. Last anyone knew he was playing piano in bars down here. Anyway, he up and quit and never gave a reason. His genius friend, he at least lasted though graduation before quitting. Michaels said he was tapped for the BAU. Straight from academy to your team.”

“Gideon’s genius. You know, as much as Gideon wanted him on the team, he could never remember his name. Just kept calling him that doctor cadet. Have you asked Marks why he quit?”

“No. It’s part of why I picked this place. I had Garcia trace him. As to the genius, Michaels was tight lipped about him. I asked if the FBI had kept track of him and ever tried to recruit him back but I was just blown off." Aaron watched as a little boy with hair to his shoulders stepped up to the piano beside Marks and sat down to start playing. It was just dark enough that Aaron couldn’t make out the boy’s face but given the smile on Marks’ face, he was happy to see the boy. 

Aaron closed his eyes and let himself drift as he listened to Marks and the boy play.


	37. Fall 2007

Every single member of the BAU at one time or another had been called upon to testify in a court case. Even JJ who was just the communications liaison had been there at certain points in a case that made her eyewitness testimony valuable to the prosecutors. It wasn’t hard to recognize the interior of court rooms. The only difference with this case was that they weren’t being called on for what they had seen at the scene of the crime or what the UnSub had done. 

No, this time the BAU was being called up to testify in front of the court on what had led up to that. From that day in Georgia where Greenaway had been taken by Hankel up to the day that she shot and killed Joe Smith while he was in handcuffs in his basement of his Milwaukee home. With his son present. 

Everyone on the team knew that Greenaway was having problems, but no one had expected this. She hadn’t done a single thing that told the team she would ever go off on an UnSub like that. No one had seen her draw her gun and it wasn’t until Smith had said the word ‘no’ that anyone had even paid attention to what was going on around them. The sound of the shot had rung through the basement and even nearly a month later, Aaron couldn’t get the sound out of his head when he slept. 

Every night that first week he’d woken up drenched in sweat, fear gripping his body. Sometimes his mind didn’t stop there. Sometimes she opened fire on the team around her. Sometimes she planted one in Aaron’s head before Morgan was able to return fire and take her down. 

The case was being tried in DC because she was a Federal Agent and had been on a case. Milwaukee gladly handed it over. The jury came back in. Aaron felt like he couldn’t breathe. JJ was tucked into his side and he wrapped his arm around her. Greenaway had been found competent enough to stand trial by three different doctors before her lawyer had finally given up and just tried his hardest to get a reduced sentence. 

Giving the testimony on Greenaway had been hard. Watching the look of betrayal on her face as he described the attitude that she had adopted after coming back from Georgia. Knowing that she blamed him. He and her lawyer had beat that horse dead on that. The only blame that Aaron claimed in her ordeal was sending her out there but that he had to send someone. The whole team backed him up on the fact that it was supposed to be a witness. It wasn’t until after the girls had left that the information had come in that the witness they were going to speak with and the UnSub was the same person. 

“How does the jury find for the count of second degree murder?”

“Guilty.”

There had been no other verdict they could have come back with and Aaron knew it. He knew it wholly and he also knew the sentence that the prosecutor was going to go for. Twenty five years to life. She hadn’t said she was sorry and she hadn’t seen that what she did was wrong. In her eyes, she had gotten a criminal off the streets, no matter that he was already dying and that she had done it in front of his son. Aaron knew why he kept coming back to that. Even though he had hated his father’s guts and had wished him gone all the time, to see someone kill him in front of him would have set Aaron off. 

The judge thanked the jury and Aaron waited for the court room to clear before he even made a move. The team was waiting for him outside the door with another man. The man looked up at him, a look of recognition passed through his eyes before he stepped closer.

“Aaron Hotchner?”

“Yes.”

“Sorry.” The man handed over a packet of papers and Aaron signed the clipboard. He knew what was inside the envelope but what irked him was that Haley knew where he was going to be that day. He would rather have been delivered the papers at the office, the best place would have been home but no. She had to have her lawyer serve them on a day that he was stuck in court all damned day. 

“Hotch?” JJ asked. Garcia at her side. Prentiss was on the other side of Garcia. Morgan and Dave were off to the side. 

“Haley’s filed for divorce.”

“Oh,” Garcia said, and she looked like she wanted to hug him. Aaron softened his face, and she moved forward. He allowed her to tuck her face into his shoulder as he cupped the back of her head. There was movement along the side and years of watching everything had him looking. A man had been staring at them but he was moving away then. Aaron didn’t pay him any mind. The only thing that he remembered was the look of utter desolation on his face. Aaron figured it was someone else who got really bad news at another court case. 

“I’m sorry, Hotch,” Morgan said as he clasped Aaron on the shoulder. Aaron nodded his head in thanks.

When Garcia finally pulled back, Aaron opened up the packet and read it over. It was exactly as set forth in the pre-nup that she had signed with the addition of the arrangement they had agreed upon for Jack. She’d get anything that she needed when it came to Jack. He was going to be her only means of money but it was basically just enough for her to live on. If she wanted anything frilly, she’d have to get a job. He was sure that any of the local libraries would take her back on part time so she had that option. Jessica would probably watch Jack if needed and Aaron would take him anytime that he was in town. He turned to Dave. “Got that pen on you?” 

Dave handed over the pen and when Aaron turned to find a wall to sign the papers on. Morgan turned his back and leaned over. Aaron smiled as he used Morgan’s back as a hard surface. He signed and initialed in every single place that he needed to. The divorce agreement also detailed the custody arrangements. Aaron wanted shared custody. She hadn’t fought him on that, thankfully. The same arrangement as before except for this one had every other holiday and at minimum two weeks of visits in the summer. He could live with that because he’d make sure that Jack understood that he was not going to leave him. That he loved him more than anything else in the world.


	38. January 2008

Aaron slipped into the classroom at Georgetown and sat in one of the back seats. Thankfully the woman, Alex Blake, he was coming to visit hadn’t seen him enter but the man who was sitting at the side of the room had. Aaron listened with one ear but he watched the young man who he assumed was Blake’s TA. The man watched him just as much and wasn’t shy about it. He looked like he wanted to throw him out of the class but for some reason wasn’t. 

The team needed someone, and he hoped that someone was Blake. Since Greenaway had shot Smith, they had been through three new prospective teams members. The first two had only lasted two cases each with the third lasting a whole four cases before calling it quits. When the class was over a few students moved up to talk to Blake and Aaron just waited. The TA’s eyes still hadn’t left him. At that point Aaron realized that he’d seen him somewhere before. The outfit was throwing him. 

The TA was very beautiful, and Aaron could see that he had a sharp mind because he was one of only a few who laughed at a word pun that Blake made. If Aaron wanted to get to know him better, he’d be right up his alley in looks. He wasn’t looking to start anything though. 

“Come on up, Hotch!” Blake called out. 

Aaron was startled. He looked away from the TA to see Blake smiling at him. Aaron smiled back and stood up from his seat and walked down the rows of seats, passing the last few students as he went. 

“Aaron Hotchner, this is my TA Spencer Reid. Spencer this is…”

“Agent Hotchner of the BAU yes. We’ve met before,” Spencer said as he reached out his hand to shake Aaron’s. 

“Have we?” Aaron asked but it was the shake. The same grip and the look in Spencer’s eyes. “The graduate four years ago!”

“Yes.” Spencer smiled at him. 

“You introduced yourself as Trey that day,” Aaron hedged. Trying to get Trey out of Spencer or Reid. 

“It’s a nickname that I got saddled with at the academy for my three PhDs. You startled me and I gave it. I wasn’t feeling well that day.”

“I see. I tried to find you but you slipped out before I could. I wanted to make sure that you were fine.” Aaron only then realized that he still had a hold of Spencer’s hand. He dropped it and looked at Blake who was looking at Spencer’s own hand in shock. “Do you have time for a short talk, Blake?”

“Of course, Hotch. This is actually my last class of the day. Why don’t you walk me out and we can talk. Spencer you better hurry or you’ll miss your last class.”

Aaron watched Spencer look at his watch and sigh as he grabbed a messenger bag from a chair and walked at a brisk pace out of the class. He wanted to ask what Blake was so shocked about with Spencer shaking his hand but he decided not to, so he didn’t draw attention to the fact that he’d held the younger man’s hand for so long. He didn’t even want to think about it either. Three doctorates meant that he was very smart. 

Stopping, Aaron looked at Blake who took a few steps before she realized that he’d stopped. “That’s…is he the genius that Gideon tried to recruit into the BAU?”

“Yes. He quit for health reasons. Something came to his attention the day of graduation. I’ve never pressed him for it. He teaches here at Georgetown and TAs for my classes. I’m sure that you are here to ask me to come back and join the BAU?”

“How did you know?”

“I keep track and I know that the team’s a member short. Given that you are here and didn’t call it doesn’t mean help on a case. You also don’t have that this is a case face. So you are going to ask me to come back.”

“Yes. I am. Dave and I think that you may be a good option. The last three have flaked out. With everything that’s happened we need stability. We need a lot of things and I hope that you are the start of getting those things.”

“I need to find a teacher to cover my classes when we are on cases. I still want to teach as much as I can and we’ll keep going over what I can handle semester by semester. Agreeable?”

“Why does Doctor Reid TA your classes if he teaches here?”

“I’ve never asked him his reasoning past his first answer of he wanted to. Sometimes he can’t do it for all my classes and I get another to do it. The Dean will probably have him cover my classes as he’s most familiar with it all.”

“How is James?” Aaron asked he pushed open the door leading outside. When he was fully outside he inhaled a deep breath, settled for the first time in a while.


	39. Spring 2008

Aaron hung up and looked at Rossi and Morgan. “Blake thinks that he’s going to Jordan and I think she’s right.”

The drive to the police department had Aaron thinking back over what Blake had said about bullies. How her TA had spent his entire pre-college years bullied for his brain and size. How he had been tied to goal post and no one watching had tried to help him. Aaron had never felt the sting of a bully but given how Morgan had reacted he had at least at some point. There really wasn't a line between bullying that bullies did in fun and that bullies did that was harmful, like it was in this case. 

At what point can the school be held responsible for what the blind eyes causes. At what point can parents get in trouble when their children are the reason another child takes a gun to school because it’s the only way to get the abuse to stop. All teenagers profile like psychopaths but why wasn’t more being done to protect children and teenagers. Many schools had a no tolerance policy but nothing was truly done to put that in effect. 

Aaron pulled the SUV to a stop just in time to see Owen Savage taking a step towards Blake. His hands were in a giving up pose but one of the cops took a step forward, raised his gun and before Aaron could even get out of his vehicle, the cop pulled the trigger. The sound was deafening even from the distance they were at. After the first shot, many others went off and Aaron watched as a teenager was gunned down. It brought back Chula Vista to his memory and the ordeal that it had been. 

Blake was fine. Aaron ran up to her and pulled her back. She was still. Just standing there. When he had her pulled back, he got a good look at her face. There was blood all over it. Spray from where Savage had been shot. 

“I told them not to fire. Hotch, he was surrendering. He was laying down his gun,” Blake uttered. 

Aaron pulled out a napkin from his pocket and wiped at her face before the blood dried more. When he was done, Morgan handed him another one, this one had been wet down with water from the bottle in the SUV. Dave, JJ, and Prentiss had the locals in hand and were making sure that Blake couldn’t see the dead body. 

There couldn’t have been a worst case for Blake’s first one on the team, Aaron thought as they disembarked from the plane hours later. He didn’t want Blake to go home to an empty house but he knew that James was overseas somewhere. When he looked up he saw Blake’s car there along with a man sitting on the trunk of the car with a book on his lap. Aaron watched him as they moved closer to the car. He looked up, a pair of thick rimmed glasses on his face and a large smile.

“Alex.” Spencer Reid jumped off the trunk of the car and tossed his book down onto the messenger bag that had been hidden by him. Before Aaron could say anything, Spencer had Blake into the passenger side of the car and off they were. Aaron could only watch as they drove away. He couldn’t remember seeing Blake move on the flight back much less call or text anyone. She must have done it though because how else would her former TA know to come and pick her up? 

Going to their own vehicles, the rest of the team scattered to the wind. They’d all finished off their files on the jet so that they could have what remained of the evening for themselves. Aaron got into his own car and started to drive away. He wasn’t paying attention and truly thought he was on his way home when he found he’d turned off to head to what had been his parent’s house. He kept going though instead of turning back. 

Tom was outside on the front porch smoking when he pulled in. The man smiled at him and stood up to greet him. “Aaron.”

“Tom. All quiet?”

“As a church. Going to go into the back?”

“Yeah.” Aaron went back that way, not even getting close enough to the other man to shake his hand. He’d promised that he’d leave the hideaway for Tristan but he couldn’t. He needed a piece of that back right then. He didn’t stop to even think that Tristan could be there until he heard running footsteps as he stepped into the small clearing in front of the hideaway. The steps didn’t go far. Aaron ducked into the hideaway and settled onto the floor. It was springtime and he wouldn’t freeze if he fell asleep but still he pulled a blanket out of the box, it was a thin one and he draped it over himself. He knew that the cold he was feeling was from emotions. The person outside moved around to the back of the hideaway.

“Hello, Tristan.”

A poke at his shoulder through the tarp was his only answer. Aaron laughed. He shifted around to where he was leaning against the box. He heard Tristan move and then felt the box shift as Tristan leaned against the end that was up against the tarp. There were only inches between them but it felt like so much more. A book slid under the tarp. Aaron wasn’t shocked at what it was. _The Secret Garden_ was one of the few children’s books that Tristan had loved to read. He’d read it when he wasn’t feeling well. When he really wasn’t feeling well, Aaron would read it to him. 

Opening the book, Aaron started to read. He read and read until he fell asleep. 

When he woke the next morning he was on his side with a pillow under his head and he had the distinct impression that someone had covered him up and kissed his forehead telling him that they loved him but he couldn’t remember the voice. Had that just been a dream from being alone without Haley or had it been Tristan? It hadn’t sounded like the way that he told Jack he loved him with parental love. It had sounded like an ache. Like a love that wasn’t there yet but almost. A one sided love that was lost to time.


	40. Summer 2008

Aaron was walking towards the SUV when it happened. A little boy was running through the street and bumped into him. It was New York and too late at night for the kid to be out alone so Aaron turned to call out to him when he felt something weird. The kid was five feet away when he checked his pocket that he carried his wallet in, it was gone. He looked up at the kid who was now at least ten feet away.

“HEY!” Aaron yelled out. He looked at Kate before turning back to the boy and taking off running. The kid was fast but Aaron was slowly catching up to him. The kid was wearing a hood and when Aaron got close enough, he grabbed it. The second his hand closed around it, Aaron’s whole world shook. He felt the blast of air and heat and the pressure in his ears. He turned, hand still on the hood and saw the devastation. He turned back to the kid, to make sure that he was fine but the kid was gone. His hood still in Aaron’s hands and down on the ground was Aaron’s wallet. He looked and saw the kid round a corner and then was gone.

Kate.

Aaron dropped the hood and only picked up his wallet for his ID and then took off towards the SUV, which was now a burning hunk. He looked inside trying to find Kate but it didn’t look like she was inside. He started to look in the surrounding area. He found her twenty feet away. She was burned badly and Aaron was afraid to touch her. He couldn’t even tell if she was breathing. 

“Kate?” Aaron ran his hand down her arm to her wrist, barely touching until he found skin. He pressed there and there was no pulse. He lifted his hand next to lay it under her nose. There was no breath. She was dead. Aaron gulped in air to stop the tears that were threatening. His ears were ringing but he pulled his phone out and called the field office. He reported his status as alive and seemingly uninjured and Kate as dead before the cell network crashed. He just hoped that the rest of the team was made aware. He slipped his jacket off and laid it over Kate’s head, covering her face. He looked around then. His eye looking for the secondary set that would be coming. This bomb had been in or under the SUV. Where was the other set up?

The blockade was set up and when the coroner van got to the edge of it, Aaron picked up Kate and carried her to the van. Bomb squad was on their way and would clear the area. When Aaron had laid her down in the black bag, he turned to Morgan. 

“What happened, Hotch?”

“We were on our way to the SUV when this kid pickpocketed me. I chased after him. Just as I grabbed his hood the bomb went off. When I turned to check to make sure the kid was fine, he was gone and his hood was still in my hand. He’d dropped my wallet probably in the explosion. When I got to Kate she was already dead.”

“You would have been right there with Kate when the bomb went off. The kid saved your life. Have you checked your wallet to make sure he didn’t take money or anything?”

“No.” Aaron dug out his wallet and opened it up. All of his cards and things were there so he moved on to check the paper money. There tucked in the middle of the two twenties was a slip of paper. He looked down at it and knew the writing. He knew the writing before he even registered the words.

_I’m sorry for Kate but I’ll always choose you._

It had been Tristan. Aaron looked around to see if he could see the kid. While he scanned the crowd, he thought about what that meant. Had he been the one to die if Tristan hadn’t pulled him away from the SUV.

“Hotch?” Morgan asked.

“Nothing’s taken. I don’t think that he had time.” Aaron closed his wallet, leaving the note where it was. He’d deal with the thoughts on it later. Right now he had terrorists to worry about and not a child who had saved his life.

When the second bomb went off, they were ready. It was seven blocks over. Two teenagers were injured in the blast. A third wasn’t nearly as injured. Aaron wondered exactly why the bombers were leaving them alive. Footage of their bomb had been combed by Garcia and the trigger puller had eyes. He hadn’t see Aaron take off though and had set off the bomb. 

“What’s in the shared radius of the two sites?” Aaron asked, looking at Dave and Prentiss who had a local map stretched out on the hood of the SUV they used to get to the new blast site. JJ was safely in the field office. Blake was with her as well, in place to handle any calls that would come through, even though Aaron was near one hundred percent sure none would. 

“We have various businesses and a hospital.”

“Hospital?”

“That hospital is on bypass. It’s shut down, not accepting anyone,” one of the agents said. 

Aaron looked at Morgan and Dave. A plan started forming in his head. 

With three guns trained on one of the terrorists, Aaron watched as the bomb squad worked at the bomb. Garcia’s protection was going to fail soon but hopefully by then, the bomb would be disabled. A shout of triumph echoed to their right and Aaron smiled. The terrorist lunged at them and Aaron took aim, shooting out his knee. 

Aaron sighed in relief. Their part was done. The rest was up to the locals to get what they needed out of this guy. The entire area was a rush of activity. 

“Agent Hotchner?” someone said. Aaron turned to see a local standing there with a hand on the shoulder of a kid. The kid was standing there with his hands crossed on his chest and a frown on his face. “I saw the face of the kid in the footage that your Miss Garcia had up and when I saw him I knew. Did you want to press charges?”

“I don’t know. I want to talk to him first.” Aaron looked at the kid and it was when the kid looked up at him that Aaron knew it was Tristan and knew that he was who had picked his pocket. The cop shoved the kid towards him and Aaron pointed at the SUV so that Morgan and Dave would know where he was going. When they got close, Aaron opened the door. Thankfully no one would be able to see inside so he wasn’t shocked that when he sat down that Tristan crawled into his lap. Aaron cupped the back of his head and he felt the hot tears on his skin. “It’s okay. I’m okay.”

Aaron fumbled Tristan’s hand from where it was curled in his shirt and pressed it to his throat. Right where he could feel the beat of Aaron’s heart. He could hear the boy saying something. Over and over, just under his breath. He tipped his head down to where he could hear him.

“Don’t hate me. Don’t hate me,” Tristan uttered over and over again. Pressing a kiss into Tristan’s forehead, Aaron pulled him in tighter. Tristan shuddered but didn’t try and get away. He clung close, his hands slipped to wrap around Aaron’s neck. He sighed and pressed in a second kiss.

“I’m not mad and I don’t hate you. How long have you been here?” 

Tristan shook his head in a no. His breathing hitched again. 

“Okay. Don’t…please don’t. Look, I’m going to be here for a while but you…I’ll get you in a cab and send you off to my hotel. I’ll give you my keycard. Slip in through the back or something. Do you think you can do that?” 

“Yes,” Tristan said, his voice strong despite the shudder from tears in it. Aaron pulled the keycard from his pocket and handed it over. Tristan’s hand wrapped around it. He grabbed his wallet next and pulled out money. He handed Tristan a twenty and palmed a fifty before closing it and putting it back. He sat there with Tristan in his lap until the boy was breathing normally and his crying was almost stopped. “Time to go?”

“Yes.” 

Tristan climbed off his lap and sat in the seat beside him while he opened the door and got out of the SUV first. He stood there while Tristan climbed out next. He kept his head down like he was properly chastised, a hand snuck up and wiped at his face. He let out a sniffle.

“Thank you, officer but I think in this case he won’t be doing it again. The bomb kind of scared him straight.”

“If you are sure.”

“Yes. I’m going to go hail a cab at the end of the blockade and send him home.”

Aaron kept a hand on Tristan’s shoulder more to keep a feel for him. He knew the signs meaning that Tristan was going to travel. He just didn’t want him disappearing in the middle of a group of cops. He found a cab easily as many were on hand to take people who couldn’t access their cars due to the blockade home . Aaron gave the driver the address. He turned to Tristan. “There is a little twenty four hour shop about a half a block down. Go get yourself some food before going back to the room, okay son?”

Tristan looked at him in shock for the word son but he nodded and slipped into the backseat. The driver didn’t even blink an eye just took off. Aaron had given Tristan both bills. He could pay the driver and if there was no money left after he fed himself, it wasn’t a big deal. Getting a good look at him in the streetlights, Aaron could tell from the bags under his eyes that he’d been here at least a few days. If sleeping in the hotel had him feeling better, that was all Aaron wanted. 

It was two hours before Aaron could get back to the hotel. He’s lied to the desk and said that his room key had been lost in the explosion. Given that the hotel knew they were FBI, it hadn’t been a stretch to believe it. The clerk handed him a new key with no issue. When he let himself into the room he didn’t know what to expect. Would Tristan already be gone, leaving nothing but a pile of clothes on the floor? 

That the TV was on was the first that thing he noticed. The second was the smell of his own body wash and shampoo. Tristan was sitting up on the bed with one of Aaron’s sleeping shirts on. His knees were tucked up to his chest and under the shirt. Aaron smiled at the sight. Slipping the Do Not Disturb sign out, Aaron shut the door. The team would honor it unless it was an emergency. 

Tristan’s hair was still wet from the shower so he hadn’t taken it too long before then. Eyes just watched him from the fringe of the long brown hair. Aaron pointed at the bathroom, he grabbed clothes. He wanted to be clean of the smell of smoke and free from grime. Tristan didn’t nod but he didn’t move at all. 

Aaron took the shortest shower of his life but made sure that he was clean before he stepped out into the main room. Tristan was still in the same place but he had to have moved because there was a sandwich, a bag of chips, and a bottle of water on the foot of the bed. He sat down on the edge of the bed and cracked open the water to take a drink. 

“Do you have anything that needs medical attention?”

Eyes still just watched him which Aaron took as Tristan didn’t want to lie but he also didn’t want to tell the truth. He wasn’t used to him being so silent; his memories told him that Tristan liked to talk. He’d always filled up Aaron’s silences. 

“Tristan.” Aaron glared at him. Tristan glared right back.

“The Hotchner glare won’t work on me. It never has. Just cause you are bigger doesn’t mean you are any more scary.” 

“Let me take care of whatever is wrong.”

Tristan sighed and nodded. He scooted down the bed and settled on his stomach after he pulled off the shirt. Aaron gasped as the mass of bruises and cuts his back was revealed. “Happened at home. Bully at school dragged me by my feet across hot concrete. It shredded my shirt.”

“How long have you been in New York?” Aaron moved to his go bag. He didn’t have a lot of things in there but antiseptic and antibacterial cream he did. It was then that he noticed that Tristan was wearing boxers. Kid boxers. He was happy that he had given him more money than he needed then. 

“Two weeks tomorrow morning.”

“How did you know that I was going to be there?”

“Older me was there. I saw him. He looked anxious. I asked him. He told me.”

Aaron wondered how he’d missed it. He got up to grab what he needed from the bathroom, towels, water. The initial damage was done two weeks ago but he’d been hurt since then because the bruises were fresh and some of the older wounds looked like they’d been reopened. Two weeks of being alone. Two weeks of fighting for food.

“Did he tell you how long you are going to be staying?”

“He said I’d go back tomorrow night.”

“I’ll have your clothes washed tonight. I don’t have the hoodie. It kind of got lost in the shuffle. But you shouldn’t need it. The nights are warm.”

“I only had it so that you wouldn’t recognize me.” Tristan hissed as Aaron cleaned the reopened wounds. He was as careful as he could be but his back was a horrible mess. “I didn’t expect the cop to grab me.”

“They are hyper aware with the threat.”

“The BAU wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t bad. I’ve been kind of following you around since you got here. I hang around the FBI building a lot when I can. Less people are going to bother you.”

Aaron laughed. He had gauze and tape and it would work to cover the wounds at least for the night. It wasn’t long before he had Tristan back into his t-shirt. The boy sat up on the bed and smiled, pushing the food closer. Aaron opened the sandwich wrapper and found it was turkey and swiss. He took a bite and Tristan opened the bag of chips.

“What did you eat?”

“Same thing and a fruit cup. They only had boxers in my size. No shirts. You don’t mind me…” Tristan picked at his shirt.

“Never. Where did you put your clothes?”

“In the corner in the bathroom behind the door. That way if anyone on the team comes looking they won’t see them, I hope.”

“Good thinking.” Aaron finished off his sandwich quickly not realizing how hungry he was until he started to eat. When he was done with that he grabbed up Tristan’s things and easily threw them in the bag from the store the boy had stopped at. He went down to the desk to have the clothes cleaned, throwing in a few of his own things. If anyone asked, he’d say it was his son’s clothes and he hadn’t realized they were in his bag. 

When he got back to the room, Tristan was stretched out on top of the covers and was mostly asleep. Aaron turned off the TV and the lights and lifted up the boy so he could lay him down under the covers. Tristan nuzzled his face into the pillow and curled onto his side. Aaron slipped into the bed from the other side and made sure to keep space between them. Sleeping in the same bed as kids had been rare. He could count the times on one hand. 

“Aaron?” Tristan asked.

“Yes?”

“I’m glad you aren’t mad.” Tristan sounded tired. More tired than just no sleep. Reaching over, Aaron pulled on his arm until he was lying against him. Tristan settled his head on Aaron’s trapped arm and sighed, closing his eyes. There was just enough light from the bright moon that Aaron could just barely see his face. 

“Sleep, Tristan. Just sleep. I’m here and I’ll protect you.”

“Always.” It wasn’t a question. It was a statement but still Aaron couldn’t not answer.

“Always.”


	41. Winter 2008

“That was quick thinking on your part, Blake,” Dave said as he shook her hand as the team came back. Aaron was happy to see him and didn’t begrudge him the hug he wanted. The rest of the team submitted to the hug from him as well. The case had been a near miss. The quick thinking of Dave and Blake had saved the team. As did Blake knowing about the symbol that Grace had on his neck meant. Quick texts back and forth between her and Spencer, her TA, had the location of the children and babysitter narrowed down in short order. 

The man’s obsession with the golden ratio hadn’t been hard to profile and once they applied it to his life and the profile, they knew that only one set of people were going to be killed. Since he’d already killed two of the hostages, there was no way he would kill the team going after them unless the hostages weren’t dead. It was easy to find the gas and disable it and save themselves and the hostages. 

“Drinks on me,” Dave said loud enough for the entire team to hear and then looked at Blake. “Bring that TA of yours. If he hadn’t known what the symbol was we would have been way behind.”

“Spencer’s a little awkward but I’ll see what I can do. Though this meeting might just be what brings him in.”

“Oh?” Dave looked a little shocked. Everyone on the team knew that her TA taught some math and sciences and covered her classes at Georgetown. 

“Spencer is Gideon’s genius,” Aaron said. 

“What THE genius. The one that quit the FBI the day after graduation? That’s your TA?”

“Yes. Spencer was in the FBI but some health issues popped up and he had to quit the FBI.”

“Then you need to bring him in. I heard Gideon bitching to me enough about him that I feel that I know him already.”

“Just don’t…”

“Bring up the FBI and him leaving. Yes. Yes. I’m an ass but I’m not insensitive.”

Aaron wasn’t so sure that he would have held Dave to that but two hours later when the whole team was seated about a large circular booth table. Blake had said that she hadn’t heard back from Spencer yet so she didn’t know if he was coming. 

Eyes wandering the bar they were in, Aaron caught sight of a man standing at the bar. His face was turned towards the bartender but his hip was leaning against the bar. He was in a three piece suit with curly near shoulder length hair. He was on the skinny side but Aaron just looked at the way the suit hung on him. It wasn’t until he turned after the bartender handed him his drink that Aaron recognized him. He looked so different than that day in Blake’s class. Spencer Reid. That stopped Aaron cold. He’d been checking out Blake’s TA. And there was only one spot left to sit and that was beside Aaron. 

“Agent Hotchner, Alex, BAU team,” Spencer said as he got close. Aaron stood up so that he could slide into the booth, next to Alex and then sat back down again. Aaron tried to keep to the edge of the seat but that position was lacking in stability so he scooted in a little farther, his side pressed against Spencer’s. The scent of his cologne was familiar but Aaron couldn’t place where he’d smelled it before.

“You can call him Hotch, kid,” Dave said as he leaned forward to look at him. Spencer smiled and ducked his head down a little. Everyone was looking at him. 

“So my knowledge on the golden ratio helped?” Spencer asked, looking at Blake.

“Yes, very much so. My name is Emily Prentiss.” 

“Oh, I know who all of you are. Alex has told me a lot but I’ve been told that knowing people’s names before being introduced to them is kind of creepy. You all work with Alex, she talks about you a lot.” Spencer sipped at his drink and Aaron could tell that it wasn’t what he was trying to pass it off to be. The glass was dressed like a Long Island Iced tea but he was pretty sure it was just iced tea. He watched more than listened to Spencer talk to the rest of the team. He talked with his hands and Aaron found that the sound of his voice was soothing yet exciting at the same time. He switched to water when the next round of drinks was ordered. No one commented on it. He rarely drank too much. A drink or so when out and sometimes two when he was home. Spencer nursed his drink up until Blake went up for the third round. He just shook his glass at her and she nodded. 

“So how long have you known Blake?” Morgan asked.

“Since I started taking classes at Georgetown which was right after I left the FBI.” Spencer tensed like he was waiting to be asked about it but no one did. He started to talk about how much fun he had TAing her classes while teaching his own. When Blake came back with the drinks, Aaron and Spencer stood to allow her back in. When Aaron sat back down, he didn’t realized that he’d pressed as close to Spencer as he had until he turned to look at him and saw that his face was right there. 

Spencer didn’t seem to either notice or care but Aaron did. He freaked out a little and drained his drink. It was time for him to go. It was really time for him to get out of there and go home. He had work the next day and he needed to be sharp because it was a Jack weekend for him. He said his goodbyes and ignored the look on Blake’s face as he left. He didn’t need or want to think on what that look meant.


	42. Spring 2009

There were cases that were considered wins. There were cases that were considered losses. Then there were cases where not a single person wins. Aaron wasn’t sure what to consider the case that he had just got home from. Adam Jackson had been a victim long before he’d become an UnSub. It was another case of it never should have come to that. 

Adam was locked inside the mind of his alter, Amanda. Adam’s father was dead, never to pay for the crimes that he had committed. And Adam’s victim’s families would never see him tried for the crimes he’d committed. 

Aaron didn’t want to go back to his empty apartment. He didn’t want to go to Dave’s. He didn’t know what he wanted. So when he arrived at what had been his home before to see Haley cleaning up Jack from his dinner, he wasn’t all that shocked. Instead of fighting it, Aaron got out of the car and he wasn’t even all the way up the walk when Jack spotted him. Haley had the door open by the time he got there. She took one look at him and smiled.

“Want a few hours?” Haley asked. 

“Please.”

“There is some shopping I can do. Call when you are ready to leave and I’ll come back.”

“Thank you.” Aaron pressed a kissed on her forehead when she passed him on her way out the door. Jack was all for it. Was all for playing with his dad. Just as dusk was settling in, there was a knock on the door. Aaron looked out the peephole to see nothing so he cracked the door open a little. Standing there, in an outfit that Aaron knew, was Tristan. A four year old Tristan. He smiled and waved at Aaron.

“Hi, Aaron.”

“Tristan. How did you know how to find me here?”

“Cause older me was with me when I showed up at the other house. He dropped me off to play.” Tristan wiggled between him and the door and slipped inside the house. Jack was in the middle of the living room with toys all spread out. “Hi! My name’s Tristan. What’s yours?”

“Jack.”

“Hi, Jack.” 

When Aaron was finally unshocked enough to shut the door and step into the living room, he found the two boys playing with the action figures on the carpet. 

“Have you eaten dinner yet, Tristan?” Aaron asked.

“Yes, Sir. I ate on the way over. I had pizza.” 

Aaron tried to figure out exactly how the other Tristan had gotten him there. He ended up just asking him. 

“He drove me. He was waiting for me in his car.”

“Car?”

“Yes.” Tristan looked up at him for the first time since he’d come into the room. “Are you okay, Aaron?”

“Yes. I’m just a little lost.”

“It’s real me. He lives here in DC. I see him sometimes instead of Tom. Last time I came for a visit was a while back. Tom invited me inside for hot chocolate.”

Jack demanded Tristan’s attention after that, and Aaron just sat and watched his childhood best friend play action figures with his son. He wondered how much Tristan was going to be popping in and out of Jack’s life now. The real Tristan lived in the area and was driving. That meant he was at least sixteen. That had Aaron shuddering a little. Seeing child Tristan was always a little weird but as he sat there he thought about how he hadn’t seen a young Tristan. Ten years old was the oldest outside of the seventy year old one that he’d met. What was so bad that Tristan wouldn’t want to see him? 

Unless he had met him in the time but hadn’t known it. If it had been him, he’d have probably hugged the crap out of Tristan the first time seeing him as an adult. He tried to advance the image of Tristan in his mind from New York. Tried to turn the face of a boy into a man but he just couldn’t. He sighed and relaxed back onto the couch to watch the boys. When Jack started to get tired, he climbed up into Aaron’s lap. Tristan just cleaned up all the toys and sat back down on the floor.

“I can share my daddy,” Jack said. Tristan just looked at him, not understanding. “Daddy’s lap is big enough for both of us.”

Aaron felt a tear leaking out of his eye as Tristan smiled and climbed up onto his lap. He ruffled Jack’s hair and kissed his head. He and Haley were doing all right with him. He grabbed the TV remote turning it on and finding a show that he knew Jack liked. Tristan settled down and it wasn’t long before both boys were out for the count. Aaron didn’t want to move though. He was afraid that moving would cause Tristan to go or Jack to wake up. 

Finally, when he couldn’t take his dead arms anymore, Aaron shifted Tristan down on the couch and then carried Jack up the stairs. He settled his son in his bed and kissed his forehead. He wondered not for the first time how parents could ever harm their own children. When he was sure he wasn’t going to wake up, Aaron went back down to find Tristan sitting up on the couch. He was rubbing his eyes and staring at Aaron. 

“I was told to tell you to just take the clothes back home and I’ll find them next time I need them.” Tristan raised his hands like he wanted picked up and so Aaron did. Tristan wrapped his arms around his neck and hugged him tight. “I love you, Aaron. Big or small.”

Aaron kissed his forehead and laughed a little. “I love you too. Big or small.”


	43. Summer 2009

Aaron felt awareness come back to him. He didn’t know where he was and he didn’t know what was going on. There was a light on at the edge of his very blurry vision. He tried to sit up but pain flared in his head and he laid back down with a groan. 

“Skinny little thing.”

“With a big bite.” 

“I’ll take care of you and then deal with him. What would the rest of the team think about the fact that the boss takes it up the ass from something like you? Because there is no other reason to be in a man’s apartment this late.” The words were said from a voice that he knew. What had been happening? Reaper. Aaron tried to sit up again but the sound of gunfire echoed around the room and Aaron felt himself going away again. 

Aaron remembered moving but not how. He remembered the click of something and then the thud of something else. Then there was more movement. 

“Just, don’t move, Aaron. God, don’t move at all. I’m taking you to someplace safe. You’ll be safe, I promise. And if I see Foyet again. I won’t miss his heart again.” The voice was soft and Aaron was thankful as he wasn’t sure if his head could take the pain of a loud voice. His head throbbed and he knew he’d be passing out again soon. 

Then there was nothingness again. 

“There’s a man inside with a massive head wound! I need a gurney, STAT.” Aaron tried to move but a hand on his chest stopped him and when a bright light was shone in his eyes he passed out again. 

The next time that he woke up, Aaron was sound enough to not open his eyes. He tried not to move and he just listened. There was the steady beep of a machine and the sound of someone next to him, breathing. He listened and found that beyond that he heard the noises of other people and then the beep became something he knew. He was in a hospital. The person next to him coughed and that’s when he knew it was Dave. The voice had promised him somewhere safe and it had done what it had said. 

“What happened?” Aaron asked. 

“Aaron?” Dave asked back. 

Aaron blinked his eyes open and regretted it. Pain spiked through his head. He shut his eyes and slowly worked on getting his eyes used to the light. When he could stand to keep his eyes open he looked at Dave. Prentiss was now standing behind him. “What happened?”

“We hoped you could tell us. Someone in your apartment called in three gunshots. You were clocked over the head at least once if not more than once. We were alerted once it popped in the system that you were a federal agent. We’ve been taking shifts waiting for you to wake up.”

“Shifts?”

“A case popped up,” Prentiss said. 

“It’s all handled and the UnSub is dead.” Dave pushed him back on the bed. “Walk us through what you remember. You got in your car and drove home.”

“I opened my door and set my things down. I was so tired from the case but I couldn’t settle so I poured a glass of scotch. I knew something was wrong and turned around.” Aaron tried to remember what happened next. He closed his eyes.

“Aaron?” Dave asked.

“I can’t remember. I just remember the feeling of falling after a gunshot. I remember hearing two men talking. One man said that he was going to deal with the other man and then come after me. Then I passed out again. When I woke up again, I was moving. I don’t know what happened. The man who was talking to me told me that next time he saw…” Aaron shot up in the bed and his heart monitors started to go haywire. His couldn’t talk. His heart was in his throat. It all came back. “It was Foyet. Foyet was in my apartment. He shot at me and when I didn’t flinch he attacked me. We fought. He smashed my head into a table. I started to lose it there. Then someone spoke and Foyet turned to him. I punched him and he hit me on the head with his gun.”

“You were talking about a man telling you something.”

“He said that if he saw Foyet again, he wasn’t going to miss his heart again.”

“That goes with what we found. We found the first hole in the wall from the first shot. Then a second in the wall with blood on it. The third shot was dug out of the wall with all the drywall scraped from around it. We will run the blood on the second slug and compare it to Foyet.”

“You and your car were dropped off in the ambulance bay of the hospital. The driver was seen getting out on camera but the image doesn’t match Foyet. We don’t have a face. He was wearing an FBI hat. We presume he got it from your apartment. The rest of the team is on their way.” Prentiss sat down on the edge of his bed as a nurse came in to check on him. He allowed the poking and the prodding. 

“Haley and Jack?”

“Anderson is sitting with them at their house. Do you think they are in danger?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t know I was in danger.”

A few minutes later, a doctor came into the room and Dave and Prentiss were ushered out. He allowed the poking and the prodding and listened as he was told what happened and what to expect. His skull had been crack with the blow from the gun. He was going to be kept for at least another day and then it was a few weeks light duty. He settled down into the bed and was bored in a few minutes after the team left. 

A volunteer knocked on his door. Aaron looked up at the older woman. “Package for Aaron Hotchner?”

“That’s me.”

The woman smiled and handed over a paperback book. He looked at it and smiled. _Casino Royale._ He opened the cover and found just a single line. 

_I’m sorry I didn’t kill him._ There was no name attached but he knew the writing. That saved him worrying about the second person who had broken into his apartment and who dropped him off like that. He wondered if Tristan showing up like that meant that he was going to meet adult him soon. He’d always said that the places he went were important and that Aaron was important but he’d never shown up at the apartment before that Aaron knew of. 

As he settled back in the bed, he let his thoughts about finding Foyet go to the wayside. The book was Tristan telling him not to obsess and for now he could. He couldn’t do a thing until he got out of the hospital. He needed to relax to have a nice and fresh mind. And a spy novel was perfect for that.


	44. October 2009

“Hotchner,” Aaron said as he picked up his phone. He was reading a report on the newest search for Foyet through his medicine. There was nothing.

“Aaron, one of your friends from Seattle is here.”

“Friends from Seattle?” Aaron looked up from the paper to try to clear his head. He saw Blake at the door and waved her in. “Who?”

“He says his name is Peter Rhea.”

“I don’t know a Peter Rhea.” Aaron wracked his brain trying to figure out if he ever knew a Peter at all, much less from Seattle. The last name of Rhea didn’t ring a bell either. He watched as Blake waved at someone else outside the room and then looked out the window to see the whole team coming up to his office. 

“Well he knows you…” Aaron pushed Haley from his mind as Blake sat down with a piece of paper and wrote out the name. Aaron frowned into his phone as Haley described something from his SWAT days that never happened. The team arrived in his office. Blake was fiddling around with letters of the name. Making words out of them. Aaron had seen her do it before when she was thinking. 

“Haley, that’s great but…” He stopped when Blake’s eyes widened and she turned her pad around. THE REAPER was written in large letters. Aaron jumped to his feet, slamming the phone down and grabbing his cellphone and tearing out of the office. He didn’t take the elevator he just ran down the stairs. He was in his car before he knew it and on the way. He dialed the house phone and waited but no answer. Next he tried Haley’s cell.

“Hello, Aaron,” Foyet said.

“If you’ve touched them…”

“Now, now just calm down.” 

Aaron could hear Jack in the background. It sounded like he had the phone on speaker. 

“Aaron?” Haley sounded scared. He was glad. Her being aware that things were not on the up and up would help to keep her alive. 

“Jack, buddy. Do you think you can help me work the case?” Aaron asked. He hoped that Jack remembered. While Aaron’s office had been emptied of his things, sometimes when Haley wanted to go visit her family he’d stayed with Jack at the house and he’d do work in the office. He hoped Jack remembered what it meant.

“Okay, dad.” The sound of his running feet echoed on the phone and Aaron sighed. Foyet hadn’t stopped him.

“It’s okay, Jack! I’ll come find you soon.”

Aaron clenched the steering wheel tightly. He wanted it to be Foyet’s neck. He wanted to feel the life of the man leave. He was only ten minutes away. He just needed to keep him on the line for ten minutes. Heart in his throat he stepped on the gas. 

“Say goodbye, Haley.”

“Aaron?”

Before Aaron could say a word, the sound of a gunshot happened. Aaron closed his eyes briefly. There was one and then a pause and two back to back. Then silence.  
**The End of Arc 2**


	45. Arc 3-October 2009

Aaron slammed the door shut on his car, his eyes locked on the front door of the house. He moved quickly but silently. When he got to the door he tried the knob and found it unlocked. Silently, he swung the door open making sure that it wouldn’t make a noise. He steeled himself for what he was going to see. Haley dead on the floor, a puddle of blood forming around her body. 

When he stepped into the room with his gun drawn he wasn’t expecting to see three people. Foyet was dead on the ground, his gun kicked away from his body. Haley was on the floor a few feet away, her head in the lap of another man. His hand was on her throat like he was checking her pulse. Aaron kept his gun raised as he took another step closer. The man holding Haley must have heard him because he looked up.

Spencer Reid.

The gun lowered a little as Aaron looked at him, truly looked at him. He scooted back and laid Haley’s head down on the floor carefully and then stood up with his hands raised. He was dressed exactly like he had been the day that he’d met Spencer, five years before. FBI academy graduation outfit with the messenger bag slung over his shoulder. He looked scared to death. He took a step back and Aaron raised the gun again. He wanted to know exactly what the hell he was doing there.

But before he could get the words out of his mouth, Spencer was gone. Faded out exactly like Tristan used to do. Aaron just stood there, looking at where he had been. He looked down, expecting to find clothes but there were none. Holstering his gun, Aaron checked Foyet first. He was dead. He moved to Haley next and saw her starting to come around. How the hell was he going to explain this? He wracked his mind for something. He came up with nothing. 

“Haley?” Aaron asked.

“Aaron? Where is he?”

“He’s dead. He’d dead, Haley.”

“There was a man. He just appeared in the room and he shot him. Then the horrible man shot him in the shoulder and the other man fired back. I couldn’t…did I faint?”

“Yes you did. Haley, I…that man isn’t here anymore. He’s gone, and you can’t tell anyone about him.”

“How are you going to explain the blood?” Haley asked pointing at where there were several spots of blood on the floor. Aaron looked at her for a few seconds and then moved over to the cabinet where he knew a Swiss Army knife was kept. He grabbed it and opened the blade. He lifted it and made a shallow cut on the base of his neck. He dropped bits of blood on each spot that was on the carpet and then spread a few more around, as well as making sure it got all over his shirt. He tried to find where the bullet was but stopped when he saw the neat hole where it had gone in. It had been pulled out and scraped, exactly like his apartment. Given that the person was gone, Aaron was sure that it was Tristan again. There wasn’t a single thing that he could do now. 

“Where’s Jack? Where did you send him?”

Aaron turned to her and then looked up the stairs. Foyet had never made it up there but he needed to see Jack. He took off at a run to find his son. As he crested the stairs he heard a voice.

“Shush, someone’s coming. You are strong, Jack. Your dad will come and get you soon. Shush.”

Worried, Aaron opened the door but no one was there. He looked all around before he finally opened the cubby up in the window seat. Jack was lying there exactly like he did when Aaron worked in the office. He pulled him up into his arms and just held him. 

“I worked the case, daddy.”

“That’s wonderful buddy. Want to go see mommy?” 

Jack nodded, and Aaron stood up on shaky legs. When he got down the stairs, he found his team in the living room with Haley and Foyet’s body. He looked at Blake and saw her looking around. Did she know the truth of her TA? Or had Tristan...Aaron shook his head. Spencer. His name was Spencer. He’d lied to Aaron every single time as a kid. He knew exactly who he had been when they had met at the academy. Now was not the time to talk to her about it. That could come later. The front door opened, and Aaron turned, ready to grab his gun when ADD Michaels stepped inside the house. 

“What happened? I got a panicked call from Analyst Garcia that Foyet had your family.”

Aaron looked around and saw that Haley had moved a picture to cover up the bullet hole. Aaron thought quickly on his feet and told a tale of how he got there just as Foyet was getting ready to shoot. How he put two in him. There was no way to back that up, but he was hoping that it would all blow over. He spun a tale of pure fantasy, and the ADD just nodded. Haley told what she knew. She’d passed out before the shot and woke up in Aaron’s arms. Jack stayed in his dad’s arms the entire time. He wasn’t just protecting Spencer in this, he was protecting himself because there wasn’t a single person that would believe in time travel. When he’d been a kid, he’d believed in it and accepted it before he’d found proof, Tristan had proved it time and again though. Aaron sighed internally. He didn’t know what to call him. 

Medics treated his throat and checked over Jack and Haley. Aaron was shocked when the coroner was brought in and Foyet’s body removed before CSU got there. The ADD just smiled and said that it was open and shut. 

“We have a dead serial killer with no fallout. It’s open and shut. Horrible that he won’t stand trial for what he did in Boston but he can’t hurt anyone else. We already have confirmed his blood at your house from the first attack. He’s shown a predilection for going after you and he’s shown he’ll kill with no issue. Putting two in him was the best option.”

Aaron just watched him leave, shocked. He sat down on the couch with Jack in his lap. Haley was tucked into his side. Aaron didn’t know what to think. He didn’t know what to do. As he sat there he thought about his life. He needed to talk to Spencer. He really needed to talk to Spencer but he was afraid of the man running from the discussion, away from him. He looked at Blake, tossing the idea of asking her away. She would warn him. 

Morgan, Dave, and he escorted Haley and Jack to a hotel that Aaron was paying for. It was going to take a day or so for Morgan to change out the carpet and to fix the bullet hole in the wall. He had no clue how to explain that one. Morgan had already promised to come out and start ripping up the carpet as soon as he could the next day. They’d been given the next few days off, mainly for Aaron to settle himself in believing his family was alive. He was thankful. Haley would have questions and when she settled down, she’d start to ask what happened, and Aaron wanted to be the only one around for that. 

When Morgan and Dave left, Haley turned to Aaron. Jack was asleep on the bed; the day’s activities had worn him out. 

“I remember you, back in college. You talked about a friend named Tristan. I’ve never met him and you haven’t mentioned him in the present tense at all. Yet, Jack was talking about a Tristan that he’s made friends with. Had a play date here with him with you and then just now. A Tristan kept him company. That’s kind of odd.”

“Tristan is a kid of someone I know from work. He saw me coming into the house here and came over to say hello. He’s close to Jack’s age so I let them play together. As to the Tristan I knew when I was younger, he moved away just after my father died and I haven’t seen him after that.”

Haley eyed him like she didn’t want to believe him, but in the end she settled down on to the bed. 

“I have somethings that I need to take care of. If you need me, call. I’ll be by in the morning for breakfast.”

“Fine.” Haley was upset, but Aaron didn’t care. He had two things he had to do. He knew that she was scared. As he was grabbing his jacket to leave, Aaron saw the look on her face. It was a look of naked want. She hadn’t looked at him like that in years. Since before Jack had been born. Had she thought that they were going to sleep together? That he was doing this because he loved her? Aaron kept going because he was not going down that path again. 

A stop at the office to find what he needed before he met his goal for the evening. He knew that the FBI was still interested in Spencer, they’d not wanted to let him go, but health reasons were a good reason to allow someone to leave. Now that he knew the truth though, he wondered exactly how Spencer had gotten through the academy. Why had he even tried? Hadn’t he disappeared at least once? The personnel file for Spencer was surprisingly up to date. The ADD had updated with a new address just seven months before. Aaron was shocked at that. Why had they been keeping that close of an eye on him? 

Not going too far thinking about it, Aaron wrote down the address to program into his GPS, and then he was gone. No one of importance saw him come in and even if they had he could just say that he’d needed something from his office. It wasn’t hard to lie, not when one was so good at seeing the lies in others. 

The apartment that Spencer lived in was a little shocking. It was pretty nice. Nothing like he’d ever thought about Tristan living in. There was a guard sitting inside and Aaron flashed his badge and the man just sat back down. Aaron took the elevator to the fifth floor. He took a few deep breaths but the anger that had been building inside of him wasn’t going down. He’d met with Spencer outside several times. He stopped by all the time at the BAU to drop and/or pick up papers for Blake, pertaining to her class. He’d been out for drinks with the team twice now. There was plenty of time for him to tell him about who he really was. He wondered if Spencer was sitting on the other side of the door, waiting for him. The Spencer he had seen that day was the one form five years before. Had he been waiting for this day? Would he even be here? Then again that Spencer had only popped in and out. Had he had the chance to figure out the date? 

Knowing that just standing there wasn’t going to get a thing resolved. He knocked on the door. He made sure to knock loud enough for Spencer to hear him even if he was asleep. He listened close to the sound of feet on the floor. He was barefoot. When the door opened and Spencer’s eyes widened in shock, Aaron got angry. 

“Agent Hotchner? What are you doing here?”

That set him off. They were alone, and he was just going to act like they didn’t know each other? Aaron pushed him into the apartment and shut the door. When Spencer opened his mouth to speak again, Aaron grabbed him by the shoulder and shoved him in the wall right beside the door. The younger man’s eyes widened in fear and part of Aaron’s heart cracked a little at that. He’d seen that fear in Spencer’s eyes before and it was never a good thing. Still his anger was so great. He wanted to grab him by the neck. but he needed him able to talk. The little voice in his head that told him that this wasn’t him that he needed to calm down, he ignored that. 

Right up to the point that he felt something press against the back of his head and then a sound that filled his heart with fear, the sound of a cocking gun. A revolver at that. His mind supplied the information. There was nothing he could do. He inhaled to calm down and that’s when he smelled that the gun had been fired recently, the gunpowder was very strong. Who the hell was behind him? Who the hell was Spencer living with?

“Step back from him, Aaron and keep your hands up,” a very cold, male voice said and Aaron did as it asked. As soon as he raised his hands up after letting go of Spencer, the younger man skirted around him and took off to the other side of the room, if his footsteps were anything to go by. Aaron stayed still. The gun was still pressing against the back of his head. He startled a little when a hand reached for the gun on his hip. It was unlatched and then pulled free. “Don’t even try for your backup. Turn around.”

The gun was removed from his head and he heard the sound of not so soft feet stepping back from him, he turned. His eyes blinked because he wasn’t sure that he was seeing what he thought he was seeing. There were two Spencer’s in his view. The Spencer that he’d attacked, because there was no other word for it and a Spencer that looked a little older. He was standing funny. He looked him up and down, still with his own hands raised in the air. He had a holster at his hip for the revolver, and he was dressed in slacks and a sweater vest over a button up. His right arm was pressed down his side and along his stomach. He looked up and saw the gunshot wound. Spencer had been shot! Aaron took a step forward but Spencer raised the gun a little more to stop him. Aaron took a step back. 

The younger Spencer had Aaron’s gun in his hand and was slipping it into a gun safe before he moved forward to stand beside older Spencer. 

“Take his backup from his ankle,” older Spencer said and the younger did as asked. That gun went into the safe along with the other and Aaron watched as older Spencer sort of wavered and then was gone. Younger Spencer slammed the gun safe door shut and then just stared at Aaron.

“He…”

“He didn’t tell me who shot him, just that he was shot in the line of duty, and he got shot protecting his family. Then you came. He knew though. He hid. I should have known. I shouldn’t have answered the door.”

Aaron listened to his words but he couldn’t process them. The bullets in Foyet were revolver ammo. He hadn’t gotten a good enough look at the revolver to see what ammo it used. He hoped that the ammo wasn’t compared to what his gun had shot before. He hoped the ADD had been right, that it would never see the light of day. Every single little bit of anger left him as he watched Spencer move to the far side of the room and sit down in a chair. It wasn’t until the younger man tucked his feet up in the chair and dropped his chin on his knees to look at him that he truly felt like shit. 

“I’m sorry, Spencer. I truly, truly am. I’m so sorry,” Aaron said as he moved closer slowly. He watched as Spencer tensed as he dropped to his knees in front of him. He wasn’t seeing Spencer anymore. He was seeing Tristan. Running from him in the woods. He was remembering being held on the day of his father’s funeral. That Spencer had set aside a gun. That startling fact jumped to the front of his mind. He’d seen in the safe. Only his two guns were in it, but older Spencer, who did carry a gun, had to visit enough to warrant a safe. 

When Aaron moved to cup his cheek, Spencer tried to move away but Aaron kept up the movement. Until he was cupping the cheek of his friend. Spencer’s eyes closed and Aaron leaned up to kiss his forehead. It didn’t feel odd when he lifted Spencer’s legs and scooted up into the chair. It was an oversized chair and he fit with his back to the armrest. He dropped Spencer’s legs over him and then pulled him close. He could feel slight tremors in Spencer’s body. Adrenalin leaving him. 

“So, where did the name Tristan come from?” Aaron asked, trying to settle Spencer. Talking always settled Tristan. He hoped it was still true for Spencer.

“It’s my middle name. Spencer Tristan Reid. Mom is a professor of literature and Tristan and Isolde are her favorite characters. Dad didn’t want Tristan to be my first name so they settled on Spencer, one of mother’s favorite authors. Dad didn’t know that until later.” Spencer settled more against him, the weight was familiar even though it shouldn’t be. Aaron raised his arm and the younger man ducked down to where his head was on his shoulder. 

“No wonder I could never find you.”

“That and I grew up in Las Vegas, Nevada.”

Aaron pulled back to look at him in shock. He would have never thought that it was where Spencer was from. Why the hell had he been coming here to the DC area? Why New York? Was it because of Aaron? “I think you should start at the beginning.”

“Remember when you said you wanted to come and live with me? When you were going to Hargrave at first? I didn’t lie. I was born in 1981. I wasn’t even on my parents radar. And while mom was a traveler before she got sick and dad knew this, they never would have taken you in.” 

Aaron sighed at that. Near sixteen years between them. There was no way that Aaron ever would have looked at him as a friend if they had grown up down the block from each other. The only thing they shared were crappy childhoods. He tried to remember the date of Spencer’s birthday because it was close to his own. He just couldn’t place it. Looking at his watch which had the date, it struck him. It was today. “Today is your birthday. You are twenty eight today.” Saying the words out loud had Aaron wanting to shift their position. This was a horrible position for them to be sitting in. But he couldn’t make himself do it. He really couldn’t. Tristan had been the only one allowed to ever be this close besides Haley, and if he was honest with himself, while she had his love, there was something that stopped him from allowing her to be this close to him.

The smile from Spencer, Aaron could feel it on his neck as the younger man shifted a little. It was intimate but Aaron couldn’t push him away. “Yes, it is. Mom called me this morning.”

“And your father?”

“Haven’t heard from him since about two hours after ten year old me got back from your father’s funeral.”

“What?” Aaron wanted to jump up and go and find him, but the way that Spencer curled down farther into him had Aaron wrapping his arm around Spencer’s shoulders and rubbing at his opposite arm. 

“He left me and mom. Oh, he would leave enough money for us to survive on but I’ve not seen him since he left and he’s never checked on us.”

“Your mom was sick. How could he leave a ten year old with a sick mother? How did he expect you to care for her and yourself?”

“How can a father slap a five year old? Give him a bloody nose at age eight? Dad didn’t want to be saddled with a strange kid and a schizophrenic wife.”

Aaron stopped and applied that word to everything that Tristan had told him. How had he managed to go to school, take care of his mother, and handle his random time traveling spurts? How had he managed with the weeks he was in New York? Then he remembered that Tristan had been around nine then and Spencer said that it was after the funeral that his father had left. That’s when it started to make sense on why he never saw an above ten year old Tristan. Before he could ask to confirm, Spencer started to speak.

“I stopped traveling after that. Mom stopped when her schizophrenia manifested. Our minds protect ourselves. Even if we find the perfect meds and she’s lucid for the rest of her life, she’ll never travel again. I stopped and that’s why you’ve never seen a teenaged me. I figure that my brain decided I had enough on my plate to not have to deal with it was well. I was afraid at first but then I remembered that an older me had come to the funeral so I knew that I got it back. I just didn’t know when. Adult me watched you on the edges when you were a child, only stepping in when I knew that I was needed and not a child. Like when you were eight. It’s a little creepy, adult me hanging out with a child. Even if we are friends, with the turning of the tides, I didn’t want to be thrown into jail.”

“Is that why little you hasn’t come around much?”

“Yes. I do have a confession to make.”

“Okay.”

“I creeped you out on the Georgetown campus. I was that guy you chased.”

Aaron laughed and thought back over the years. He tried to place Spencer’s face all over. There was one place it was startlingly obvious. “My wedding to Haley. STR. The books, the purse, the tie. That you was!”

“Yes. And on a beach in the Hamptons.”

Inhaling sharply, he thought about that man on the beach, the same man from the bar. He pulled in all the men over the years that he’d sworn he’d known. The moments of déjà vu that had spilled over him. 

“How are Haley and Jack?”

“You know exactly how Jack is.”

“What?” Spencer asked, turning his head up to look at Aaron. There was pure confusion in his eyes. 

“There was one of you in the room with him.”

“There was?” Spencer turned to where he was fully facing him, Aaron lost the band of warmth on his side and he wanted it back but the look that he was giving him shocked him. “I never…Shit.”

“You didn’t know that’s where you were?” 

“Not until you…There was no current calendar in your office and I didn’t see Jack. He heard me moving and kept quiet but I heard him shift because I was so quiet and that’s when I started to talk. I introduced myself as Tristan and he said that he had a new friend named Tristan that his daddy brought him over to play. I asked if he was Jack. We talked and then the gunshots went off. I talked him out of crying. Settled him, and then when I heard someone on the stairs, I concentrated really hard to get the hell out of there. It’s come and go but sometimes I can do it. I hated leaving Jack, but he was hidden and if I was in the room whoever was coming in would look harder for Jack.” 

“You did fine. That was me. Jack’s fine. He’s with Haley at a hotel. I came to talk to you.” Aaron watched as Spencer settled against the other armrest. It was easy with Spencer. It felt normal to settle with him like this. “So when did you start to travel in time again?” 

“The day I met adult you for the first time when I wasn’t traveling, so that means the day of my graduation from the academy. We touched and I don’t know but that’s why I ran. I didn’t want to disappear in the middle of the hall and not in front you either. I wasn’t ready for traveling and I wasn’t ready to meet you. I knew that you were in the FBI but I hadn’t expected you to be there at the graduation.”

“I went every year up until that one,” Aaron said. Realizing that he had stopped then and he hadn’t even noticed it. He stopped and thought about it. He hadn’t felt the need. “I stopped going.”

Spencer smiled. Aaron pulled on him until he turned into him and laid his head back down on his shoulder. It was comfortable. Spencer curled into him and then laughed when his stomach growled. 

“So what’s your excuse for not eating now?”

“Got busy reading over papers for Blake’s class. Lost track of time.”

“So what place is good that delivers because I haven’t eaten dinner either.”

Aaron watched Spencer as he moved to the drawer with takeaway menus. When he came back over, Aaron took the menus. Spencer looked a little lost until Aaron pulled him back down. In the privacy of Spencer’s place and even his own, he didn’t mind this. Tristan had never liked touching when they touched where people could see on the few times they played together out and about on the street. 

“So, I’ve always kept my questions to myself because I didn’t want to make you uneasy but exactly how fast do you read?”

“Twenty thousand words per minute. I thought I did better at hiding how fast I read.”

“No, not really. You didn’t hide and when I didn’t ask, you kind of let yourself go.”

“I also have an eidetic memory and an IQ of 187. It’s why Gideon wanted me for the BAU. I spent days debating taking it. Before I started to travel again. That kind of threw a kink in my plans. There isn’t a way to hide it. I had to leave the FBI. I was able to get a part time job at Georgetown while studying for another degree.”

“That’s right. Gideon said that you had three PhDs and two BAs. How the hell did…what age did you actually graduate?”

“Twelve, like mom wanted. Cal-Tech not long after and I was happy with classes. Neighbors on the block helped me to take care of mom while I was in class. Tutoring on campus and other things helped me get money to get back and forth between Pasadena and Vegas.”

“Where is your mom?” Aaron set the menus down and then tilted Spencer’s face up to his own. 

“I put her in Bennington Sanitarium when I turned eighteen. So, exactly a decade ago. I could tell you down to the moment if you wish.”

“We never had a childhood did we? Our fathers messed that up royally, but we had each other right?”

“Yes, we did. And that was enough for me. Knowing that you were in my future as a friend was the only thing that got me through high school. Things got so much better when I got to Cal-Tech. The bullies went away and I got rivals. Rivals I could deal with. Still I kept my head down and did what I needed to do. Pick something, Aaron. Or you are getting egg drop soup.”

Aaron couldn’t help it, he leaned over and held Spencer’s legs still with one arm and then went after his side with his free hand. Spencer realized what he was going to do too late. He tried to escape but Aaron tickled him until he screamed for mercy. 

“Chinese, General Tso’s Chicken.” Aaron smiled as Spencer tried to catch his breath. Spencer grabbed the menus and put them back in the drawer as he called in their orders. Aaron stood up to look around the apartment. His focus before had been on his anger and then on Spencer. There were books on shelves and other little things all over. He stopped at the bookshelves to look and ran his hands down the spines of the books as he read the titles. He grabbed one of the books and pulled it free. It was the exact copy of _The Secret Garden_ that he’d read to Tristan. That’s when he realized that Spencer had brought his clothes with him and taken then back at the house earlier. 

“How are you able to take your clothes with you? You never could as a child.”

“When I was younger, I was able to use some science to figure out exactly what kind of electrical field I put off when I traveled. The problem was that the field didn’t extend to anything that I was wearing. I figured it out and over the years as a teen I refined and made it better.” Spencer moved closer to him and showed him his wrist. There was a leather strap there. He unwrapped it from his skin and held it out to Aaron. He wasn’t expecting there to be that much weight in it. “I have a small device in there that kind of extends that field. I have a few in my messenger bag as well. When I travel it all travels with me. I carried it with me all the time when I was a teen and even then at graduation I had it in a pocket. I slipped it on quickly when I started to run from you.” 

Aaron handed the leather bracelet back, and Spencer wrapped it around his wrist again. Aaron settled down on the couch again with a random book from the shelf in hand. He looked at the book and then back up at Spencer. "You always read to me. Did you do that from memory?"

"Most of the time. Books that I really enjoy, I do like to read at a much slower pace. I like to savor the words." Spencer was leaning against the counter in the kitchen. Aaron appreciated the view. Allowing himself to look. He smiled as Spencer turned to look at something on the counter. He was smiling and Aaron couldn't help but smile as well. "So Haley is in a hotel. Jack's with her. Are you going back to your apartment?"

"I don't know. I can't go back to the hotel, but I don't know that I'll be able to sleep tonight."

Spencer cocked his head to the side. "Why can't you go back to the hotel?"

"Haley, seemed to hint that she'd be just fine sharing a bed." Aaron looked away to stare out a window. 

"Oh. Has she offered that before?" Spencer's voice was calm and collected and when Aaron looked up at him, there was nothing on his face. Almost too blank.

"No. I know that it was just a reaction to almost dying but I didn't want it. I've not even attempted to start anything with anybody. I focus on my job and on Jack and that's fine. It wasn't until I saw the look on her face that I even thought about the fact that I was lonely and I'm not so much. I feel like I'm waiting." Aaron rubbed his hands down his face. "Sorry. I'm just tired."

"You can stay here. I have a perfectly comfortable couch. I fall asleep on it more, I think, than I sleep in my bed."

"You think?" Aaron looked at him and Spencer ducked his head and smiled. "What's the exact number?"

"The average is one to one unless it's finals. Then I'm on the couch more than the bed."

"When you fall asleep out here, book in hand?" Aaron was about to stand up and move over to him when a knock sounded at the door. He moved instead to the door and opened it. Before Spencer could get there, he paid and tipped the driver, taking the food. He shut the door and Spencer was just looking at him. 

"I would have paid."

"I know. You are letting me stay the night. Let me feed you."

"And all the times that you fed me growing up?"

"I got more than you know out of that. So who is the special man in your life?" Aaron handed Spencer his container of food and the younger man just looked at him in shock. 

"I don't have a special man."

"But..." Aaron set his food down and looked at him. "You had a picture of your son. Given the son's age compared to how old you were when you showed me, he would have been born already."

"Oh!" Spencer blushed. "Yes, the boy who will become my son is already born but he's my partner's and we've not started a relationship yet. I actually don't know when we will. I know roughly but there's not a specific day."

"You've met him?" Aaron was interested in it. He was interested in making sure that Spencer was happy. His own life might not be what he wanted, but he'd make sure that Spencer was happy.

It should have been weird, when they went to bed. Aaron had a go bag in the car with sleeping clothes. He went first taking a shower and then Spencer. They started off on opposite sides of the bed but when Aaron woke up wrapped around Spencer, he wasn't shocked. If he had a lifeline in his life, it was the man in his arms. So instead he curled his head down into the back of Spencer's neck and slept a little longer.


	46. January 2010

Aaron looked around the room that Doctor Malcolm had his office set up in. He couldn't quite place what exactly was wrong with the room. Before he could even attempt to think more on it, a knock came at the door. Aaron turned to look at the doctor.

"Come in," Malcolm yelled. 

The door opened and in stepped Spencer. Except that it wasn't his Spencer. This Spencer had a different haircut and since he'd eaten dinner with Spencer before heading out on the case, Aaron was sure it wasn't him. On his hip was a revolver and he had an FBI badge on display.

"Sorry I'm late, Hotch. Traffic was terrible," Spencer said as he shut the door. The younger man looked up and looked right at Dave. "Rossi. Doctor Malcolm, yes?"

"Yes, who are you?"

"SSA Doctor Spencer Reid."

Dave raised an eyebrow at the words but said nothing. He turned to start to question the doctor about the location of his daughter. Spencer started to move around the room. Looking at everything. Aaron wanted to call him in. He didn't want to call attention to him though. Aaron just watched as his eyes roamed everything. He ended up settling on the far side of the desk, beside the doctor

"That's the end of this meeting."

"Where's your daughter, doctor?" Dave demanded.

"And Agent Rossi, if you try to talk to her. A mentally ill woman without her knowing what she's doing..."

"Do you know about the women she's keeping?" Dave asked. Aaron was leaving the questioning up to him, he had the doctor on edge, and he would be the one to get him to talk.

The doctor continued like Dave hadn't spoken. "...and have no medical or legal counsel present, you'll have no case. Do you understand me? None."

Spencer was now messing with the items behind the desk. The doctor was getting more agitated but Aaron wasn't sure who was the cause, Dave or Spencer. 

"We'll keep the police here in case Samantha drops in for a visit. Let's go, Aaron, Reid," Dave said and turned.

"Hey, a really fast question," Spencer said. He pointed behind the desk. "Why are these toys here?"

"I use them in my therapy." The doctor didn't look at him. 

"No, I understand that. But why are they way up on this shelf, away from where any kids can actually reach them?" 

Aaron watched the doctor's face at the question. There was something there. Aaron stepped closer to the two of them. A little afraid. 

"They're reminders of patients I've helped."

"Let me ask you something." Spencer pulled a stuffed animal down off the shelf and set it on the desk. "What was the name of the girl you helped with this one?" 

"Jenny Larson."

Spencer grabbed another. "And this one? What was the name of the girl you helped with this one?"

"Abigail Moore."

"How about this one?" A third one was set down. 

"Linda Krauss."

"These girls are like what nine, nine or twelve years old, I'm assuming."

"My PhD is on the effect of trauma on prepubescent girls. I do not appreciate what you are implying."

Aaron took a step closer but Dave stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. 

"Oh, I'm not implying anything. I'm making an inference. An inference is an educated guess and based on that, I form a hypothesis." The doctor was fully turned to Spencer now, and the younger man was staring him down while talking. "For instance, my hypothesis here is that after you raped your daughter, you submitted her to electroshock treatment to make sure she stayed quiet."

"This is outrageous." The doctor turned to Aaron and Dave but they both ignored him. 

"And then out of guilt you bought her toys. More specifically you bought her a line of dolls. Because that's what serial molesters do. They give gifts. So you continued the pattern with your other patients, and once they left your care you added their toys to your collection." Spencer was pissed but it wasn't something the doctor or even Dave would have known. 

"I'm sorry, you can't back up your story, doctor."

"This is why I love my job, doctor," Spencer answered back. Aaron felt a weird twinge in his gut at the way that Spencer said the word doctor. "Because my lab? It's a jury of your peers. My tests will be Jenny Larson, Abigail Moore, and Linda Krauss." Spencer moved to sit on the edge of the desk in front of the doctor and kind of leaned over him. The twinge in his gut was becoming a full blown heat and Aaron didn't know what to do. He'd only felt something like it once so long ago in a closet in a random house near the Georgetown campus. "The D.A. will put them on the stand and I'm going to personally bring these dolls in and we're going to watch how they react."

"Or," Dave started his voice soft compared to the louder voice Spencer had been using. "You could tell us where your daughter is and we'll tell the DA you cooperated."

The rest of the time was posturing with the doctor. Aaron was the first out the door with Dave on his heels, Spencer was just at the edge of the door when the doctor shouted an address. 

"You want to know how I figured you out? Those toys you take care of them." Spencer pointed at the lower ones while he walked up to the desk again. "These ones you treasured. But you know what? The collection's not complete. Where are they?"

Aaron supervised getting the dolls while he left Dave and Spencer in the SUV to wait on him. LEOs were meeting them to take the doctor into custody. Spencer had files open on the back seat of the SUV and Dave was watching him in the visor mirror. Now that he had the time, he could see that the revolver was the same one that he'd used to scare the shit out of Aaron. He wondered if this Spencer was from before Foyet being shot or after. He wasn't going to ask.

"Hotch, do you mind if I take the lead in dealing with Samantha?" Spencer looked up at him as he got into the SUV driver seat. Aaron turned back to look at him and was about to make the comment that he couldn't be a part of it since he wasn't an FBI agent when he remembered the badge on his waist. What the hell had caused Spencer to come back to the FBI with his traveling in time issue? How was he doing that? There was the chance he could disappear on a case. 

"Let the kid try. He's had practice."

Spencer's head shot up to look at Dave. Aaron could see the anger in his eyes. There was something there in those eyes. He needed to distract him. 

"I'm well aware that you probably looked me up, Agent Rossi but I would rather you spoke plainly or we shall see exactly who has the bigger stick."

Aaron was shocked that those words had come out of his mouth. He turned back to the file. Aaron decided it was better to get to the house where Samantha was staying. If she had the women anywhere, that's where they would be. 

Aaron was loathe to send Spencer in there, but Dave had made a good point and it was obvious that whatever point in time that this Spencer came from, he was in the BAU. There would be some interesting reports to keep this out. He'd need to talk to the entire team. He also needed to ask Spencer if Blake knew exactly what his "health" issue was that kept him out of the BAU and the FBI. 

When the call came for medics, Aaron wasn't worried. He hadn't heard a gunshot and Spencer sounded fine. Dave escorted Spencer out and they all three settled in at the SUV while the medics dealt with the captive women. Aaron was about to ask when Spencer handed over a picture to him. Aaron looked at it, and he saw that it was a group shot at some random police department. He could see black clothed cops while the team was all gathered around a whiteboard. Everyone on the team was looking at the camera, all seven of them. Spencer though was turned with his body facing the side, Morgan's arm was around his shoulders, forcing his face to look at the camera. Aaron was standing on his other side a big smile on his face. That face was one that he knew only Spencer and Jack got. 

"I'm actually still considered an inactive agent. I was kept on."

"Who knows?" Aaron asked.

Spencer looked at Dave and sighed. "That I need to wait on but I know that I go home with you on the jet. Everything will be answered then. 

"So I remember a young rookie who asked me once about a member in the BAU named Spencer. He looked downright upset when I told him that no one had ever worked in the BAU with a first or last name of Spencer. I'm guessing that you are that Spencer? Blake's TA? Who has a set of credentials that list him as part of the BAU?"

"That would be me."

"Hmm." Dave just looked at him as the rest of the team pulled up in the second SUV. Prentiss, JJ, and Morgan stopped at the sight of Spencer standing there but Blake came right up to him, hugging him. When she asked a silent question, Spencer moved his hand to a thumbs up position and lifted his fist in the air. She nodded at him. Aaron was pretty sure that she had just asked him how old he was and he answered older which given the picture, he'd already figured that out. He handed the picture back over and Spencer tucked it back into his wallet. 

"Hotch, we've been pulled back to Quantico as quickly as possible. The ADD wants us there. The LEO's are going to fax us everything that we need. I have the jet on standby. He um...well he told me that we'd have a guest on the way home. Is Doctor Reid the guest?"

The questions waited until they were airborne and able to move around the cabin of the jet. Blake hadn't been the only one to give a weird look when Spencer took a seat on the interior of one of the two seater sets and Aaron took the outside. When it came time for moving about, the team came to them. Spencer laid his gun and his credentials on the table. Morgan picked up the credentials and the clipped on ID that came out of his messenger bag that Aaron hadn't realized he'd slipped into the SUV before he'd gone into Malcolm's office. 

"This has an issue date of today," Morgan said as he set it back down.

"Yes. I know exactly who you think I am."

"You're Blake's TA, Doctor Reid."

"Yes and no. I've not been Blake's TA for three years at this point in my life."

"What do you mean? When I picked up Blake two weeks ago you were teaching her class."

"Thirty?" Blake asked. 

"Thirty-one."

"But Doctor Reid is twenty eight," JJ said. 

Aaron looked at the team, seeing the slightly guilty looks on their faces. It was astounding how much the team had seemingly looked into him. The narrowing of Spencer's eyes told him that he had caught on. 

"When we land, you'll have your proof, for now you will have to go on trust. I understand that for some, trust comes after a very long time." Spencer looked at Morgan when he said that. 

"I remember a case I worked. We had a near hysterical girl who we needed to get calm to ask her where her father took her mother before he raped and murdered her. Damnedest thing in the world, watching this little boy appear, naked as the day he was born, walk over to her and talk to her, he got her settled and she told us what we needed. After we'd come back with her mother, unharmed, the boy smiled at me and disappeared before my eyes. If Jason hadn't seen it as well as many locals, I would have called myself crazy."

"Sheila just needed someone closer to her age. She was eight, I was six."

"How many members of the BAU did you stalk?" Aaron asked, sounding hurt even to his own ears. When Spencer looked at him with anger in his eyes, he wanted to take the words back. 

"None. But the BAU is my future and I go on to big things, as I've told you before."

"Before?" Blake asked. She looked between the two of them and then her eyes widened. "That's Aaron. THAT'S Aaron?"

"That's Aaron."

"Who exactly is Aaron?" Dave asked. Spencer spared a glance at him. 

"I popped in and out of BAU cases and will continue to do so until the last day that I travel."

Spencer spent the rest of the trip avoiding answering personal questions by telling the entire team in length about the physics of how he travels, why he travels, how he's able to get his clothes to go with him in the future but doesn't drop off a bracelet to himself in the past. There wasn't much that Aaron didn't know about the slightly personal side, but the science behind it, as well who exactly was studying it the world over, was interesting. Aaron also got distracted by how happy Spencer seemed when telling the team all of it. 

That was when it hit him exactly how lonely Spencer had to have been growing up with the home life that he did, throwing in his time travelling as well as his geniusness, he was a damn sight lonelier than Aaron had ever been. Aaron was lonely by his own choice. He connected when he wanted but Spencer, Spencer had only ever had him and a sick mother. 

When the call was made that the jet was approaching, the team finally split back off to their seats. The team wasn't quite believing Spencer's story, and Aaron understood. He'd believed Spencer when they were younger, but there was an innocence to it all then. Now it was nothing like that. He'd also seen him come and go so many times by the time that Tristan had stopped coming around. 

Aaron was the first off the jet and he was quite shocked to see the ADD with another Spencer standing at the bottom of the stairs. Aaron heard the halting of movement as each member stepped off the jet. Spencer was the last off. Aaron had his eyes on younger Spencer as the older one stepped out of the cabin of the jet. Down the steps he moved, and he looked at Aaron and smiled before stepping up to his younger self. The younger one started to smile and then gave a little wave and then the older one was gone. The remarks of surprise from the team, minus Blake, told Aaron that they hadn’t truly believed at all until that moment. 

“I’d like to introduce you to Doctor Spencer Reid, he’s going to be joining your team. On paper, his start date was the start of the case so please do add him in your reports. Doctor Reid will give you all the rest of the breakdown, I have a meeting I need to get to.” The ADD waved and then was turning away. Aaron tried to meet Spencer’s eyes but every time he almost had it, he’d look away. The ADD stopped at the door of his car, turning back to them. “Analyst Garcia is hosting a very precocious young boy in her office at the current. Might I suggest going back to meet him?”

Aaron watched Spencer blush even more. That answered who the child was. There were two SUVs waiting for them. Aaron wondered exactly how the ADD had gotten the brass to sign off on another member for the team. That was eight now, if one included Garcia, and Aaron wholeheartedly did. He moved to the lead SUV and got in, waiting for the others to pick a vehicle and pile in. Morgan, Prentiss, and JJ chose the other one and Aaron waited. Watching Spencer’s face. The three that believed in him, knew of him were in one vehicle while the three still slightly skeptical ones were in the other. 

Spencer stepped up to Morgan’s SUV and Aaron’s heart fell a little bit. He needed to corner Spencer before he left to figure out exactly what was wrong. Spencer had already proven himself a capable agent. 

“He always talked about Aaron. Never more than just the first name but I didn’t picture anyone like you. So exactly when did you meet him? Your timeline, and how old was he?”

“I was five. It was the day that Sean was born. He was four. I’m sure that the rest can wait. The others will want to know as well.”

“You’ve been seeing Spencer as an adult?” Blake asked.

“Off and on and always just enough of a distance in time that I didn’t put it together, of course now I have. He’s popped in and out of my life as an adult and I didn’t know it.”

“Hmm,” Dave said. Aaron looked over at him when they stopped at a light. Dave had his thinking face on. “So…what exactly did Michaels do to get Reid into the building today?”

“What?” Aaron asked. 

“Spencer runs things to me here but he makes sure that he’s in and out. He doesn’t want to run into some of the uppers. They took no for an answer when he quit just after graduation. I’m not saying that they would force him into the BAU but what kind of offer becomes an offer that can’t be refused?”

Aaron sighed as he pulled past the checkpoint onto Marine Base Quantico’s property. He was certain that Spencer might have been cornered but his addition to this case meant that this case was always the start of it. There was only a three year difference in ages between the Spencer that had so deftly taken Malcolm apart and the one that was in the SUV behind him. There would be bumps in getting him up to that but the ability to gage the situation when and where he could go when he traveled meant that he was good at profiling already. 

The trip from SUV to sixth floor was long with seven people inside an elevator that didn’t know exactly what to say or exactly how to start a conversation. It was the quietest that Aaron had ever seen his team. The bullpen was empty when the elevator doors opened. That almost never happened except really late at night. There was the noise of laughing coming from inside the round table room. Aaron looked up to see Garcia sitting at the table with a boy beside her. He was sitting on the table his hands moving around like he was telling a story. When a hand tucked hair behind his head, Aaron saw that it was a five years old Tristan. 

“Bossman, who is the cutie puttie? The ADD said you’d explain when you go here.” Garcia smiled at him as she spoke. Tristan didn’t turn to look at him. Instead he tucked his feet up onto the table and wrapped his arms around them. The clothes he was wearing fit him better than many of the things Aaron had on hand for him at the house. How had Michaels found clothes for him so quickly? “Bossman?” 

“It’s fine, Garcia. He’s just a little shy.” Aaron kept his voice calm and centered. Tristan’s head shot up and looked at him. There was such relief in those eyes at finding a familiar face that Aaron couldn’t do anything but step up to the table. Tristan clambered to his feet and ran across the table, jumping into Aaron’s arms. He was like a monkey, wrapping arms and legs around him. His whole body was shaking and Aaron turned to Spencer. 

“Hello, Tristan,” Spencer said. The boy turned his head to where it wasn’t buried in Aaron’s neck and he felt the boy relax all at once. His arms though held tight. It wasn’t hard to understand that he didn’t want Aaron to let him go. Aaron moved to a chair and with Spencer’s help sat down. As soon as he was seated, Tristan just seemed to pass out. 

“What happened?” Aaron asked Spencer.

But Garcia thought that he was asking her. “I don’t know. The ADD brought him down and introduced me to him. He asked me to keep him entertained until you guys got back. He was fine until you showed up.”

“Tristan is very good at hiding. He was around a stranger and he can’t show weakness to strangers,” Spencer said. He pulled his own suit jacket off and draped it over Tristan. “I remember this well. The doctors are switching mom’s medicines. She’s in the middle of a three day episode. This is the third day. Day one I got out and went to spend the day with you at Hargrave. The second day I stayed out of the house. Dad’s at work right now and I just got out of school for the day. I came home to find mom throwing stuff and I just took off running.”

“Is he hurt?” Aaron asked. Spencer lifted the coat off and Tristan shifted and groaned. Aaron watched as Spencer raised the boy’s shirt to see a large bruise starting to form. He lowered the shirt back and covered him back up. Aaron petted the head resting on him. “Everyone this is Tristan.”

“I prefer Tristan for when I am younger,” Spencer said as he took the seat next to Aaron. 

“Where did the clothes come from?” Aaron asked.

“The ADD keeps some on hand for me. I’ve appeared here a lot of over the years. That’s why I’ve never actually been classified as having quit. I’ve been on leave. I don’t get pay but I have ID so that I can move around the place.”

“You…The ADD has brought a boy to me before to watch him. I thought it was a nephew. This is you?” Garcia asked. 

“Yes. This is me.”

“Why did he run to Hotch?” Prentiss asked. 

“Because I’ve been traveling to Hotch since I was four.”

“I would assume that episode means schizophrenia?” Dave asked.

“Yes. Her episodes trigger my traveling more than anything else.”

“Yet, he didn’t recognize you the first time you met. And he’s not acted like this around you before,” JJ said.

“Tristan is my middle name. My mother traveled like I do before her schizophrenia started. It was a very high probability that I would travel as well. There is research done into it. I had a twenty percent chance of not having the gene that causes this. My children, if I choose to have them, would have a fifty-fifty. My grandkids would have a twenty percent chance of having the gene that causes it. The rest of the generations after would also carry the twenty percent chance. ADD Michaels had a great uncle who was the start, so there was no chance of the ADD having it but he grew up around it. 

“How long do you stay?” Aaron asked as he shifted a little, moving the small body to lie on his other shoulder. “I ask because I am getting hungry and I thought pizza would be a good idea.”

“I stay through pizza,” Spencer smiled. 

“So you visited adult Hotch as a kid?” Morgan asked. His voice was hard and Aaron looked at him. Trying to figure out what exactly was wrong. 

“I have. I’ve visited and played with Jack and I also had a small stint as a pick-pocket in the streets of New York.”

“New…” Prentiss started to laugh as she looked at little Tristan and then back at him. “You were the one who nabbed Hotch’s wallet and did a runner with it!”

“Yes. That was me. He also got me to the hotel so that I could have at least one good night’s sleep. By that point in time, I’d been there two weeks. I needed the night’s sleep. He also cared for my wounds that I’d gotten before and after arriving in New York. Adult me has also visited Hotch a few times when he was a kid. But the majority of our visits took place when we were both under the age of eighteen, Morgan, and I don’t appreciate what that question meant.” Spencer was looking Morgan directly in the eye as the other man sat down at the table. The rest of the team took seats with Blake sitting on Spencer’s other side. There was a bit of tension that only stopped when Morgan was the first to look away. He was fairly certain he knew exactly where Morgan’s mind had gone and he was glad that Spencer took care of it. 

“So you sort of grew up with bossman?” Garcia asked. Aaron wasn’t sure that he liked the look on her face. 

“In a very weird fashion, yes.”

“Was he cute?” JJ asked. 

Aaron groaned and turned his whole chair so that he was looking at Spencer. Spencer was steadfastly not looking at him though. A smile quirked his face and he laughed. 

“I can’t be an accurate judge of that. He was my first and only real friend until I got older.”

There was something there that piqued Aaron’s memory. Then he remembered the bar and Dave and Ethan Marks. “Ethan Marks, the piano player. The ADD had Dave check on him when we were in New Orleans. There was a kid that came and played with him. Was that you?”

“Yes. I remember seeing you in the crowd but I didn’t come to you because I was afraid of you making me go home with you. Which in all fairness wouldn’t have helped.”

“Why not?” Prentiss asked.

“Spencer was born in Las Vegas and raised there,” Blake answered.

“And you appeared in Hotch’s backyard?” JJ asked.

“Mom spent her life going to England. Her best friend lived over there. She died when mom was twenty five. Distance really isn’t an issue.”

“Food?” Dave interrupted. Aaron had his back to him but the look on Spencer’s face said that he wasn’t upset. Aaron moved to stand up, and when he did Tristan woke a little bit. Aaron shifted him over to Spencer and the boy settled quickly.

“Do you want your pizza normal?” Aaron asked. Spencer nodded. Pizza was a common enough occurrence at the office and in the field that Aaron knew the other’s orders by heart. He stepped out of the room and placed an order for more than enough pizza. 

When Aaron got back up to the room, Spencer was seated on the couch, holding a sobbing Tristan. He looked like he was trying to calm the boy down but the boy was having none of it. Aaron moved over and surprised both of them by just pulling Tristan out of Spencer’s lap right into his own. Tristan tried to fight him, but when he saw it was Aaron he settled down quickly. 

“In my office is a copy of _The Secret Garden_. Fetch it for me would you?” Aaron asked. Spencer was up and moving before the words were fully out of his mouth and it was only two minutes before he was back in the room. It was a different copy than they had read as kids. That copy was still in the hideaway. This was a beautifully illustrated copy that Aaron never wanted to admit how much money he’d spent on it. He’d never told Haley, but given the look Spencer was giving him; he knew how much he’d spent on it. Tristan curled into his lap, head on shoulder and side of his body curled into Aaron’s front. The book was propped on Tristan’s stomach and the boy settled there and listened as Aaron started to read.

In the background he could hear the team talking, Spencer was talking about his life and about what to do when he disappeared and reappeared. He let their words go in one ear and out the other. When Tristan leaned up to look more at the book, Aaron knew he was settled. They’d made it about thirty pages into the book. The boy took the book from him and settled down on the couch with the book propped on his legs, reading. The team had stopped talking when he had so all of their eyes were glued on Tristan as he flipped through the book at an astonishing rate. 

“You know, this is the event that settles that book as my comfort book right?” Spencer asked. Aaron only smiled as he moved back to the table to sit down. Tristan was more than content to sit and read. “It was a nightmare. Even I don’t remember exactly what it was about.”

“It’s fine,” Aaron said as he reached over and squeezed Spencer’s hand on top of the table. 

“If any of you have objections now or in the future, just speak up.”

“So exactly who got Malcolm to confess to molesting his daughter?” Blake asked.

“That would be Doctor Reid, the other one,” Dave said with a smile on his face. “I knew that something was off about the room and I could tell that Aaron could as well. So Reid knocks on the door and comes in. He just apologizes and blames traffic. I’m shocked as hell to see him and the look on Aaron’s face is shock but there’s something more to it. Like it’s not a shock to see him but that it’s a shock to see something with him. That’s when I saw the gun and the badge. I knew that he hadn’t been reinstated and if Strauss had sent backup, she would have called.”

“He starts looking around the room. Actually moving around it and looking. He spots what we missed. There are kids’ toys all over but there are a select few that are up where no one can reach them.” Aaron looked at Spencer to see that he was blushing. 

“Trophies,” Spencer said. 

“Exactly. Although I don’t think he was expecting the jab about a jury of his peers being your lab.”

The rest of the team started to laugh and then the talk turned to smaller things. A call from security interrupted their talking. The pizza was there. Aaron took Morgan with him to go and get it. 

“Get enough to feed an army?”

“Spencer dodged on exactly how long Tristan was going to be staying. I’d rather Tristan eat cold pizza than anything else if he’s here for a day or two if we get called out on another case.”

“You’d leave him in an apartment for days by himself?” Morgan asked, shocked.

“What do you think happens Morgan when he appears somewhere? That there’s a version of the family to take him in? We’ve seen him in New York, New Orleans, here in DC. At age nine he survived for two weeks on the streets of New York. An apartment with running water, TV, books, and handy food is not going to be a problem.”

“What if he’s hurt?”

“He’ll travel. The body fights and takes him home when he’s injured. If the pain is great sometimes he’ll pop somewhere else but he always ends up home for a long while. You don’t have to worry about him in my place or Spencer’s. Obviously whatever happens has already happened and look, he’s still here.”

Aaron had stopped second guessing himself when it came to a younger Tristan. He’d adopted the mentality that it had already happened and he lived so whatever he was doing had to be right. Morgan seemed to accept that. 

It was hours later when the team had enough of their questions answered. Tristan had read through at least half of the books in Aaron’s office, having wandered that way to put up _The Secret Garden_ after he finished it when he was done eating pizza and had just never come back out. Aaron had talked Spencer into coming with him to the house where no one would bat an eye at seeing Tristan. 

Tom was outside when they pulled up, sitting in the backyard looking up at the sky, despite the weather of January. It was a clear night but the air was frigid. 

“Aaron,” Tom greeted as he stepped close. Tristan bounded out of the back seat of the car and took off for the woods. “Where did you pick him up from?”

“He showed up at work.”

“I’ve not seen him that young in a while. I get a sullen ten year old most of the time. Eats like a bird.”

Spencer laughed and it was then that Tom seemed to notice him for the first time. Tom looked at him and just stared. Spencer smiled back at him and then waved. It took several seconds for the man to start to laugh. 

“You had to have grown like a weed to go from that small to that tall.” Tom held out his hand and Spencer was hesitant but he shook it. Aaron felt a little upset that Tom had recognized him with no issue while Aaron never had. 

“I grew very tall while in college. Spencer Reid.”

Aaron was a little shocked that he gave the name over so quickly, but then he was a part of Aaron’s life now on a near full time basis. 

“The sprite’s not going to be staying the night here is he?”

“No. He’s already home. Ran to the hideaway and stripped the clothes off. They are in a pile to take back to the BAU.” Spencer patted Aaron’s shoulder and moved down the same path that Tristan had taken into the woods.

“So is that current him or a past…well you know what I mean.”

“It’s the current him. He’s on my team now.”

“Really?”

“He should have been for about six years now but with his issues, he had to step down. I’m sure that he’ll explain it to you more.”

“Have you two eaten dinner? I spent the day lounging and I was getting ready to make myself some soup.” Tom pointed in to where Aaron could see the kitchen light on. 

“Yes, we ate pizza with Tristan. Go ahead in. You don’t need to entertain us. We’ll be gone before you go to bed I am sure.”

“Have a good night, Aaron. Tell the sprite the same.” Tom moved inside the house and Aaron watched him lock the door and set the new alarm. That had been installed only a few months before. He’d had one on it for years but it had been old and the threat of Foyet had him buy a new one. He’d wanted to make sure that Tom was as protected as he could be. He knew the man could fire a gun and there was a shotgun in his bedroom but he felt better with better security.

Aaron waited for Tom to get into the kitchen before he started back to where Spencer was. He moved to the hideaway but found it empty. He looked around and decided to go to the pond. There he found Spencer, sitting at the edge, looking at the frozen water. He slipped down beside him and pulled Spencer close, enveloping him in his warmth. Spencer settled there with no complaint. 

“So…why didn’t you tell even Blake that this was coming?”

“I didn’t know it was. I knew I joined the team but no older me has told me when. Michaels called me and said that he had a younger me there that was upset. I came to settle him and that’s when older me called from a payphone. He told him that he was helping with the case and that he knew I was sitting in the office. There are a few addendums to me working but most of them are things that the FBI can’t do. It seems that I am not the first traveler that they have employed. I am the first on such an out there unit but Michaels wants this to work. Of course, we both know that it does.”

“What does your future partner think of the job coupled with your traveling? Do you know?”

“He takes it well. It gets frustrating, I’ve found out, but we work through it all.”

“So how many times have you visited him?” Aaron figured that Tristan would have gone to him growing up as well. He was a little put out that Spencer or Tristan hadn’t shared much with him about the man that would become a part of his life as well. Spencer was grown,but he could still see the friendship, the closeness there. He was never going to push him away from him, he wanted that friendship more than he wanted anything else. It would help fill in that hole in his heart nicely. He’d learn to like the man that Spencer was going to spend the rest of his life with, even if he had to keep his mouth shut about things that made him mad. He wasn’t going to lose Spencer. 

Aaron had spent thirty years without him and only ten years with him but he’d become such a big part of his life in those ten years that Aaron could suffer whatever he needed to keep him close.


	47. Summer 2010

Aaron was trying to raise Morgan when a call from him finally came through. He looked at the ID in shock for a second before he answered. He looked up at Spencer and nodded, letting him know that they finally got through.

“Morgan.”

“Sorry, Hotch, not Morgan,” Spencer said over the line. Aaron looked up again at his Spencer and found him standing there frowning at him. It wasn’t hard to figure out that a different Spencer was there with Morgan. “We have the UnSub in custody. Spicer, his sister, and daughter are fine. “

“Give us your address,” Aaron demanded. He’d made a deal with Spencer that he didn’t want to know when another him was going to show up on cases. It was better that way. Spencer rattled off where they were and Aaron wrote it down. He just looked at Spencer as he showed him the address. They were at the local station while the rest of the team was out and about with the rolling blackouts. “We will be there as soon as possible.” Aaron hung up the phone and looked at Spencer. “We need to get there as fast as possible.”

“Okay.” Spender grabbed his messenger bag and then they were off with two cars of locals behind them. Traffic problems with the blackouts made their path long and winding. Aaron though trusted that Spencer was getting them there. When they pulled up, Aaron laid a hand on Spencer’s thigh.

“Stay in the car.”

“Hotch?” Spencer asked. Aaron wasn’t used to being called Hotch by him. He wasn’t used to that word coming out of his mouth. “What’s wrong? You said that Morgan had the UnSub in custody.”

“He does. Him and you.”

“Oh. Uh, yeah. I’ll stay in the car.” Spencer pulled a book out of his messenger bag and then climbed into the backseat of the SUV. He laid down on his stomach on the seat, propping his book on the door and started to read. It was a book to do with physics. When he was sure that he was settled, Aaron got out of the car. Morgan and, who Aaron could tell was an older Spencer, came out of the house. Morgan had the UnSub while Spencer had a woman and a kid. Had to be Spicer’s sister and his daughter.

“Hotch,” Spencer said as the locals took the women from him, wrapping them in blankets and escorting them to cars. Spicer came out of the door next and he followed right behind them. Morgan let the locals take Flynn from them as well. “I appeared outside the house and I remember it from…” Spencer pointed at the SUV where the younger him was. “The curse of an eidetic memory. Makes it really great for cases. I know where I am as long as I pop into the past.”

“What did you hit him with?” Morgan asked. 

Spencer laughed and ducked his head. The team had learned that it was his almost ashamed reaction to anything. “A physics text that I’m working on helping revise.” Spencer dove in his messenger bag and handed it over to Morgan. The book was at least a thousand, if not two, pages long. Aaron held out his hand and Morgan passed it over. He started to flip through it, seeing Spencer’s writing in the margins as well as a whole bunch of text that had been marked out. He couldn’t understand a word of it but still he felt a swell of pride.

“So how old are you?” Morgan asked.

“Thirty five. I’m from two thousand and seventeen.”

“Wouldn’t that make you thirty six?”

“No, it’s spring, I’m still six months away from my birthday. I’ll help Spencer write a report for this.” The young man grabbed the book from Aaron and then started off to the SUV. He opened the back door and the younger Spencer sat up, making room for him. 

“How bad was it?”

“It was bad. He probably would have killed all four of us. I have never been so thankful as to see a member of this team. He was silent, more silent than I ever thought he could be.”

“He’s learned to be silent over the years. I looked at his file from the academy, he wasn’t the greatest at the physical stuff but he did well. Passing in everything. Hell, I didn’t know that he’s run since he was small. Don’t ask me how that has never come up. His marks in long distance running were almost better than yours.”

“What?”

“I had to sit and think but look at it this way, he had to be faster than those chasing him. As a kid he showed up naked in places, couple that with what he’s been exposed to from going to his own future, he’s going to make sure that he’s faster than anyone who will be chasing him or at least wily enough to get away from them. He can make himself downright small when he wants to fit into impossible places.”

“I don’t see a runner when I look at him.”

“I think it’s the clothes. He’s always cold here. Always. Even as a kid, he always went for long sleeves unless we were going swimming.”

“Him swimming, that I kind of need to see.”

“He’s good.”

“Did you teach him?” Morgan asked.

“Yes. God, he scared the crap out of me several times but he took too it quick for a desert kid.”

“How old was he?” Morgan pulled Aaron off to the side when the CSU team finally arrived and needed into the house. Aaron looked to the SUV to see the shadows of the two Spencer’s talking back and forth. With the way their hands were moving, they were not talking about the case. He watched as the younger Spencer leaned down, his whole body shaking. He was laughing. Aaron rubbed at his chest, an ache had set up there. 

“Four. Taught him how to ride a bike too. His father wasn’t that interested in showing him things like that. He wanted him to play t-ball and other truly physical sports.”

“Poor, Pretty Boy.”

“What?” Aaron asked turning to look away from the Spencers to look at Morgan. 

“You can’t tell me that…Hotch those hookers on the last case, they were not talking to him for his intelligence. I think that if they could have snuck off with him they would have. They wanted to spend the night with him. He’s lithe and his cheekbones. I’m straight but I can see what others would see in him. I know that you see him like a brother but Hotch man, he’s going to attract attention everywhere. Do you know anything about his sexual orientation?” Morgan sounded concerned and it was the only reason that Aaron was even thinking of answering. “Or anything about past partners?”

“He’s not talked to me about past partners but I know somethings about who he loves.”

“Loves? He’s taken?”

“Not yet. He hasn’t met his partner yet. He won’t tell me when or how many times he’s met him.”

“Him?” Morgan asked.

Aaron nodded. He hadn’t meant to let the gender pronoun slip in. 

“And you are okay with sharing him with someone else?” Morgan asked. 

“Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Hotch, you act the quintessential over protective brother with him. The last two cases where we’ve had to double up, you’ve roomed with him. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind sharing with Rossi but it’s always been you two. JJ and Blake, me and Prentiss. We knew that something would change when we got another guy on the team, I just figured that I would be rooming with Pretty Boy. We’ve not said a thing because we can see how much you care for him. You can’t tell me you aren’t going to resent it when Reid brings in his partner after meeting him. I know that you two hang out after work a lot. I don’t see you becoming a third wheel.”

“This is not the time or the place for this.” Aaron looked around the area they were at. There were locals swarming the area. Morgan nodded and moved over to where the Spicer family was while Aaron moved to the SUV. The rest of the team would be there as soon as possible and then this case would be behind them. He’d make sure that JJ knew to set the jet for either a late morning departure or an early afternoon. All of them needed sleep. 

Kurzbard came up to him. “Go get some sleep. We have the man in custody. You guys can do the rest of what you need tomorrow morning, whenever the hell you all wake up. I want to see Doctor Reid before he leaves. Thank him for saving the day.”

“Of course,” Aaron said and moved towards the SUV. He waved at Morgan at the same time he pulled his phone out to text the team to tell them all to meet at the hotel. Aaron climbed into the driver’s seat and waited for Morgan to get in before he drove off. The two Spencer’s were leaned over the text that older Spencer had cracked Flynn over the head with. He couldn’t understand a single word that the two younger men were saying, and the look on Morgan’s face the longer he listened to them told him that he didn’t either. The entire ride back to the hotel was filled with talk. Aaron was lulled into a sense of safety with it. The others were waiting outside when they pulled up. The Spencers flew past them with a wave, and then they were gone inside. 

“And how was that car ride?” Dave asked as his eyes never left the retreating forms of the two younger men. 

“Geek heaven. I pity Hotch. Kid's from twenty seventeen if anyone wants to know that. Took the UnSub out with a big assed physics book. Clocked him right on the head.” Morgan was all smiles. 

“Kurzbard told us to finish up in the morning. He’s got third shift taking care of everything. We need sleep so I wasn’t fighting him on any of it. JJ, have the pilot book us a late morning or early afternoon departure. That’ll give us enough time to pack things up and go.”

“Sounds good, Hotch.” 

Aaron pushed through the doors into the hotel. He didn’t have to wait long for the elevator. He wasn’t sure what he was going to find when he got to the room but to find only one Spencer sitting on the bed wasn’t it, until he heard the shower running. 

“He’s coming off a two week case in Texas in the middle of July. He was about to shower when he showed up here. He has no clue what time, as he wasn’t wearing a watch due to sweat,” his Spencer said as he slipped into the room. “We are going to share. We are pretty tired so we are going straight to sleep. After showers. You can go next if you want.”

“No, I’ll wait until you both are done.” Aaron started to ready his things. Spencer never took long showers on cases. By the time that he had his things ready for a shower, the Spencers were swapping. He kept his eyes away as Spencer moved around the room drying his hair before finally slipping a shirt on. 

“We need to talk,” Spencer said as he plopped onto Aaron’s bed. Forcing Aaron to look him in the eye. 

“Okay.” Aaron took a seat on the other side of the bed mimicking Spencer’s pose. 

“I don’t usually tell what happens but in this case, it’s better if I do. JJ’s turned down a placement at the State Department. She thought that would be the end of it but it’s going to come down from on high and she’s going to have two options, go where they want or quit. She needs to quit.”

“What?”

“Look, I’m on the other side of all of this and I’ve seen what happens to the person they got to get her in there. I like JJ and we become good friends but she’s not equipped for what they want. Hell, they get someone who is equipped and still it goes pear shaped. If she hands in her resignation, the FBI will finally go to bat for her and keep her here. I don’t know if I’ve told you this before or not. But we can’t lose her. Not because of something like this.”

“When?”

“Before the next case.” 

The shower shut off and Spencer moved back to his bed. He lay down on the far side and said nothing else. Aaron stood up with his change of clothes and shower kit as Spencer left the bathroom. Towel draped on his head but this one was fully dressed. 

By morning, the older Spencer was gone but still Aaron just stared at his Spencer. The young man was dead asleep. Almost all of the team slept like the dead the night after a case was over. It was the rest of knowing that one didn’t need to get up early to catch a bad guy. The jet ride was filled with the team doing all of their post case rituals to purge the case from their minds. Aaron was working on paperwork so that he wouldn't have to do much of it once he got back to the office. He wanted to get home so he could get the place cleaned up a little before he had Jack all weekend. Due to Haley having made plans when he went on the case, he wasn't going to get him until Saturday morning but that was fine with him. 

When he left for the night, Spencer was the only one left. Aaron wasn't shocked, he was sitting as his desk reading case files. Aaron had tried to get him to go home early before but the younger man never did. He had a set amount of older files he wanted to read each week and case depending, he didn't leave on Fridays until he was done. Aaron clasped him on the shoulder as he passed and waited for the wave at the doors. 

As Aaron got ready for bed his thoughts filled of Spencer. He thought about his plans for the next day and how it would have been a good day to invite Spencer along. The younger man though had yet to go on an outing on the times that Aaron had Jack. He would always push off and say that it was time for him and his son, not him, his son, and the tagalong. Aaron hadn't fought him on it yet. Spencer had met Jack as a kid but not as an adult and he wanted to fix that. 

The only times that Haley had ever woken Aaron up with a blow job could be counted on one hand and happened in the months that directly followed their marriage. So when he felt a hot, wet mouth on his cock, Aaron knew he had to be dreaming. He thrust up into the mouth and sighed in happiness. He'd had sexual dreams more in the recent years than he ever had before. Still, he wasn't going to say no. 

Hands ghosted up his thighs and curled before nails dragged down the skin of his stomach. He arched farther and the mouth on him pulled away. Aaron cried out, but then he felt the person who had been sucking him shift. The blanket on him moved with them and then he felt a tighter heat slip down his cock. He lifted his hands to pull the covers off of him and his bed partner but stopped when his partner started to move. 

Instead of pulling the blankets off, Aaron shifted his hands to slide them under the blanket. He felt knees and then thighs and then a tight stomach. The cock that brushed his fingers wasn't as big of a shock as it could have been. Aaron knew that he'd been dreaming of males for a while now. He remembered the closet in college and the classmate of his that he'd scared. He'd never figured out who the man had been but he really hadn't looked either. While being gay or bi wouldn't bat too much of an eye at the time, back then it would have. 

As his partner brought him closer and closer to orgasm, Aaron wanted to see who he was imagining. The body moved forward but instead of the blanket coming off, Aaron was enveloped in it. It was dark and he couldn't see but still his partner found his lips. Aaron tilted his hips up so that he could still thrust in and out of the man. Harsh breathing and the sound of slapping skin were the only sounds that he heard. He could smell their mixed sweat and the scent of sex. An arm around the waist and Aaron rolled them over, hearing the bark of laughter from the man he was fucking. Knees tucked up to his chest and Aaron moved inside him faster and faster. Lips sought out his again and the only thing that Aaron could do was brace one arm on the bed and bury the other in hair. He expected short hair but instead he found long hair. 

Mouth jerked away from his and Aaron heard harsh panting, the body below his was tensing up and Aaron waited, keeping the same pace in the same spot. 

"Aaron, please. Aaron." The voice was familiar so Aaron let go of the hair his hand was tangled in and reached up to pull the covers off them. A mess of brown hair was the first thing he saw and then familiar eyes. He tried to stop because if he stopped it wasn't true. Aaron felt shock as he stared into Spencer's eyes. 

Jerking awake, Aaron felt himself come. He sat up in bed and ran a hand down his face, trying to come to terms with his dream. It had felt so real, even though he'd known it wasn't. There had been a point in time in life, before his father's death, and the time just after, that he'd thought things like that. He thought about how he wanted Tristan in his life always. He'd put away those childish thoughts, but it seemed that it was still there in the back of his mind. 

Needing a shower, Aaron stood up, his release cooling in his sleep pants. He looked at the clock. It was over two hours before he'd have to get Jack. He threw his clothes into the hamper before stumbling into the shower. He was fucked and he knew it. Spencer was taken. No matter that he and his partner weren't together yet. 

Spencer had been talking about his partner to a victim a few cases back. Aaron hadn't been around for the start of it but he'd come in on it. When the victim had been settled and taken away by her mother, Spencer had turned and smiled at him. 

"So when are you finally going to meet this man?" Aaron had asked when they were finally alone.

Spencer's smile had turned even bigger and brighter and even now thinking of it made his heart swell and then start to hurt. "He's the only one I've ever loved and I don't mind waiting for him, Aaron. I know we are going to be together for a long time, so the wait is worth it."

Aaron hadn't known what to say to that so he'd gone back to the outer office of the police station. He's felt that sure once before and he'd lost it. His heart had hurt then and he'd thought it was over the loss of Haley but he knew the truth now. He thought about Morgan and his asking him how he was going to take Spencer being with the man he was going to settle down with. It felt like shit and Aaron hadn't even met him yet. 

Slamming his fist into the tile of his shower, Aaron thought about how he'd never had him to begin with. There wasn't a thing he could have done to keep him. Spencer had been meeting with his future partner at the same time he'd been meeting with Aaron. Aaron's heart felt raw as he rinsed off and then dried off. He looked at the time and he knew he needed to get going so he could get something to eat and coffee. 

Jack was so excited for a day at the zoo with Aaron. It was lovely weather for it. Aaron dressed in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Something that he didn't get to wear enough. When Jack had seen what he was wearing, he wanted to change into jeans and a t-shirt as well. Haley had laughed the entire time. Aaron's shirt was a pale green color and Jack had picked a dark purple shirt that had a red dragon on it. Jack's favorite place was the zoo so it was never an issue wanting to go there. At the zoo, Aaron's work didn't intrude. He kept his eyes out for people who would want to take Jack, but he did that all time. He didn't see death and destruction everywhere though. 

Aaron parked in the farthest spot from the gate. He picked Jack up and carried him on his shoulders as they got closer to the gate. Aaron had chosen the zoo because there was a new attraction that had opened last week. The Polar Landscape. It had polar bears, arctic foxes, a few new kinds of penguins, and a few other animals. It was really nice looking from the pictures that Aaron had seen in the paper and in the email the zoo sent out. For first thing on a saturday morning, it wasn't that busy yet and Aaron was thankful. It wasn't long before they were paying to go into the zoo behind a family of five. 

Just inside, was a stand where a jug of water could be bought and Aaron stepped up to it. He was behind another person and it wasn't until he heard him tell the worker thank you that Aaron recognized who it was. Spencer. 

Seeing him there brought back all kinds of memories of his dream. He felt himself start to harden and shifted to hide it as Spencer turned around. his eyes scanned everywhere before looking at Aaron. Those eyes widened in shock and Aaron couldn't help but smile back when the younger man smiled at him with a largest grin in the world. 

"Aaron," Spencer said.

"Spencer."

"Daddy, who is he?" Jack stage whispered in his ear. Spencer's smile turned different and Aaron wasn't sure what to think of it. 

"Jack this is Spencer Reid, he's new to my team. Spencer, this is Jack." Aaron couldn't help but smile when Jack held out his hand to be shaken by Spencer. One day, when Jack was older, Aaron would explain to him that Tristan and Spencer were the same. 

"But all of your team calls you Hotch. He called you Aaron. And you called him Spencer, not Reid."

Spencer cocked an eyebrow up at Aaron. Aaron could only smile. 

"Sometimes Jack, you are too smart for your own good. I've known Spencer since he was little. So, when we are not at work we call each other by our first names."

"Oh." Jack moved around a little and Aaron couldn't tell what he was doing but he tightened his hold on the boy's legs to make sure that he didn't fall. "Did you come alone?"

That explained the movement, he was looking around for someone else. 

"Yes, I did. I wanted to see the new exhibit. I love zoos and I didn't get to go to one as much as I would have liked as a kid so I go to all kinds of zoos now that I am an adult."

"That's cool. Do you want to go around with us?" Jack asked. Aaron sighed and was about to open his mouth to make sure that Spencer knew that he didn't need to. That it wasn't something he felt he needed to do. There was a look though on Spencer's face that seemed he was more than happy to go around with them. Jack started to wiggle and Aaron set him down on the ground. The boy grabbed Spencer's hand and moved over to towards the map of the zoo pulling him along. "Where do you start?" 

"I don't have a set way that I go. I always end at the aquarium though."

Jack gasped. "That's where we end as well!"

"Well then, do you want to see the new exhibit first or something else first?"

Aaron listened as the two of them plotted out exactly where they wanted to go from first to last. Jack grabbed for one of the paper maps but Spencer crouched down and put it back. 

"We don't need that. I have a memory that doesn't allow me to forget what I see. That means that I memorized this map after the first time I saw it. So if you want, I can lead us all around and not need a map."

Jack looked at Spencer like he was the next best thing and Aaron's heart contracted. He thought about how good a dad Spencer was going to be to his partner's child. 

"While you guys finish up the plans, I'm going to get some water for Jack and I."

Spencer nodded and Jack didn't even react. Aaron kept an eye on them though as he bought a large jug of water. It had a curved bit in the jug so that it could be carried easily with one finger or more. He made sure it was full of ice before leaving. Spencer had one as well and Aaron saw that he didn't have his messenger bag on him. There was a lump in his pocket. It took Aaron a few seconds to figure out that it was probably a camera. 

There was no way that he was going to tell Jack that Spencer couldn't go around with them so he'd have to make sure that he kept his reactions down. Spencer wasn't dressed any different than normal; slacks, button up, and a pair of purple Converse. Still, Aaron couldn't take his eyes off of him. He knew he was screwed. It was like that single dream had opened his eyes. He'd blinded himself so long ago. Spencer turned to him as he walked up with the water for him and Jack.

"Your dad is ready, Jack. Are you?" Spencer stood up and was shocked when Jack grabbed his hand and then reached out for Aaron's. Spencer let Jack lead the both of them to where they were going to start. 

By the time that they broke for lunch, they had visited half of what Jack wanted to see. There was no way they were going to get to see the whole zoo, but Jack never wanted to see it all in one go. Today they seemed to be hitting all the aquatic things. 

Jack spent nearly half an hour playing with a family of otters who swam back and forth while he was running to and fro in front of the glass. It was right after lunch so Aaron was more than willing to sit a little longer and let his food digest. Spencer took the seat next to him on the bench. They were closer than convention would say was normal, but not as close as they usually sat. Aaron wondered why and then he saw the woman staring at them. She was older and seemed to be there with her granddaughter. The granddaughter was on her phone and not really paying attention to anything going on around her. 

The feeling of weight around his shoulder pulled Aaron's attention from the woman and her granddaughter to Spencer who had leaned back, draping his left ankle over his right knee. He could have set his arm on the back of the bench but instead had placed it on Aaron. The smirk on his face told Aaron that he was doing it to upset the lady. A few seconds later, when Spencer didn't move and Aaron didn't shove his arm off, the lady was grabbing the granddaughter's arm and pulling her away. 

When they were gone from sight, Spencer started to laugh. 

"You are horrible," Aaron said with a laugh of his own. He kept waiting for Spencer to remove the arm but the younger man never did. "So, are you still liking the job?"

"Oh, yes. Some parts are better than others but a few things make up for the bad parts."

"Like what?" Aaron asked. 

"Seeing families reunited when we save the day. Listening to Morgan and Garcia doing whatever the hell you call what they do." 

Aaron laughed hard and leaned into Spencer more. It was a warm day but Aaron had to hold back shivers at being close to Spencer like this. The younger man curled his arm and his fingers started to brush up and down Aaron's arm maddeningly. 

"Working with you." The words were full of warmth and happiness and Aaron just hummed in response. He didn't want to say anything that would break the spell of the moment. The scent of Spencer was different than he remembered it. There was something more to it and he couldn't place it. He watched Jack as he tried to play what looked like patty cake with the otters for a few minutes before the boy turned to look at them. 

"I'm ready to move on," Jack said. 

Aaron stood up and held out a hand to help Spencer stand up. The younger man took the hand and when Aaron settled it on his elbow once they were up, he didn't pull away. Aaron celebrated inside. He'd take what he could get between now and when Spencer became unavailable. He tried to imagine the man that Spencer was going to spend the rest of his life with. Spencer's own words said that whoever it was stayed with him, so he was able to live with the job. When he tried to picture him though, all he could see was himself. Shaking his head to clear it, Aaron saw they were headed towards the new exhibit. There was a large glass tunnel with the two polars bear swimming above it. Jack wanted up on Aaron's shoulders so he had to let go of Spencer to be able to carry him. He couldn't reach the glass but he could see the bears a lot closer. 

The chatter between Jack and Spencer carried him through the rest of the exhibits that Jack wanted to see before they finally entered the aquarium. It was actually a giant building filled with so many different large tanks. There was one massive one that housed many types of fish, but there were smaller ones all around as well. The shark tank always kind of frightened Jack a little. He stayed in Aaron's arms when they stopped to look at it. The touch tank was the draw of the kids but Jack had never felt the need to go back to it after the first time he'd touched a lot of the creatures. 

Jack pulled on Spencer's arm until they got to the main room. He kept going until they stopped in front of the first section of the massive tank. Aaron stayed behind them, listening as Spencer named each fish that Jack pointed out. It was nice to have Spencer with him. They would have to make plans to go again to see the rest of the zoo with him along. He knew a lot more than the signs did about each of the creatures. When they moved down to the next section, Spencer sat down and Jack took the seat beside him. Aaron let his gaze wander around for a while and it wasn't until Jack gasped that Aaron looked back. It was a shark, a small one but still a shark and it had swum up to the glass. Jack was in Spencer's lap, a leg draped on either side of Spencer's legs. One of his arms was wrapped about Jack's stomach, making sure he couldn't fall, even though the distance of the fall would be nothing to him. 

Aaron thought about the son that Spencer was missing out on things with. How old was he going to be when Spencer finally found them? In the correct timeline? Aaron moved to crouch behind him. Jack was silent for a moment and it would be a good time to ask him when he was going to meet his would be son, but then he took in the look on Spencer's face. He was so happy at that moment. It had been a long time since that look had been seen on his face. The closer Tristan had gotten to ten, the more sullen he had gotten, between not being able to see Aaron as much and the impending leaving of his father. He didn't want to interrupt them and make that look go away. 

Jack leaned forward and the hand on his stomach stretched to allow him to wave his little fingers at the fish that had come up to the glass. Spencer ducked his head down and Aaron could have swore that he heard a hard intake of breath like he was almost smelling Jack. Then when Jack leaned back up, Spencer's head came up and Aaron saw something on his face that he had never seen outside of Tristan talking about his mother. He'd categorized it as pure love long ago. Aaron couldn't look at it fully anymore. He turned to the tank in front of him but kept an eye on Spencer from the corner of his eye and after Jack was fully settled, Spencer looked at him, the look no less full of love but also full of heat. 

Aaron's mind raced and he thought about it. Every single time that Aaron tried to press for more on his partner, Spencer clammed up. He'd admitted to visiting him but would never tell Aaron when or how many times he had. Every single little slip that Spencer had made to the team and even to him about the elusive partner fit Aaron, and a lot of other men. He couldn't ignore that look though. 

Spencer wasn't looking at him anymore so Aaron looked at him. Yes, Tristan had said that he loved big him and little him but the words of a child were overreaching. Spencer had shown up and saved Haley’s life. Tristan had shown up to help protect Jack. Time and again, they were there when Aaron needed them. 

It was him. Every single time that Spencer talked about the man he was going to be with, he'd been talking about him. He'd been so fucking stupid. So goddamned fucking stupid. Aaron wanted to rush over and kiss him. Wanted to do all kinds of things with him but they were in public. There was also the job to consider. Spencer wouldn't want to leave the team and there was no way that Aaron was going to. The younger man had never exactly told him about what the future partner did. He wasn't sure what he wanted now that he knew that he could take. 

The pair standing up distracted Aaron from his musings and he looked at Spencer and smiled at him. Spencer smiled and it was the same smile as always. The same one he'd always gotten. He felt so stupid. How could he ever think that Spencer would care that much about anyone else? When they sat down in front of the final bit of the tank, Aaron made sure to sit down next to Spencer. Jack still sat in Spencer's lap and Aaron was fully okay with that. This might have been the first time that they met with Spencer in the right timeline but he could already tell that Spencer loved Jack and that was perfect for him. He wrapped an arm around Spencer pulling him in close and let the happiness wash over him. 

They would figure it out. They had to. He'd let it all take it's course. He had Spencer here now, and for now that was enough. There wasn't some dark man in their future to steal him away. He was Aaron's and Aaron was his.


	48. October 2010

While Aaron hadn't had sex with a man, he'd looked it up. Therefore he wasn't surprised when his dreams turned more and more erotic. He was waking up having to change his bed clothes and sleeping pants more often than not. Impossible dreams of him and Spencer having sex anywhere and everywhere. His office, the round table room, the SUV while on a case. It was all well and good but he was getting more and more wild with the dreams. 

So, dreaming of Spencer sucking him off in bed was something that kind of shocked him. He could feel the familiar wet heat on his cock and reached down to grab at hair. It wasn't what he wanted but he would allow Spencer to suck him until he got close. He wanted lips. He wanted touching. 

The only reference that he had for what sex between two men was like was what he'd found on the Internet, he'd stayed away from commercial porn and had found homemade things, other things like it. Thankfully, Garcia had shown him how to wipe his browser history a long time ago. It made it better that the evidence of what he'd done wasn't on his computer. 

Spencer shifted and Aaron tried to pull him up but he fought the pull on his hair and then was near swallowing him. Hands held him down or he would have thrust up into the heat. Tightness around the head of his cock had him ever closer to orgasm. He knew that he had a good imagination but he'd never thought that he could imagine this much pleasure. A finger slid back between his cheeks and Aaron felt wetness on it. The finger didn't slide inside of him, just moved up and down his crack. The other hand was still holding him down but he wanted it. He wanted it to so bad. When the finger was over his hole, Aaron tried to push down on it. A chuckle from Spencer had Aaron seeing stars as he came, the vibrations on his cock too much. 

The swallowing of his release was too much. He tried to pull away but the hand slipped back to hold him down better. 

"It's okay, Aaron. Calm down. Aaron?" Spencer asked.

It wasn't fuzzy like a dream. The hands that were sliding up his body felt solid and real, Aaron wondered exactly how vivid his dreams were going to get. He could smell Spencer's shampoo. He wasn't going to open his eyes. If he opened his eyes then it was going to be over. The weight on him shifted and Aaron felt a hard cock along his thigh. Spencer's hands were rubbing on his chest, trying to help him settle. 

"Fuck," Spencer said in a tone that Aaron had never heard before and he opened his eyes. What he saw was not his Spencer. What he saw was a naked Spencer with shorter hair than his own and a tattoo on his chest. "You are not my Aaron."

"No." Aaron was shocked he was able to speak. It hadn't been a dream. He'd been given a blow job by an older Spencer. He looked at his face and tried to gauge exactly how old he was. The freak out about what exactly all of this meant could wait until Spencer was gone.

"How old is your Spencer?" Spencer wasn't getting up off the bed. He was naked and while his erection had fled a little, Aaron could tell that he was still at least half hard. Before Aaron could answer, Spencer looked around. He looked at the bedside that Aaron didn't have his things on and his eyes widened. The younger man scrambled backward off the bed and started to grab at clothes. Aaron could see the leather wrist band on his arm. Sleep pants and a t-shirt were thrown on before Spencer turned around to face him. 

"I..." Aaron rubbed a hand down his face. He wanted to reassure the Spencer that everything was fine but he couldn't. Was it considered cheating? What the hell was future him going to think? Hopefully he remembered exactly what night it had happened on and that he wouldn't get mad. "Spencer just turned twenty nine."

"So you aren't together yet?" Spencer asked, a little frightened.

"No, but I know that we will be. I kind of worked that out a few months ago, I've just been waiting for the right time." Aaron smiled and only then realized that he was still naked. He grabbed the blanket that Spencer must have pulled off him and threw it over his lower half. The genius moved towards the bed and sat down on the end of it. "Want to help me on what exactly the right time is?"

"You'll know it, I promise."

Aaron looked at him. Really looked at him. His eyes were haunted and there were such dark circles around them. Spencer always had circles around his eyes but this was a lot worse than normal. This wasn't in the middle of a case Spencer. This was a troubled Spencer. What exactly was happening in his time? Something caught his eye and he saw a cut on his throat. He moved forward on the bed and reached out to touch it. Spencer didn't back away and he allowed it. 

"What happened here?" Aaron asked. It wasn't a neat cut like one would see from a knife. It was like something had ripped at his skin. 

"We had a bad case. Kind of shook all of us to the core. I fell asleep on the couch because it's better. My Aaron is having nightmares. The case hit him hard, but I don't want to go into it too much."

"Why are you sleeping on the couch?" Aaron settled a hand on Spencer's knee, rubbing and trying to settle him. 

"He's having nightmares. This." Spencer waved at his throat. "Is from me touching him and him freaking out. His nail did it. He was so upset that he tried to sleep on the couch but it was making the nightmares worse so we swapped. I don't like to sleep alone in a bed so I wasn't getting any sleep. I tried the guest room but it failed too."

"What is he dreaming about?" Aaron could tell that Spencer was tired. That he was fading fast. He wondered if that was an effect of being here with him, a safe Aaron. 

"He won't talk about it. All I know is that it's something about a scratch, which he was saying before he gave me this and when he allows the dream to get far enough, he screams about 'Spence is down.' I don't know how to help him and I'm so tired. I took a nap today instead of eating lunch. I slept on the couch in Morgan's office."

"Can I see that tattoo?" Aaron asked, trying to distract him at least a little. He couldn't help, as it seemed the entire nightmare he was going through was based on a case that Aaron hadn't worked yet but he could try and help this Spencer. The younger man lifted up the shirt to show the tattoo to him. It was a simple design with their initials making a circle. He wondered when Spencer had gotten it and if he had a matching one but he didn't want to ask about it. "I'll be right back."

Aaron got up from the bed and moved to the bathroom to clean up a little and get dressed in at least sleep pants. When he exited the bathroom a few minute later, Spencer was lying down on the bed, curled into a ball dead center. He looked almost asleep. Aaron coaxed him into shifting to one side of the bed and then covered him up, slipping in behind him. Spencer tried to act like a board and stay stiff but as Aaron wrapped his arms around him and held him close, he relaxed more and more. 

"I'm not him and I'm not trying to be but you need sleep."

"I'm dead tired. It's the first time I've ever traveled and didn't know it. I thought I was back at home. You were in bed jerking off and I hoped that intimacy would help. That he could see that I was fine and that it was all good. But it wasn't him, it was you."

"Shush," Aaron said as he pulled the covers up a little higher. Spencer huffed a little so Aaron released him. He was shocked when the younger man rolled him over and pressed his back into the bed before cuddling up to his side. He draped his arm across Aaron's chest and then laid his head on his shoulder. He exhaled and all the tension in his body was gone. Aaron waited until he was sure that Spencer was asleep before he allowed himself to sleep. 

It felt weird waking up alone in bed. He rolled onto his stomach into the spot where Spencer had been and inhaled. The man's scent was on the pillow and he knew it would be on him as well. He settled down and sighed. He knew he needed to get up. His alarm hadn't gone off yet but he knew there was a chance for a case in Detroit, if the city could decide to invite them in or not. It was also very near Halloween and he knew that Jack had picked out Spider-Man as his costume. He was looking forward to going out trick or treating with Haley and Jack. 

As he got ready for work, he thought about Spencer and hoped that the older him was able to break through whatever hang up that Aaron was having. He wanted them to work it out, for their own sake. For Aaron to not be talking about it meant it had to be horrible. He talked to Spencer and Tristan about everything. He was sure that by that point in time Spencer knew everything that he'd faced with Haley. The words that Spencer spoke kept going through his head. 'Spence is down' could only mean that in the nightmare he saw Spencer die. Just that thought had his heart aching. He couldn't imagine a future without Spencer in it. To be alone. 

Looking forward to going into work, Aaron wanted to see his Spencer. To see happy, unhaunted eyes. He'd never gotten the actual age of that Spencer out of him but he didn't look too much older. He figured five years at max. 

The bullpen was filled with various people when Aaron got there but there was no Spencer. He was a little disappointed. JJ handed him the paperwork for the case in Detroit. The team had been called in. 

Chatter in the bullpen went up and Aaron looked out to see Spencer coming in with Prentiss and Blake, a monster mask on his head. Aaron had to hold in the laugh but he couldn't control the smile on his face. JJ looked at him and then followed his gaze, smiling as she saw him. 

"He's made you happier, Hotch. I've never seen you this happy."

"I've not been this happy in a while," Aaron admitted. JJ patted his shoulder and then moved to call the team into the round table room. He wasn't shocked when Spencer described Devil's Night to the whole team. He remembered most of it from when Tristan had talked about it when they were younger. The whole team was shocked by exactly how much Spencer liked Halloween. 

Aaron was able to keep himself professional, or at least as professional as he always was when it came to Spencer, up until they were on the jet home. Spencer fell asleep with a book propped on his lap. Blake had laughed when she took the book from his hands and set it inside his messenger bag. Aaron hadn't been able to stop looking at him. He knew that he'd been allowing his fears to guide him the past few months. Ever since the zoo, he'd pulled back some from Spencer. he'd been so happy that day. Then, the thought that he didn't have a choice in the matter popped into his head and he tried to fight it. The thought that his future was already mapped out had scared him. That nothing he did could change it. 

The thing was though, that he wasn't happy, and he knew it. Denying what he wanted wasn't making him happy and it was hurting Spencer. There were a lot of things that he needed to figure out. He needed to talk to Strauss to see exactly what the terms of Spencer being on the team were. The ADD had told him that when he was ready he needed only ask her and the file would be given to him. He resolved that he would look at the file and then see about asking Spencer out on a date. 

Letting his mind go there, he thought back to his abrupt wake up call with the older Spencer. It had felt wonderful and he was happy that it hadn't gone any farther, that he hadn't stayed asleep through more. He wasn't sure exactly what Spencer had been planning but he wanted to be awake for their first full time together. Words that Spencer had said came back to him. That his partner was the only man he loved. There was something that Aaron found thrilling about the thought that Spencer was probably a virgin. Haley and him had both been their first time. That had gone better than he expected. The thought of being Spencer's first and Spencer being the first guy he was with was intoxicating. He felt himself start to harden and shifted the file from the table into his lap. 

Aaron pulled himself from those thoughts as quickly as they started. He needed to not get a hard on while on the jet. Discretely, he looked around to see if anyone had been looking and was happy when they hadn't been. Grabbing his cell phone, he texted Haley. Now that his mind was made up, he needed to talk to her. He was going to be introducing someone new into Jack's life in a more than friends capacity and he felt that he needed to tell her this. First Strauss, then Haley and then Jack. He had his plans. It wasn't long before Haley texted back that he was more than welcome to come over for dinner. He told her thanks and then set his phone aside to focus on the paperwork he needed to get done before he could slip away to meet her for dinner. 

Strauss was in her office when the team arrived back at Quantico. He'd already finished most of his work that had to complete before the end of the day, he'd even brought up to Strauss what he needed to. 

"Agent Hotchner, what can I do for you?"

"ADD Michaels told me that when I was ready, I could look at the file for the full terms of Reid being on the team. I would like to do that."

"Of course." StrauSs stood up from the desk and moved over to the wall safe that she had. It was open but given that it was a work day, Aaron wasn't shocked. He watched as she pulled out a manila envelope. The security level on the front astounded him. He looked and saw that there were only two exceptions and they were himself and Spencer. He looked at Strauss.

"You are not included in that?"

"There is only a single clause of his hiring that I am not privy to. I was told that it was deeply personal and wouldn't affect his job so I am going on that for now. That is your copy. Burn after you read, give it back to me, or hide it in your office, I don't care. It's not allowed to leave the building though."

"Thank you, Ma'am." Aaron stood up with the folder in hand and left the office. He believed her that she felt it was personal and didn't affect the team, but how did she feel that he would have access to it and she didn’t? When he got to his office, he closed the blinds and shut the door. Everyone would knock with the blinds and door shut so he wasn't worried about locking it. Instead he sat down on his couch and opened the folder. The seal was easy to break and he pulled out the first set of paper. It looked like a standard contract but there were several addendums on it. How to handle absences and other things related to his travel. The exact protocols that he followed when he did disappear. How to go about giving them a heads up when he was gone for long periods. When he went to the past, it was easy but when he went to the future there was no way. There were a few instances several years in the future written down on the margins of the paper, he recognized Spencer's scrawl. 

There was a sheet of paper that was written by the Director of the FBI allowing him to quit for any reason at any point in time and not have to give a reason. Aaron wondered about that one. On the back of it was a sentence written in green ink that told him it hadn't been photocopied. _There are papers like this in all the files of the travelers who work for the Bureau._ That told Aaron there were more than just Spencer. He'd always wondered. The research that Spencer spoke of told him that there were more travelers in and about the world, but he was shocked that so many were open, and that it seemed several worked with the government. He settled down with the final sheet of paper in the envelope. It was folded in half, and there was another handwritten note. _I need you to be sure before you open this and look at it, Aaron. While you don't have a memory like mine, you can't unsee this once you see it._ This had to be the personal thing. The thing that Strauss wasn't able to look at. 

The lawyer in him knew what he was seeing. It was a contract. Between Spencer and the FBI with a spot for Aaron to sign. The top of document was where Spencer had signed and it spoke of careful wording. The bottom where there was a spot for Aaron to sign was plainer. It was a contract between Spencer and the FBI giving them the right to a relationship of a sexual nature. Of the ability to move in together. The bottom was for when he and Spencer did start something, his agreement in the terms. There was a post-it telling him that he was ready for that he just needed to go see Michaels to sign the original. 

The visit to the ADD was quick, as he was in between meetings, but Aaron signed it and Michaels' secretary signed as witness. He was in and out in five minutes, left with nothing left to keep him at work. He’d done all his paperwork. He found he just wanted to get to the apartment and change before having dinner with Haley, then taking Jack out trick or treating. It was Halloween and he was looking forward to Jack in his Spider-Man costume. 

Pulling up outside of the house, Aaron thought about that day, when he'd figured out who Spencer was. Haley had debated long and hard about moving but Jack hadn't wanted to and after speaking with a therapist and seeing that Jack was doing fine in the house, it was decided that they would stay. He sat in the car and looked at the house. He saw Haley pull back the curtain and watch him for a moment before she closed it. A minute later the door opened and she was coming towards him. He waved her into the passenger seat of the car.

"You look like the weight of the world is on your shoulders."

"I can never regret what we had together, Haley. It gave us Jack."

"I wondered when we were going to have this conversation. You've been pensive the past few months and yet happier at the same time. So...name?"

"Spencer." Aaron laughed as he said the name. He wasn't shocked. She could read him well. "His name is Spencer."

"Jack adores him. Every time the zoo is brought up, he starts to talk about him. I wondered. Jack said that you hadn't made plans to meet him but you spent the day with him and Jack regardless."

"He does make me happy. I think...no. I know that I love him."

Haley looked at him. Her eyes searching his face. Whatever she was looking for she had to have found it. "Tristan."

"That's what he called himself when I met him when we were younger. It's his middle name. He liked it better back then." Aaron didn't like lying to her but he couldn't betray Spencer like that. He needed his permission to tell her. "He's also the newest member of my team."

The silence was a shock and Aaron looked at her expecting to see anger. All he saw was acceptance. 

"He'll understand the job and the hours better than I ever could. What about if it's found out? Isn't there a risk of losing your job?" Haley asked. 

"It's worth it." Aaron looked away from her as he said it. He didn't want to see the hurt in her eyes. He wouldn't leave the BAU to make her happy but he was more than willing to lost his job over Spencer. While she didn't need to know that there was no risk, he needed her to understand what this meant to him. What Spencer meant. 

"I thought that was what you were going to say. You don't do things by half. If he wasn't worth it, you would never start something with him. I just didn't expect it to hurt this much. I always worried. You only talked about things you didn't really care about. Your parents, Sean, Tristan, they always were sore subjects. I'm glad you found him again and I want to meet him, when it's time. When it's appropriate."

"Do you remember that wedding gift that we never figured out who it was from? The ties, books, that purse you still love so much?" Aaron turned fully in the car seat to face her, unbuckling his belt. 

"Yes. I can't remember the initials."

"STR. Spencer Tristan Reid.”

“Oh…He…why didn’t you see him there?”

“He dropped off the gift during pictures and then left.”

“We should probably get inside to Jack,” Haley said as she pointed. Jack was standing in the window, the curtain at his back. He had a frown on his face. Aaron smiled and got out of the car, when Haley did so as well, he pressed the lock button. Haley went into the house first and Jack was right there. Looking sad. “What’s wrong?”

“I didn’t do anything wrong so that means that you two wanted to fight where I couldn’t hear.”

“No, sweetie,” Haley said. She crouched down and Aaron followed, pulling his face to meet his eyes. “No, we just wanted to have a grownup talk.”

“I was talking to mommy about Spencer, Jack.”

“What about Spencer?”

“About how he’s going to be hanging out with me more and that means you as well. I have to tell mommy everyone who is going to be around you. Like when Aunt Jessica started to date Fred. Remember, she brought Fred around so you could meet him?” Aaron asked. 

“But Aunt Jessica didn’t stay with Fred.”

“No, she didn’t.”

“And I don’t see Fred anymore. What’s going to happen if you and Spencer don’t want to be friends anymore? Who will go to the zoo with me?” Jack asked. Aaron tried to keep a straight face and he heard Haley muffling a snort behind him. 

“Well, Jack. I am sure that Spencer will still go with you to the zoo even if he and I are no longer friends. He really liked going to the zoo with you.”

“Are you sure?” Jack asked. 

“Yes.” 

Jack smiled and nodded before going back into the living room where he had been sitting before with books spread out. They were all about fish. All the fish that had been in the tank in the zoo.

“We might want to discuss upping the amount of money that we have set aside for books for him,” Haley said as she motioned him in towards the kitchen. There was the smell of roast in the air. That was one meal that he missed of hers. He’d tried to make it and never got it right. “His visit to the zoo has upped his want of science books. Also, he wants a pet otter for Christmas.”

“An otter?” Aaron asked. He remembered Jack playing with the otters at the zoo. He wasn’t shocked at all. “That’s a feat there. We can sit down and talk with him about that later tonight, if you want.”

“He said that Spencer sat with him and told him all about the fish in the tanks at the zoo and about all the animals that they saw.” Haley opened the lid on the roaster in the oven and stuck a fork in one of the carrots. Even Aaron could tell that it was still a little harder than they liked. 

“Spencer is unique.”

“The way that Jack was talking I figure that he’s a genius of some kind. Some of the words that Jack was saying after were very high level, even for an adult.”

“Three PhDs working on a fourth in his spare time and I think it was five BAs. I am not quite sure on that number. High IQ.”

“I can’t fault that he’ll be a good role model on Jack. Like I said, Aaron, have him around. It doesn’t have to be a long meeting, just a simple hi how are you and bye. Maybe one of the nights you are picking up Jack.”

“I think that I can swing that,” Aaron said, happy that Haley wasn’t that upset. He was actually looking forward to introducing them. He thought that they might be able to get along, if for nothing else than their shared love of books. 

"So Jack, why don’t you go grab your costume so you can show daddy your new one?" Haley asked. Jack smiled and took off running. Aaron looked up at his ex-wife and cocked an eyebrow. She smiled and held out a hand for him to wait. Ten minutes later, Jack came back in. Dressed in a suit with a crooked tie. 

"Spider-Man was itchy." 

Aaron crouched at Jack's side and straightened the little tie. Jack smiled at him and Aaron knew that no matter what, he and Haley were doing well by Jack.


	49. December 2010

Aaron knew that he slept lightly. Even lighter when Jack was in the apartment. So, when he rolled over at 6am knowing that something had woken him up, he just listened, his hand reaching for the gun in the safe at his bedside. When the bedroom door opened and Spencer stalked into the room and went right for his closet, Aaron relaxed but only slightly. Jumping minutely, Aaron felt something hit him. He opened his eyes and looked down at the pair of jeans. Next, a long sleeved polo came flying out. Spencer left the closet and moved to his dresser pulling out a pair of matching socks with a look of disdain on his face and then underwear. He turned and threw them onto the bed on top of the rest of the clothes. 

“Well, don’t just gawk at me. Get dressed!” Spencer hissed at him before leaving the room. Aaron watched him leave and knew from the haircut that this wasn’t his Spencer. He got out of bed and stripped out of his sleep pants and t-shirt and changed into the clothes that Spencer had thrown at him. He wondered what was going on. The plan had been to shower that morning but he had a feeling that he’d get yelled at for that. So he promised himself he’d shower that night. He did brush his teeth though and moved towards the main part of the apartment. There, he found Spencer watching the TV. The sound was on mute so Aaron couldn’t hear anything. He made noise as he walked so that Spencer would hear him. The genius’s eyes were on the TV, but he was blocking it and Aaron couldn’t see what was happening on it.

When Aaron got close enough to see, Spencer turned. He held up his hand for silence. Text was scrolling across the bottom on the screen, but Aaron wasn’t paying attention to that, he was looking at Spencer’s body language. He was standing and acting like this was a case. Like he needed to move at a moment’s notice. 

“I know the team is on a case and that you have Jack this week. I know it’s about two weeks to Christmas. I’ll stay here with him. I look close enough to your Spencer that it doesn’t freak him out. You need to get to that bank. The FBI agent who is on site is going to cock it up. You’ll get there in time to stop it from going even worse.” 

“How do I explain me going…?” Aaron stopped when he saw the bank being held up. It was his bank. He’d banked there for years. It opened at 6 am to get those who needed to do things before work. It was part of the reason why Aaron had chosen it for his banking when he’d turned eighteen. “Do you have your cell on you?” 

“No. It wouldn’t matter anyway. I’ve upgraded recently and I don’t think it’ll work here. Call the phone here. If it’s your number, I’ll answer. If you can’t use your cell, call once, let it ring three times, hang up. When you call back again, I’ll answer.” Spencer’s eyes were back on the TV and Aaron could see exactly how upset he was. 

“You know what happens?” Aaron knew the answer but it wasn’t confirmation from him. He wanted to be sure that Spencer could help him deal with the fallout.

“Yes.” The answer was choked out. Whatever was going to happen was going to be horrible. The genius wasn’t looking him in the eye. 

“And you won’t tell me?” Aaron stepped closer to him to try and pull him into a hug but he stepped away. He could count the number of times in a private setting where Spencer stepped away from his touch. 

“No.” 

“Why?” 

“Because you can’t change what’s going to happen before you get there. And you don’t need that having you make a run to get there.” Tears were forming in Spencer’s eyes. 

“Spencer?” Aaron asked. 

Eyes tracked to the clock and then back to Aaron. “You need to go, Aaron. Please just be safe on the way.” The look on Spencer’s face said that he wanted to say something else but stopped himself. Aaron grabbed his keys, wallet, and credentials. It took only a minute to slip his gun on. He held up his backup and when the younger man shook his head no, Aaron left it off. He looked at Spencer and could see that he was utterly upset, staring at the TV so he moved behind him and pulled him into a backwards hug and kissed the top of his head. 

“I’ll come back to you, I promise.” 

“I know. You aren’t going to come back the same though.”

“But as long as I always come back, we’ll be fine.” Aaron squeezed him one last time. “I’m sure that you can come up with something better for Jack to know than I went to deal with a hostage situation at a bank.”

“I will. Go.”

Aaron moved out of his apartment and down his car. He wasn’t ready to deal with this. Not alone. He was going into unknown territory just because a future Spencer said that he needed to. He needed to come up with a reason to take over by the time that he got to the bank.

Slipping through the perimeter was easy. He stayed at the back and watched. Then the sound of a shot ringing out from the bank had him on edge. The HRT leader, Banner, moved up to who Aaron was sure was the lead agent on hand. He didn’t recognize him. 

“Why are I and my team even here if you are not going to listen to me?” Banner asked. The agent in charge just glared at him and Aaron started forward. The movement drew Banner’s gaze to him. 

“Agent Hotchner, please tell me the BAU is here to take this over?” Banner asked. 

“I’ve not been given approval. I was on my way here for banking when I saw the barricades.”

“Call your section chief, I’d rather deal with you if I am going to be dealing with anyone.” Banner looked at the other agent and Aaron pulled his phone. He dialed straight to Strauss’ cell phone.

“Agent Hotchner, I’ve been made aware that you are on the scene at the bank. What is going on?”

“One suspected loss of life so far. We have not been able to confirm. The agent in charge is not listening to HRT.”

“Well that won’t do. Take over, and I’ll have the someone call the former agent in charge. Find out the dead. Garcia is helping your team with their case but I’m sure she can help you.”

“Yes, Ma’am.” Aaron looked at Banner and nodded as he dialed Garcia.

“Sir, I thought that you were hanging with little Hotch.”

“I’m on the scene of a bank robbery, Garcia. I need eyes into the bank and that feed transferred here. I also have a suspected dead inside the bank. Can you try and get me a name?”

“Of course, Sir. I’ll call you back as soon as I have anything.”

Aaron moved to the agent in charge. “You are pulled from this. I’ll keep your team on hand as I don’t have mine. They are on another case. If you will listen to me, you can stay, if not, leave.” Banner stepped up to him and handed over a tablet that had a feed on it.

“We were able to get footage up to before the bank was breached. We have a suspected thirteen customers and fifteen workers. The armored truck has already done a pick up, yesterday. There have been few demands. A chopper and that if we tried to breach the bank, they would kill everyone. Stephens wanted to try and get a camera inside and I vetoed that until we had the plans for the bank in hand. He chose to ignore that and now the camera was found and someone is probably dead.”

“I have someone trying to hack the feed and see if we can get some eyes turned back on in there,” Aaron said. 

“We have movement.”

Aaron felt his phone vibrate and he looked to see it was Garcia. He watched the door as an old man stepped up to it from inside the bank. He was carrying someone. 

“Garcia?” Aaron asked but instead of a bubbly voice, all he heard was crying. It sounded like she was trying to talk but he couldn’t understand a single word. The man turned to hand off the person he was carrying to a member of HRT. Next he handed over a purse and Aaron’s phone fell. He knew that purse. He was running towards where the person was being set down on a gurney. 

Banner stopped him when he was five feet away. “Hotch, calm down. She didn’t feel a thing.”

“Let me go, Banner. That’s my ex-wife.” Aaron pushed past him and touched Haley’s face. Her eyes were closed and Aaron knew that she was dead. He could feel someone moving behind him. He wanted to scream and cry but he couldn’t. Not here. Not with all the eyes watching. He closed his eyes and leaned over her, not caring if her blood got all over him. He kissed her forehead as he saw the coroner come closer. He now knew why Spencer was so upset. He knew. He knew that she would die. He wanted to hate him but she’d been marked as dead before he had even gotten to the scene. There was no way he could have saved her. 

“Hotch, here’s your phone,” Banner said as he pulled him back from the gurney. Aaron took the phone and saw that he was still connected to Garcia. 

“Garcia, I need eyes on that bank. Do not tell the team anything. I need their minds on their case.”

“Yes, Sir. I am almost in. They are good but I am better.”

“As you should be.” Aaron looked one last time at Haley and then turned to Banner. “I want SWAT on the exterior but not for a breach. I don’t think that we are going to get to do a breach. I want eyes on every single angle. The next time they call, I want to talk to them.”

Three hours later, Aaron gave the order. Between Garcia’s feed from inside and the view of the bank through the windows coupled with what the older man gave them on how many UnSubs were inside, they knew that there was four of them. Snipers were ready to take out the three that were accessible and two teams were ready to swarm just after the shots were fired. The fourth UnSub was in the basement, working on trying to crack the safe. As soon as the shots were fired and the first SWAT team confirmed that the three were dead, the second team breached as well and when the fourth UnSub came up, he was facing ten guns. He gave up quickly. 

“Aaron,” a female voice called out and he turned to see Strauss there. He really didn’t want to talk to her. He needed to called Jessica and he needed to get home to Jack. “Garcia called me and told me everything. All I need from you is a report from when you stepped across the barricade to now and you can go home. The second you leave the office you are on two weeks downtime with more allowed as needed. Where is Jack?”

“Jack is at home with a neighbor. I texted and said that I was held up and would be really late in getting back.”

“In my eyes this is a win. HRT and SWAT are praising you. Nothing bad it going to come of this. You acted with honor and respect when most would have been crying on the floor. Go be with your son.” Strauss looked around. “I’ll handle this.”

“Thank you, Ma’am.” 

Aaron pushed the thoughts swirling in his head away. He hadn’t talked to Spencer and he didn’t think that he wanted to call until he was done. If he heard Jack, he’d probably break down and that wasn’t going to do them any good with him in DC proper. 

When he arrived back at his apartment hours later, he could barely remember his time at the office. The only bright spot had been Garcia hugging him. Telling him that she’d keep the team in the dark until he said otherwise. He’d told her that as soon as their case was wrapped would be fine. 

“Okay, Sir but I need you to understand that Reid is already circling. He knows that something is wrong. He’s trying to use his mind powers for evil. He almost had me spilling the secret but then my computer beeped and I hung up on him.”

Aaron had wanted to laugh at that. He figured that he knew exactly how troublesome Spencer was being. Letting himself into the apartment, Aaron was greeted with the sight of Jack asleep on the couch with Spencer at the opposite end. Jack’s feet were in his lap. The younger man had a book in one hand and the other was rubbing at one of Jack’s feet. There was something undeniably domestic about it and it just broke down the last of Aaron’s defenses. All the tears he’d been holding in all day broke free. He moved with heavy feet towards the kitchen. Needing a drink. He found a bottle of his favorite bourbon and a glass beside it. The sound of soft feet on carpet drew his gaze and he saw Spencer leaning there against the doorway. Aaron looked him up and down and saw that he wasn’t looking the greatest. Then the cut drew his gaze. This was the same Spencer from months before. The cut looked mostly healed. 

“How long has he been asleep?”

“Fifteen minutes give or take. He’s easier to deal with the younger he is. And no he didn’t ask a question about me looking different. I told him that something came up at work and you needed to go in and do some filing work and since he was still asleep, you opted to let him sleep. He only asked about what would happen if you and I weren’t friends anymore. If I would still take him to the zoo. I told him yes and it seemed to make him happy.”

“I was talking to him about the fact that you are going to be around more and that you and I were going to be more than friends. He was only worried about losing his new friend.”

“I’m sorry, but I saw no outcome where telling you what you were walking into was going to help. She would still be dead and you’d have a massive guilt complex. You saved the others’ lives.”

“Distract me from this. Distract me with words. How is your Aaron doing? The bags under your eyes look better.”

“He got a very rude awakening the other morning. He was in the middle of a nightmare and scared the shit out of a young Tristan.”

Aaron remembered the Tristan that had run from him. Had he just been to see that Aaron on his trip before? God, that had to be what happened Aaron thought as he looked at Spencer.

“And?”

“He’s talking finally. He’s afraid that he’ll scare Jack like that.” Spencer looked off to the side and his body shivered. Aaron stepped up to him. While things sounded better he knew that things between the two of them weren’t perfect yet in the future. “I’m getting ready to leave. I can feel it coming.”

Aaron reached out and cupped the side of Spencer’s face. He watched as eyes widened and a weird look came over Spencer’s face. 

“I love you, Spencer. Big and little you.”

Spencer laughed and his eyes lit up. “I love you, Aaron. Big and little you.” Aaron stared at his face until he was gone. Draining two fingers of scotch, Aaron moved to the couch and sat down, taking up Spencer’s spot. He looked around and saw a notebook down on the coffee table. He leaned forward to pick it up and looked at it. It was the name of a doctor that Aaron recognized as one of the ones that the FBI used in local cases. There was a list of books, for both him and Jack, about dealing with loss. He didn't know what he was going to do. He needed to call Jessica so that she could come over. He looked around and decided to text her to come over as soon as possible, he needed to talk to her. That was when he noticed the flashing light on his answering machine

Settling Jack's feet back on the couch, Aaron moved over and hit the play button.

" _Aaron, I don't know where you are but I hope that you and Jack are having fun. Please, if he's listening, hit stop. I'm in the bank and it's a holdup and I don't think that I am going to make it out. Whoever is negotiating with them is really bad at it. I just wanted to say goodbye. If I make it out, we can laugh about how dramatic this is. But if I don't. Make sure Jack has a good life. Show him that you used to smile, long ago, before everything. Keep Spencer close and don't let him go. I didn't get to meet him due to cases but he makes you happier than I have ever seen you and Jack's already in love with him. He'll be a good father to Jack and a good lover to you. Jack, I love you. I am sad that I won't get to see you grow up and be a wonderful man, just like your father but know that mommy loves you._ " The sound of a scuffle was next and then the firing of a gun. Aaron flinched and hit stop. He'd have Garcia edit out the end before putting it on a disc for Jack to listen to. 

Looking at the clock, Aaron figured he had a few minutes before Jack woke up so he went to his bedroom, shutting the door most of the way. He moved to his ensuite and looked at himself in the mirror. His eyes were bloodshot and his hands were shaking. He ran water and splashed it on his face. He needed to hold on until Jessica was there. He was afraid if he gave into his grief that it would cripple him and he needed to be strong for Jack. Haley's purse with cell phone was in the backseat of his car. He wanted to get the pictures off the phone. Haley had shown him several pictures that she had taken with Jack lately. There was so much that he would have to do. While they may have been divorced, they'd promised each other that they would take care of their final things if Jack was still alive. He knew that Jessica would want to help and he wouldn't deny her that right.

The sound of a soft knock on the door drew his attention from the mirror. It wasn't Jessica, the knock was different than her normal. He took a towel to his face to wipe away the water before he went to answer the door. He hoped it was Strauss. Sparing a second to look at Jack, he saw his son moving about on the couch, he was near ready to wake up. Aaron unlocked the door and opened it to find Spencer standing there. 

"Aaron, what's wrong? You've not answered a single message from me. You look like shit so don't try and tell me that nothing is wrong." Spencer moved to push past him into the apartment but he stopped when he saw Jack asleep on the couch. "Aaron?"

"Jack's down for a nap. I've been handling the hostage situation at the bank today."

"That's your bank wasn't it? I heard other than the robbers, there was only a single civilian casualty. What happened?"

"The lead agent in charge wouldn't listen to HRT. The civilian was dead since before I arrived on scene."

"Who stayed with Jack?"

"A future you. He's the one who sent me to the bank. He knew the outcome of today."

"It's not like you to blame yourself for a death that's not on your watch." Spencer  
stepped closer to him and Aaron shut the door. He pulled Spencer into the kitchen where the bottle of bourbon was still out. He looked at it and then back at Jack before he put it up. He'd had his glass. 

"The horrible thing is that as much as I am so mad at the death, I know that for future you it has to be harder."

"Future me? Aaron, what's going on?"

"Before we had an ID I knew exactly who it was. I knew it because of that damn purse you got her. She's been using it since she found out that it was you."

"Haley?" Spencer asked and he turned to look at Jack. "Does he know?"

"No. He's been asleep since I got back. I am assuming that your case is over?"

"Yes."

"Stay? I can't do this alone. I don't want to do this alone. I've got to tell Jack that his mother is dead. That while he was here, playing with you, her body was cooling at the morgue."

"Did I leave anything? Notes?"

"There is a notepad in the living room."

Aaron watched as Spencer moved in and picked up the pad. He stopped before coming back into the kitchen and just stared at Jack. He could see the pain in his eyes and Aaron knew that future Spencer, the one who just went home was going to need help. He hoped that Aaron had his head out of his ass enough to help him. Spencer had been the one to save her from Foyet only to have her die by the hands of idiots who wanted quick money. Jack had lost his mother for senseless violence. Yet he'd had over another year with her. If it hadn't been for Spencer, she would have died a year before but Jack needed more time with her. He needed his mother to see him graduate high school and college. To see him get married, to help with her grandkids. Aaron stopped at that. Cadance. The name of his granddaughter. He knew that and Haley never would. 

The tears started and Aaron couldn't stop them. He moved backwards until he felt something solid behind him and dropped to his ass. He tucked his knees up and hid his face in them. He heard the clatter of the pad and then Spencer's hands were on him. Aaron grabbed him and held on. He held tight as he let all of his emotions out. While he wasn't in love with her anymore, she held a place in his heart as Jack's mother and as a good friend. He shifted and Spencer kissed his head. 

"Shush, Aaron. Just let it all out." Spencer held him tight and Aaron felt safe. It was just like at his father's funeral. He felt safe in his arms. 

"Daddy?" Jack's voice called out from right beside them. Spencer didn't let him go fully, just enough to where he could look at his son. "Daddy, what's wrong?"

"Oh, buddy." Aaron pulled Jack into his arms and Jack curled into the shelter of the two bodies. "You know how I had to go into work today and Spencer watched you? Well I did go into work. There was a bank holdup and I was the best to take care of it."

"Did someone die?" Jack asked. 

"Why do you ask that?" Spencer asked.

"Daddy's crying and you were looking up books on death. You bought a few when you thought I wasn't watching."

"Jack, before I got to the scene one of the bad guys killed someone there. When I got there I took over and made sure that everyone else got home okay."

"That's sad." Jack pulled back to look at him. Aaron couldn't do it. He couldn't say the words that were going to crush his son. He choked on a sob and then buried his head in Jack's chest, pulling him back to him. The sound of the front door shutting had Spencer moving away from them but Aaron trusted him that if it was someone bad, that he'd take care of him. His gun was still on his hip. 

"Why is Haley's purse in Aaron's car? Aaron what's wrong?" Jessica's voice carried. "And who are you?"

"Spencer Reid."

"Oh, Aaron's...what's wrong?" Jessica was crouching at his side, he felt her hands on him and he started to cry again. 

"There was a hostage situation at a bank downtown today. Aaron went to cover it while I watched Jack. I consulted with the team on the case they are on. A hostage was killed just as Aaron was arriving on scene."

"And why am I...the purse..." Jessica tucked her head into Aaron's shoulder and he pulled an arm from around Jack to wrap it around her. He heard Spencer retreat. 

"I'm sorry," Aaron whispered to her. Jessica started to sob then. Jack tucked his head closer and Aaron felt his shirt getting wet. "I'm so sorry, Jack that I wasn't able to save her for you."

Aaron could barely remember anything after that. He was crying and then he swore that something picked him up but his legs were moving. Then he was down in bed. He tried to sit up but then something was placed on top of him and he smelled Jack. He curled his arms around him holding him tight. He felt a kiss on his forehead and then warmth over him as a blanket was pulled up. Then blessed nothingness.

An unknown time later, Aaron woke up in bed alone. He could smell something and realized it was pancakes and bacon. He got up out of the bed and moved towards his now shut bedroom to find a post it at eye level. Shower was written in all capital letters in Spencer's handwriting. He did as he was bade before he wandered into the kitchen to find Jessica cooking while Spencer was seated with Jack at the table. 

There was a list of things on the counter beside Jessica and when he stepped up he looked it over. It was a list of things that needed done as well as a smaller list of who had been told. Aaron saw that BAU team had been written and then crossed out. Jessica stepped up to him and hugged him tight and he returned it. 

"I've called Haley's job at the library. The Director is very upset and very understanding. He'll gather her things and keep them for whenever you are ready to grab them. I've gotten ahold of mom and dad. I told mom's nurse because she's not doing well. She's going to break it to them. Dad refuses to come into the city. I guess word got around about the situation at the bank. Spencer took a call outside. I heard him yell at one point. He didn't offer and I didn't ask. He's doing well with Jack, talking...has he lost a parent?"

"Not this way. His father left him and his mother when he was ten and his mother is sick." Aaron looked as Spencer and he nodded. Aaron smiled back at him. "She has schizophrenia and it got worse the older he got. So, while his parents are alive, he's sort of lost them, and I think sometimes that's worse than having them die. He's studied this though. He's one of the better death notifiers on the team. I thought for a long time that no one would top JJ but he does."

"So you are dating and on the same team?" Jessica asked, her voice soft.

"I've not actually gotten up the nerve to ask him out yet." 

"Oh. But he's here."

"Yes, he is because he's a good friend." Aaron hoped that Jessica got the hint and dropped it. He was thankful when she turned back to the stove. "So breakfast for dinner. That sounds like a good idea."

"Spencer made a cheesy hash brown casserole," Jack said, looking up at Aaron. Aaron nodded and looked back down at the list. Jack's school had been called. There were initials out from the rest. Things that Jessica would take care of and things that Aaron would need to. 

"Aaron, think we can talk in your bedroom for a moment?" Spencer asked.

"Sure."

Spencer ruffled Jack's hair as he stood up and Jack gave him a not quite smile. Aaron waited for him to pass before following him into the room. 

"Garcia and Morgan are chomping at the bit, but I was able to waylay them coming over. Tonight should be about the three of you. I told Jack I'd stay until you woke up. Morgan is not happy about being denied but I sicced Rossi on him. Prentiss and Blake are understanding. JJ's upset that it happened at all. I just wanted to make sure Jack was okay. Call me if you need anything."

"I need you here," Aaron said, being truthful. Spencer had been turning to leave the room but he stopped and turned back. "I _need_ you here."

"Are you sure?" 

Aaron stepped up to him and pulled him close. He'd meant for it to be a hug but instead his lips found Spencer's and he kissed him. Spencer tried to pull away but Aaron kept a hold of him. Pulling him close. He needed this. A connection with the man he loved. He kept the kiss chaste and pulled back when he was ready. "When things settle down, I'm taking you out on a proper date. Just me and you and good food."

"Okay," Spencer said with a smile. He leaned in for another quick kiss. "Jessica wants to talk to you about something so I'll take Jack back to his room. He wanted to show me a book he brought with him."

Aaron smiled at him and opened the door. Jack was waiting at his bedroom door and Spencer slipped in there with him. Aaron moved onto the kitchen. Jessica was shutting the oven door after slipping in a plate of pancakes. The bacon was almost done.

"Your job is important to you. It's important to Jack as well. I can step in when you need someone to watch him while you are on cases. I've moved into an apartment that's closer, about a year ago."

"Do you like it?"

"What do you mean?"

"I don't need the money from the sale of the house and Jack doesn't either. He's well taken care of. You can have the house. To live in or sell it. Buy a different house with less memories."

"Aaron," Jessica started.

"No. The house is wholly Haley's. I know that her will states it's to go to Jack but he's probably not going to want it. We can talk to him about it. If he does, then I'll help you find a better place. While I am sure that you wouldn't mind watching Jack here, there are times you are going to want to go home so a two bedroom is a good option. Jack can have a room that your parents can use when they visit. Just think about it. I'm off work for two weeks and we have all that time to find you a new place. My team would help you move. Haley told me that you hate where you are right now."

"Okay, Aaron." Jessica smiled at him and Aaron smiled back. With Spencer at his side and Jessica to help with Jack, he felt that he could make it. 

Jack took longer to get to sleep that night and Aaron brought out the baby monitors for the first time in a long while. Jack hadn't protested its use, thankfully. He understood that his dad was just worried. Aaron had pulled Jack's door shut all the way as the boy had asked and went to find Spencer. The genius was dressing to leave. Aaron watched as he picked up his messenger bag and that was what prompted him to react. Aaron was across the room and pulled the bag from his hands before he could get the strap over his head. He got a good look at Spencer's wide eyes before Aaron had him against the wall, kissing him again. This time there was no hesitancy on Spencer's part. 

When Spencer parted his lips and their tongues touched for the first time, Aaron moaned. Hands were sliding under his shirt and Aaron pulled back. He looked in Spencer's eyes. He'd been thinking about what exactly he wanted that night and the look in his eyes told him what was going to be the best thing. He worried about Jack waking up, knowing that Spencer had slept in his bed but the only thing that he could think about was older Spencer who slept on a couch because he couldn't do the guest bed alone and his Aaron was too afraid to sleep in the same bed as him. 

"Stay the night?" Aaron asked. 

"Yes." Spencer tugged his coat off and hung it up before toeing off his shoes. When he was stripped of his extras, Aaron grabbed his hand and pulled him back towards his bedroom. The monitor was already there and set up. Aaron was more than ready for this. He'd been celibate for so long. Spencer hands slid under his shirt again and their lips met again in a kiss. Aaron didn't worry about anything. He was ready for this. He wanted this. "Do you have supplies?"

"Lube, yes. Condoms no. I haven't been with anyone since Haley and we are tested enough for blood splatter transmission that it would have popped up." Aaron backed up towards the bed, pulling Spencer with him. When he sat down he pulled Spencer into his lap and started to kiss him again. 

"I have a confession," Spencer said, pulling back from the kiss. He laid his forehead on Aaron's though. "October 1984. Halloween party. Seven minutes in heaven."

Aaron remembered it. It was the only person that Aaron had really kissed besides Haley in college, the others from spin the bottle didn't count to him. There was guilt in Spencer's eyes and Aaron wondered why until he figured it out. Ben had been the only one that he'd ever told about kissing a guy in a closet at that party. So, either Spencer had been there or he'd been the one Aaron had been kissing. 

"It was you. How did you know that I was going to be there?"

"I didn't. I was on campus during a travel and some group of people took me as someone they recognized and invited me along. They had a spare costume and I went. It was my fifth travel since getting my ability back. I was having fun, the kind of fun I never indulged in during my own years at college. The spin the bottle room was the easiest for me to handle, not too many people. Also easy for me to run if I started to travel. I didn't expect to see you there. You'd never gone to anything like it before and never after, that I could tell."

"That's why you ran? You saw my face and knew what? That'd I'd recognize you?"

"No, it shocked me. It shocked me so bad that I started to travel. I had to get out of there because I knew that it wasn't when you met 'me'. The look of shock on your face at your house that day told me that you hadn't known who I was before. I freaked out. I almost blurted it out that night that you came to my apartment but I didn't."

"That tells me why I liked it so much. I chased you through that house." Aaron wasn't sure what he thought about that being Spencer. He looked into his happy eyes and decided that later was a good time to think about it. He pulled Spencer back in for a kiss. It wasn't that hard to get lost in the taste of him on his tongue and the feel of him under his hands. He tasted every single inch of skin as he pulled off each item of clothes. They only separated to take off pants and underwear and then Aaron had a naked Spencer on top of him in bed. It felt wonderful and had Aaron thrusting up into him. Spencer went after the lube first and when he sat up with lube on his fingers, Aaron closed his eyes and groaned. He waited for Spencer to move off of him so that he could be prepped but instead he heard a groan from the younger man instead. He opened his eyes to see Spencer with his legs splayed and a hand behind his back. Aaron sat up and kissed him, grabbing his hand as he did. 

"Aaron?"

"I want to feel you, love. You in me." Aaron steadied Spencer's hips while the younger man shifted from straddling Aaron to being in between his legs. Spencer was gentle as his first finger slid inside of Aaron. He'd played with fingering himself. In the few times he thought about going out and finding someone to take home. Thoughts about how many victims he'd given justice too when they had done the same thing had stopped him. 

Before he knew it, Aaron felt himself stretched. He hadn't even realized that Spencer had more than one in him. His soon to be lover stretched up and kissed him. Aaron pulled him close and tried not to make a noise as he felt the head of Spencer's cock at his entrance. 

"Relax or we are stopping," Spencer said as he pulled back from the kiss. Aaron nodded and relaxed. He wasn't afraid, he didn't know why he was tensing. Spencer shifted back to where he was kneeling back on his haunches. He smiled at Aaron before leaning down again but not to kiss him. Instead he licked at a nipple. Aaron didn't hold back the moans and gasps as Spencer helped him relax. 

When he couldn't stand it anymore, Aaron begged him to get inside of him. "Spencer, please. I don't want to come without you in me. Please." Aaron hitched his legs up as Spencer moved in closer again. The breech was slow and Aaron swore that Spencer was trying to torture him. He could tell that his lover was holding back. Nothing that he did had Sencer going faster though. It was slow and steady, the thrusts in and out of him. When Aaron couldn't take it anymore he pulled his knees up farther and forced the younger man to where they could kiss. Spencer laughed at the first kiss and settled down, bracing an arm above Aaron's head.

The change of angle and the first full thrust of Spencer into him from that new angle had Aaron throwing back his head and moaning loudly. Spencer dove forward and kissed him swallowing the moan. Aaron knew that he needed to not wake up Jack but what his lover was doing to him felt so good. He wanted more but every single thrust had him flying higher and higher and he knew he wouldn't last long. When he fell over the crest, his hands were on Spencer's shoulders and he was fairly certain that he had left scratches on his back. He squeezed his knees together, trapping Spencer on an upward thrust inside of him. He felt more than anything the feel of Spencer's body going taut as well. There was a final few small thrusts and then his lover collapsed on top of him. 

Aaron hissed when Spencer shifted and pulled out of him but before the younger man could do anything, Aaron wrapped his arms around him and rolled them both onto their sides. Aaron wanted more kisses before they fell asleep. He'd wake up at some point and dress again. He found lips again and kissed until Spencer pulled away.

"We need to at least clean up a little. And I don't have any clothes with me so..." Spencer's voice trailed off.

"I have a pair of pants you can sleep in and I think I have some things in your size. I know that you have that bracelet on your arm but I have clothes just in case something happens and you come back here naked from the future. Slacks and a sweater."

"Thank you." 

When they laid down a little while later with Aaron in a pair of shorts and Spencer in a pair of sleep pants tied as tight as they could go, Aaron wrapped his arms around his lover and sighed in contentment. He fell asleep knowing that as long as Spencer was with him, in his life in all the good ways, he'd be happy.

"I love you," Aaron whispered in Spencer's ear just as they were drifting off to sleep.

"Love you, too," Spencer whispered back.


	50. February 2011

Aaron settled into the booth as he watched Morgan, Garcia, and Prentiss out on the dance floor. He settled there easily with Spencer at his side. The past two months had been hard but having Spencer abound made things easier. Jack hadn’t had a nightmare about Haley’s death in two weeks. Aaron and Spencer had been on seven dates so far that hadn’t been interrupted by cases. The only thing that was upsetting was that between cases, Jack, and Spencer’s own traveling, the pair hadn’t been able to have sex again yet. It wasn’t for lack of trying either. 

“So,” Morgan said as he dropped into his seat with the girls trailing behind him. The table was just big enough for all of them with four seats on the outer edge and a booth just big enough for four on the inside. Blake and Dave were on Spencer’s other side while JJ had taken the seat next to Dave. “How exactly do you keep of this straight in your head?”

Aaron looked at Morgan, unsure exactly who he was talking to and what he was talking about. The younger agent tipped his bottle of beer at Spencer though. 

“I’m sure that if I was normal, I’d have some issues with it. With my memory, all I need is a date. The area changes thoughout the years. I had a harder time when I was younger because well, Hotch’s backyard never changed. Sometimes I only knew the rough year because of how old he was. Then when Tom was hired in as the groundskeeper, he’d leave the day’s before paper in a spot in the garage. I could slip in as a child or as an adult and look at the date.”

“How exactly do you get around?” Garcia asked. The dancers finally seemed like they were getting their breath back. Aaron took a second to brush his leg with Spencer’s hoping that the younger man didn’t react other than to press back. Spencer pressed his leg back and smiled. It could have been a smile for Garcia’s question, but Aaron was sure that it was for him. 

“Money. It’s easy to change in current bills for older bills. There are many ways of doing it and I’ve even been able to take things back to younger me to make sure that he has access to money. I leave plenty of smaller bills for him.” Spencer picked up his wine glass and drained the last sip of it. He slid it over towards Aaron and picked up his messenger bag from the floor. He slid it onto the table. “I bought this bag because it’s sturdy and doesn’t really look out of place either now or in the past or the future. It wasn’t hard to split the seams and slip some of my sensors into it. I’ve also attached some to my shoes, just to be safe.”

“Show us the sensor thing?” JJ asked as she leaned forward. Spencer slid his bag back down to the floor, ghosting his hand over Aaron’s knee as he did. The bracelet came off easily and he handed it over to her. Aaron decided that he looked weird without it. “How does it work?”

“When I start to travel I give off a bit of an electrical field. It triggers these,” Spencer said as he pointed at the bracelet that Garcia had in her hand. “They give off the same field and it extends the field a little to take my clothes and such with me. Of course, by the time that I had what I needed to make it, I’d stopped traveling. The first test of my technology was a blind test and I am very happy that it worked even if it dropped me someplace I was ill prepared for.”

“What happened?” Blake asked. 

Aaron inhaled subtly. They had discussed this not long after Spencer had joined the team but were waiting for someone on the team to bring up anything that could connect to Foyet. 

“I went into the future a few years. My first time of traveling after over a decade, I appeared in a living room with a guy pointing a gun at a woman. He was talking to someone on a phone. The woman was terrified. I just stood there staring. The woman saw me but she turned her eyes away quickly. I didn’t know what to do. I had no weapon and if I moved, he’d see me. There was no way that I saw that I could help so I stayed silent for the moment. Then another me popped into the room right in the guy’s line of sight. It only took seconds for the second me to pull his gun and fire. Caught the guy in the arm. The guy fired back and caught me in the shoulder. The final shot that the other me did, shot the guy right between the eyes. I’ve been told in the future that I do my best work under intense terror. The woman fainted and I barely had time to catch her. I just stared at the other me who disappeared. Just barely a minute later, someone else bursts in the front door. Gun drawn. I set the woman’s head down on the floor and backed up. I was so scared that I just stood there. When he lowered the gun a little I tried to take a step back but he raised the gun again and I felt it. I sat there and prayed that he wouldn’t shoot while I was leaving. He didn’t. I appeared in an empty classroom at Quantico, shaking.”

“I would not have wanted to be the local that dealt with that,” Morgan said with a shaky laugh. Garcia and JJ nodded with him. Prentiss, Blake, and Dave though were looking introspective. There was just enough in the story for one of them to guess it. “So there is an older you running around with a gunshot to the shoulder with no way to explain it.”

“I’m sure that someone is taking care of it. I know that older, older me doesn’t seem to have any issues with it. It was my left but I still use it for a lot of things.”

“Is that why that case is classified?” Prentiss asked. 

Aaron looked over at her. 

“How would one explain revolver ammo when Hotch uses a Glock?” Prentiss asked.

“What?” Garcia asked. She looked around the table, but Aaron knew that everyone else’s gazes were just as confused as hers.

“Foyet,” Dave whispered. He looked at Spencer and then at Aaron and back again. He looked at him with a new expression on his face. “That’s why you were so protective of Aaron after Haley was killed two months ago. You saved her there just to have her die like that.”

“Yes. It wasn’t something that I was warned about. Big things like that, I don’t warn my younger self. Not unless I was warned in the past. It’s confusing but I can keep it straight. My older self went into the room, knowing that he was going to get shot.”

“So you know what day you are going back?” JJ asked.

“Not really but I’ll know it as soon as I show up in the living room. I never know where I am going. Each time feels no different than the one before or the one after. Unfortunately, I know that I’ll travel again not long after coming back after getting shot.”

Aaron winced knowing what the younger man was talking about there. He was glad that day was in the past for him but he knew that getting shot and seeing a younger Aaron lose control like that was coming for Spencer. 

“Is that something that happens a lot?”

“Yes and no. I cut myself pretty badly when I was younger but didn’t travel. Mom and dad were home. I seem to travel to safe places. Or places I think I’ll be safe.”

Aaron caught Dave’s eye and pleaded with him to change the topic. Dave nodded and turned to Spencer. “So you and Aaron have said before that you traveled to him. At his parent’s house?”

“Yes. And Hargrave a few times. That place was less often, most of our interactions were in the backyard of his parent’s house.” Spencer relaxed back into the seat and Aaron smiled. 

“How did you hide from the help?” 

“Help?” Morgan asked.

“My parents were very influential. There was a cook, cleaning staff, mother had a driver, and then the groundskeeper. I didn’t find out until Tristan wasn’t coming around that at least the groundskeeper was always aware of him. Tristan never told me and neither did any of the groundskeepers. I’m sure the cooks thought that I was either feeding stray animals or a stray person as most of them never batted an eye when I was taking basically two full meals outside in the spring, summer, and fall on odd occasions. Of course, we’d just sneak food straight from the kitchen when we were alone.”

The team looked like they wanted to ask. This was the most that Aaron had ever talked to anyone except for Tristan and Spencer about his childhood.

 

“I saw something very interesting the last time I was visiting you and Jack. A book on the shelves in the living room. _Self First Aid Care_. I had looked at it before but that was years ago. You used to keep it in your office. What caught my eye this time was the author. Well that and the fact that it’s a book that doesn’t exist anywhere. I’ve looked it up before. I wasn’t aware until I looked at the publication date that I’d been looking for it before it existed.”

“When I started to travel again, I wanted to get a book on first aid to Aaron. We spent a lot of time in the woods. Things change and I wanted to make sure that he had the best so I wrote it myself and a friend from Cal-Tech printed and bound it for me as a favor. I slipped it under his pillow one night.”

“You went into Hotch’s room when he was a kid as an adult?” Blake asked with a raised eyebrow but a smile on her face.

“He carried me to bed after I fell asleep in the woods. I never got to see Spencer much as a child much like I’ve not seen Tristan much as an adult. We know the stigma.”

“I just choose not to go around Aaron when he’s an adult and I am a child, unless Jack is around. I’ve played with Jack a few times and sometimes when it’s just Haley around Jack.”

“Does Jack know?” JJ asked. She looked like she wanted to ask a lot more than just that.

“No. Not yet. I want to give it a few years. Jessica knows.” Aaron couldn’t help but smile as he thought about that. Spencer outright laughed.

“And what’s so funny?” Morgan asked as he took a sip of his beer. The whole table was running low. Aaron debated more and when Prentiss stood up and moved towards the bar he nodded his head. Spencer shook his head. Aaron waited to answer until she came back to the table. A waitress would bring the drinks when they were ready. 

“Spencer showed up in the middle of the apartment one day. He’d left two days before. She was in the middle of the living room folding my laundry even though I told her I’d get it when I got home. I was in court all day and wasn’t sure when I was going to get home. Jessica decided to stay at my place instead of taking Jack back to hers. I came home to find Jessica, Spencer, and Jack all watching a movie. Seems that Spencer hadn’t been allowed to go home. Thankfully, he had a go bag in his car and was able to change.”

“Where did you go? You never said.” Garcia asked.

“Home. It was before I was born. So, I wandered the strip for two days, playing poker and such. Got kicked out of a casino or two. Came home a thousand dollars richer. I looked up after I appeared and there was Jessica with a pair of Hotch’s underwear in hand. There was no mistaking that I hadn’t come in the door as her back was to it and I appeared right in front of her. For an adult, she was surprisingly easy to convince. Even if she did see me just appear. I’ve come and gone in front of others and they don’t believe me. Hotch did before he even saw me leave but then that’s the beauty of children. We were going to tell Haley and then Jack before…” Spencer trailed off and reached over to take Aaron’s glass and took a sip. Aaron grabbed his glass of wine and moved to the bar to fill it. The waitress was going back with the rest of their drinks. When he turned back to look while he waited, he saw Spencer finish off his first glass of bourbon. No one on the team had ever seen him drink more than wine and sometimes a beer. His tolerance for the stronger stuff was up there and Aaron wondered exactly how it had gotten that high given his size. He just didn’t like to drink. 

Taking the wine back to the table, Aaron handed it over and moved the fresh bourbon glass out of Spencer’s reach. The younger man looked up at him and Aaron felt just childish enough to stick his tongue out at him. The entire table erupted into laughter and Aaron ducked his head a little. He shifted his hand that had been on his thigh to lay it on Spencer’s. His lover startled but it wasn’t noticeable to the rest of the team because they were still laughing. 

The topic turned away from Spencer and Aaron after that. Instead, everyone was talking about how their families were. Blake and Dave were the first to leave once they’d finished their second drinks. Morgan, Garcia, and Prentiss went back out onto the dance floor. JJ stayed seated, talking about Henry with Spencer and Aaron.

“Jack wants me to see about bringing Henry over for a play day. He had fun playing with him when we did that team meal at your place. Maybe we can set up something for a weekend and then even if we get called out, Jessica has said that she wouldn’t mind entertaining Henry for the day if Will has to work or even if he wants a day to himself.”

“Entertain?” JJ asked. 

“My influence. I was reading a book on the social gatherings through the ages and well…Jack saw me and we discussed it. I think that he wants to send an invitation to Henry and everything. I hope that Henry likes macaroni and cheese and green beans because that was the dinner menu when we last talked.”

“Oh, I hope that we don’t have a case because I kind of need to see that. I’m sure that you’ll help him plan it all, Spence?” 

“Yes. He’s already contracted me to help him. I’m getting paid in him doing his homework by the way. The contract says so.” That comment had JJ laughing. Aaron smiled as he remembered a somber Jack coming to him wanting to talk about how to get someone to do work. That had started a two hour talk about what Aaron had used to go and what it meant to be a lawyer. He’d drawn up the contract and had been there when Jack had presented it to Spencer who had just gotten to their place for dinner and a Disney movie. He’d also been the witness who had signed the contract. Spencer had held it together and hadn’t started laughing until after it had been signed and Jack had left the room to put it someplace safe. Spencer had told him then that Jack was exactly like him. Too stern for his own good when he needed to be. Aaron been a little upset but watching Jack that night had proved to him that Spencer was correct, but that it wasn’t a bad thing. He was a kid who had a lot of fun, who was healing from the death of his mother and if all he got from Aaron was his sternness, he would take that. Jack’s childhood wasn’t being ruined by him. He wasn’t his own father. 

“He’s such a little Hotch,” JJ said. 

“That’s what I said.” Spencer turned to look at him. “Is Jack still going with Jessica to the Brooks’ for the weekend?”

“Yes.” Aaron watched Spencer’s face as he answered. He wasn’t sure what was going through his mind. 

“I need to get going. Will’s got Henry down and we are going to attempt a date of sorts.” JJ smiled as she spoke. She waved at the dancers on the floor and all three waved back at her. Aaron signaled to them that he was going as well and then pointed at Spencer to tell them that he was taking him as well. Aaron had driven him over. While Spencer could drive, he didn’t like to on the off chance that he did end up traveling. In the city he could park somewhere but on the highway between DC and Quantico, there wasn’t really a good way to ditch the car. It’s why he took the metro to and from work or a taxi if need be. Or Aaron sent Anderson after him if it was a big enough emergency. “Want a ride, Spence?” 

“I’ve got him. His stuff’s in my car anyway.”

“Okay,” JJ said as she stood up. Aaron and Spencer slid out of the booth. JJ hugged Spencer and made him look at her. “You did really well with Sammy, Spence. We wouldn’t have gotten as far as we did as quickly as we did without you.”

Spencer’s only response was to blush and turn his head away from her. JJ smiled and nodded at Aaron before she left. Spencer never took praise well but took it from JJ, Blake, and Prentiss better than he took it from the males of the team. Aaron figured that it had to do with his mother being the only one to praise him as a child, other than Aaron. Spencer grabbed his bag from under the table and shouldered it waving at the rest of the team before he moved out the door. Aaron turned back to the table to set down money and saw that Spencer had already set down enough to cover their drinks plus a healthy tip for the waitress and the bartender. Aaron picked it up and moved over to Morgan along with the money that the others had left on the table for theirs. 

“Pretty Boy tired?”

“No. I am. I’m his ride and he doesn’t dance so…with me he goes.”

Morgan smiled and took the money, nodding as he did. Aaron was never sure if Morgan knew that he and Spencer were more than friends. He was unsure if the team as a whole thought that they were a couple. He didn’t ask and they said nothing. There was nothing that could be done to them unless they made a disastrous decision in the field to save each other but as Spencer and he had talked, it wasn’t like that decision wouldn’t be made if it was JJ, Morgan, or anyone else on the team. All of them had made the choice when they started to call each other family instead of a team and the whole of their superiors knew it. Aaron thought that was what made them the elite unit of the BAU. Their closeness made their profiles and their work better.

Garcia surprised Aaron with a hug but he gave her a quick, hard one back. She giggled as he let go of her. A wave at Prentiss and he was leaving. Spencer was waiting at the door with a smile on his face.

“You indulge her and she loves you for it.”

“I’m well aware, but it makes her happy and a happy Garcia is a happy team.”

Spencer laughed as they moved out of the building. Aaron had found a nice close spot so it wasn’t a long walk. Aaron clicked off the alarm as Spencer rounded the back to get into the passenger side. He set his bag on the back seat next to his go bag. Aaron was quite happy that he drove left handed as it freed his right to touch. When they were out on the road for the short trip to Spencer’s apartment, Aaron laid his hand on Spencer’s thigh. The younger man’s hand came to rest on top of it, not stopping his movements with the tips of his fingers on the inside of his slack’s clad inner thigh. 

Aaron hadn’t regretted their first time together. He’d needed it more than he’d thought when he woke up in the night twice with nightmares and just having a body in bed with him had helped. They still roomed together on the cases where they had to double up but other than falling asleep in each other’s arms, Aaron wanted to go no farther when on the job. 

“Is Jack looking forward to visiting his grandparents?”

“Yes. He knows his grandmother isn’t doing well and he wants to see her. Roy on the other hand. Roy is angry and right now I am the scapegoat for that. My name was released in the paper as the agent, but it wasn’t listed on the front page that I arrived and took it over after Haley had been killed so he blames me. Jack overheard him say something over Christmas and Jessica has raked him over the coals for it and said that if she hears a single bad word about me, she’ll take Jack home and he won’t be coming back out until her mother’s funeral. I’m letting her handle that. I’ve told her that I’ll go with anything she says.”

“It’s sad that he’s so angry. Hopefully he keeps a civil tongue in his head.” 

Aaron nodded as he pulled his car into the garage for Spencer’s apartment building. The younger man turned to him and gave him a weird look, but he said nothing. Aaron parked in the spot beside Spencer’s Amazon and shut the car off. 

“Did you want to come up?” Spencer asked as he got out of the car. Because of Jack, all of their interactions have happened at Aaron’s. Aaron had grabbed his still filled go bag at the office when they left for a reason. He wanted to leave it at Spencer’s for the odd night that they could go back there. 

“I was hoping to stay the night,” Aaron said with a smile on his face. 

“Oh,” Spencer said and Aaron thought for a second that Spencer didn’t want him to. He let that feeling swell for a few seconds, but then he got a good look at the younger man’s face. He wasn’t upset. “I have no fresh food. Everything is frozen or boxed. And none of that is breakfast food. I don’t keep milk on hand between cases and traveling.”

“I’m too tired to go to the store tonight but we can go tomorrow if you wish, in the morning. We’ve already eaten dinner at the restaurant so we shouldn’t be hungry. What do you do for breakfast after cases like this?”

“There’s a little diner I eat at. They have good coffee and wonderful biscuits.”

“Then we can go there. Everything for the past few months has revolved around Jack and I know that you are fine with that. You’ve not complained or gotten upset once but this weekend is about us. What we want to do.” Aaron grabbed his spare bag and carried it up to the door leading into the back of the complex. Spencer grabbed his things and followed him, an odd look on his face. Aaron let him think as they walked up to the apartment and Spencer let them in. 

Spencer stopped just a step into the apartment and Aaron moved to grab his gun but as his fingers closed around air, he remembered that his gun was in the trunk of his car. He had his backup on him but when Spencer just bent down and picked up something, Aaron relaxed. It was an envelope that had been shoved under his door. The return address on it was from the complex, it was official looking.

“We had the locks changed. The whole place. When they did, they only gave me two sets instead of the five I requested.”

“Five?”

“Yes. One set for me. A spare to keep around just in case a me from the past is around long term and does a run to the store. A set for my desk at work in case I lose my first set. And two sets for the team. One for you and one for Morgan.”

“Me?” Aaron asked. He knew that Morgan had a set of keys but that was because Morgan had a set to everyone’s places. He was official keeper of the keys for the team. 

“That way you can come in whenever you want.” Spencer opened up the envelope and handed over a set. “I have my set and the one for the other mes. I need to take these two into work. The envelope was folded over and tucked into the front of a go bag that was sitting on a table just beside the door. Aaron was a little shocked at it. There was space for another bag. “I rotate. When I get this one restocked and the clothes cleaned it’ll go there by the door and the other will go into work with me. This is my hot weather bag. I still have the cold one at work.”

“That’s very detailed and I shouldn’t expect less from you.”

“Next case is a double up case. Can you make sure to bring your personal tablet with you?” Spencer carried his dirty go bag into his bedroom and then set it on the floor. Aaron followed with his and Spencer took it from him as he entered the room. There was an empty spot on the dresser for it.

“Why?”

“Because you don’t want a bored five year old me in a hotel room all day with nothing to do. Don’t ask me why I join us on the case but I do. I don’t help with it. I know the date and given that I appear in a hotel room with your bag and my bag, it has to be a case and it’s in a week.”

“Good to know. Obviously you don’t know when we start the case but it’s good to know. I’ll make a note in my phone and I’ll make sure to take it with me to work each day. I agree a bored Tristan is not a good idea.”

Spencer hummed moved around the room, grabbing a set of pillows from the closet and throwing them onto the bed. Aaron enjoyed watching him shift his own pillows over to one side and placing the new set beside them. Aaron moved up behind and wrapped his arms around his waist. 

“Let’s go to the living room,” Aaron whispered in his ear. 

“Why?” Spencer asked, turning in his arms. 

“Because I feel like making out with you on the couch.”

“Oh.” Spencer looked perplexed but not upset. “I’ve never made out on a couch, much less anywhere else.”

“I know. We’re still in the new phase even if we are acting like a long term couple.” Aaron pulled and Spencer went with him. He pulled Spencer’s vest off of him not wanting to have to stop in the middle to remove it. He removed his own jacket and laid it over the back of the couch on the other end of where he sat down. He pulled Spencer down into his lap and kissed his cheek before just rubbing their noses together. Spencer laughed but settled into a better position as he straddled his legs. Their groins weren’t pressed together yet but it wouldn’t take much for them to do it. “I want your mouth on mine.”

“Yes,” Spencer breathed before he leaned down and started the first kiss. Aaron settled his hands on Spencer’s hips while the younger man settled his down on Aaron’s shoulders as a balance. When the kiss was deepened with a parting of lips, Aaron pulled Spencer’s shirt from his pants. His lover arched into his hands at the first touch of hands under the shirt. Nimble fingers trailed down his shoulders and started to work on unbuttoning his shirt. He ran his hands up Spencer’s sides. He felt his shirt being parted but it wasn’t pulled out from his pants. Instead, Spencer just seemed to want to touch. 

Aaron had been hard since he’d pulled Spencer into his lap. The younger man though was just getting fully hard. He wanted to explore. Figure out what Spencer liked and what he didn’t. He was barely paying attention to what his lover was doing up until he felt the first brush of fingers over his hipbone. He waited and was rewarded with a scratch of nails over it next. Aaron hissed and bucked up into Spencer. He slipped his arm around Spencer’s back, holding him in place. Haley had found that by accident and Spencer found it on the first try? Aaron pulled back to ask why he had done that but he couldn’t talk because Spencer’s head just moved downward and kissed at his jaw. He moved lower and lower to go after the pulse point on Aaron’s neck. The clink of his belt told him that the younger man was going for more than just making out and Aaron didn’t want to stop him. 

Lifting up to allow his belt to be pulled free, Aaron also used it to take off his shirt and then pulled at Spencer’s. The genius quickly unbuttoned his shirt and threw it behind him. Aaron worked on reciprocating on pants as he realized that Spencer had done more than just undoing his belt. He tried to get the other man off his lap so he could take off his pants but Spencer just pulled him in for a kiss. Aaron gave up and dove into the kiss with full enthusiasm. 

The first touch of warm hand on his hard cock nearly had Aaron coming right then. He bucked up into the touch and sighed as he felt Spencer’s cock line up to his as well. He was jerking them both off at the same time. Aaron settled back a little on the couch, forcing Spencer to lean over him to keep being able to kiss him. Spencer didn’t make a sound, just followed him forward but he moaned when he started to stroke them again, the new angle making it feel better. Aaron felt slick on his cock and he reached down to feel. It felt like lube. Where had Spencer gotten the lube from?

Something was shoved into his hand and Aaron knew that it was lube. He blindly opened it one handed and then reached behind Spencer to coat one of his hands. He dropped the lube beside them and then reached down. As soon as his fingers brushed their cocks, Spencer let go with both his hand and his mouth. Aaron wasn’t going to last long, not with the breathy pants in his ear. The feel of both of them in his hand, hard and hot made Aaron want to roll them to where Spencer was under him. He wanted to bring them both off by thrusting their cocks together but that would lose him the feel of breath on his ear and the look of Spencer’s gaze centered on their cocks. He couldn’t take his eyes off of the face beside his and the way that Spencer’s eyes kept darting to him told him that he knew. Still Aaron squeezed and stroked their cocks.

“Close, Aaron,” Spencer whispered. He shifted and took Aaron’s mouth in another kiss, thrusting his tongue into mouth as soon as Aaron parted his lips. The arm around Spencer pulled him closer and Aaron felt his muscles tense and then warmth started to spread on his fingers as he came to a top stroke. Aaron let his own cock go to stroke at Spencer until his body stopped shuddering. He was about to take himself back into hand when he felt finger caress him and then a sure grip had him surrounded. Aaron used his now free hand to pull Spencer even closer to kiss him more, not caring that he was spreading Spencer’s own release all over him. The genius didn’t seem to care either as he moaned into Aaron’s mouth. His hand twisted as he came to the head of Aaron’s cock and he was done. He shouted into Spencer’s mouth and came all over the hand that had been stroking him. 

“Sleepy,” Aaron said when he finally pulled away from Spencer and let his head drop to the back of the couch. Spencer smiled but it was a tired smile as well. Aaron’s head was full of thoughts of what they could do in the morning, before and after going and getting breakfast at the diner that Spencer liked. He let those thoughts fill his head as Spencer pulled him towards the bathroom and they cleaned up silently. They settled naked under the sheets on Spencer’s bed and Aaron pulled his lover close. 

“Never made out and had sex on a couch before.”

Aaron nodded and closed his eyes. Then he remembered the question that he’d been wanting to ask. “You’ve said that it’s only ever been me. Was that your first time?”

“No,” Spencer said and there was an odd note to his voice. Aaron tried to catalogue it through the various tones that he’d heard Spencer use. He was ashamed. Aaron hated that. He didn’t care if Spencer had been a virgin or not their first time. Yes the thought was heady but he’d not been a virgin either.

“It’s fine. I just wanted to be sure. I don’t care. Sometime you’ll have to tell me about it so that I can make sure if you had a bad time, I can fix it.”

“You don’t understand.” Spencer rolled over and Aaron laid back when his shoulder was pushed at. The younger man leaned over him with a grin on his face. “It wasn’t my first time but it was my first time with an Aaron in my correct timeline.”

“What?” 

“After I started to travel again, for a while I was bouncing everywhere. I popped into a living room to find an older Aaron standing there. I asked where Spencer and Jack were and he answered that Spencer was in Vegas visiting mom and that Jack was at a summer science camp. I nodded and moved to sit down on the couch. I noted the date and set my bag down. I’d visited enough at that point to not feel too out of place. It was near dinner time in Aaron’s time and in mine it had been around lunch. I had been studying so I hadn’t stopped to eat. Aaron said he would fix dinner and asked if pasta and meatballs was fine. I said that whatever he was having would be fine. It wasn’t until after I had gotten back that I figured out that he’d set the whole thing up from the start. He knew when I was going to arrive and the wine was my favorite and the dessert.”

“An older me seduced you and took your virginity?” Aaron asked, shocked.

“Then, he was a lot older to me but yes a twice as old as me Aaron took my virginity. It was wonderful and perfect. Just like our first time in the same time period was wonderful and perfect. I actually figure that it happens not too long in the future from now because well…” Spencer smiled and ducked his head a little. “There’s only a little more wrinkle lines around his eyes and mouth. Given how fast I know your face ages, I’d say that it happens soon.”

“You said you looked at the date.”

“I did. There wasn’t a clock with the year though. Just a little block date thing on the desk. It listed month and day. If I knew the day of the week, I would be able to extrapolate out and figure out the year. July fifteenth at five thirty four pm is when I appear. Also it wasn’t at my place or yours but a new place. It was a house with a big backyard.”

“So after we move into a house and we aren’t on a case on July fifteenth and I am home around five I know to expect you and to seduce you, got it.”

“I’m sure that I remind you. It also has to have me visiting mom and Jack at science camp. It was a good time though. He was gentle and loving and it was everything I hoped my first time with you would be since I’d started to imagine it.”

“I feel a little jealous,” Aaron said but he could see that Spencer wasn’t trying to make him upset, just telling him the truth as he saw it. He was glad that his first time was something that he could look back on with happiness and Aaron was looking forward to it. Spencer laid down settling his head on Aaron’ chest, pulling the covers up just a little more to keep them warm. Aaron made a promise to himself that in the morning he’d wake Spencer up in just as wonderful a way. The evening out of the breathing of the younger man told Aaron that he was slipping into sleep and Aaron allowed himself to follow.


	51. April 2011

Letting himself into his empty apartment was something that Aaron was loathe to do. He had gotten so used to Jack being there when they were not out on cases. Then there were the nights that Spencer stayed over. That wasn't going to happen until Aaron was sure he could look at Spencer and not just tell him the truth. There was no way he'd be able to keep a straight face. He'd barely made it through the funeral weeks ago with Spencer crying. Aaron was alone in keeping the secret on the team. He'd pulled in favor after favor to hide Prentiss from everyone. She was in witness protection somewhere in the United States. There was a proper set of failsafes that would be tripped if Doyle even thought of looking for her. She'd been forced to have her hair cut and when it was safe it was going to be dyed. She hadn't been happy about it but she had agreed to it. Of course she was still in a hospital. He got emails about the state of the small trust in Jack's name that told him how she was doing. 

Aaron missed Spencer like an ache in his heart but he couldn't keep up with the lying. Spencer still came over but Aaron made sure that Jack was a wonderful buffer for it all. He watched from the sides as Spencer spent time with Jack. There had been a break down when Aaron had taken Spencer home with him after the hospital but he hadn't come back to Aaron for comfort in the time since then. A discussion with Jack had told him that he was going to JJ's. He had been hurt at first but he'd seen the good in it. He didn't have to manage his reactions as much. He could be himself.

Flicking the small overhead light on for the bar area, he moved towards it. Aaron unlocked the cabinet and pulled out the expensive bottle of bourbon. He poured an over large glass of it and downed it in one go. He sighed as he set the glass down and then turned. Sitting on the couch was Spencer. Aaron looked at him and tried to place how old he was but the shadows cast over his face hide his true age from him. The haircut though told him that he was older. 

"You’re home late," Spencer said as he stood up. He moved over toward Aaron and reached around him to take the bottle of alcohol and lifted it and drank straight from it. 

"Had too much work to do." 

Spencer hummed and handed the bottle back to him. Aaron took a drink before setting it back down and grabbing Spencer, kissing him. If Spencer was allowed to fuck future Aarons, Aaron could fuck future Spencers. He hauled him close and ravaged his mouth. Spencer gave back as good as he got. Aaron backed Spencer into the wall and where he'd been so careful with him in all their sexual encounters before this, he wasn't careful this time. He grabbed hands and slammed them into the wall above their heads and Spencer just moaned into his mouth. Their teeth clacked together and Aaron just pushed even harder. He didn't gentle the kiss down any until he tasted blood. Pulling back he looked at Spencer's face and found that there was smeared blood on his lip but it didn't look like his skin was split. The younger man just darted out his tongue and licked up the blood. That meant that Aaron's lip was the one that was split but he didn't feel the pain of it. The pain in his heart was greater.

"Where's Jack?"

"I asked Jessica to keep him tonight. It sounds horrible but I couldn't deal with him tonight." Aaron tried to read the look that came over the other man's face but he couldn't. He wanted to ask how long she was going to be gone. How long their family was going to ache with her loss before he could bring her out of hiding but also didn't want to know. To stop himself from asking, he kissed his lover again. Spencer pulled him in by the neck and thrust up into him. He was feeling desperate to Aaron it seemed.

Hands dropped to Spencer's pants and jerked the belt open and he pulled hard enough on the pants to break the button, but he didn't care. Shoving down on the other man's pants, Aaron relished the gasp that came from his mouth. He stepped back and pulled Spencer with him before helping him out of his pants which had pooled at his feet. There was a moment where the younger man almost fell over when trying to get his pants off but Aaron grabbed his upper arm to stop him. He was fairly certain that it would bruise but he didn't care. He needed this. He needed something to feel alive and he was certain that was why Spencer had traveled back to him. To help him. As Spencer backed down the hall with just a button up on, Aaron stripped himself naked. By the time he made it into the bedroom, Spencer had his shirt open and was about to take it off but Aaron kissed him and drove him backwards onto the bed. His hand reached out and snagged the lube from the nightstand. He'd found it under the bed and hadn't had a chance to put it up. 

Coating two fingers, he slid the first into Spencer and watched the man's eyes close in pleasure. Leaning over, he took the right side nipple into his mouth and bit. Spencer's hand grabbed his hair and Aaron expected to be pulled away but instead it held him there. He thrust his finger in and out a few times before switching to two. He felt Spencer's muscles give and the younger man thrust onto his fingers. Other than gasps, Spencer was quiet. It was so unlike their other encounters. Usually there was moans and small pleas but this time nothing. He chalked it up to the grief that the younger man was feeling and pushed it from his mind. He pulled his fingers free and snagged the lube again to coat his cock. He licked up to Spencer's neck as he centered himself to push into his lover. Spencer arched his back off the bed and Aaron bit down to keep him from trying to get away. He didn't stop pushing until he was bottomed out. The genius was coated in a sheen of sweat.

"Fuck, Aaron. Yes. Hard. I want you to fuck me hard." Spencer tried to thrust down on the cock inside of him but Aaron was holding him down and stopping him. He released his neck, seeing that it would probably bruise but didn't care. 

"Roll over. Up on your knees." Aaron leaned back, pulling out of him carefully. Spencer rolled to his stomach and went to his knees but he didn't kneel down. Instead he ripped his shirt off his body and tossed it to the side. He leaned over and braced himself on his arms. Aaron lined up and slid back inside of him, hard and fast. Spencer's head dropped and his body shivered. Aaron stayed upright as he thrust in and out of Spencer. He wasn't gentle as he fucked his guilt out on Spencer. He wrapped a hand around the man under him's side and brushed his fingers over the tattoo. There was no raised skin but Aaron could see it in his mind, see his hands splayed over it.

When he was close, he looked and saw that Spencer had an arm thrown up and braced on the headboard. Aaron realized that they had moved up the bed a little. He started to feel a little bad but he knew that if he was hurting Spencer, the younger man would stop him and he sounded like he was into it. When Aaron reached around and palmed his cock, the younger man dropped his head onto a pillow and screamed. His entire body tensed and Aaron felt his cock twitch as he came. Aaron leaned up and braced an arm on the headboard and fucked into him harder and harder until he came himself. 

It wasn't until after he'd pulled out carefully, checking for blood, and let himself drop to the bed that he felt the tears. Spencer was on his stomach, his face turned towards him but his eyes closed. 

"I'm sorry," Aaron whispered but the opening of eyes told him that Spencer had heard him. "I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. I need to know that you forgive me." He knew that he and Spencer had made it through this. Whatever the outcome, he and Spencer were together in the future but that didn't mean that Spencer had fully forgiven him. He knew that tears had to be rolling down his face but he didn't care.

"Aaron? What do I have to forgive you for?" Spencer reached out with a hesitant hand and brushed his knuckles down his face, gathering up some of the tears. "I wanted sex and you didn't hurt me."

"No, for lying. For lying and telling you that Emily was dead." 

"WHAT?" Spencer shot up in the bed and looked down at Aaron and that's when Aaron saw that there was no tattoo. He reached out a hand and checked and the skin was unmarred. He looked into a shocked face. "What do you mean you are lying about Emily being dead?"

"I..." Aaron sat up as well. This wasn't a future Spencer. This was his Spencer with a new haircut. He looked at the younger man and knew that he'd made a big mistake. He needed to make sure that Spencer told no one. "Spencer, please you can't tell anyone. No one knows." Aaron leaned up and grabbed him by the shoulders. "You CAN'T tell ANYONE!"

"Let me go!" Spencer yelled and shoved him back. He scrambled off the bed and looked around the room. He moved to his shirt and grabbed it. Aaron bounded off the bed, knowing that he was going to go and find the rest of his clothes. He grabbed a pair of sleep pants from his drawer and slipped them on, moving too quickly after his lover and nearly tripping. By the time he caught up with Spencer the other man had his pants on, as well as one of his socks. He was jumping around on one foot trying to pull up his other sock. Aaron grabbed his arm and spun him back around. He looked into Spencer's eyes and he could tell that something was off with him. The alcohol in his own system was affecting him more than it should have been and that was when he remembered that he hadn't eaten lunch much less dinner. That wasn't what was going on with Spencer though. His lover's eyes were off, duller than normal and not from pain. 

"Spencer, please. She's safe, but if anyone thinks that she's alive, Doyle will go after her and kill her," Aaron begged. He needed Spencer to understand why he did it. Her life was worth the lies.

"Because I am a horrible liar." Spencer dropped onto the arm of the couch and started to put his shoes on. Aaron was still. He couldn't move forward. He'd fucked this up so bad. "You know exactly what this kind of thing can do to me, Aaron. There was no way that this went through the Bureau because Michaels would have told me. Which means that you don't even trust us with this. Morgan spouts off at the mouth and JJ's naive in some respects but I've shown that I am a consummate liar. But no, it's not that you won't tell me, you'll only tell who you think is an older me. What were you hoping for absolution for lying to me? That older me would forgive you? You didn't even ask me how old I was so you were hoping that this was short term. Well you know what, Aaron?"

Spencer stood up and moved towards the door, grabbing his coat and slipping it on before grabbing his messenger bag. He jerked the door open and then turned back to Aaron. "Fuck you. I don't...I've never been disappointed in you. Even when you screamed to me that you wanted your father to not have died of a heart attack because it would prolong his pain. I could understand that but this...I don't think that we need to see each other for a while. Not until I am sure that being around you isn't going to make me travel. If Jack wants to see me, just text."

The door was swinging shut and it slammed with a finality that Aaron didn't want to think about. Was this the end of them? Had he done the impossible and changed the future?

Aaron slept poorly that night. He showered before bed and when he got up just to wake himself up. He drank coffee at his place and then got another cup on the way into work. He was going to need more coffee in his veins than blood to make it through the day. He was still the first to arrive and turned on the lights as he moved through the bullpen. It was normal. It was ritual. he pointedly didn't look at Spencer's desk because the picture from a winter visit to the zoo with Jack was sitting there, ready to mock him. He had no clue exactly how Spencer was going to act when he got into work but Aaron was going to play it however he wanted. There wasn't a chance though that the team wouldn't realize that something was going on.

"Aaron," ADD Michaels said from the hallway leading farther into the depths of Quantico. "When you get your stuff settled down, join me in my office please."

Aaron nodded. The ADD usually split his time between DC and Quantico as far as working so it wasn't odd that he was there. What was odd was him waiting for Aaron. He quickly dropped his stuff off in his office, leaving the light off. Michaels was gone when he got back so Aaron made his way into the depths of the building. Michaels' secretary wasn't even in yet and his door was open so Aaron knocked on the doorframe. 

"Come on in."

"Sir." Aaron took a seat and stared at him. 

"I'm not going to tap dance around this. Doctor Reid came to see me last night and has requested, and I approved, an open ended sabbatical."

Aaron's heart leaped up in his throat and he just stared. 

"We have cited health reasons on his paperwork so that Strauss can't complain. He said that he'll come in later today and talk to the rest of the team but that he needed the morning."

"Sir, I can..."

"Off the record," Michael interrupted. "He told me that it was deeply personal. I could see how wrecked he was and I agree that if he's that upset, he's better not in the field."

Aaron looked away from Michaels and saw a paper about a request for someone to lead an investigative task force in Pakistan. He picked up the paper and looked it over. He had all the qualifications plus some extra. It was a six month tour but the ability to leave after four if needed for prior work. He just looked at the paper. Maybe distance would help. He wouldn't have to look at the team. Wouldn't have to go out on cases and see that empty space that Spencer had been in. Jack had Jessica and Spencer would be more apt to be around the boy if he wasn't around. He'd be able to SKYPE with him every day. Distance. Distance was the perfect solution to it all.

Holding up the paper, Aaron nodded. "I'll take this position."

It took two hours to hammer out all the details and for Aaron to get his marching orders. He had a week before he'd leave. When he finally entered the bullpen it was to a lot of eyes on him and that's when he saw it. Spencer's desk was empty. There was nothing left on it. He had made sure not to look at it when he'd gotten to work that morning so he had no clue if Spencer had been in or not.

"Reid's already talked to the rest of the team. He said that you and he said all you needed to say. What's going on?"

"It's personal."

"Personal? Reid's taking a sabbatical and that affects this team so it's become un-personal."

Aaron turned to Dave and glared. There must have been something on his face because the glare almost never worked on him, and he backed off. Dave held up his hands and moved to his office. JJ, Blake, and Morgan were all looking up at him, and he ignored them. He had to get his things together and talk to Jessica. There was a daycare service that he could use since he was going abroad that would help her and give her time to herself since it was going to be summer when he was gone. He'd make sure that his apartment was taken care of and mail forwarded to Quantico. Jessica was set up in her place and it wouldn't take much to get her set up as an added person on his main bank account so that she could get things for Jack. She already had all medical rights when it came to Jack. He had a lot to do and not a lot of time to do it. With a final look at the empty desk, Aaron sat down to start to work on getting Morgan named as acting unit chief. He knew that Dave didn't want it and he would back up Morgan if needed. Michaels had already agreed to it as had Strauss once she knew why Aaron was leaving. She was bound to be upset to lose two more members of the team but had to adjust quickly. 

When Aaron boarded the military transport a week later, his only regret was that he'd never told Spencer. He had taken the man at his word and hadn't contacted him at all. He'd had Jessica promise not to tell him until he was out of the country. Morgan and the team knew how to get ahold of him and Jessica had the SKYPE information. Distance and time, he just needed distance and time.


	52. August 2011

Strauss left the team standing in the round table room. Prentiss had come back to the team. Aaron's transfer to Pakistan had been pulled and he was back but the only person left was Spencer. Aaron hadn't known that he'd ended his sabbatical but after talking to Strauss alone, he still hadn't requested to come back to the team. He'd been working as just an agent inside the BAU before Prentiss's return and had helped with the Doyle case just to help. He'd been shocked when he'd arrived back to Quantico and had seen him. 

"You knew," Morgan said interrupting Aaron's thoughts. He looked to see exactly what was going on. He found Morgan standing in front of Spencer. "Of course you knew. Hotch's friend, he probably doesn't keep a single thing from you. Why the fuck didn't you tell us?"

"Derek," Garcia started as she moved towards him. Morgan shrugged off the hand that she settled on his shoulder. His eyes were locked on Spencer's. Spencer just snorted at him. 

"Morgan," Blake said, trying to get his attention. The whole room was tense. Aaron expected to see some kind of emotion on Spencer's face but there was nothing. Aaron looked at him. Really looked at him and all he saw was muted eyes. There was no spark of happiness in them. Aaron's heart broke at that. 

"Do you want to know how I know, Morgan?" Spencer took a step closer to him and Blake shifted from trying to keep Morgan back to being prepared to keep Spencer back. Aaron just stood on the far side of the room. JJ and Dave stepped closer. "Because Hotch was so wracked with guilt on keeping it a secret, of having to lie to his son as well as us that he broke down one night. The only thing is, he didn't think it was me. No, he thought it was an older me. One who knew what had happened. He begged forgiveness for lying to me. Then, instead of saying he was sorry all he did was beg that I tell no one. So don't you just sit there and blame me. I lost my best friend. I lost what makes me happy and I lost everything that gives me a reason to live because of that secret. So, you and your anger can go fuck yourself."

The sound of a pin dropping could have been heard in the room but all Spencer did was grab his messenger bag and leave the room. No one even tried to stop him. He walked right to the stairs and went down them. When Aaron looked at the team, Garcia was crying silent tears while JJ and Prentiss looked on the verge of them. Morgan looked like he'd just watched someone kill Clooney in front of him. Dave and Blake were looking at each other. 

"Hotch?" JJ asked.

"It was when he cut his hair short. I didn't know that he was thinking of getting it cut at all. He was in my apartment and I had given him a key because sometimes he comes over to meet Jack when I have to work late and Jessica drops him off. I didn't have the lights on and I thought it was an older him."

"Henry got gum in his hair," JJ said. She cleared her throat before continuing. "And it was high enough that it's what caused the short hair. I paid to have it done. We don't even know where Henry got the gum. It was that next day that he asked for the sabbatical."

"Yes and that I agreed to the overseas transfer. He's right. I didn't even try and explain anything. I just begged that he not tell anyone. I was so worried about Prentiss that I never took him into account."

"Why would you need to?" Prentiss asked.

"When his father left, his traveling ability shutdown but stress and grief can also make him travel more. His first day of high school, he traveled seventeen times in one day. It was short trips but still."

"He came to my place for ten weeks crying. I wondered why it became more frequent after the sabbatical but now I understand. He visited Jack. Even brought him over to mine for visits or would take Henry with him. I think they went every weekend to the zoo."

"That's because the zoo is Jack's favorite place and Reid knows all the facts. He actually started to run out and had to do more research on the animals at the zoo to find out more." Aaron laughed despite everything. He remembered nights of Spencer reading up on things about lions and tigers just to have things to tell Jack. Aaron dropped into a chair at the table and cradled his head in his hands. Taking deep breaths he tried not to cry. He knew exactly how much he'd fucked up. He had already gone through how much he could have hurt Spencer. With him traveling uncontrollably, he'd have been pulled off active duty. If he was on a case, he could travel into a situation on a case that was harmful. Aaron hadn't thought about him. He'd pushed to protect Prentiss so much that he'd neglected everyone else. 

"I'm alive and we can fix this, Hotch." Prentiss crouched at his side. She rested a hand on his knee. "Go and talk to him."

"He's not requested to join the team again," Aaron stated. 

"Then talk to him until he comes back," Blake said from somewhere behind him. 

"Tell him, I'm sorry. I spoke without thinking."

"We've all fucked up a little on this," Prentiss said. 

Aaron took a deep breath and stood up. JJ hugged him and the whole team seemed to relax a little as they looked at him. "I'll go talk to him. If no one has heard from me by morning, Reid's killed me and you won't find the body."

"Too soon, Hotch," Blake said but she was smiling. The team moved out of the room, Morgan with his arm around Garcia. JJ and Prentiss, arms linked. Blake and Dave moved towards his office. He texted Jessica and told her what his plans were. That he planned to get on his knees and beg. Jessica agreed to stay with him until he was done. After not seeing Jack that much, Aaron should have been going home to him but bringing Spencer home with him as well would make Jack happier. He knew that he and Spencer had broken up. It made him sad and he felt horrible for it, but hindsight was twenty-twenty. 

Before he left, Aaron stopped by the showers and shaved. While the beard was good for face protection in the deserts of Pakistan, Jack hated it and really so did he. When he was done, he showered as well and dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. He chose carefully on the jeans. It was a pair of his that he'd brought to work on accident as after work clothes. The jeans were old and faded and the softest thing he owned. Spencer loved him in them. 

The drive to Spencer's was full of anxiety. He almost turned around three times by the time he parked in what had become his spot. He left everything in the car except for his keys. He moved to the stairs to go up to Spencer's floor and tried once again when he got to the floor to turn around. He was the only one who could convince Spencer to come back though. The team wanted and needed him and Aaron had admitted to himself that he needed the genius in his life when he'd been unable to sleep a month into his stay in Pakistan. He'd stared at the stars and just thought about how exactly his life had gotten to where he was. 

Aaron knocked before he could second guess or fiftieth guess himself. Spencer opened the door after a minute and he didn't look shocked to see Aaron standing there. Worried he was going to be denied access, Aaron readied himself to slip his foot between jamb and door. 

"Come on in, Hotch," Spencer said as he turned away from the door. The use of the name Hotch burned. He was used to hearing it when they were working, but here in Spencer's apartment he'd only ever been Aaron. He stepped inside and shut the door. He had a lot to apologize for, but he needed Spencer to look at him. The younger man was in the kitchen fixing what looked like a cup of tea. Aaron stopped at that. There was a string hanging out of the cup and while he was certain it could be bagged coffee, he'd seen Spencer use it before on cases but never in his own home. It was brewed or nothing. Aaron took a few steps to read the tag. It was chamomile tea. He'd never seen Spencer drink it before. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your company?"

"Spencer..."

"Reid," Spencer said coldly. He turned around and leaned against the counter, eyeing Aaron. "We are nothing more than work colleagues. Best to keep the names formal. I'll be discussing my placement with the bureau with Michaels and Strauss first thing Monday morning. Michaels was ready to rake you over the coals for hiding Prentiss like that."

"I'll talk to him if he wishes."

"I don't think he cares much at this point. He's basically already told me that I can write a ticket anywhere in the Bureau and get what I want. I was thinking of going back to Vegas."

"Don't." Aaron watched as Spencer's head shot up. "Don't go that far away."

"You have no say in what I do." The cold tone in Spencer's voice sent alarms through Aaron's mind. He looked at him and saw that his eyes were still the muted looking they had been. He wanted to know what had gotten them looking like that. He was worried about his words to Morgan about taking away his reason to live. Aaron didn't want to be his reason to live. He wasn't ready for that type of commitment. While he knew that before all of this they had been together for what he assumed was the rest of their lives, it hadn't happened yet. He was at his place and Spencer was at his. There was no pressure. 

"I'm sorry for leaving like I did. I'm sorry I took the coward's way out and left without telling you. When Dave found out, he bitched me out. Jessica told me that you came by that weekend. She was so mad at me as well. We can't fix this if you go away."

"I was under the impression that you didn't want to fix this." Spencer looked away from him, taking a sip of his tea. "Or what was I supposed to think about you running to Pakistan without even letting me know."

"I deserve that. I was such an idiot and I regretted it after I was there a week." Aaron moved closer and when Spencer didn't even look up or move away, he moved right into his space and stopped when he could feel the heat off of his body. "Give me a chance to fix this, please." He cupped the younger man's cheek and forced his eyes up to his. He could see the mutedness but there was sadness there as well. Aaron hurt with how much pain he'd given him. "Please come back."

Aaron closed the distance between them slowly. He made his movements known so that Spencer could push him away if he wanted. With his free hand he pulled the mug from Spencer and set it on the counter behind him. When he brushed his lips on Spencer's, it was tentative. When there was no reaction, Aaron brushed them over Spencer's in a firmer manner. The sigh that escaped Spencer told Aaron all he needed to known and he closed the small distance between their bodies. Spencer lifted his hands and framed Aaron's face, the warmth from the mug burned his cheeks but he didn't care. All he cared about was the way that Spencer was kissing him back. The pressure, the warmth, and the taste of his lover. 

When he felt on the verge of tears, Aaron pulled his lips away and wrapped his arms around Spencer to hold him close. Face tucked into his neck, Spencer relaxed into him. "If you ever do anything like this again, I'll go. You'll never see me again. Even if I travel to a spot ten feet away from you, you won't know I am there."

"I won't. I promise." Aaron kissed the top of his head. 

"So exactly what are you going to tell Jack?" Spencer asked, but the tone was something that Aaron had only heard when he was interrogating UnSubs. It was his "I am smarter than you" voice and Aaron didn't like it being used on him. He pulled back to look at Spencer's face. There were no clues there. 

"What do you mean?" Aaron asked. 

"What exactly are you going to tell Jack? He attended a funeral that was very much like his mother's funeral. You told him that his Aunt Emily was dead but now she's alive. How exactly are you going to explain it to him that you lied? How are you going to explain it in a way that isn't going to mess with him? What exactly are you going to tell him that isn't going to get his hopes up that his own mother isn't going to come back as well?"

Aaron took a deep breath and considered how he was going to tell Spencer that he didn't lie to Jack. He knew his son well and knew the boy could keep this secret. He didn't want to hurt Spencer anymore than he already was and knowing that Jack knew when he didn't just might push him away further. He knew he was taking too long to answer when Spencer continued.

"Didn't go that far with your plan did you? I spent a day wondering if you'd hid her away like that but when you told Jack. When you took Jack to her funeral...I didn't think you would be that heartless. That's what made me believe that she was truly dead and then your little confession after fucking me. The ground dropped out from under me with that. I could only think of Jack. How much it was going to mess with him. You need to call his therapist and talk to her before you talk to him. I suggest telling him with she's around. Probably Jessica too. He's too much like you and he won't like that you lied to him."

"Like he's going to like that his friend Tristan who, in his eyes, doesn't visit enough, is really you?" Aaron asked, his voice hard. Spencer looked like he expected that barb.

"He knows. He thinks it's kind of awesome that I time travel. Of course, he wanted to tell his friends but between Jessica and I, we explained that he couldn't. I was visiting him and I disappeared only to appear back about two hours later. By then Jessica had explained most of it to him. Then Tristan appeared in the living room the next day. Jack was shocked when he ran to me. He was nine and mom and dad were in the middle of a giant screaming match. Jack wasn't aware that I knew Tristan and well...Tristan blurted out how could he not know me because we were the same person. Jack put it all together and they played until Tristan left a few hours later. Jack then made the comment that he wondered why you had a drawer in your room of some of his older clothes. He donated an outfit to the pile. He gave up his Spiderman shirt and his blue shorts with a Captain America and an Iron Man sock as well. He understands secrets. He'll understand protecting her but he's going to be very upset that his mother can't come back like that."

“Spencer,” Aaron sighed and knew he had to say something. “Jack knew. I told him the truth because I thought about it and knew what it might do to him, but I love that your first thought in this whole thing was Jack , and that doesn’t change the fact that I ran like a coward to not have to face the team and the ghost of you."

"Jack understood that part. That you were out there doing good. Although I think you'll score brownie points for shaving off the fungus on your face." Spencer smiled at the words he said but it wasn't a happy smile. "He asked me what grew on things that it shouldn't and changed them and the first thing that I could think of was fungus and well...that's how your unfortunate facial hair got it's name."

"He wouldn't tell me where he got the name from." Aaron stepped closer again and pulled him close, brushing lips over his forehead in an apology. "JJ said you spent a lot of time with him and Henry."

Spencer laughed and Aaron wondered exactly what he was laughing at. "I...I traveled to when Jack is home visiting from college."

That piqued something in Aaron's memory. He remembered older Spencer. The picture of his son and his partner and their daughter. He tried to remember the picture to see the partner. His best friend. Jack's best friend growing up. 

"I don't know who was more shocked, me or Jack."

"Or Henry?" Aaron asked. He closed his eyes and laughed. He couldn't see the picture but Jack loved to play with Henry even though he was a few years younger than him. "Wait where were you?"

"At home."

"What were they doing there?" Aaron figured that the dodge of home meant that it was a place that they shared together. 

"We were away on a case over spring break for Henry and Jack. Henry was just starting college by the look of him. You aren't shocked."

"An older Spencer showed me a picture of his son once and said that his partner was his best friend growing up. Apply son to Jack and best friend to how I have see those two and it wasn't hard to get four. I just hadn't thought about it. So you were a cock block?"

"Unfortunately yes. They brought their dog with them. I startled the dog and Jack came running down the stairs with your gun from the desk in your office."

"They were having sex in my office?" Aaron was incredulous. He wasn't shocked on the gun. He'd started teaching Jack about gun safety before he went to school. "Remind me when we get back from that case to disinfect my office."

"He had a condom on so you know that whatever sex talk you have with him stuck." 

Aaron couldn't help but laugh at that. He stood there and laughed with Spencer in his arms. He didn't want to think of Jack having sex, ever. "Come back with me. I won't push. I just. I want to feel you in my arms when I sleep. I got used to a body there on occasion. I want to thank you for helping with Jack. I know that you could have just not bothered at all."

Aaron had heard about moments like it before. That moment where you knew that you had said something so monumentally stupid that you wanted to take it back but Aaron couldn't. There wasn't just anger in Spencer's eyes. There was disgust and malice too. He had never see that look on his face before. Not even when they were dealing with UnSubs. Aaron was about to start backing up when Spencer advanced on him. The first poke to his chest happened and all that Spencer could do was mutter incoherent words. Aaron took another step back and all Spencer did was step as well. A poke to his chest happened again and it was starting to hurt.

"YOU!" Spencer uttered before he poked him again. He withdrew his hand and it looked for a second like Spencer just might slap him. Aaron would have taken it. He knew that he'd said exactly the wrong thing. He had never in his life said something so horrible. 

"Spencer."

"No. You don't get to talk. You get to listen to me and keep your mouth shut!" Spencer spat at him and Aaron nodded. "I don't know exactly what being in Pakistan has done to your brain but you need to get it checked out. What part of my fucking life has given you the thought that I would EVER leave a child who loved me? Did the heat scramble your brain?"

Aaron didn't answer because while Spencer had asked him a question, he hadn't been given leave to talk yet and he wasn't going to do another thing to vex him. Aaron just kept his mouth shut and let Spencer stare at him. 

"You know that I love Jack with all my heart and that love isn't dependent on yours. It's nowhere near that. If you think that I would ever leave a child, you can just take your ass out of my place and never darken my doorstep again."

Still Aaron kept his mouth shut. He wanted to say so many things. He said something stupid and he wanted to correct it. He knew that Spencer would never leave a child. Not after what his father did to him. Not after Jack had lost his mother. 

The sound of an alarm going off startled both of them. Spencer reached into his pants and pulled out his phone. He silenced the alarm and turned back towards the kitchen. He grabbed a bottle and shook out two pills and tossed them into his mouth. Aaron could only watch as he swallowed them with a bottle of water that was sitting there on the counter. He moved to the sink and filled it back up before setting it back down near the bottle. It was a prescription bottle. Spencer didn't take anything. Aaron knew that from working the field with him. 

"You can speak," Spencer said as he grabbed his tea back up and moved towards the chair. 

Aaron wanted to start with the bottle but he decided to wait instead. "I am sorry for what I said. It was stupid and I wasn't thinking. I know that you would never leave him. I've known that since the moment that I figured out that I was the partner you talked about. What I meant to say was that you kept him happy while I was gone. You and Jessica took care of him when I wasn't here and I love you for that."

"Okay." Spencer sipped at his tea again, his eyes going to the bottle and then to Aaron. He was waiting. He wasn't going to offer information but it didn't seem that he didn't want to not talk about it. 

"Are you sick?"

"Depends on your definition of sick." Word play meant that he was ashamed of them. 

"What are the pills?"

"Mood stabilizers. I've been on them since two days after Emily's funeral. Doctor Tanaka and I were afraid of what the grief was going to do to my traveling and we'd had limited success with the pills before. I was on double the dose for a while but we've cut that back."

"You went on double after our fight and when I left." Aaron waited for the nod before he stepped closer to him. "What are they treating?"

"Depression. Anxiety. Also, they help me sleep."

"You never talked to me about this." Aaron felt sick. That explained his eyes. How had he not noticed before that. He hadn't noticed the change in his eyes until that night of their fight. When he'd confessed his sins. The doctor was probably using a higher dosage to make sure he was stable. 

"You'd pulled back after the funeral and I tried to get you to talk but you never wanted to. I gave you space because the one time I tried to talk to you, you got mad and I'd rather have you distant than mad. It was so close to Haley and I just wanted you to get better. I wanted to feel better. Then the confession and you left. I came to your house to tell you about the pills and how I'd been doubled up because the day after our fight I traveled seven times, even on the medicine."

"What is it?" Aaron moved into the living room and crouched in front of the chair but Spencer shifted his legs and Aaron smiled. He sat down in the chair and pulled Spencer's legs over his, it was the same way they had been sitting the night that he'd found out that Spencer was Tristan. It felt good. 

"Seroquel. And we are slowing down my dose. It was never meant for long term just to help keep me from traveling and it adding to my agitation and anxiety which was stopping me from sleeping which was making it all worse." Spencer sighed and closed his eyes. Aaron could see his hands were shaking so he took the mug and set it down on the table at his side. Spencer curled into him and Aaron wrapped his arms around him, pulling him close. The head tucked under his shifted and then he could feel hot breath on his neck. His hand started to rub up and down the younger man's back. 

Aaron didn't think anything of Spencer's silence until he felt the wetness on his shirt. Before he could even reach up to touch his face, Spencer's whole body was shaking with the tears that he was crying. Aaron chose to just hold him. Words were inconsequential right now. Spencer just needed to be held. He needed to purge out all the emotions he'd been holding in check and Aaron was a safe place to let them out. 

It was half an hour later that Aaron realized that Spencer wasn't crying anymore and that he was a dead weight on him. His plan had been to talk to Spencer and get him to come back home with him. Jessica was waiting on him. So, he made a snap decision because he didn't want to wake up Spencer and he didn't want to not see Jack. 

Aaron lifted his phone to his ear and brushed hair from Spencer's face. He looked at peace, happy.

"Aaron, how is Spencer?"

"Asleep on me. Do you think you’d mind bringing Jack here? I want to see him and seeing us together will be good for him given the roughness of the last few months. I'd also love it if you would pack me a change of clothes."

"I can do that. I've dropped Jack off to Spencer's before so I know where he lives. Jack is waiting for you so it won't take long for him to get packed. I'll see you soon."

Aaron wondered if he'd be able to stand up with Spencer in his arms or if he would drop him. He shifted the younger man a little and felt that he was lighter than he had been. He knew that Seroquel could cause some people to lose weight mainly because of a decrease in appetite but he was fairly certain that Spencer's loss of weight had more to do with grief than his medication. He'd make sure that they got up in time for breakfast at Spencer's diner and if Jack hadn't been there with him before, it would be a treat for the boy. His legs shook a little as he stood but Aaron maintained and found that it wasn't hard to carry him into bed. Either the pill had kicked in or it hadn't been helping him sleep as much because he didn't wake when Aaron stripped him of his pants or his over shirt. Left in just boxers and a t-shirt, Aaron covered him up and moved to wait for Jack. He found linens for the couch and set it up. Jack wouldn't mind sleeping on the couch, if he didn't end up in bed with him, happy to have his dad home. Aaron vowed he wasn't going to do anything like that again. It had hurt him far more than it had helped him. He had what he needed.


	53. October 2011

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New tag above. I love that tag. I love it so much.

Aaron had been excited to find a new training partner. Beth seemed like she was going to be fun to run and bike with. Right up until Dave made a comment about getting back on the bicycle. The look on Spencer's face of utter confusion had just added to Aaron's own. Then on the plane. There had been no down time on the case where Aaron could talk to Spencer alone and he wanted to talk to him. He'd heard what the team had been pushing at. He'd heard the statistics about men going out on dates after divorce. 

He watched Spencer through the whole case but nothing. He didn't act any different than normal. The first night though he did notice that he'd taken his Seroquel. He was down to a low dose but Tanaka was lowering the dose at a much slower rate than would be used with most people. No one on the team commented on seeing him take them or that two cases ago, Aaron had not woken him up when the UnSub struck in the middle of the night. He knew that even if he was able to get Spencer awake, keeping him awake would be impossible with the Seroquel. He wasn't sure who on the team knew that Spencer was on a mood stabilizer but it wasn't his place to talk about it. The cases where Spencer had to take the dose late, JJ always had a cappuccino waiting on him when he woke up. Outside of Aaron, Spencer spent the most time with JJ and Blake so he kind of figured that those two knew more than anyone else. 

On the flight home, Spencer sat with Blake and Dave and discussed a new book that had come out that all three of them were interested in. Aaron sat alone and tried to work on as much paperwork as he could so that he could enjoy the next day off. He had plans with Spencer and Jack and didn't want anything to mess them up. After Haley had died, it was a rush to get Jack's things set up at his apartment. The room was a mishmash of things that Aaron had on hand and things from the house. The bed had been the one that Aaron bought for him when he graduated out of a crib. It had bars at one point but those were long gone. The desk and bookshelves were from the house. A dresser was bought quickly because his from the house was too big for the room and the one that Aaron had for him wasn't big enough for his clothes. 

Jack's room had been emptied of all things before they had been called out on the case and instead of going ahead with the painting, Jack wanted to wait until he and Spencer were back. So Jessica took Jack to her place for the duration of the case. Aaron wasn't going to be shocked if Jack woke them up at the crack of dawn to get started on painting his room. Aaron was looking forward to it. He hoped that the closeness of the day would get rid of whatever he was feeling. He and Spencer had been wonderful since August but there was something else just on the edge of Aaron's mind that was stopping him from being truly happy and he couldn't figure out what it was. 

"Plans on your day off?" Dave asked.

"Redecorating Jack's room. We got called out on the day we were supposed to start it."

"The kid going to be helping?" 

"Of course, it's his room." Aaron waited for Dave to get to the point of what he was asking.

"No, Reid. Since he came back to the team, you two seem to be joined at the hip when we have down time. Maybe that's why you haven't been dating?" Dave asked.

"Reid is the only person that Jack wants to spend time with since his mother's death other than Jessica, Henry, and me. I'm not going to deny him that."

"And you shouldn't, but that has to get old. Even if he is your best friend. Why don't you and Jack work on his room together. It'll be a wonderful father/son project." 

Aaron thought about it for a moment and he didn't know what to think. Dave's words made sense. He looked at his friend though and tried to figure out why he cared so much. Had they all been waiting to see him make a mention of dating again before bringing it up? He liked that they cared, but he was happy with what he had. They didn't know what he had but he didn't want their meddling. 

"So I'm supposed to deny Jack what he wants because you think that my friendship with Reid is keeping me from dating?" Aaron looked out of the corner of his eyes but Spencer was reading a book with a pair of headphones in. Blake looked like she was reading as well. Prentiss, JJ, and Morgan were out of sight in the seats in front of Aaron but they had been sleeping. 

"No. Jack will love to have some just you and him time. He's probably just used to having Reid there for everything and believe me it was nice of him to step in and help when Haley died but it's time for some you and him time."

"I don't..."

"Aaron, he needs to get out there himself." 

Dave's words made sense but not for them. Neither of them needed to get out there. They had each other, they loved each other. It just wasn't time to tell the team that. Before Prentiss's faked death Aaron had been thinking of it. The team wasn't back on steady feet anymore. 

"He's not even been on a date, ever."

"How do you know?"

"Morgan and Garcia tried to get him to go out with them. He turned them down. Then, when Morgan was talking to him about a wonderful woman that he thought that he might like, Reid told him that he didn't want to date. We know that with his traveling and intelligence, he's isolated."

The sound of a moving body alerted Aaron that someone was up and moving around. Aaron looked up to see that it was Spencer and he could see that his headphones hadn't been connected to anything. Using the noise cancelling effect of the headphones without having music playing in them. Aaron sighed.

"Rossi, have you ever entertained the thought that the reason that I turned down going out with Garcia and Morgan was that I didn't want to go to a club. That the crush of people and the throbbing, pounding music would trigger a traveling event? Or that the reason I turned down Morgan's generous offer to go on a blind date with a woman was that I am not interested in women? Tulsa two months ago, the team, minus Aaron, got into a discussion of first kisses because of something that Garcia said on the phone. I guess that when I said that I'd been kissed by a girl first and a boy second and that I liked the second kiss better kind of went over everyone's heads." Spencer paused to take a breath and he turned from Dave to Aaron and Aaron shivered at the look in his eye and it wasn't from pleasure. "Don't worry, Hotch. You and Jack have fun. Alex and James invited me out to lunch since he's in town and wanted to meet up with me."

Spencer moved back to his seat and this time he plugged the headphones into an MP3 player. He opened his book back up and pointedly looked at no one. 

"Spence?" JJ asked. She leaned over to try and get his attention but it was futile. Prentiss got up from her seat and sat down beside him and nothing. He wasn't turning pages. 

"He's in his head," Aaron said. JJ turned to look at him while Prentiss just looked up. "All he can hear is the music and all he can see is whatever he has going on in his head. It's a coping technique he's learned as a kid to try and calm his mind. It didn't stop him from traveling but he does it when he's emotionally overwhelmed. The only thing that is going to pull him out is the landing of the jet."

"Aaron," Dave started but he stopped when Aaron looked at him. 

"Spencer knows little of social cues," Blake started. She stopped for a second and Aaron saw Morgan shifting to what had been JJ's seat, he leaned out so that he could see everyone. "Growing up like he did with his mother and then the traveling, his intelligence that put him six years ahead of his peers. He reads body language to tell him when someone is bored with what he says. In one discussion, Dave you have insinuated in his mind that he has been taking advantage of his best friend and spending too much time with him and his son. You've also seemingly missed what the rest of us had figured out in Tulsa. The last time that Morgan invited Spencer out they went to a bar. No pulsing lights, no loud music. He said that he had a wonderful time, even with Morgan scoping out guys for him. He said that he'd do it again. He is a grown man who knows what he wants. Hotch is also a grown man who can tell Spencer when he feels he's spending too much time with him and Jack. Stick your nose back into your business." 

Aaron closed his eyes and tipped his head back onto his seat. Dave was silent and the rest of the team was as well. The last hour of the flight was dead silent. Aaron was too lost in his own mind that he barely registered when they landed, but he realized that Spencer had come out of his mind as soon as they had touched down. His MP3 player and book were put up in his bag and he was the first off with his go bag in hand. He was in his car driving away. Aaron had been shocked that he'd driven to the case when he'd realized it. He hadn't had the chance to ask him about it. Then the thought of the meds he was on and how it slowed down his traveling so maybe he felt safe driving into work. 

Dave got into his car after handing off his report. The man was sulking and Aaron knew it was going to be an epic one. He hated that someone had gotten a better read on someone than him. Aaron just wanted to get in his car and go after Spencer. Morgan stepped up to him and took Dave's file. 

"I'll take care of these Hotch. You go and try and settle down Pretty Boy. He didn't look good. I didn't know that Dave felt that he was taking advantage of you and your time together. And when we went out that last time, he told me that he had a significant other but asked me not to tell the rest of the team, that he'd tell them when the time was right. I figured that you would know but if you didn't, just pretend."

"No, I know. The problem is that he's not around right now."

"Is it that partner he's talked about? I think that what Dave was trying to say was that as long as Spencer spent time with you he was never going to meet that partner."

"It's him."

"Look the way that I see it, if you are happy and he's happy and Maddox doesn't kick your ass, no one else should have a say in how much time you spend with anyone."

"Maddox isn't ever going to have an issue with me hanging around Spencer." Aaron thought about how Spencer had talked to someone on the team about them it just wasn't who he thought it would be and using his rarely said middle name as his partner's name was smart. He should have thought about it given that Spencer used his own in the past. He didn't know what it was that hadn't put him and that elusive partner into the same little hole in Spencer's life. He had been blind, too much wanting the younger man to understand that he was what the man had wanted. 

"Thanks, Morgan." Aaron moved to his car, which he had parked next to Spencer’s and found the younger man's file under his wiper. He picked it up and handed it over to the other agent. 

"Text me when you get him settled, okay?"

"Sure." 

Two hours later, Aaron had no clue where Spencer was. He wasn't at his apartment and he wasn't at Aaron's. He called and texted and had only gotten one thing back. Spencer asked him that unless it was a case, he wanted to be left alone. He'd turned back for home when he got that. He really didn't want to go home without the genius but there was nothing else he could do but give him space. Aaron knew exactly what he did wrong. He should have told Dave that his life was his own and shut him down instead of trying his hardest to keep Dave happy at the expense of Spencer. Yes, Jack liked to have him around, but Aaron liked it too and he never fully outright said that. It was all about Jack. He'd been a coward. There was something else there as well. Something that had been nagging about Spencer and his reactions around the team for over a month. He hadn't been able to put his finger on it. 

Jessica met him at the door, which was odd but when he heard laughing, he hoped. Aaron rushed in to where the couch was but instead of his Spencer it was an older Spencer. He looked to be somewhere in his fifties or sixties. 

"Aaron," Spencer said with a smile on his face. 

"Where are you?" Aaron asked. If Spencer was thrown by the question, he didn't show it. Instead he moved up and cupped Aaron's face.

"Jealousy is a two way street Aaron. You were so jealous of yourself without ever knowing it. How do you think that I feel, watching as you don't even tell the team that you are fine. That you aren't looking for someone. I don't want you to come out and make a grand expression of your love but something that tells the team you are fine would be nice."

"So nothing about where you are hiding?"

"Hiding? I'm getting my head on straight. I'm in the place I always go when I need to get my head on straight, in the correct timeline at that. It's not my fault that you didn't even think to check there." Spencer smiled at him and then he was gone. 

"Dad! Spencer said that my room is going to look so cool when we are done with it." After hugging him, Jack looked behind him at the shut door. "Is Spencer not coming?"

When Aaron didn't say anything, Jack's eyes widened. 

"Did you fight again?"

"Sort of. It wasn't just me though. Uncle Dave made him mad and I didn't stop him."

"Why not?"

"Because I was an idiot." Aaron looked at Jessica who was getting ready to go. "You can stay, Jess."

"No, I think that father/son time is just what you need." Jessica kissed his cheek and then she was gone. Aaron didn't know what to think of it. 

"Is that why Spencer called earlier? Why Jessica didn't let me talk to him? Was he telling Jessica that he wasn't coming."

Aaron sat down on the couch and pulled Jack to sit beside him. "I don't know why Spencer called earlier. I don't know what he said to her."

"Why don't you tell the team about you? Would they be that upset with you for loving him?"

"I don't know how they would react. I just...I guess that I don't want to share that with them. I can understand why aunt JJ tried to keep uncle Will a secret for as long as she did. Them knowing does change things and Spencer has never brought it up. He'd never talked about wanting the others to know."

The phone rang and Aaron moved towards it. The caller id stated that it was his house. He cocked his head to the side and picked it up. 

"Hotchner Residence."

A snort was the only thing that came down the line and then a giggle. The sound that came next sounded like two people fighting over the phone. An over dramatic sigh came next. Aaron was about to hang up when the scuffle stopped and a voice came over the phone.

"Aaron?" Tom asked. He sounded normal but someone else was there giggling. "I just wanted to let you know that I have Spencer here. A drunk Spencer."

"He's what?" Aaron had never heard of Spencer getting drunk before. He wasn't allowed to drink on the Seroquel so he was worried about that as well.

"Tell him that the doctor has weaned me off the pills," Spencer said in the background just loud enough for Aaron to hear. 

"I heard him," Aaron said but he was tempted to drive out there. 

"Good. I'm not sure if he's sad or mad or what has caused this but I've cut him off and I have him in the house. He was in the hideaway. Good news is that it takes nearly a whole bottle of rum to get him drunk, for future reference. I'm going to go. He said he wanted to be up to help Jack paint his room so I'll make sure."

"Did he drive there?" 

"Yes and I have his keys. I'm going to sleep with them under my pillow. There isn't a place in this house that is safe from him and his lock picking skills. I'll make sure he's up in time to get to your place by eight am."

"Thank you, Tom."

"I'd do anything for him." Tom hung up and Aaron was quite certain that the man was mad at him. 

"Spencer will be here by eight in the morning to help with your room Jack so I think we need to see about getting some dinner and then a bath for you."

"Okay." Jack seemed in better spirits now that he knew that Spencer was going to come by. Aaron wondered if that was the only reason he was coming by. If Jack wasn’t depending on him, would he be coming by? He knew that Spencer loved Jack but was that the only thing keeping him around? Things had been rocky since his return but Aaron didn't know if it was coming from him or from Spencer. He was hesitant on his own. Was Spencer picking up on that? He didn't know and he wasn't sure that he liked not knowing. 

Aaron moved to Jack's empty room and found that the only thing that hadn't been taken down was a calendar. It was a week to Halloween and Aaron knew that Jack was excited. Garcia had sewn him his costume for the year. His eyes tracked back to the beginning of the month and he felt nauseous. Spencer's birthday had passed and he hadn't done a thing for it. Spencer had been there that day. There hadn't been a case. He'd been in a new sweater and Aaron had commented on it and Spencer had said he'd bought it as a gift for himself. He hadn't even said a thing about anyone missing it. 

The only thing that Aaron felt was anger. He knew it was stupid but he was mad at himself and mad at Spencer. Spencer should have brought it up. Did he expect everyone to just remember? He was shocked that Garcia hadn't but that wasn't here nor there to him. His anger kept him awake a lot longer than he would have liked. 

When morning dawned, Aaron was tired and more than ready to just go back to bed but he knew that he couldn't disappoint Jack. He showered to try and remove the feeling of crappiness from his body and then braved the living room. He was sure that Jack was already awake and preparing for painting. The day that they had made the plans, Aaron had listened to a two hour discussion between Spencer and Jack on how to make sure that no paint got on things that it didn't need to go on. Drop cloths, paint tape, and other things were bought. Jack had even gone through his clothes and found a t-shirt and pants that he wanted to become his work clothes. The smell of pancakes filled his nose and Aaron took off to the kitchen. 

He expected to find Jack at the stove cooking but instead he found Spencer. 

"What are you doing?" Aaron asked. He knew that his tone was sharper than it needed to be but he didn't care. It wasn't even seven am yet. What the hell was he doing there? How did he look so good when he was so drunk last night?

"I called and Jack answered the phone. He was awake so he let me in."

"You've said I can answer the phone if it's a number I know. I know Spencer's number."

"I know. You can't just open up the door to strangers though."

"He stayed on the phone and he did his special knock. I heard it through the phone and the door." Jack was sounding more and more upset while Spencer's face was just shutting down. 

"Jack..." Aaron started but stopped when Spencer switched off the knob on the stove. He walked over to Jack and crouched at his side, whispering something in his ear. Jack looked at Aaron and then turned back to him. His son nodded and then hugged Spencer. Jack looked back at Aaron.

"I want pancakes for breakfast, dad."

"Isn't that what Spencer is cooking for you?" Aaron asked after a minute of trying to process what had happened but he looked and Spencer was gone from the room. He heard the click of the front door shutting. Aaron ran to his bedroom and threw on a pair of pants. He didn't care about going out without a shirt but he wasn't going in his underwear. As he was racing out the front door the doors on the elevator were shutting. Aaron ran to the steps and started down them. When he reached the bottom he didn't see Spencer anywhere and he waited for the elevator to make it down. When it opened finally, there was only an older couple on it. He waited and even checked the stairs but Spencer was nowhere to be found. 

Opening his front door, Aaron saw that Jack was still seated at the table. His glass of milk was half gone but his plate still empty. Aaron moved to the stove to see that the pancake in the pan was done just a little cool. He heated the skillet back up and cooked two for Jack, eating the first one cold with nothing on it. 

"What did Spencer say?"

"That you weren't up for company and that it was best that maybe he didn't help today. Can I have Uncle Derek come and help me?"

"You don't want me to help?" Aaron felt crushed. 

"I think maybe you need some you time, daddy. Maybe then you will feel better."

"I'll call Morgan and ask him."

Aaron grabbed his phone and texted Morgan. It wasn't long before he got a message back from the other agent. He'd be over within the hour. Aaron went to his office and shut the doors. He heard Morgan arrive thirty five minutes later and Aaron let him in before going back. 

He sat at his desk and thought about his life. He hadn't thought a single thing of how much Jack had come to rely on Spencer. How much his son turned to Spencer and not him. He wasn't sure that it was a good thing so close to Haley's death. But what could he do?


	54. November 2011

Aaron knew body language. He knew it well, especially a certain person's body language. So when he got off the elevator to see Spencer standing there, leaning against the wall outside his apartment door on a Tuesday after work, he knew that it was going to end in the fight that had been building since that damned case where Dave had opened his mouth and inserted his foot and Aaron hadn't done a thing. The younger man wasn't dressed in the same clothes that he had been in at work. He'd been wearing a sweater at work. There was something familiar about the clothes but he couldn't place it. He was a little shocked to see that he had his gun on him and no messenger bag. 

"Spencer."

"Hotch." 

That hurt. Aaron though got angry instead of sad. Spencer had barely spoken to him since leaving the week before, disappointing Jack. The room had been finished, exactly to the way that Jack and Spencer had planned but it wasn't the same. What was supposed to be a fun day with Jack had turned into hell because of him. 

"I'd rather not do this in the hall."

"For once, we agree on something," was the only thing that Spencer said. He looked at Aaron with a strange look on his face and he couldn't place it. He let himself into the apartment, Spencer waited for the alarm to go off before he stepped inside and shut the door. 

Aaron knew what he wanted to talk about. What had been the elephant in the room. The team had been shocked by the handshake that he'd given Spencer at the impromptu birthday they had thrown for the younger man. Spencer had been the first to leave the party. He'd moved over to his messenger bag and pulled a small wrapped box out of it. Then he'd set it down at the table in front of Aaron. 

"Since I'm on leave starting when I leave today, I wanted to make sure you got your birthday present." Spencer had left then. Walking out without even looking back at him. Aaron had taken it for what it was, a jab. The team hadn't known what to say to that. They just stared at the box. Aaron never wanted his birthday celebrated like the others did. Gifts were slipped into his office and a single cupcake would be found on his desk after he took lunch. His birthday, when they were in town, was the only time he indulged in a long lunch alone. Up until the start of the fights, Aaron had been looking forward to inviting Spencer to go with him. Then the genius had put in a leave request to go visit his mother starting on the first of November and running for a week. Aaron had opened the gift and sighed at the custom made set of black cufflinks. He knew the image that had been etched into the face of them. It was the hideaway. His anger at the younger man had been building again since then. If he had wanted Aaron to have the gift before he left, he could have not made a scene at work. He could have dropped it off at the apartment or even given it to Jessica.

"When does your flight leave?"

"Doctor Norman called, mom is refusing to see me. I changed my ticket to an open flight time and I'll call back each morning to see if that's changed."

"Does she do that often?"

"No. This is the second time."

"That was a shitty thing you did, at the office." Aaron finally turned around to face him. Spencer hadn't moved from the doorway. He was nervous. He was nervous to be alone with Aaron. Aaron didn't care.

"What, making sure that you got your gift? My flight was set to leave and I didn't have time to stop by and give it to you. I had to run to the store on my break to pick it for you. I didn't have it when we started the case. I got the call it was done yesterday. Sorry for wanting to give you a gift."

"You could have given it to me in private."

"We haven't exactly been allowing ourselves to be alone with each other, Hotch."

"Quit calling me that!" Aaron took a step towards him but he didn't back up or seem to be backing down. He just widened his stance and cocked an eyebrow at him. 

"Why? It's your name. It's who you've been for months now. Hotch is the leader. The one who can't show weakness. You came back from Pakistan changed in ways that I can't understand. Oh, you showed weakness that night in my apartment but you woke up Hotch the next morning and you've not changed since then."

"Stop."

"The truth hurts doesn't it? Like going through work all day expecting anything from you. Something that acknowledged that it was my birthday but nothing. I couldn't give a crap that the team didn't remember. Then I thought that maybe you just didn't want to draw attention. You invited me over for dinner when we were leaving so I went home and changed. Showered. Packed up a bag of clothes. Then all night, I spent more time with Jack, which was very nice, but I didn't get to see you. You found reasons to be away from me the whole night. Why did you even ask me over? You commented on my sweater but didn't even blink when I said I'd bought it as a present for myself. Then you walked me to the door before Jack even went to bed."

"Work had been stressful.” Aaron knew it was a lie even as he said it but he didn’t want to go down that path at the moment. Not with Spencer standing right there.

"Bull fucking shit, Hotch."

Aaron felt his anger tick up another notch. He clenched his fists and stared the younger man down. 

"Two years ago, you were dealing with the attempted murder of Haley and Jack, the death of Foyet and the shit storm that me shooting him was going to cause and you fucking remembered. You hadn't had contact with Tristan for years at that point and you barely knew me. I wasn’t even sure if you remembered me. Yet it was one of the first things we talked about. So don't fucking tell me that you are too stressed."

"I spent a year worried to death about you!" Aaron yelled. He watched as Spencer's face didn't change and it made him even angrier. He hated that look. "I looked for you everywhere. Missing children reports and all kinds of things. No Tristan that went missing fit your description. No boys did. I didn't understand why you hadn't come back to me. I worried that I had created you as a fantasy but there was too much and then Tom talked about meeting you and I knew that you weren't a figment of my imagination. I thought that you'd been hurt on a trip and had died. Don't tell me that I forgot you."

Spencer at least looked shocked at his confession and that was when Aaron realized what had been the thing that had been bothering him. He'd known it, but he hadn't let it process in his mind. Spencer had been all in, in their relationship, from the word go. From the moment that he joined the team he knew what he wanted and he had only been waiting for Aaron to be ready. Every bit of anger inside him fled at that. 

“I’ve loved you since I was six, Aaron. You were my best friend and as I got older my only one. I was so scared though of someone overhearing us or figuring out that I was a time traveler that I lied about my name but I never lied about anything else. Then there you were on graduation day. I was so happy to see you. We were meeting in the correct timeline then I felt it. I hated running from you but I had to. I couldn’t do that there with everyone around. And what happens? I travel to a day where I see myself getting shot by a killer and I save the ex-wife of the man I love. You need to figure out what you want because forgetting my birthday is a lie. You may have deluded yourself but you can’t me. You made yourself forget it and then you were surly after it.” 

Aaron had nothing that he could say to that. Nothing at all. He just stared at Spencer for a few seconds before turning and leaving. Spencer didn't even try and stop him. Aaron didn't know what to think about that. Either Spencer was done with him or he understood that he needed time. He'd fucked up and he need time to think.

Before he knew it he was parked on a hill that Jack loved to come and sled on during winter when it snowed. Aaron had found it during a case a few years before and when Jack was old enough he'd started to bring him to it. It was at the edge of DC but it had a spectacular view of the city. He felt the guilt creeping up on him. For everything he'd put the other man through. All because he was scared. He was scared of exactly how well Spencer fit into his life. Tristan had done the same thing but as a child it had been easy to accept it. Now that he was an adult, he feared it. 

Aaron had never thought that he would be so scared of something as accepting, wholly that he was going to spend the rest of his life with Spencer. He'd accepted it in broad terms. Happy that he wasn't going to be alone for the rest of his life. It was the little things in the grand scheme of things. Telling the team. Having Spencer move in with him. Actually going out on a full date. He'd called what they did before dates. He'd never been big on showing affection in public, even with Haley but he would at least act like they were a couple. The discussion that started this round of the fighting wouldn't have happened if the team knew anything of their relationship. Spencer wouldn’t have been hurt but the casual words that Dave said. 

He'd said the words by rote, meaning them but not really showing them. He was jealous of Jack's time spent with Spencer, he hadn't been until Dave had brought it up. Yet it was exactly part of what he was feeling. Because he wasn't thinking of them as a family unit. He was thinking of them as Spencer and Aaron, Aaron and Jack, and Jack and Spencer. Not Aaron, Spencer, and Jack. He’d never been jealous of the things that Jack wanted to do with Haley and not him. He hadn’t needed to be. 

Sighing, Aaron laid his head back so that the only thing that he could see was the ceiling of his car. One of his teachers at Hargrave had said that he could see him sabotaging his own happiness. That's what he'd done. And it wasn't just affecting him. It was affecting Jack. Haley wanted Jack to have a happy life and Aaron was ruining it with his own cowardice. He'd accepted Spencer into his life the day that he'd shown up at his apartment and had a gun pressed to the back of his head. 

Aaron jerked to an upright position as that night came back to him. That horrible night that could have been so much worse. That Spencer that had leveled a gun at him had been wearing what Spencer was wearing at his apartment. He tried to remember his face, the age of him but it was elusive. The anger though. That fit with how that Spencer had been with him. He turned the key to start the car. 

Driving home as quickly as he could, Aaron tried not to break any driving laws. He really didn't need to be stopped. He didn't even attempt the elevator, just bypassed it and took the stairs three at a time. The apartment was locked when Aaron tried the door. He unlocked it and quickly disarmed the alarm. The lights were out so he turned them on and that's when he saw the blood. He touched it and it came up sticky. Spencer had been gone a while. Aaron found a note on the floor beside the blood and when he lifted it he realized there was money under it. 

_Hotch,_

_This should cover getting your floor clean and the towel I took with me._

Aaron threw the money to the ground and grabbed his phone. He didn't give a shit about carpet he only cared about Spencer. He tried Spencer’s cell but it rang until voicemail picked up. He left a message begging Spencer to call him. Morgan the only one he knew of that knew Spencer was with anyone so it would make sense to call him. He dialed the number by heart and waited for the other agent to pick up. 

"Don't tell me we have a case, Hotch." Morgan sounded tired and Aaron felt bad for just a second. 

"Not in the normal sense. Have you seen Reid?" Aaron tried not to let his panic bother him. 

"Not since he left work. I have a feeling things are not going well with Maddox."

"Morgan, my middle name is Maddox." Aaron waited for something on the other end but there was only silence.

"Oh. Then..." There was nothing but silence on the other end. "No wonder he took Rossi's words badly. And no wonder he is so upset with you. What happened?"

"He called me on how I was acting around him. I left and when I came back I found blood. It didn't click until I was thinking, but he's wearing the outfit I saw him wearing the day he shot Foyet."

"You said you never saw the older Spencer."

"Not in the house. I saw him later when I went to current time Spencer's apartment. He was still bleeding so it was before he got help. The thing is that I have no clue where he is."

"So you think he is out there somewhere and bleeding, hiding from you?"

"I say he is just pissed at me. Can you check his apartment? You’re closer."

"I'll call Garcia and have her track his phone. I'll make sure she keeps quiet. When this is done, I talk to both of you. I want the whole truth from the moment he joined the team to now."

"Whatever he is comfortable telling. I'll leave all that to him since I have proven that I am not the best when it comes to it all." Aaron figured for a while that he would be giving in to a lot of things that Spencer wanted. He felt like shit and it wasn’t going to get better until he had him in his arms. 

"Look, Hotch, he loves you and has said before you guys are happy together in the future."

"Or have I fucked the future up? I've not seen an older Spencer other than a few minutes and he never said we're still together. I know that Spencer has said that nothing we have done changed the future but I can't help but think maybe I have. I love him, Morgan and I need to make sure he knows that."

"What are you going to do if Strauss finds out?" 

Aaron wasn't going to lie. This would be the best test of the reactions of the team. "Spencer took care of that. His contract states that we can't be brought up for it. They try and he's gone and can sue. Right now though we need to find him. You check the apartment and with Garcia. I'll hit a few other places."

"We'll find him Hotch and he's going to be fine." Morgan hung up before Aaron could say more. He pocketed his phone and started for the door. Just as he got to the elevator it opened to Jack and Jessica. 

"Aaron?" Jessica asked.

"I need to go. Spencer has been hurt and I don't know where he is. I'll find him and bring him home. There is blood on the floor. Throw a towel over it and I'll take it off tomorrow."

Aaron leaned down and kissed Jack's head. The boy looked sad but Aaron didn't have time to reassure him. "I'll bring him home, buddy. I promise, and we aren't going to let him leave. He's ours." 

Jack hugged Aaron's legs and then took off for the apartment. 

"If he wants to wait up, let him. I'll try and remember to text if I find him."

"Go. This is the day that Foyet tried to kill Haley and Jack isn't it? Where an older Spencer got shot?"

"Yes." Aaron wasn’t sure how she knew that but he didn’t care at the moment.

Taking the stairs again as the elevator had been called down; Aaron tried to think of where he would go. Spencer's car was in the garage so he was worried about driving. So how was he moving about? He'd never heard talk about how older Spencer said he got shot. He knew that he was shot in the right shoulder and that was pretty much it. Aaron stopped when he thought about how Spencer was off for the next two weeks. Had he known? Two weeks was enough time to be allowed back on light duty with no in the field work. Had he been just planning on never telling him? Coming back from his vacation with a gunshot wound and a doctor’s clearing him for light duty? Aaron felt his heart break at that. He had to find him. 

An hour later, Aaron was slumped in the last place he could think of that was close. There were a lot of places around Aaron’s apartment that Spencer liked to go. Book stores, coffee shops, and two parks were the main ones. There was no evidence of him at any of them. If he got on a bus or took a taxi, he could be anywhere. His phone ringing startled him and he jerked it from his pocket, hoping, but it was just Morgan.

“Did you find him?”

“No. His apartment is empty and the guard on the desk said that he hasn’t seen him since he left after coming home from work. He is going to call you if he comes back. Garcia had a little luck but it’s not the best either. She tracked him thirty miles from here but lost it.”

“Did she send you the coordinates?” Aaron asked.

“Yes.”

“Text them to me.” Aaron waited for the text to come through, keeping his ear away from the phone. It came through and he knew where that was. There was only one reason that Spencer would be headed in that direction. He lifted the phone back to his ear. “Morgan, I’ll text you an address. Meet me there. I know where he is or at least where he is headed. Bring supplies to treat the wound, please. I’ll pay you back.”

“Okay, Hotch.”

Aaron sent off the text and got into his car. He drove, his mind racing at how much of an idiot he had been. It should have been his first thought. Once he was on the highway he called Tom but the man didn’t answer. Aaron kept trying up until he pulled into the driveway. He didn’t even pull the keys from the ignition, just raced for the house but it was locked. His keys for the place were back at the apartment. The locked door didn’t meant that Spencer wasn’t inside though. He tried to spot any blood on the ground but it was too dark and the outside lights weren’t on. That meant that Tom wasn’t going to be home that night. It was starting to rain pretty hard and by the time that Aaron made it into the backyard, he was dripping wet. 

Slipping in between the trees, Aaron moved quietly but not so much that he wasn’t making noise at all. He knew that Spencer was armed and he didn’t want to be shot.

“Spencer?” Aaron called out when he was ten feet away from the hideaway. The rain started to come down harder and Aaron flicked the collar of his coat up around his neck more. He hoped that Tom had been keeping the hideaway protected. The lantern was on so Aaron was fairly certain that his lover was in there. He didn’t know what he was going to see when he stepped in so Aaron took a deep breath before he opened the flap. 

Spencer was curled into a ball in the corner, using the two boxes to help hold him up. Once Aaron had slipped inside, he shrugged off his jacket and set it aside where its wetness wouldn’t get on anything. Spencer was breathing, Aaron could see that much but he wasn’t moving. One of the blankets from the box was draped over him but it was slipping down. He sat down to where he could pull the younger man into the V that his legs made, setting his good shoulder against his chest. He pushed the blanket down to Spencer’s waist, getting a good look at the field dressed wound. He’d used what was in the kit in the hideaway. Doing the best that he could one handed. 

“Aaron?” Spencer asked. 

“Shush, I’m here, Spencer. I’m here.” Aaron kissed the top of his head as he heard what he thought was the faint echo of a car door slam. He pulled his phone free from his pocket and texted Morgan to go into the woods in the backyard and that where they were couldn’t be missed. Aaron tried to shift them around to where Morgan would be able to help him with Spencer more but the younger man reached out with his injured arm to try and stop him. Aaron stopped and pulled Spencer’s arm back down gently but he still felt the genius’s body stiffen in pain. “I’m sorry. How much did you rip it traveling back and forth to the past?”

“Bad.”

“Where were you when you went to the apartment?” Aaron was trying to distract him, he knew it wasn’t really working but he needed to stay calm and talking would help the both.

“Still in your place.” Spencer shifted and hissed his pain. The flap on the hideaway opened and he tried to pull his gun with his good arm but Aaron stopped him, pulling the gun free himself. He set it aside. Morgan was frozen. He looked around the little hideaway and then settled on Spencer. 

“How you feeling, Pretty Boy?” Morgan asked as he set down a bag and then took his soaked coat off. 

“Been better?”

“Yeah. See this is what happens when you take on crazy killers alone.” Morgan tried to make light but Aaron could see the look that Spencer was giving him.

“Wouldn’t have made another choice if I had the choice.”

“I know.” Morgan scooted the rest of the way over. The hideaway had seemed big when Aaron was younger and it was just him and Tristan but now with three grown adults inside, it was tiny. “Scale of one to ten.”

“Right now, five. When I move a ten.”

“You call sitting there not moving a five?” Morgan asked.

“High pain tolerance,” Aaron answered for him. He pushed the injured man into a more upright position and then pointed at the small heater in the corner. Morgan followed his gaze and nodded. By the time that Aaron had Spencer’s upper body clothes off, Morgan had the heater going. 

“Nice setup you have here. I see why you kept coming back, Reid.” Morgan opened his bag and started pulling out everything. Aaron was shocked when he saw a still sealed needle and a small bottle of stuff come out. Spencer saw it as well and started to shake his head. “Calm down. It’s not going to hurt you. It’ll take the edge off while Hotch and I clean it out.”

“It’s a narcotic.”

“Yes.”

“NO!” Spencer said. 

“Morgan, narcotics make him travel more. We need to minimize his traveling until he’s healed. I’ll keep him still while you care for the wound.”

“He should see a doctor.”

“I will. I’ll go and see him tomorrow. He’s not on call and I won’t call him tonight and I don’t want to go to the emergency room. I expected Tom to be home.”

“Tom?” Morgan handed over a few pills of over the counter pain relief and Spencer took them with no protest, washing them down with a bottle of water. When he tried to stop when the bottle was half gone, Aaron tipped it back up. He drank with a glare. 

“My groundskeeper. He lives on the property.” Aaron hadn’t ever really brought up his childhood, outside of knowing Tristan. He didn’t want to. He knew he had a life of privilege and most of the rest of the team didn’t. There were times that Aaron would have traded his life for Morgan’s, scars and bad times too just because he had parents and siblings who loved him. That would have meant no Spencer though and he’d take the pain for him. Aaron ducked his head to whisper in Spencer’s ear. “I love you.”

“This is yours?” Morgan asked. 

Aaron was thankful that Morgan was ignoring the look that Spencer was giving him now. They’d talk more once he was gone. “It’s the house I grew up in. I was given it when my father died. I used to rent it out but after a while I’ve just kept it empty and let Tom live here. He keeps Tristan busy when the boy shows up and I am assuming Spencer.”

“Don’t need kept busy,” Spencer protested. He gripped Aaron’s arm hard with his good hand and buried his face in his neck as Morgan started to clean the blood from around the wound. “Lucky it was a through and through.”

“Very.” 

Aaron whispered calming words into Spencer’s ear while Morgan took care of the front side of the wound. Then it came time to sew the wound shut. Morgan looked up at him and Aaron nodded. It needed to be stitched shut in case he traveled. Spencer was muttering under his breath and it took a few moments for him to recognize what he was saying. He was reciting a book back to himself. When the other agent pierced his skin for the first time, Aaron felt his own skin break from where Spencer’s nails dug in. The words faltered and Morgan opened his mouth to apologize but Aaron shook his head. 

“I’m not the best at this. Haven’t closed up a wound on anyone in a long while.”

“It’s fine,” Spencer said through clenched teeth. 

Aaron tucked his head closer to Spencer’s and pulled him in tighter to his body. Spencer’s mutterings were growing louder and he heard plainly the words. “Where you tend a rose, my lad, a thistle cannot grow.” His words quieted as Morgan made his last stitch.

“You need to turn around for me,” Morgan said. Aaron helped move him to where the other man could get to his back. The process was repeated and Aaron knew that his own arm would need at least a bit of gauze wrapped around it but he didn’t care. He held Spencer tightly to him and pressed kisses in his hair at the times when his body was frozen with pain. 

When it was all done, Morgan had an over-sized button up shirt to slip Spencer into. It was flannel and would be warm to his body. 

“So this is your land, what is this?” Morgan’s hand moved around the hideaway.

“It’s where I hide away from the world,” Aaron answered. Spencer was neared passed out leaning on him. He combed his fingers through his hair. “Tristan was the only one who I allowed to come with me into here. Over the years we added things, boxes to store bed clothes and clothes for Tristan. Others for food and basic medical supplies. Books.”

“Can’t forget the books.” Morgan touched Spencer’s knee and the younger man didn’t react at all. “Take him home Hotch. I’ll cover for you tomorrow. Plus, it’s your birthday. Enjoy it with Reid and Jack.”

“I will. Thanks.”

“I haven’t forgotten the discussion that we need to have but we can put it off until he’s in better shape. Do you want help getting him into your car?” Morgan handed over Spencer's gun and Aaron tucked it into his jacket pocket where it was draped. 

“Yes. Just shut off the heater and the lantern. I’ll leave a message for Tom asking him to batten the place down in the morning.”

It took longer than Aaron would have liked, in the rain, to get Spencer to the car. Morgan had covered the younger man with his jacket and only took it back once he was down in the passenger seat of Aaron’s car. 

“Aaron?” Spencer asked when Aaron shut the driver’s side door. 

"Let's get you home." 

Spencer nodded and relaxed into the seat more. He closed his eyes and seemed to fall asleep. Aaron kept silent on the drive to his apartment. The pills had to have been taking affect. The only time Spencer reacted was when Aaron couldn't avoid bumps. 

Aaron parked in his spot and looked at Spencer's car. It looked at home there. Like it belonged. Like Spencer belonged, and he did. The apartment was small. Not as small as many were. Aaron had wanted space when he moved out of the house. He knew that he'd have to rearrange the office to fit some of Spencer's things in there. It wouldn't be hard to do that though. Spencer's computer was older than Aaron's and he didn't figure that the younger man would mind using his. He didn't care about computers other than using it to get his work done. 

"Where are we?" Spencer asked as he unlatched his seatbelt. Aaron reached over and cupped the side of his face.

"We are home."

"Home?" Spencer looked around and then he saw his car. "This is your apartment."

"Jack and I can't fit in your apartment, Spencer."

"What?" Spencer shook his head like he was trying to clear it, his face full of perfect adorable confusion. "Aaron, you aren't making any sense. Why did you bring me back here when you said you were taking me home?"

"Because I want this to be your home. I know that I messed up. I was an idiot and I realize that my fears put us into the fight. Morgan obviously knows and we'll tell the rest of the team as soon as possible. Jack's been missing you and that's my fault. I was jealous of how much you love him and he loves you. I'm sorry I ever made you doubt that I did love you. I don't want to go to sleep another night in my bed without you in it." Aaron watched Spencer's face as he talked. There was nothing there. He was processing. Aaron just waited.

"You want me to move in with you and Jack?"

"Yes. We can find a bigger place later. A house or a flat, whatever we want. After you are feeling better. Even if I have to break my lease. I can afford that."

"You kissed me in front of Morgan."

"I told him that my middle name is Maddox. I should be shocked you remember that from the single time that mother called me by my full name when we were younger but I'm not." Aaron leaned over and kissed him. When he was done, he didn't pull back he just settled his forehead on Spencer's. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you. No more hiding from the world."

Aaron thought about the tattoo and looked down at his chest. The tattoo was exactly where the gunshot wound was. He hadn't noticed the scar before on older Spencer. "How do you feel about a tattoo?"

"A tattoo?" Spencer asked.

"Instead of a wedding band? Something permanent."

"You've seen it before. Where do I get it?" Spencer pulled him down for another kiss, smiling as he did so. Aaron braced himself on the door and let the kiss deepen as far as Spencer wanted it. He trailed his hand over the dressed wound.

"Here."

"So we have a while before I get the tattoo."

"Yes." Aaron kissed him again. Spencer was tiring out and Aaron knew it but he didn't want to leave the car yet. It was a happy place right now. "You haven't said yes to any of this."

"I said yes a long time ago, Aaron. You just weren't hearing it. The second I signed those papers that declared me an active FBI agent, this was the end result. This was what I was agreeing to more than working with the BAU. You just needed time."

"And I am glad you gave it to me. Why don't we head up? I forgot to text Jessica that I'd found you and I told her she could allow Jack to stay up. They caught me doing my mad dash to find you so they know you've been hurt and Jessica put two and two together and realized what this was. Jack's going to be clingy. It's the first time either of us has been seriously injured since Haley's death."

"I know. The bed is big enough for all of us. I just need to get settled down and sleep."

"I'll help you upstairs. Morgan did a good job of getting all the blood so pajamas and bed for you until you see your doctor. He'll give you some of the good things that you can take. I know that we need to do a lot more talking but it can wait until we are both not tired and you are settled in. I faced years without you in my life, Spencer. I don't want to face anymore. I love you. I love you so much."

"I love you too, Aaron. Big you and little you," Spencer said with a smile on his face.

"Big you and little you," Aaron said back as he kissed Spencer's head before finally getting out of the car. Even with Spencer injured he felt happier than he had been in a long time. He'd let go of his fears and he was looking forward to forever.


	55. December 2036

Aaron was used to the feeling of Spencer coming home in the middle of the night after being gone for hours, days, and the rare weeks. He'd been gone for two days this time and Aaron was happy he was finally home. He heard clothes being stripped off and tossed in the hamper followed by a drawer being opened. It wasn't hard to see his husband moving around the room with a pair of sweats in hand. He'd seen it enough that he didn't have to open his eyes. He was nestled in the warm blankets of the bed with an electric blanket in between the sheet and the quilt that was on the top. It was on low but Spencer would probably turn it up to medium, depending on how cold he was.

Years living in DC and all the traveling he'd done there as a child still hadn't changed him out of a desert born man. It was December and there was a foot of snow on the ground so Spencer usually froze. The blankets lifted just enough for him to slip into bed without letting too much heat out. His motions were smooth, telling Aaron that he didn't know that he was awake and was trying not to wake him up. He waited until the younger man was settled and then he reached out and pulled his body to him. Spencer fit so well, still, to his body. It was like they were made for each other. 

"What time is it?" Aaron asked as he buried his nose into Spencer's hair and breathed deep. There was something strange there. He took another deep sniff and finally placed it. Sand and sea.

"Just after five. We have a few hours yet."

"You smell like sand and sea. Where exactly did you go?" Aaron shifted his arm to slip under the t-shirt that Spencer had put on. He heard the click of the remote for the blanket and smiled. He knew that he would do it. Spencer was predictable because of their long years together. 

"Hamptons." Spencer shifted back just enough so that they were perfectly molded together. Aaron laughed. 

"When?"

"I met a very nice young man. Still in college. He was running on the beach and stopped to talk to me. A looker, especially all sweaty. We talked for hours."

Aaron thought about it. He tried to remember any of his trips to the Hamptons before he and Spencer took Jack every summer and then later Henry as well. The first summer, Spencer and he had bought one of the nice smaller beach houses so they could go whenever they wanted away for a few days. Then he remembered the trip with Haley where she got sick. He'd forgotten about it. The older man on the beach. "My first vacation with Haley and she got sick. She kicked me out of the house."

Spencer shivered as he tried to snuggle into Aaron's body farther. Going from summer in the Hamptons to winter in DC meant that Spencer was probably freezing. Aaron tucked the blankets around them more. 

"Only you would go to the Hamptons in the middle of summer and decide to come back to Virginia in the winter."

"Can't miss Christmas. Jack and Henry are bringing the twins and Candace. I can't miss Christmas." Spencer's words were slowing down and Aaron knew that he was falling asleep. Aaron kept his words to himself until he was sure that his husband was asleep. It was still hours before the house would be beset with the rest of the family. Jack and Henry had taken two weeks off of work and were coming to stay in the house for that two weeks. 

An alert went off on his phone and he rolled just enough to grab it and Spencer grumbled. Aaron read the alert that the door to his old bedroom had been opened. The security system that had been installed had been wonderful for them as it meant that Tristan and Spencer, no matter their ages, could get access to the house with no keys. The hideaway was still in the woods but there was a note for them to come up to the house and to go to Aaron's old room along with how to access the house. A quick look at the camera feed from the hall showed him that it was a nine or so year old Tristan. It was three days before Christmas. He wrote a note in the app to make sure that more food was bought for meals. Candace would love to have a friend to play with and the twins would love to be read to. 

Spencer and Aaron had moved into the old house when Aaron had moved to a desk job. A new groundskeeper had been hired in and Tom had a small house built twenty years before at the back edge of the property and was still living there. The new groundskeeper, Elan, visited with him, and Tom helped as much as he could. Out of being bored more than anything. Elan had gone to school for horticulture and was the gardener on hire for many of the houses on the block. He had his own house two blocks over. When Tom had wanted to retire, Elan had been the only person he wanted to hire. Tom had been training him since he'd wandered into the backyard at age five. 

Tucking his phone under his pillow, he settled down to try and get a little more sleep. Even though he hadn't been unit chief for several years, he still got up with Spencer when he had to head in. With Jack out of the house, he went in with Spencer and when the younger man was on cases, he stayed at the office a lot longer than he probably should. He should have been a lot higher up on the food chain at the FBI but he was content to stay as section chief that over saw all of the BAU teams. When Morgan had transferred to a desk job, Spencer had been put in as unit chief. His traveling had slowed down a great deal and most years he could count his travels on two hands. The two of them were the only ones left in the BAU. JJ had retired when she turned sixty and she and Will had moved to New Orleans. Prentiss was still with Interpol and Blake was still teaching at Harvard. Dave had retired to Arizona and wrote as much as he wanted, which wasn't a lot. Garcia was in charge of all the analysts for several departments, but she answered the phone whenever Spencer called her, needing help with vexing problems. There had been others after but none had stayed long enough for Aaron to call them family. The house was going to be full for Christmas Day. Everyone who could make it was going to be there. 

Aaron had never called his childhood home, home. Not really, until he and Spencer had moved in. He'd been afraid that he'd wake up in fear at the memories, but his life with Spencer had tempered them all away. He stepped into the office and didn't see his father yelling at him or hitting him, he saw him and Spencer breaking in the new desk, much to Jack's consternation at helping the move in and finding that they had slipped away for half an hour. Jack had learned to not enter a room with a shut door without knocking first and getting an okay from someone inside not long after Spencer had moved into the apartment with them. Spencer hadn't been able to look the boy in the eye for two days after Jack had gotten home with Jessica early from a birthday party to enter his parents bedroom to find them having sex on the bed with no covers on them. He'd been so excited that they were home after a long case that he'd not knocked. He never did that again. 

He thought about their wedding, a small quiet affair that had happened in the backyard of the house. Dave had offered his mansion but Spencer hadn't wanted to get married there. Aaron hadn't been able to say no. There were so many good memories in the house now that Aaron couldn't see his father or his mother anywhere. Spencer had worked for years at remodeling the entire place. Going on trips to Vegas and coming back with substantial winnings. Aaron had tried to talk him into just using the money in their joint interesting earning accounts but Spencer had wanted it to be a gift to Aaron. It had taken two years of Aaron not being allowed into the house before Spencer proclaimed it ready. Tom had overseen the contractors doing the work and it looked nothing like it had before, outside or in. 

The house was perfect and Aaron was in love with it in a way he'd never been before. It was a perfect mixture of Aaron and Spencer and it was a testament to Spencer's love for him. Every single room made him feel safe and Aaron had wanted to move into it as soon as they could. An injury to his leg had forced his retirement from the field before he'd been ready but it had given him a reason to move into the house because it had an elevator. 

Aaron and Spencer had started with the house as their center, he wanted to end that way as well. And he wasn't going to regret a single moment since he'd talked Spencer into moving in with him. He knew that Spencer didn't either.  
**The End**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well here we are folks. The end of the journey. The last chapter. I hope that everyone who stuck it out with me over the past two months of posting enjoyed this. And if you are a first time reader, I hope that you enjoyed reading it as well.


End file.
